


Beneath the Moonlight

by FaeriexQueen



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Action & Romance, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Elements, Class Differences, Drama, Drama & Romance, Fairy Tale Elements, Fairy Tale Retellings, M/M, Mutual Pining, swan lake AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-01
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 129,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25663651
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaeriexQueen/pseuds/FaeriexQueen
Summary: As tensions grow and a string of mysterious attacks occur across the land, Kanda struggles to balance his responsibilities as both an exorcist and the sole heir to the throne. But when things begin to get a little more dangerous, he’s forced to step down as an exorcist, focusing entirely on the drudgery of advisor meetings, royal obligations, and a potential (and unwanted) courtship.Nothing is ever simple, though. And things get even more complicated when the stable boy he’s fallen for is ripped away from his life, a terrible darkness threatening to destroy them both.
Relationships: Kanda Yuu/Alma Karma, Lavi/Allen Walker
Comments: 101
Kudos: 30





	1. Prologue: Night of Darkness

Ice dusted grass blades, glittering in the moonlight like specks of crushed diamonds. The ground remained coated with a thick fog that loomed against the earth like an otherworldly shroud, weaving through the trees and motionless in the night as the shadows blended into one another like pools of ink, the forest cold and winding.  
  
His breaths spilled out haggardly, his body weak as he staggered through the darkness. His pace was uneven, muscles burning with wear; he forced himself to run, eyes wide as he tried to make his way through the forest. The air slipped into his lungs like ice cold knives, and his feet ached. However, he kept running. He kept running as the shadows blurred around him, moonlight trickling through the leaves like slivers of silver thread.  
  
He grunted as his foot caught on a rock, tripping and skinning his knees and the palms of his hands. Pushing himself up, he propelled himself into another sprint. The trip had cost him precious energy, the weakness in his legs unbearable. Knees buckling, he collapsed, his lungs straining as though a weight threatened to crush down onto his shoulders.  
  
_‘No…’_ He looked up, breaths shallow as he scanned the forest.  
  
Nearby, he heard a giggle.  
  
His blood chilled, heartbeat faltering as the noise echoed in his ears. It was so gentle and piercing, like a silver bell ringing from the fingertips of a faerie. Lulling. Enchanting. It terrified him.  
  
Fists balling, his eyes flashed, attention landing on his right arm where a gauntlet was attached. He cursed under his breath. The gauntlet illuminated as it _clicked_.  
  
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”  
  
He stopped, as the cool voice reached his ears. Muscles tight, his body remained tense, the presence of some unknown stranger looming behind him. He swallowed, and turned.  
  
A young man stood there, dressed in all white, with dark skin that glinted beneath the beams of moonlight. His hair was an unusually bright shade of platinum and in the darkness, his amber eyes gleamed…  
  
A third eye remained on his forehead: an eye of gold and black.  
  
The young man stared, his expression eerily calm. “You’re so terrified – I didn’t think I was that scary,” he said before kneeling down. He smirked, eyes cruel. “You’re terrified of a lot of things, though. I can see that, Suman.”  
  
He froze. The young man had said his name with such ease – yet Suman had not revealed himself to this stranger. Suman had never seen him. How could he have known his name? He couldn’t have known anything about him.  
  
“What do you want?” Suman forced the words out, throat dry. “You’re not-“  
  
“An akuma? No, I’m not like them,” the young man said. He tilted his head to the side, smirk unfailing. “I’m much, much worse – but you already knew that. Even if you didn’t realize it.”  
  
Suman’s jaw tightened. The words of the stranger seeped into his ears like acid, scalding as they burned his nerves raw. Suman didn’t know what it was: his mannerisms, his speech. But he wanted to get away. He _had_ to get away.  
  
Reactivating his gauntlet, Suman pushed back as he forced himself onto his feet. Quickly, he aimed it at the stranger, his eyes growing cold despite the tremor of fear in his chest.  
  
“I’ll shoot,” Suman warned. “So, tell me – what do you want?”  
  
The young man paused, his face becoming frighteningly unreadable. However, his lips quirked upward as he stood, laughing quietly. “Your intimidation tactics won’t work on me – not when I can read you as clear as day.” His eyes gleamed as he smiled. “You’re still so scared – that’s why you left your partner back there to die, didn’t you?”  
  
Suman froze, the words slamming into him like a slab of stone. _‘Marie…’_  
  
The young man took a step toward Suman, his smile never wavering. “That’s why you ran, wasn’t it? You knew you couldn’t win against that akuma. You retreated but didn’t even bother to see if you could save your comrade. How dreadfully _cold_.”  
  
Suman inhaled sharply. The accusation cut deeply, and before a second could pass, he was consumed by denial. _‘No.’_  
  
Although Suman had not spoken, the young man’s smile deepened. “You think I’m wrong? I’m not,” he said, words frosty as he took a step forward. “You abandoned him. Just like you were about to abandon your position. Because you hate them all deep down.”  
  
The words pricked like needles, and Suman seethed, a flare of anger swelling within him. “You don’t know what you’re talking about!”  
  
“Of course I do. I know all about how you feel toward them – your anger, your resentment. You only agreed to it because they promised to help your _family_ ,” the young man went on. “And you haven’t seen them in…how long has it been now? Quite some time, if I’m not mistaken.”  
  
Suman stilled.  
  
His family. He hadn’t seen his wife or newborn daughter in months. His work didn’t permit such visits often – exorcists were usually kept from their families for extended times unless certain situations allowed for otherwise. It was just too much of a risk. There was too much of an emotional strain, and being related to an exorcist could put them at risk. The danger was too much, and it was for their own _safety_. Suman has explained this to himself again and again despite the deep ache in his chest.  
  
By becoming an exorcist, they would be taken care of. Financially. Medically. They would be provided for in ways that Suman could never have managed on his own. And with a sickly daughter…  
  
The young man eyed Suman thoughtfully. “You know I’m right. You didn’t even want this. To fight this battle.” He peered at Suman, gaze unrelenting. “And don’t you hate them so much for forcing you into it? Those royals who act as though they’re God’s _favored_ , when _we_ were the ones to show them the light...”  
  
His words were spoken venomously, and Suman was somewhat taken aback. Once again, denial crept into his veins, though it was significantly weakened. “You’re-“  
  
He cut off, just as he felt someone grab his shoulders from behind. The hands were small, the touch simultaneously delicate and unyielding. Suman’s breath caught in his throat, just as he heard a sweet, silvery voice whisper into his ears – a young girl’s voice.  
  
“Don’t worry,” the girl whispered from behind, her smile creeping into her words. “This will only hurt a little.”  
  
Suman didn’t get a chance to say anything more. Quickly, before he could turn, the girl behind him pushed something sharp into his back – something painful and agonizingly searing.  
  
Inhuman screams filled the air.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Marie was barely breathing when he was found, and he was close to dead by the time he was brought back to the castle.  
  
The guards moved quickly, having located him in the forest just hours before daybreak. The exorcist remained unconscious as they took him into the medical wing of the castle, where he was quickly situated as the head nurse, Mathilde, tended to him. Although she had only just been awoken, she was alert, words strict as she ordered the guards to move out of the way.  
  
Tiedoll watched. He kept a fair distance away, knowing well that the head nurse would need space to work. However, even from his vantage point he saw the wounds: blood caking Marie’s skin, his flesh shredded raw. The sight was disturbing, and although Tiedoll was no stranger to violence, he could not quell the way his insides churned. Marie was so gentle, and so _young_ …  
  
Someone approached Tiedoll from behind, and he turned. When he looked, a guard stood.  
  
“Any sign of him?” Tiedoll asked.  
  
The guard shook his head. “We can’t locate Suman – we scouted the woods, but we couldn't find anything. At this rate, we’ll likely have to resume looking in the morning. We won’t find much when we can’t see.”  
  
Tiedoll’s heart dropped, expression unnerved. Suman was a strong exorcist, and one who had never had trouble defending himself before. If the guards hadn’t located Suman, that could only mean that something else had happened. Something….  
  
“Thank you,” he said, dismissing the guard.  
  
The guard nodded, and took his leave. Exhaling, Tiedoll returned his attention to where Marie was, Mathilde still tending to his wounds. Another nurse had arrived, somewhat frantically assisting with the process as they did their best to help the wounded exorcist.  
  
Once again, an unsettling sensation overcame Tiedoll. He didn’t know what it was that had done this to Marie – if it had been an akuma, or something else. They had all gone off that evening to look into some peculiar activity in the woods, but they had suspected it may be a low level akuma at most – one that none of them would have had an issue fighting. But, Tiedoll had split up from Suman and Marie while out in the woods, and now Marie was injured, and Suman was _missing_.  
  
Tiedoll realized that he should have stayed with them – that he had made a mistake.  
  
Back where Marie was, the nurse stepped back. Mathilde also paused, her expression grave as she observed the exorcist.  
  
Tiedoll took notice, and concern flickered across his expression. “Is he alright?”  
  
Both nurses looked up. Mathilde’s lips pressed into a thin line, before she shook her head. “His wounds are severe…if he can survive the next few hours, he may live. But it’s unlikely,” she admitted. “Even if he does, he’ll be blind.”  
  
Tiedoll stiffened, and took in a breath. He nodded. “I see,” he said, words low. “I’ll let His Majesty know…”  
  
His words trailed off. Their kingdom already had such a small unit, and if they lost two exorcists in one night…  
  
_‘Suman and Marie…’_  
  
Something had happened in the woods – something worse than an akuma attack. And Tiedoll feared as to what it had been.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Yuu couldn’t sleep.  
  
He blinked, as he sat up in bed. It was too dark in his room to make out the time, but it must have still been too early for any of the castle staff to be awake. Normally, he would hear someone moving about in the halls – a scullion, or a maidservant. But the castle was quiet, almost to the point of being unsettling. The air was still, heavy with soundlessness as the darkness loomed.  
  
Yuu squirmed. He didn’t know what it was, but the nine-year-old didn’t have it in him to go back to bed. A strange burst of restlessness filled his veins, which was only more agitated by how unbearably _silent_ it was.  
  
Heavily, he exhaled. He threw the blankets off his body as he finally crept out of bed, the floor cold against his bare feet. A shiver rippled through his body, but he ignored it, tiptoeing to the door as he pulled it open. The door creaked, and Yuu winced; the sound was shrill against the silence, like nails dragging along glass. He forced himself to ignore it as he slipped into the hallway, his eyes scanning the halls. Torches lined the walls, the flames providing some illumination, but it was otherwise empty.  
  
Yuu frowned. He pulled the door shut, starting down the hallway. He didn’t have a particular destination in mind; his father would likely be asleep at this hour, and the only people who would be awake were possibly some guards or scullions.  
  
That was fine – Yuu was content to wander on his own.  
  
He left the wing containing the royal chambers, navigating his way down to the ground level of the castle. His gaze remained wary as he entered into a corridor that connected to some of the common areas – guards usually patrolled those spaces, and Yuu knew he technically should have been asleep.  
  
Just as he rounded a corner, Yuu stopped abruptly and pulled back. He peeked around the corner, his attention landing on a group of people just a short distance away. Two men. The first was dressed in a dark uniform, with bushy, dusty brown hair and glasses – Froi Tiedoll, Yuu realized. The Exorcist General. And the second man…  
  
He was tall, and had jet black hair that was pulled back. Unlike Tiedoll, who was in an exorcist uniform, the other man was dressed in a simple tunic – however, he had an air about him that was steeped in authority.  
  
He also carried a sword with him.  
  
Yuu kept quiet, as he watched from around the corner. He recognized his father, Izo, but rarely saw him with his sword – especially at such a strange hour. Why would he have it with him?  
  
“The guards couldn’t find Suman,” Tiedoll spoke, words low. A pained edge remained in his voice, worry lining his features. “I’ll be going out to look again with them in the morning… Perhaps we will find something then.”  
  
Izo nodded. “Marie is still in the infirmary?”  
  
Tiedoll paused. “He is, but the head nurse isn’t optimistic,” he explained. “It’s…severe, I’m afraid.”  
  
Izo’s brow creased. “I’ll see him.” He glanced at Tiedoll, before continuing. “You should turn in – it’s been a long night. We may be able to find Suman in the morning.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded, before exhaling softly. “Yes, I hope so.”  
  
Yuu waited, watching as the two men split ways, with Tiedoll going in one direction and his father going in another.  
  
As soon as only his father was in view, Yuu followed him.  
  
He kept quiet, making sure his steps were light. Yuu remained a fair distance behind Izo, though he periodically would have to hide behind a corner if a guard passed. While there weren’t many, Yuu didn’t want to be caught – he wasn’t supposed to be wandering near the infirmary by himself.  
  
Eventually, Izo reached his destination. Yuu remained in tow, watching as his father disappeared into the room.  
  
Quickly, Yuu rushed to the door. He didn’t go inside, instead poking his head to look.  
  
On one of the beds, a young man remained. ‘ _Marie_ ,’ Yuu realized. He had seen the exorcist plenty of times before, and he had always been nice to Yuu. But he was now unconscious, and he looked _hurt_.  
  
Izo sat down beside Marie, no one else present in the room save for himself. He exhaled as he placed his word in his lap – a long, thin blade that was slightly curved and sheathed. Gently, Izo reached out, his hand tracing along the nasty gash on Marie’s head. It was the wound that was mostly likely to have been fatal.  
  
Quietly, Izo unsheathed his sword. As he did, the sleeves of his tunic fell back, his forearms bare. On the insides of them, the flesh was marked: the dull scar of a cross on each arm.  
  
Yuu watched, eyes wide as he witnessed his father put the blade to one of his arms. A faint glow emitted, before several drops of red spilled out. _‘Blood…?’_  
  
Yuu remained rigid. He didn’t understand what was happening, and the sight unsettled him. He wanted to say something, to demand what his father was doing; however, the words locked up in his throat, lodged deep into his chest as Izo placed his hand over Marie.  
  
A few drops of blood dripped, and Yuu heard something sizzle.  
  
Uneasy, Yuu pulled back – but did so too quickly, his balance lost as he stumbled. He gripped onto the wall, the slap of his grip loud as it shattered the silence.  
  
Izo turned, standing up. He swiftly sheathed his word, his sleeves once more covering his arms. “Who’s there?”  
  
Yuu grimaced. He knew he was caught, and based on his father’s tone, knew he couldn’t hide. Biting back his impulse to hurry back to his room, he forced himself to come out from around the corner.  
  
Izo’s expression softened as soon as he saw his son. His frown remained though, an exasperated sigh escaping him. “Yuu, what are you doing awake?”  
  
The child averted his gaze. “Why is Marie here?” he asked, before chancing a glance toward his father.  
  
Izo paused. He released a breath, walking over to where Yuu was. “He just needs rest,” he reassured, before nudging the boy along. “Come on – you’re supposed to be in bed.”  
  
Nose scrunching up, Yuu’s eyes gleamed defiantly. “ _You’re_ not in bed.”  
  
“That’s because I’m an adult. I have adult things to do.”  
  
Yuu huffed. He still didn’t understand what his father was doing, or why he had to get pushed back into bed. “That’s a stupid reason…” he grumbled.  
  
Izo’s eyebrow twitched. “Yuu. Bed. _Now_.”  
  
Crossing his arms, Yuu didn’t say anything. He started along, unable to try to detour anywhere else; his father seemed intent on making sure he got back to his bedroom, which meant his late night escapade would have to come to an end.  
  
Quietly, he shuffled along, his father walking beside him. Their steps echoed quietly in the darkened hallways, Yuu’s attention soon wandering. Inevitably, his dark blue eyes shifted toward where his father was still carrying his sword with him.  
  
Curiosity nipped at Yuu, and he looked up at his father questioningly. “Why do you have Mugen with you?”  
  
“I just needed it for something,” Izo answered.  
  
“What for?”  
  
“Nothing you need to worry about.”  
  
Yuu scowled. Once again, his father was being evasive – something that aggravated him greatly. But, Izo was often that way. He didn’t go into detail about what “adult things” he did. Especially when Mugen was involved. Quietly, Yuu’s attention once more wandered to the sword.  
  
Izo glanced down. He didn’t miss the way his son eyed his anti-akuma weapon, and exhaled softly as he stopped.  
  
Yuu stopped as well. He blinked, confused as his father knelt down beside him. Carefully, Izo took his sword, still sheathed. “Want to hold it?”  
  
Yuu paused. His gaze flickered to the sword, his childish curiosity quickly getting the best of him. A little hesitantly, he reached out, touching the handle of the sword before his other hand ran over the sheath.  
  
“Here.” Izo helped Yuu take hold of Mugen. “It’s heavy, isn’t it?”  
  
Yuu balanced the sword. Despite his father’s warning, he tried not to struggle, though the weapon _was_ a bit heavy. Yuu practiced some sword fighting, but he was only ever given smaller practice swords – he wasn’t ever allowed weapons like Mugen.  
  
“It does a lot more than destroy things,” Izo said, dark eyes flickering to Yuu. “That's what makes this one so special.”  
  
Yuu frowned. His expression turned bewildered as he looked back at Izo, brow furrowed in confusion.  
  
Izo sighed. “One day you’ll understand.”  
  
Yuu’s frown remained. He opened his mouth to question his father, but was cut off as hurried footsteps filled the corridor.  
  
Izo stood, taking the sword back as two guards approached. The guards were haggard and out of breath, appearing as though they had just run a great distance. “Y-Your Majesty-“  
  
“What is it?” Izo asked.  
  
The first guard took a few seconds, but finally managed to catch his breath. He stood more upright as he spoke. “We...there was some kind of explosion near the north woods. General Tiedoll has been alerted, and is going to look into it-“  
  
Alarm filled Izo’s eyes. “I see,” he said. “Please alert General Tiedoll to wait for me – I’ll accompany him.”  
  
The guards hesitated. They appeared wary of the suggestion but nodded in agreement. “Very well.”  
  
Before they could leave, Izo addressed the second, nodding to Yuu. “Would you please escort Prince Yuu back to his room?”  
  
Yuu frowned, looking up at his father. “I want to go with you-“  
  
“Yuu, just go back to your room,” Izo insisted. “I’ll be back soon.”  
  
Yuu scowled, unappeased by this. However, he didn’t get a chance to argue further before the guard placed a hand on Yuu’s shoulder, gently urging him back toward the royal bedchambers.  
  
He was only able to glance back one time, before he saw his father disappear into the darkness of the corridor.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The night air was cold – colder than what it should have been for a summer night.  
  
Tiedoll exhaled, his cloak managing to keep him somewhat comfortable. He took the reins of his horse, glancing over toward Izo, who was also cloaked, having dressed for riding before accompanying Tiedoll on horseback as well.  
  
“It was out here,” Tiedoll explained, as they reached the edge of the woods. “This is also where Suman and Marie were attacked…”  
  
Izo’s mouth pressed into a thin line, brow knitted. “And you’re not sure what?”  
  
Tiedoll shook his head. “No…unfortunately, I wasn’t with them. We had split up, but I heard something.” He turned back to Izo, expression grave. “If it was an akuma, it must have been a high level one, but I couldn’t find any traces of it. Once I found Marie, I had to hurry to bring him back to the castle.”  
  
“We’ll keep a lookout,” Izo said, before glancing back. Several guards had accompanied them as well. “Make sure to be on guard – Suman could still be out here, so keep an eye out for him.”  
  
The guards nodded, and the group started into the woods.  
  
As they trekked on, Tiedoll glanced toward Izo. “Are you sure about being out? Considering how this night has gone, it’s a risk to have you here.”  
  
“Well, it’d have been a risk to have you be the only exorcist out here,” Izo pointed out. “With Marie in the infirmary and Suman missing, there needs to be at least one other exorcist as backup…”  
  
Tiedoll sighed in understanding.  
  
They continued on a bit longer, the woods eerily silent. A low fog clung to the ground, bits of frost still glittering in the moonlight. Only the dull thud of horse hooves filled the air, the guards tense and uneasy as their gazes shifted about in the darkness, looking for any signs of movement.  
  
After a moment, Izo spoke. “You know, Yuu actually wanted to come out here…”  
  
“Oh, did he?” Tiedoll prodded. His tone lightened a bit, though he continued to eye their surroundings. “I’m not sure if I’m all that surprised – he’s a rather proactive boy.”  
  
“He is,” Izo murmured. “I’m starting to wonder if I should let him start training more, but he’s still so young.”  
  
Tiedoll hummed thoughtfully. “He is, but he has a lot that will soon fall on his shoulders.” He turned to Izo, and smiled gently. “It’s always hard to let go of them when they’re young. He’s a strong one, though.”  
  
“Strong and stubborn for certain…” Izo mumbled. “He got that from his mother. I always try to think about what she would do if she were still alive-“  
  
“ _Get down_!”  
  
Izo and Tiedoll barely had time to react, a loud explosion shaking the earth. The horses whinnied shrilly, the exorcists grabbing at the reigns to calm them despite the force that blasted through the air, smoke clouding through the trees and obscuring their vision.  
  
Quickly, Izo drew his sword. It activated, a pale green light emitting from it while Tiedoll activated his own anti-akuma weapon: a rod-like object and a cross that also illuminated, light sparking from it.  
  
“What is it!?” one of the guards shouted, though Izo didn’t see where they were. Aside from Tiedoll, the smoke was obscuring his vision, making it difficult to see anything-  
  
Something fast swooped through the smoke, and Izo turned. “It’s nearby-!”  
  
Again, something whipped through the smoke – but it was too fast for Izo or Tiedoll to catch, the creature camouflaged in the darkness. But it circled through the smoke, glimpses of cracked skin and deathly pale flesh seeping through the darkness…  
  
The creature shrieked as it attacked.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Sleep was a struggle for Yuu. He admittedly had started to get tired, with sleep tugging at his eyelids. However, any sleep he managed was light; it hardly qualified as restful, as he tossed about, slipping in and out of consciousness far too easily to find any peace. Something nudged at the back of his mind – something uneasy and unsettling. He didn’t understand it, and couldn’t describe it. But something felt…  
  
_‘Wrong.’_  
  
He tried to close his eyes, curling into the sheets. It had been a while, and his father hadn’t come back. Glancing at the window, it was still dark, too – why did the night feel like it was dragging on for so long? The nights always passed quickly, but this one felt endless.  
  
Quietly, Yuu scoffed. No, it wasn’t endless – it would be fine. Morning would come, and whatever had been going on would be over. His father would be back with General Tiedoll, and they would be alright.  
  
He kept telling himself this, as he finally fell asleep.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Morning came, and it was quiet.  
  
Yuu sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes. The sunlight was bright as it spilled in through the curtains, his vision blurring into focus as he looked around. He wasn’t sure how long he had ended up sleeping, but he forced himself, balance wobbly as he glanced out the window.  
  
He stilled, as he saw a group of men returning to the castle.  
  
Immediately, Yuu recalled what had happened during the night: how he had woken up to find his father in the infirmary with Marie, and how Izo had then left to look into something with General Tiedoll. Quickly, the flood of unease that had kept Yuu awake for so long returned, and he hurried from the window, rushing out of his bedroom to find out what had happened.  
  
The halls were unusually quiet – something that seemed odd. Usually the morning was bustling with some activity, but the air felt heavy and leaden. There were no maidservants to be seen, and the corridors felt unusually vast. Again, something unsettling simmered, nipping at Yuu’s nerves like pins and needles.  
  
He ignored it.  
  
He made it down to the ground level of the castle, near where the entrance hall was. Several guards were stationed, with one of them speaking to one of the commanders as they remained by the entryway. The doors had been opened, and people were outside, but as to why Yuu couldn’t think of a reason.  
  
As Yuu approached, the head guard caught sight of him. Alarm flickering in his eyes, he caught Yuu just as he tried to move past him. “Prince Yuu, wait-“  
  
Yuu frowned, and quickly slid from the guard’s grasp before he could catch him. He ran out the front entrance where the group of men remained – the guards who had ventured out the previous night.  
  
Gradually, Yuu slowed to a stop. The men had returned walking alongside their horses, with a board having been connected between two of the horses to carry something.  
  
Tiedoll turned. He had been with the guards, face drawn and eyes tired. Concern pooled in his expression as he caught sight of Yuu, and quickly approached him. “Yuu,” he began to say, as he placed a gentle hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Yuu, you should go back inside-“  
  
Yuu frowned, and pulled his shoulder back. Although Tiedoll was being gentle, it only unnerved Yuu – especially since the guards had also tried to keep him from coming outside. Ignoring Tiedoll, Yuu looked around. His father had been out too, but Yuu didn’t see him.  
  
“Yuu,” Tiedoll tried again, this time his tone a little firmer. “Yuu, I really need you to go inside.”  
  
“Where’s my father?” Yuu asked, still looking for Izo.  
  
Tiedoll hesitated, a pained look flickering across his expression. He opened his mouth to speak, but Yuu was too distracted, as he caught sight of the guards moving whatever it was the horses were carrying, a cloth covering it.  
  
As the horses moved, the cloth shifted, Yuu catching sight of what was underneath. His throat dried.  
  
A body. His father’s body.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The woods were cool despite it being morning. The frost had lessened, shifting to droplets of dew that clung to the grass, the earth blanketed with moss as trees gnarled into spirals. The air was quiet, a gentle tranquility hanging in the air as streams of sunlight spilled through the leaves, illuminating what had previously been a maze of darkness, the woods bright and peaceful.  
  
Deep in the forest, the lake remained. It was still, the waters calm as the sunlight glittered off the surface, iridescent and shining. The surface rippled gently as a few swans swam by, their movements smooth as they remained close to one another, quiet and protective.  
  
Along the edge of the lake, a girl remained. She was small, with dark skin and short, wild hair the color of inky plums, wearing a white dress that hung loosely on her body, the skirt lined with feathers of white.  
  
Softly, the girl hummed. She tossed a few breadcrumbs onto the lake, near where the swans were.  
  
From behind, a young man walked up – a young man with platinum hair, and a third eye. He sat down beside the girl, sighing heavily. “That was annoying…”  
  
The girl’s lips quirked upward. “Was it?” she asked, glancing back at the young man. Her amber eyes gleamed brightly. “I thought it worked out. Didn’t you, Wisely?”  
  
Wisely crinkled his nose, and shrugged. “Only partially,” he mumbled. “We didn’t even get the innocence, Road…”  
  
Road laughed gently. “We didn’t – and that was a failure. But we killed a king.” She glanced back at the water, gaze distant. “I’m so tired of them. All of them…”  
  
“They’re tired of each other.” Wisely shifted, as he rested his elbow on his knee. He closed his eyes in contemplation. “Even if they don’t acknowledge it. They already resent each other. Humans always do.”  
  
Another smile stretched onto Road’s lips. “That exorcist resented them,” she pointed out. “He turned so quickly, though – made him terribly hard to control.”  
  
Wisely snorted. “It never works out right. They either turn too fast, or crumble to dust. Lord Millennium will be aggravated to hear about this.”  
  
“Oh, I don’t think so.” Road leaned back, her palms digging into the soft earth as he threw her head back. “He’ll understand. It just takes time.”  
  
Scoffing, Wisely looked off to the side. “Time…”  
  
Road didn’t say anything else. The sunlight felt warm against her skin, soothing and lulling. It felt absolutely divine to bask in that warmth, to close her eyes and listen to the gentle rippling of water.  
  
Soon. Soon, everything would fall into place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! This is the new fic! X3
> 
> I had gone back and forth for a while about this story, and honestly, I wasn’t even sure if I’d ever get this far to posting it. It’s an idea I’ve had for a while, the story being _loosely_ based off the plot of the ballet, Swan Lake. It won’t be a direct retelling by any means, but it’s a storyline I’ve wanted to adapt for several years now (the story itself has undergone three different plots/scenarios, and this final version is the one I felt would work best). You definitely don’t have to be familiar with the ballet by any means to enjoy this, but it’s a tale that’s near and dear to my heart, and I always recommend looking into it. ;3 
> 
> (Which - some people may be more familiar with the animated film, The Swan Princess, which is essentially a Swan Lake retelling.)
> 
> Despite how much I love the ballet and am already growing to love this story, it definitely has had its challenges. The number one thing being characterization, and adapting characters to this particular AU. Hopefully moving forward, the characters will feel true to themselves despite being adapted into these new roles (Kanda in particular has been one of the hardest - as handsome as he is, his mannerisms don’t make for him being the best prince).
> 
> As of now, I am 11 chapters into this story - so it’s not finished, but I’m far enough along that I’m confident I can finish it (although I’m not sure how many chapters it will be?). I do want to say that I will not being doing weekly updates as I have in the past - due to the pandemic and its impact, I don’t want to rush updates and I know a lot of us are maxed out with our bandwidth. So the updates will be more sporadic with this story (please feel free to leave comments - that helps me to keep track of how much people are reading, and is also good incentive to stay focused on writing during this time!).
> 
> This is, of course, only the prologue (though it’s really like chapter one in terms of length - but since it takes place 10 years before the rest of the story, I like to have that distinction). We do get to see little Kanda here and his father, Izo (who, if you’ve read Lotus in the Snow, will recognize him from that where he’s Kanda’s father there as well), but I promise it’ll get more exciting as the chapters progress. Regardless, I’m hoping people enjoy the setup. ;3 
> 
> This is a Yulma fic, so they will be the primary focus - but as you can see with the tags there will be some hints of Laven, and possibly another pairing to come. >.>
> 
> That’s a bit of a monster note, but needless to say, I really hope you enjoy this story. <3


	2. Smoke in the North

The summers in Ilveria were mild, the skies cloudless and the air clear. Spring always seemed to stretch on for an eternity, melting into the warmth of summer as the flowers remained fully in bloom and sweet. It was no surprise that the kingdom was known for its lush greenery and lavish displays of nature; Ilveria was encompassed by a dense forest, with just enough open space for farming and raising livestock on the kingdom’s outskirts. The land was fertile, with many lakes cutting through it; with the mild temperament, it was an ideal place for any population to thrive in.  
  
Lavi looked out the carriage window, his one emerald eye scanning the surroundings. Although it was not his first time in Ilveria, he always liked to take in the sights. The kingdom could almost be described as idyllic; the citizens appeared happy as they went about their business, the weather was pleasant. It was nearly enough to distract Lavi from his own periodic cynicism, the reason for his visit threatening to dissipate into the backdrop of his thoughts.  
  
Bookman had no trouble reminding him.  
  
“Get your head back inside the carriage before you lose it,” Bookman clipped. “You’re acting like you’ve never been here before.”  
  
Lavi snickered, amused at the old man’s chiding. He pulled back from the window, leaning into his seat as he stretched his long arms behind his head. “Let me live a little, Gramps, and take in the scenery. It wouldn’t kill you to do the same.”  
  
Bookman huffed. His eyes were dark and hollow, bags heavy as a small scowl remained on his face. “Just remember why we’re here – this isn’t a holiday.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah – I’ll remember.” Lavi waved off Bookman, dismissing the old man’s reminder. “Do a preliminary check before the exorcist examination. It’ll be _fine_.”  
  
“Hmph. It’s more than that,” Bookman grumbled. His attention shifted to the other window, as they passed several trees along the path, the leaves vibrantly green. “We need to inform the queen regent of what’s happened in the other kingdoms, and let the prince know. This will change how things are handled following the examination.”  
  
As Bookman said this, Lavi cringed. “Right.” He rubbed the back of his neck, expression turning contemplative. “Kanda will be pretty pissed about that….”  
  
“Show some respect and address him properly, you brat.”  
  
“We’re on good terms – he doesn’t mind what I call him,” Lavi said, before pausing. “Well, maybe sometimes he does. But that’s just him being a moody – _ow_!”  
  
Bookman stared at Lavi, expression deadpan. He had just chucked a pen at the redhead with an unprecedented force, the younger man rubbing his scalp as he moaned. “Next time, I’ll kick you out of this carriage.”  
  
“Sheesh…alright, alright. Just don’t hit me again,” Lavi mumbled.   
  
The carriage ride fell into silence after that, Bookman leaving Lavi alone for the remaining duration of the journey. Inevitably, Lavi’s attention returned to the window, his thoughts turning as the Ilverian castle came into view, the walls white and carved of smooth marble.  
  
They would reach their destination soon.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
_Blast._  
  
An explosive force rammed into Kanda’s body, knocking him back as though a ton of bricks had just been thrown into him. He grunted, digging his heels into the ground as he skidded back, barely managing to hold his balance. Smoke clouded around him, momentarily obscuring his vision; he quickly focused, sword in hand as he readied an attack on his opponent.  
  
Tiedoll watched. He stood on the sidelines as the training session continued, with both young men doing well to hold up their own.  
  
A second man approached where the general was, tall and broad shouldered. He angled his face toward where the fight took place, his unnaturally pale and blank, the pupils faded – a result of blindness. “Sounds like they’re both giving it their all.”  
  
Tiedoll hummed thoughtfully. “They are, though Kanda seems to be really throwing himself into his attacks. I think Daisya is breaking a sweat,” he said, glancing at the other man. “I’m sure you were already picking up on that, Marie.”  
  
Marie nodded, as he brought a hand to the ear coverings he wore. “He’s swinging Mugen a lot harder than normal,” he murmured before he quieted at the sound of the fight continuing.   
  
Sword illuminating, Kanda charged forward. He swung his blade, several pale, ghostly insects flying from it as they attacked.  
  
The smoke began to clear, just as Daisya spotted the insects. Cursing, he took his anti-akuma weapon – a metallic ball – and kicked it, yellow sparks flying as it cut through Kanda’s attack.   
  
Kanda wasn’t fazed. He gripped his sword, the blade once more illuminating as he pulled at it with his other hand, tearing out a second blade of light. Quickly, he crossed them, slamming the blades together as a heavy blast slammed into Daisya, knocking him all the way back toward the outskirts of the training room’s arena.   
  
He slammed into an invisible force – the air rippling as a seal illuminated on the ground. Groaning, Daisya fell to the ground, his hood having fallen down as his spiky brown hair remained in a disarray. “Ugh…damn…”  
  
Kanda stopped, his second sword dissipating back into light as it returned to his original blade. Sweat clung to his skin, breaths heavy as he caught himself. His hair was a complete mess, strands falling out from his ponytail as he walked over to where Daisya was, who had already pushed himself back onto his feet.  
  
“I know I always tell you not to hold back, but I think you almost cracked my skull just now,” Daisya mumbled as he rubbed his head.   
  
Kanda scoffed. “You’re fine. It’s not like I was going to kill you.”  
  
Daisya chuckled, swiftly recovering. “Arrogant, much? I could still kick your ass, if you weren’t royalty.”  
  
As soon as the words were spoken, Kanda’s gaze turned scalding. “If you were fucking holding _back_ -“  
  
“I’m kidding, I’m kidding – calm down or you’ll bust a vein.” Daisya waved his hand dismissively, before he walked over to get his weapon. He kicked the metallic ball up – _Charity Bell_ \- and caught it as he turned back to Kanda. “But really – you seem way testier than normal today.”  
  
Kanda exhaled. He didn’t respond, instead glancing around the training room. It was a vast space, located in the lower south wing of the castle. The ceilings stretched high, held up by ribbed vaulting as column reliefs lined the walls; they were smooth and bare, the space acting as a large, rectangular arena. On the ground, glyphs and markings remained, acting as buffers to keep any attacks from damaging the space.  
  
Daisya watched, as Kanda left the arena, the invisible buffers dissolving. His brow raised as the other exorcist stalked off, the air around him tense and moody. _‘Huh.’_  
  
Kanda didn’t look back, as he sheathed his sword onto his belt. He remained quiet, even as he passed both Tiedoll and Marie. On a nearby bench, he grabbed his overshirt, before exiting the training room.  
  
Daisya stopped, just as he reached where Tiedoll and Marie were. Still perplexed, he turned to them. “What’s up with him? He’s acting crabbier than normal.”  
  
Tiedoll paused. He didn’t speak at first, his gaze somewhat contemplative. “I’ll go see.”  
  
Daisya frowned, watching as Tiedoll also exited the training room. He looked over at Marie. “You think something’s up?”  
  
Marie thought before answering calmly. “I think he’s worried about the examination.”  
  
Daisya blinked, crossing his arms. “Never took him to be nervous…but I guess that makes sense. The first one is always the worst.” He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. “He’ll be fine though. I did mine two years ago and it was a breeze. Besides, we all have to go through it too – the royals are going to want to make sure we can all kick ass.”  
  
A small frown tugged at Marie’s lips. “It’s more than that, though,” he pointed out softly. “Kanda’s a prince and the standards for his performance will be different.”  
  
“Oh. Shit, that’s right,” Daisya realized, as he rubbed the back of his head. “I forgot about that…”  
  
Marie nodded. “It’s coming up soon, too. I imagine he’s probably going to be high strung for a bit.”  
  
“Yeah.” Daisya frowned, expression turning thoughtful. “I’ll have to really up my game next time I train with him…thought he was going to pummel me today…”  
  
Marie’s lips quirked upward. “You’ll be fine. He’d never go that far.”  
  
Daisya snorted. “That’s what you think.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The inner courtyard was a peaceful and somewhat concealed area, hidden from the busyness that filled the inside of the castle walls. Gardens lined the pathways, the flowers sweet and tended to daily. A few cherry blossom trees even remained, though their blossoms had long since fallen in early spring, the leaves now a deep, vibrant green.  
  
Kanda didn’t pay them any mind, the gardens or the trees. He had decided to cut through the courtyard, pace brisk. He wasn’t sure what had happened after training with Daisya, but he had the sudden need for air afterwards – for air and for some silence.  
  
He paused, stopping midway through the grounds. His dark blue eyes briefly scanned the area; the courtyard wasn’t really busy. In fact, there wasn’t really anyone outside. He spied a few groundskeepers near the south end, but aside from that, it was empty. A small bit of relief overcame Kanda – maybe he’d find a spot to meditate. The groundskeepers wouldn’t bother him.  
  
“Kanda.”  
  
Kanda exhaled heavily, the voice slicing through his thoughts. Already, the peace he had begun to feel started to evaporate, and for a fleeting moment, he considered moving on as though he hadn’t heard anything. But, having recognized the speaker he knew such wouldn’t be easy.  
  
Turning, Kanda frowned at the exorcist general. “What?”  
  
Tiedoll walked up to Kanda. “Can I join you?”  
  
Kanda’s frown remained, but he didn’t argue. Even if he did, Tiedoll could be persistent when he felt the need. Wordlessly, he started walking again.  
  
Tiedoll continued alongside Kanda. At first, the general said nothing. He kept quiet, attention flickering to the gardens around them. “It’s a really lovely day out. The groundskeepers always do such a fine job of managing everything.”  
  
Kanda fought the urge to roll his eyes. Was this why Tiedoll had bothered to come find him? “You didn’t seriously come to talk about the flowers…”  
  
Tiedoll smiled. “No,” he said, as he glanced at Kanda. “But it worked as a way to get you to start talking a little.”  
  
Kanda’s ears burned, and he averted his gaze.   
  
A beat passed and Tiedoll continued. “I noticed how hard you were training today. I don’t think I’ve seen you push yourself like that before.” His gaze shifted to Kanda, his tone softening. “The examination is coming up soon…”  
  
Somewhat abruptly, Kanda tensed. It was as though someone had pinched a nerve, but he bit his tongue and kept quiet. He didn’t want to talk about this now.  
  
Concern flickered in Tiedoll’s eyes. Kanda’s rigidness didn’t go unnoticed, and he sighed. “It is perfectly normal to be nervous, Yuu. There’s no shame in that.”  
  
Kanda stopped walking. He hadn’t missed the shift in the general’s tone, nor the slip of his birth name being used. It wasn’t often people called him that, unless it was a formal situation or his aunt.   
  
Despite this, he stubbornly avoided eye contact.   
  
“You’ve trained well. Regardless of what happens, you should be proud of that.”  
  
Kanda’s brow knitted together, a bitter taste rising into the back of his throat. Although Tiedoll may have intended to be reassuring, his words did hardly anything of the sort – Kanda wouldn’t have any pride if he didn’t make it through the examination. And people talking about it repeatedly wasn’t exactly helping the situation.  
  
Silence looming, Tiedoll once more broke it. “All examination talk aside, I also wanted to make sure you remembered that there is a meeting with the advisors in the court today. Your aunt expects you to be there.”  
  
Kanda grimaced, the shift in topic more jarring than not. Expression twisting into annoyance, he looked back at Tiedoll irritably. “Why? I already got dragged to a stupid meeting yesterday-“  
  
“That was over _trade_ – this one is dealing with taxes.” He sighed. “You know that you’ll need to be skilled in more than exorcism and combat to take over the throne – and while it pains me to say it, your skills in diplomacy and economics could use some sharpening.”  
  
Brow furrowing, Kanda’s lips pressed into a thin line. “It’s not my fault everyone wastes time talking about pointless crap.”  
  
“It’s not pointless and you know it.” Tiedoll smiled softly, despite his chiding. “I know those meetings can be dry, but they’re important. Especially for you.”  
  
Kanda huffed quietly. Tiedoll’s reminder had at most been aggravating, but at the same time he knew there was a grain of truth to the statement. Kanda _hated_ diplomacy, and it was frankly the bane of his existence. If things had been up to him, he would have had a life where he didn’t have to even deal with it. Such matters, although necessary, were tedious and boring. Meetings with advisors stretched on far too long, and the conversation was drab. Kanda just felt so stagnant when dealing with them. And useless.  
  
Sometimes, thinking about how he’d had to deal with it for the rest of his life was maddening.  
  
Gently, Tiedoll placed a hand on Kanda’s shoulder. “You should get ready – that meeting starts in an hour.”  
  
Kanda’s nose scrunched up, a soured look on his face. “Great…”  
  
Tiedoll smiled. “I’ll see you later, then.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything, as Tiedoll turned to head back near the south wing of the castle. The general’s footsteps soon faded into nothing and only the sound of the tree branches gently rustling in the breeze reached Kanda’s ears.  
  
He didn’t move at first, the air strangely quiet around him. It was somewhat rare; usually in the courtyard others were present, whether it was a servant or groundskeeper. But when Kanda looked, the groundskeepers he had seen earlier had gone off – and for a few rare seconds, Kanda was alone and felt like he could breathe.  
  
Exhaling, his hand reached to the hilt of his sword. Fingers brushing against the cool metal, he gripped it and left the courtyard.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The meeting hall was spacious. It wasn’t as vast as the great hall, where the thrones remained, but the ceiling was high and the windows narrow, warm sunlight spilling through the glass, the polished, mahogany table bright and smooth under its rays. It was long and rectangular, with seven seats on each side of the table – most of which were occupied by advisors.  
  
The advisors were an array of nobles of the court, most middle aged or older, dressed in finely made, yet modest clothing. They wore warm shades of burgundy and russet. Rich tones, yet neutral.  
  
At the head of the table, the queen regent sat. She was a striking woman with long dark hair and porcelain skin, dressed in silk fabrics the color of dark pink roses and magenta, eyes sharp as she gazed at the advisors.  
  
Anita listened, as one of the advisors spoke. “We should at least raise taxes by five percent – right now there is enough prosperity with trade that we can impose it. It would be beneficial to store those funds in cases of emergencies.”  
  
“Five percent is too steep – do it by two,” another advisor countered. “This will give people time to adjust.”  
  
Anita didn’t say anything, as she observed the exchange for a few moments. The advisors continued on, debating over what the tax rate should be adjusted to. Gently, Anita exhaled; it was not uncommon for the advisors to gently bicker amongst themselves, and by now, she was well used to it.  
  
In the corner of her eye, Anita saw a shift. She looked, catching sight of Kanda. The prince had his arms crossed, slightly slouched gaze averted; he looked thoroughly bored, and even a bit annoyed.   
  
While the advisors were occupied in their own discussion, Anita spoke, tone soft yet firm. “Yuu.”  
  
Kanda blinked, looking over.  
  
“Please sit up straight.”  
  
Kanda’s lips tugged into a frown. He released a slightly agitated breath before complying though, straightening his posture despite keeping his arms crossed.  
  
Anita didn’t say anything else, as she returned her focus back to the advisors. They were still debating on the two tax increase possibilities. Anita realized that they would likely go on a while if someone else didn’t step in. “Five percent is a steep increase – especially since we did an increase two years ago. Is there a reason two percent won’t be sufficient?”  
  
The first advisor paused. “Well – the two percent would technically be sufficient. But if something happens – a lack of crops or an attack – five would be more stabilizing.”  
  
Anita frowned. “I thought we had funds set aside for those situations already? Do you have those amounts?”  
  
The advisor hesitated. “Well, yes, and technically we are okay for the year-“  
  
“If we’re going to be okay for a year, then just keep the increase at two percent,” Kanda finally cut in. His tone was short, and somewhat impatient. “If something happens, raise it again in one year instead of two. It’s not like we’d have to wait.”  
  
The advisor turned quiet, somewhat contemplative. He exchanged glances with a few other advisors. “That…could work.”  
  
Anita spoke up. “We don’t have to have a final decision today – perhaps we should revisit where all funds are being allocated to in the next few days, and look at some theoretical scenarios in case anything unusual were to happen.”  
  
Nodding, the advisors agreed. “Should we move onto the next agenda item?”  
  
Anita paused. “Let’s continue this tomorrow – please be sure to have all reports ready and up to date so we can settle on a decision then.”  
  
The advisors murmured in agreement, the meeting coming to a close. Chairs scraped against the floors as the advisors stood, breaking off into smaller groups for discussion.  
  
Quickly, Kanda stood. He looked as though he were ready to bolt, before Anita spoke. “Yuu – don’t leave yet.”  
  
Kanda stilled. He exhaled quietly through his nose, turning back just as Anita stood.  
  
Anita walked over to Kanda. “Come with me.”  
  
Kanda fought the urge to groan. Even with how calm his aunt’s tone was, he recognized the firmness in it – the kind she used whenever she was about to scold him for something.  
  
Despite this, Kanda obliged, with him and Anita exiting the meeting hall. They stopped a few brief times, as Anita said goodbye to a few of the advisors; Kanda remained quiet the whole time, not bothering to engage. He didn’t really care to talk to the advisors; the nobles were stuffy, and they always got on his nerves.   
  
_‘So damn annoying…’_ Kanda thought, his attention shifting to one of the windows as he and Anita started down the corridor. Outside, the sky was bright, and Kanda felt a sudden compulsion to get out of the castle.  
  
Beside Kanda, Anita kept her focus ahead as they walked. “You really need to be wary of your tone,” she chided calmly. “It doesn’t make for good leadership to be short with the advisors.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. “They were going on about the same damn thing for almost an hour. It was pointless and a waste of time.”  
  
“They were looking at all options, and weighing pros and cons.” Anita sighed, as she turned toward Kanda. “You will need to be patient.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. This wasn’t the first time he had been critiqued over his tone and mannerisms and he was half-inclined to brush it off. However, he felt his aunt’s gaze on him before Anita continued.  
  
“Your suggestion wasn’t a bad one and could work well – you just need to refine your articulation.”   
  
Kanda snorted. “They know what I’m saying.”  
  
“ _Refine_ ,” Anita urged as she shook her head. “I know you’re capable of it. If you’d spend the same level of effort as you do on your exorcist training, then this could be something you’d have mastered already.”  
  
Kanda bristled, immediately turning defensive. “That’s _different_ -“  
  
“I’m not saying it’s bad that you’ve invested in exorcism,” Anita emphasized. “But you can’t rely on that alone – one day, you will be looked to as the leader of the kingdom and you have to be ready. That means taking the time to focus on other areas.”  
  
Kanda huffed and crossed his arms. He had lost count of how many times this topic had come up – of Kanda having to one day take over ruling the kingdom after Anita. His aunt had only been elevated to the role of regent until he was twenty-one, and her position wasn’t meant to be permanent. He had been told this ever since he was a child, that he would need to be _ready_. That he would have to be well-versed in everything from diplomacy to trade…  
  
Anita watched Kanda. Her expression softened a bit. “You’ll do well, Yuu. I know you will, but you just need to broaden your interests,” she explained. “ _Please_ , Yuu. You only have two years before your coronation – that isn’t much time.”  
  
The words pricked at Kanda like needles and he turned to Anita sharply. “It’s enough time-“  
  
“Yuu – please don’t argue with me,” Anita asked. She sighed, her dark eyes soft despite her exasperation. “I just want you to be prepared – it’s what your parents would want.”  
  
Kanda stilled, the mention of his parents more than enough to sober him. Any will to argue died almost immediately, stubbornness abated.   
  
Somewhat abruptly, Kanda broke eye contact.  
  
Anita released a breath, the air around them somewhat tense. “I have a few things I need to attend to,” she said, careful to keep her tone even. “Why don’t we talk more about this at dinner?”  
  
Kanda exhaled. “Fine.”  
  
Before Anita could say anything, footsteps echoed in the corridor. Both Kanda and Anita looked over, a guard approaching.  
  
Anita looked at the guard questioningly. “Yes?”  
  
“The two Bookmen just arrived,” the guard spoke. “They were brought in through the castle gates just a few minutes ago.”  
  
“I see – I’ll go to greet them,” Anita said. She turned to Kanda. “You should come, too – you’re friends with the younger Bookman, aren’t you?”  
  
“Hn.” A frown remained on Kanda’s face, arms still crossed. “He never shuts up.”  
  
“Yuu,” Anita warned. “I won’t force you, but only because I expect you’ll start _thinking_ about what we discussed.”  
  
Kanda’s jaw tightened. He was tempted to argue that they hadn’t discussed anything, and that Anita had only been scolding him – but considering the guard was present, he knew better.  
  
“I’ll see you tonight, then,” Anita said.  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything else, as his aunt took her leave with the guard. He turned, looking back out one of the windows in the corridor, which stretched high up, the warm sunlight spilling through. Outside, the sky remained cloudless, the castle gates visible as well as the city just beyond them. For a fleeting moment, he thought about running off – maybe going out of the city limits and somewhere far off to train, where no one could bother him.  
  
Quietly, Kanda scoffed, pushing the notion aside. Such a thought was nothing more than an illusion.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Lavi stretched his arms up as he got out of the carriage. Although the ride hadn’t been uncomfortable, his muscles were stiff and ached; sitting in an enclosed space for hours on end hadn’t done his body any favors.  
  
He sighed, a satisfying stretch pulling at his side as he leaned over. “Man, that ride took forever…”  
  
Bookman huffed as he also got out. “Don’t complain, brat. It was only a week’s worth of traveling.”  
  
“Ugh. A week is too much. I don’t care how nice the carriages are.”  
  
“Stop your whining.”  
  
Lavi ignored Bookman, instead taking the opportunity to look around. Their carriage had stopped just at the front entrance of the castle, the driver and a few footmen getting their belongings situated, the doors of the castle smooth and gilded in gold, leaf-like floral designs intricately tracing up the sides. Lavi’s eye inevitably wandered to them, his gaze scanning the carved, ivory details of the castle itself. It was always impossible to deny the elegance of Ilverian architecture; out of all the kingdoms, it had the most organic feel, taking much of its design and motif details from flowers and plant life. Even with the castle’s fortified elements, it had an almost ethereal feel – not like the heavy, stern grandeur of the castle back in Liorea, where the Bookman Clan was centralized.  
  
His gawking was soon cut short as two people exited out the front doors. The first was a tall, burly woman who held an imposing stature, but the second woman was smaller, and more regal – the queen regent, Lavi realized.  
  
Anita approached Bookman and Lavi, with Mahoja just behind her. “Bookman,” she greeted warmly. “I hope your travels were safe – we’re happy to welcome you here.”  
  
“They were – thank you.”  
  
“We’ve had two rooms prepared for you, if you would like to get settled in – I imagine you must be tired.”  
  
Lavi grinned. “Thanks! I could use a nap – _oof_!”  
  
“Don’t be dozing off until you have things situated,” Bookman said, having just jabbed Lavi’s side.  
  
Lavi frowned, as he rubbed his torso. “Okay, okay – just stop attacking me.”  
  
Bookman turned his attention away from Lavi, as he looked at Anita. “If I may have a word with you, Your Majesty – there’s something I need to discuss with you.”  
  
Anita’s gaze turned curious. She nodded her head. “Very well,” she agreed, before turning to Mahoja. “Mahoja – would you show the younger Bookman to his room?”  
  
“Of course.” Mahoja’s attention shifted to Lavi. “Follow me.”  
  
Lavi left after that, following the tall guard into the castle. As they disappeared, Anita looked back at Bookman. “I take it that whatever you need to speak about must be important to address it so suddenly…”  
  
“It is.” Bookman paused, his dark eyes shifting around them. A few guards were out in the open space between the gatehouse and castle entrance, and the footmen were still situating things with the carriage. “We should find somewhere private to speak.”  
  
Anita’s lips pressed together. While she didn’t disagree with the suggestion, the tone in which Bookman had spoken made her unsettled; she was not blind to the weight that lingered in his words.  
  
“Let’s find somewhere, then,” Anita said, before motioning for Bookman to follow her as she started inside.  
  
Bookman paused. Once more, his eyes scanned the area, the sky blue and the breeze gentle. Guards and castle servants went about their business, some mindlessly chattering in innocent bliss.  
  
Quietly, Bookman followed Anita.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“So, _this_ is where you came.”  
  
Kanda glared, as he looked up from the desk. He had taken refuge in the castle library, finding a small nook to hide in – or at least, one that he had _hoped_ to hide in. After his conversation with his aunt, Kanda had forced himself to find a place to study, pulling some texts over things like trade and the history of the different kingdoms. It was, needless to say, not something he had wanted to do and already Kanda had taken more effort than necessary to even try to get into the right mindset to delve into such materials.  
  
Daisya, however, was not helping.  
  
Casually, Daisya took one of the texts as he flipped through it. His expression immediately shifted into one of unease, as he set the book back down. “Yikes. Since when do you read this in your free time? Last I checked, even the advisors couldn’t get you to spend more than ten minutes focusing on this stuff.”  
  
Kanda sneered, swiping the book back. “Shut up.”  
  
Daisya leaned against the wall, the scent of old books lingering heavily in the air. The castle library was huge and easy to get lost in; shelves of books towered high, with the library itself being two stories. A large, spiraling staircase remained in the center, leading up to the second level. A few castle scholars remained up above, studying and reading through various documents in more nooks hidden from sight, while Kanda and Daisya remained on the ground level.  
  
“Seriously, what gives?” Daisya asked, eyebrow raised. “With how you acted earlier, this was the last place I expected to find you…usually you train more when you’re stressed.”  
  
Kanda looked up, gaze somewhat heated. “I’m not _stressed_.”  
  
Daisya snickered. “Sure, right. Whatever you want to say.” He picked up another text to flip through it. “Tiedoll mentioned you had some meeting or something – what, did it go badly?”  
  
“Tch. It was fine,” Kanda grumbled. He leaned with his elbow on the desk, as he tried to refocus.  
  
Daisya eyed Kanda for a moment. He noticed with intrigue that Kanda seemed especially intent on trying to read…whatever boring text it was. The sight was honestly peculiar; in all Daisya’s time of knowing the prince, he had never known Kanda to be studious.  
  
Daisya hummed as he pulled over a slightly rickety chair, the wooden legs scraping against the marble floor shrilly. He plopped down into it, kicking his legs up against the edge of the desk.  
  
“Let me guess – your aunt got onto you, didn’t she?”  
  
Kanda stopped reading. He exhaled, the sound tired and frustrated. “I want her to get off my back…” He paused, looking at one of the texts, and felt the overwhelming urge to throw the book at a wall.   
  
“Hey, she’s family – it’s her job to worry and critique,” Daisya pointed out. He paused, face turning somewhat contemplative. “And I mean…you do have a lot you have to prep for. You know, with being heir to the throne and ruling a whole kingdom. That’s serious pressure, man.”  
  
Kanda’s gaze darkened, as he glared at the other exorcist.   
  
Daisya noticed and backtracked. “I’m just saying!” He sat a bit more upright, expression oddly sober. “Look, what I’m saying is it’s a lot – don’t break your head over it, okay?”  
  
Kanda huffed as he ran his hand through his bangs. As aggravating as Daisya could be, he knew the exorcist meant well – though it did little to help his otherwise mounting stress over everything. “This shit is just so fucking irritating…”  
  
“Well, look who’s here!”  
  
The voice broke through the otherwise silent air and Kanda winced. He bit back an aggravated groan as he recognized the voice, his head falling onto the desk.  
  
Daisya looked up, smile broadening as he recognized the redhead. “Hey, it’s the Bookman – long time, no see.”  
  
Lavi walked over. “Didn’t think I’d run into you two here of all places,” he said before looking at Kanda, who still had his head down. “Hey, aren’t you happy to see me? I’d have thought you missed me considering it’s been six months.”  
  
“No.”  
  
Daisya snickered, his dark eyes flashing to Lavi. “Watch out. He’s been in a bit of a foul mood all day.”  
  
“Does that ever change?” Lavi looked around, intrigue flickering across his face as he noticed the texts on the desk. “Huh, someone’s doing some heavy reading…”  
  
“Kanda’s trying to be a good prince and actually study for once,” Daisya said while earning a scathing look from Kanda.  
  
“What!? No way.” Lavi grinned, his green eye sparkling vibrantly. “Well, you’re in luck – I’m a whiz at this stuff, and can totally help-“  
  
“No _fucking way_ ,” Kanda hissed as he glowered at both Lavi and Daisya. On a good day, he could deal with one of them – but having both grate on his nerves while attempting to focus would only give him a splitting headache. “Don’t you have shit to do somewhere else?”  
  
Lavi shrugged. “Technically – but I work fast,” he said. “Anyways, Gramps will be preoccupied for a bit – he’s meeting with Queen Anita now.”  
  
“What for?” Daisya asked.  
  
Lavi paused. For a fleeting second, his conversational demeanor lessened, as something strange flickered in his one visible eye. He quickly contained it though, keeping his tone light and even. “Ah, you know. He had some things to report from Liorea. And then he wanted to talk about the exorcist examination…”  
  
As Lavi said this, Kanda looked up, previous agitation abated. He frowned, expression suspicious. “What about it?”  
  
“Some preliminary check-ins. You know, sort of like what we did last year when Daisya got evaluated, ” Lavi explained. “There’s going to be another official to come from Liorea to observe everything – have to say, he’s a piece of work. I’m sure it’ll be a blast having him here.”  
  
Daisya raised an eyebrow. “Who is it?”  
  
Lavi hummed. “Legory Peck? He’s one of the dukes back in Liorea and cousin to the king. He’s pretty involved with the Black Order, so he’s been monitoring a few exorcists in other kingdoms.”  
  
Kanda’s frown remained. What Lavi said came as no real surprise; it was standard that a noble would come to monitor and observe the biannual exorcist examination. All kingdoms had to go through it with their exorcists, who were employed in units for each kingdom, though the kingdom of Liorea seemed to always be at the center of such workings. Especially being that it was where the Black Order was centralized: an organization composed of high-ranking nobility, who dedicated themselves to ensuring the protection of all kingdoms through the usage of weaponized magic known as innocence.  
  
The exorcists wielded this magic.  
  
Kanda sighed, his elbow resting on the desk. The way innocence worked wasn’t exactly well understood – it was a finicky magic that was only compatible with certain individuals. But Kanda had been determined to be compatible with it several years ago, just three years after…  
  
 _A body. The guards had carried back a body…  
  
It couldn’t have been him though. No – no, Yuu had just seen him the night before…  
  
It couldn’t have been…  
_  
The memory skidded through his thoughts, and Kanda turned his face away. He looked over at the thin window in the study nook, the landscape stretching on as the forest loomed just beyond the city limits, Lavi and Daisya’s conversation drowning into a mere hum in his ears.  
  
In the distance, there was a flash – almost like a spark of light. It disappeared quickly, but not before something else appeared at the edge of the forest.  
  
Smoke.  
  
Alarm filled Kanda, and at the same time, Daisya took notice of the sight, eyes wide. “Is that-?”  
  
Kanda stood abruptly, not even bothering to say anything before taking off, leaving both Lavi and Daisya behind. He hurried out of the library, eyes scanning the corridor before he started off near where the main castle entrance was, his pace quick.  
  
By the time Kanda made it there, several guards had already congregated just outside the front. Among them was Tiedoll, expression far more serious than normal.  
  
Kanda approached, several guards dispersing just as he caught up to the exorcist general. “What happened?” he asked. “There’s smoke just north of here-“  
  
Tiedoll turned. “I know – we just saw it,” he said. “We aren’t sure what caused it, but we’re going out to see what it is.”  
  
“I’ll come,” Kanda said.  
  
Tiedoll paused, a wave of hesitation befalling him.. “Kanda, I’m not sure if you should-“  
  
“I said I’ll _come_.” Kanda’s tone remained firm, his stance unyielding. “I’m not going to just stay and wait to hear about what it is.”  
  
Tiedoll sighed. “I should have known…” he murmured. “Alright, then. Marie is coming, too, and the guards are getting the horses ready.”  
  
Kanda nodded, as Tiedoll went to speak to another guard. As he did, Kanda turned to where he could see a wisp of dark smoke seeping into the sky in the north.  
  
Whatever it was, Kanda would make sure it was dealt with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday! (Or Tuesday? It’s 10PM my time and I’m pushing it. XD)
> 
> I had meant to post this over the weekend, but ended up in an editing frenzy. As of now, I’ve finished chapter 12, and went through chapters 6-12 to refine and rewrite some things. Needless to say, I’m feeling much more solid about where I’m at, and am crossing my fingers I’ll be starting chapter 13 soon. (I’m estimating...25 chapters possibly? Rough estimate, ballpark there. Could be more, could be less depending on how things go.)
> 
> I also wanted to get this second chapter posted, since the prologue/first chapter didn’t quite get into the story yet - and really, these first few chapters will be a lot of heavy set up (though next chapter, it picks up a bit!). It always takes me a bit to really situate the characters into these new roles and re-establish relationships - with one of the biggest examples here being Kanda and Anita.
> 
> Normally, I make Kanda related to Tiedoll - or at least, have more emphasis on that relationship (and they definitely have a particular relationship here that still touches on that closeness). But again, I’m taking a lot of inspiration from Swan Lake, and for those who are familiar with that story you’ll probably recall that the Queen (Prince Siegfried’s mother) is a major character and driving force at times. I definitely wanted to echo that here, though I made the change of making Anita into Kanda’s aunt. It felt a bit better for that dynamic, and hopefully it makes more sense as the story moves on. 
> 
> I really enjoy fleshing out these relationships though, as well as setting this up. In some ways, it’s felt a bit like revisiting my old fics (Encompassed in Glass, Lotus in the Snow, The Chime of a Crystalline Flower) since this story sort of takes elements from all three of those and shifts them around. I guess this fic could be a culmination of that? XD
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Please do leave comments/feedback, and help me stay motivated to keep writing! I don’t want this flame to die. X3


	3. A Plea for Death

It didn’t take long for them to reach the northern outskirts of the forest. Immediately after the smoke had been spotted, the Ilverian exorcists departed, with several guards in tow. They rode out on horseback, cutting through the city until they reached the edge of it, open fields stretched wide beneath the sky. Not far off, the forest remained, thick and dense. A road led through it, eventually acting as a route to the neighboring kingdom of Liorea, but the rest of the forest was heavily shrouded.  
  
Just beyond some of the trees, the smoke could be seen: a dark wisp rising before it dispersed into a veil of gray in the sky.  
  
Tiedoll pulled the reins on his horse, glancing back at the others. “We should continue on foot from here – tie up the horses.”  
  
The rest of the party complied, the guards situating the horses before they tied them to several trees on the edge of the woods.  
  
Kanda got off his horse, glancing around. Aside from the smoke, the air was quiet and calm; they had gotten far enough from the city that even the hum of the townspeople had faded away, the sound of their steps soft thuds against the earth.  
  
Silently, Kanda recalled the flash he had seen earlier. _‘What was it?’_  
  
Tiedoll looked over, his attention landing on Marie. “Can you hear anything?”  
  
Marie paused. He had already tied up his horse, having approached the forest. A small frown tugged at his lips, as he held the ear coverings he wore. After a moment, he shook his head and angled his face toward Tiedoll. “Nothing out of the ordinary. It’s quiet.”  
  
Tiedoll’s expression remained pensive. “I see,” he said. “We can track where the smoke is coming from – we’ll just have to be on guard.”  
  
The group started into the woods after that, with a few of the guards spreading out to cover more ground. Since the smoke was coming from more the northwest area, they inevitably strayed away from the main road, venturing onto uneven ground with damp soil and gnarled roots.  
  
Kanda’s eyes remained alert, gaze sharp as he scanned his surroundings. The scent of wet moss tickled his nose, kissed by the sweet wildflowers that twisted across the earth. Their vibrant colors remained darkened by the shade of the treetops, the heavy silence of the forest looming around them.  
  
 _‘It’s really quiet,’_ Kanda thought, his hand naturally gravitating toward the hilt of his sword. Even the regular chirping of the birds had diminished.  
  
As Kanda continued on, something flickered in the corner of his eye. He turned swiftly.  
  
Marie turned his face, his sensitive ears having picked up on Kanda’s movement. “Something wrong?”  
  
Kanda paused. He waited a second, his gaze locked on where he had seen the movement – just behind some thick oak trees. However, nothing else shifted, and he exhaled. “It’s nothing.”  
  
Marie nodded and continued on with the other guards.  
  
As the rest of the party continued, Tiedoll stopped. He looked back, noticing that Kanda hadn’t moved, his attention still lingering elsewhere. “Kanda,” he said, as he approached him. “You shouldn’t wander – not here.”  
  
Kanda’s head whipped back, the almost paternal tone nipping at his nerves. He scowled in distaste. “I’m not a kid.”  
  
“I know – but you’re a _prince_ ,” Tiedoll reminded him. “You must exercise caution in situations like this.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. “I’m cautious enough.”  
  
“Kanda.” Tiedoll sighed as he shook his head. “You know what I mean – we can’t let anything happen to you while you’re out here, even if you are an exorcist.”  
  
Kanda’s expression twisted into annoyance. “I can defend myself-“  
  
“I never said you couldn’t,” Tiedoll spoke. “That’s why you’re here. You’re more than capable – I’ve watched you train. But you’re still the only heir to the throne.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything, the words nothing he hadn’t heard before. A bit aggravated, he exhaled, silently wishing that for one day people would stop saying such things to him. He didn’t need a reminder.  
  
“It’s over here!”  
  
Both Kanda and Tiedoll turned before they hurried over to where the rest of the party had gone, making their way through the dense wood until they reached the others, who had gathered in what appeared to be a clearing. Somewhat forcefully, Kanda moved past some of the guards, his gaze flickering over the earth to see what it was-  
  
Scorch marks.  
  
They cut into the earth, the once green grass blackened and charred. Smoke sizzled, the fumes still thinning out as they danced upward, seeping from the markings that branded themselves into the ground: _pentacles_.  
  
Recognition filled Kanda’s eyes. _‘It’s…’_  
  
Tiedoll pushed through, his attention also landing on the scorch marks. Expression turning severe, he spoke. “Everyone get back-“  
  
The guards complied as both Tiedoll and Marie kneeling beside the scorch marks. Carefully, Marie placed his gloved hand onto the ground, his other hand adjusting his headphones.  
  
“Do you hear anything?” Tiedoll asked.  
  
Marie shook his head. “No. But I can feel the heat from the scorch marks in the ground.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded, standing as he looked back toward the others. “It’s from an akuma – one that still may be around. We need to see if we can locate where it is before it does any more damage.”  
  
One guard spoke up, somewhat nervous. “Can…can you tell what kind it is?”  
  
Kanda scoffed under his breath. “You can’t exactly tell by the scorch marks…”  
  
Tiedoll addressed the guard. “It’s never easy to say, unfortunately. But let’s split into two groups – that will allow us to cover more ground and see if we can find anything else.”  
  
They divided after that, three guards going off in one direction with Marie, while Kanda and Tiedoll left with the other two. They wandered deeper into the forest, eyes scanning the area for any signs of movement. Another scorch mark. A flicker of a shadow. _Anything_. Anything to signify that the akuma may have still been around.  
  
Akuma were dangerous – monsters that periodically crept from the depths of some terrible, dark place. No one knew for certain where they came from, or how _exactly_ they were created. But they appeared from time to time, usually in the shadows like hellish demons, tormenting whatever unfortunate living creature was nearby. They had no sense of remorse, or mercy; they were vicious and animalistic.  
  
Innocence was the only way to kill them.  
  
Kanda remained cautious, his fingertips once more dancing on the hilt of his sword – his innocence. Mugen felt cool against his touch, though the anti-akuma weapon pulsated with energy.  
  
In the shadows of the forest, Kanda saw something move – a silhouette.  
  
He stiffened, attention zoning in on the area; whatever had moved had been quick, and swiftly hidden itself from sight. Lowly, Kanda spoke. “Tiedoll.”  
  
Tiedoll glanced over, having been just a few feet away. “Hm?”  
  
Kanda nodded toward the trees up ahead.  
  
Quick to understand, Tiedoll activated his innocence: a rod-like weapon that appeared to be carved of white stone, and a wooden cross. Turning back to the remaining guards, Tiedoll signaled for them to wait.  
  
Kanda and Tiedoll continued, cautious in their approach. They remained on guard as they slowly rounded the trees…  
  
Nothing was there.  
  
Tiedoll’s shoulders relaxed, but he kept his hold on his weapon firm. His gaze flickered to Kanda curiously. “Do you think it could have been an animal?”  
  
Kanda frowned. The truth was, he wasn’t sure _what_ he had seen – it had looked like a dark shadow, running quickly. He didn’t think it had been an animal though. Not like a deer, or a boar…  
  
Exhaling, Kanda placed a hand on his hip. “I don’t fucking know.” His hand continued to grip at the hilt of his sword. He realized he thought he had seen something earlier, but a small part of him wondered if he was imagining it. “Something…”  
  
“Let’s look a bit longer,” Tiedoll said. “Marie and the others may have found something-“  
  
A blast cut Tiedoll off, the impact shaking the ground as he and Kanda staggered to keep their balance. The guards shouted from behind, the sound of wood splintering as branches fell to the earth, a cloud of smog engulfing the group.  
  
Kanda withdrew Mugen, the blade of the sword gleaming as he searched through the smoke, looking for whatever it was that had attacked. However, the smoke lingered, with Kanda only able to make out the silhouettes of the two guards and Tiedoll.  
  
A screech pierced the air. Tiedoll pulled Kanda down, ducking as something swooped down from above, the sound of large wings flapping overhead. A strong gust of wind beat down onto their bodies, the smoke blowing through the trees as the branches above rustled, with more threatening to snap.  
  
Kanda shut his eyes, if only to keep dirt and debris from blinding him. His jaw clenched, as he was overtaken by the urge to run – to _act_. However, he was stopped as Tiedoll kept a hand on his back, keeping him low on the ground. “Stay down-!“  
  
Another screech drowned out Tiedoll’s voice, the sound so shrill and horrific that Kanda swore his ears were close to bleeding. He grimaced, taking Mugen as he looked up, trying to catch sight of what the creature was-  
  
His eyes widened just as the creature dived down toward them.  
  
Kanda and Tiedoll split, pushing away just as the beast swooped down, stopping just above them as it turned: a large, vicious looking akuma with bat-like wings. Its body was dark and inky, with strangely bright markings marring its appearance. The body was something of a cross between an animal and a person, appendages knobby and haunches that crossed between that of a wolf and a bird.  
  
But, its face…its face was the most disturbing. It looked human, almost. It held the likeness of a man’s face, like a ghostly impression. Its ears were pointed though, and nose flat – but the eyes, though hollow, were pale. A silvery blue that appeared translucent in the light.  
  
Quickly, Tiedoll took his weapon, slamming the cross and rod together and into the ground. The earth illuminated, several ivory trees spiraling up as they entrapped the akuma in a cage, the creature screaming.  
  
Kanda whipped his head back to Tiedoll. “Can you hold it!?”  
  
Tiedoll didn’t say anything, as he tried to focus, with more ivory branches looping over the akuma. The monster struggled, its wings beating against the branches before they _cracked_ , the akuma breaking from its confines as it flew down, attacking the two guards. The men dived out of the way, swords in hand as they avoided the creature’s attack-  
  
Kanda didn’t wait. As soon as the creature swooped overhead, he swung his sword, a swarm of translucent insects attacking the akuma.  
  
The akuma paused, beating its wings as the insects attacked it. Angry, agitated hisses spilled from its mouth, fangs sharp as it snarled.  
  
From behind, the sound of several steps running reached Kanda’s ears. He turned, just as he saw Marie appear with the other guards.  
  
Marie ran to Tiedoll. “We heard the attack-“  
  
 _Shriek._  
  
Kanda whirled back around. Just as he did, something slammed into him, sharp talons digging into his shoulders as the akuma jerked him, carrying him off as the ground beneath him disappeared, the guards’ shouts loud and panicked. “It has the prince!”  
  
Kanda cursed, adrenaline pumping. He kicked his feet as he thrashed about, the akuma refusing to let him go. He didn’t even know how high the creature had flown, the air whipping around them. Without thinking, Kanda took Mugen; his impulse took over as he jabbed the blade into the akuma’s side with an angry thrust, sword illuminating.  
  
The akuma screamed, and the next thing Kanda knew his body was thrown down, the branches sharp as one cut into his side. The branches provided salvation though, the collision barely breaking his fall as his body impacted a few more branches, eventually falling to the base of the tree. He collapsed to the ground as a piercing pain ripped through his core, a grimace marring his face. When he blinked, his vision filled with stars.  
  
“Your Highness!”  
  
Several guards rushed over, as they immediately hovered over Kanda. Aggravated, Kanda forced himself up. “Tch, I’m _fine_ -“ He cut off, the pain in his side unbearable as he clasped at the area. The sensation of something warm and sticky encompassed his palm before he looked at his hand. Blood.  
  
The akuma screeched, and Kanda looked over. Tiedoll had once again trapped the creature, and Marie also had activated his innocence: a series of rings on his fingers, silvery strings extending like sharp wires as they cut into the akuma, the strings slicing into the wing before the creature fell, spiraling down onto the earth.  
  
Ignoring the pain, Kanda forced himself to run to where Tiedoll and Marie were, ignoring the protests of the guards.  
  
By the time Kanda arrived, Tiedoll and Marie had restrained the creature. It shrieked and wailed, its tail whipping back in forth agitatedly, face snarling as it looked at the exorcists. “Kill me!”  
  
Kanda froze, the raspy voice striking him into silence. Quickly, he looked at Marie and Tiedoll, equally stunned expressions on their faces.  
  
The akuma hissed, translucent eyes wide. “Kill me…” it repeated. “Damn it, _kill me_ …!”  
  
Kanda didn’t do anything. He had been struck dumb, not even knowing what to think; akuma didn’t speak. They couldn’t. They were mindless demons, and they didn’t-  
  
The akuma screamed, its body thrashing violently against the restraints, the threads snapping just as it moved to attack-  
  
Instinct kicking in, Kanda acted, taking his sword and stabbing it into the akuma’s chest.  
  
Smoke sizzled from the wound, and Kanda withdrew his sword. He clutched at his side, blood spilling out as he watched the creature fall still, its body turning limp.  
  
Kanda exhaled, breaths a bit shallow. His limbs suddenly felt weak and his knees buckled-  
  
Tiedoll caught the prince, keeping him steady. “Heavens, you shouldn’t be standing!“  
  
“I can walk-“ Kanda started to say, but again cut off. He hurt _everywhere_ , and despite his pride even he couldn’t ignore the searing pain that tore through his muscles.  
  
Still steadying Kanda, Tiedoll spoke to the guards. “Start back – we have to hurry and get the prince back to the infirmary!”  
  
The guards nodded, and Marie approached. “Here – let me help. I can get Kanda to the horses if you want to make sure the body is dealt with.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “I’ll deal with the akuma’s remains and make sure any traces are destroyed,” he said, as he helped to slip Kanda’s arm over Marie’s shoulder. Kanda grunted, but didn’t argue any further.  
  
Tiedoll watched as Marie started off with Kanda, the guards just ahead. Turning, the exorcist general looked back at the akuma remains, the body still and unmoving. Lifeless.  
  
 _“Kill me…”_  
  
The words sent a chill down Tiedoll’s spine – one that was all too familiar.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Once the akuma’s remains had been dealt with, the group hurried back to the castle. Because of Kanda’s wounds, he hadn’t been able to ride by himself; instead, he rode with Marie, the other exorcist keeping him steady. In any other situation, Kanda would have been irritable and argumentative about such an arrangement. However, his wounds were too painful to ignore, the fall having done more damage than not.  
  
 _‘Damn akuma had to be able to fly,’_ he thought.  
  
His thoughts didn’t linger on the akuma much longer, as they crossed through the castle gates. Up until this point, Kanda had attempted to at least _look_ like he wasn’t in physical agony; pride aside, he knew that it would only cause worry among others and escalate into some aggravating ordeal. He just needed to get to the infirmary and he’d be fine.  
  
The horses stopped, Mahoja walking out of the front doors. Alarm crossed her features as she immediately noticed the state Kanda was in, and she hurried down the steps. “What happened?”  
  
Marie helped Kanda off, still supporting him with one arm over his shoulder. “We need to get him to the infirmary.”  
  
Majoha nodded, then stepped aside as Marie took Kanda in. Turning, she looked to where the general was. “Tiedoll-“  
  
“It was an akuma,” Tiedoll said. His expression was weary, and his voice unusually solemn. “But, it was like…”  
  
He trailed off, his words dissolving into dust. Tiedoll’s gaze was distant, his thoughts spinning back to a night many years ago, where he had seen…  
  
 _“K-Kill me…” it begged, the voice simultaneously alien and familiar. “Please…please_ kill me _…”_  
  
Mahoja frowned, as she noticed the sudden aloofness. “Tiedoll?”  
  
Tiedoll paused. He glanced around, before nodding inside. “Let’s go in – Queen Anita should know what happened as well.”  
  
Tiedoll walked on, Mahoja eying him warily. However, she said nothing as she followed him inside.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The castle infirmary was not a place Kanda cared to be. The scent was sterile and the space nothing more than a rectangular hall with beds lining the sides where patients could rest and recover. Windows lined the walls, allowing for light to spill in, but otherwise there was nothing interesting to look at.  
  
Kanda really didn’t want to be there.  
  
The mattress felt stiff beneath his body and he shifted. Pain rippled in his side as he grimaced. _‘Fuck…’_  
  
“ _Don’t_ move,” the head nurse snapped. Her expression was pinched, face narrow as her dark eyes peered at Kanda. “It’s a miracle you didn’t shatter every bone in your body – or worse, puncture a lung.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes, a slight sneer on his lips. “It’s not like I’m dead…”  
  
Mathilde pulled back, having just finished bandaging Kanda’s side. When thrown, a sharp branch had broken the skin, leaving a jagged surface-level cut that needed to be cleaned. By some miracle, any other open wounds were minimal – though dark bruises had already started to form on Kanda’s body, with his ribs having suffered the worst of it.  
  
“You’ll have to rest for the remainder of the day and for the next week. After that, you’ll still need to take it easy.”  
  
Kanda huffed, as he turned his face to the side.  
  
“Stay here at least a few hours before going back to your room – _don’t_ move,” Mathilde instructed.  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything as the head nurse left, the sound of her heels clicking against the smooth floor.  
  
Silence filled the infirmary after that. There were not many occupants – just guards who had been wounded in training sessions and a few servants who were unwell. Kanda hadn’t been placed with them, instead situated back in a more private area where some of the beds were sectioned off by curtains.  
  
Outside the curtains, someone shuffled, the fabric pulling back. “How are you feeling?”  
  
Kanda didn’t bother to look at Marie. “I’d feel better if I wasn’t here.”  
  
Marie hummed softly. “It’s only temporary. You hurt yourself pretty badly out there.”  
  
Exhaling, Kanda didn’t say anything.  
  
“You know your aunt will be worried.”  
  
Kanda shifted, sitting up despite the head nurse’s previous orders. Searing pain flared in his side, causing him to wince slightly. He ignored it. “Has anyone told her yet?”  
  
Marie thought. “I imagine soon, if they haven’t already. Mahoja will make sure she’s informed of what’s happened.”  
  
Kanda released a breath. He hadn’t thought about how his aunt would react, but he dreaded it already. She got onto Kanda about enough things, and knowing how much she worried, Kanda didn’t want to think about how she’d act now.  
  
“You can’t blame her,” Marie pointed out, as though he had somehow read Kanda’s thoughts. “You’re her only family and she doesn’t want anything to happen to you.”  
  
“Yeah, well it’s not like I can just hang back when shit happens,” Kanda grumbled.  
  
Marie opened his mouth to speak, but paused. “Sounds like you have visitors.”  
  
Kanda blinked, before he heard what Marie was talking about.  
  
“Kanda!”  
  
The curtains pulled back again, with Daisya and Lavi pushing through. Daisya made his way first, his normally shrewd eyes wide, hood having fallen as his short, dark hair stuck out in spikes. “Is it true? There was an actual flying akuma out there!?”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes, annoyed by the unnecessary excitement. “It’s not the first time an akuma has had that ability.”  
  
“But it actually grabbed you!? How big was it?” Daisya threw his hands up, gesture exaggerated. “I’m so pissed I missed this!”  
  
“What the hell? It wasn’t a fucking show!” Kanda snapped. “Who even told you already?”  
  
Lavi stepped forward, his expression somewhat wary. “A lot of people are already talking about it,” he explained. “Some of the townspeople saw some large, winged animal flying around – then everyone saw you guys coming back, and how beaten up you were. News travels fast, especially when the crown prince is involved.”  
  
Kanda’s face twisted into annoyance. Great – _great_. He should have known something like this would get talked about, but to already have it going around…  
  
“Next time, I am _not_ being the emergency backup,” Daisya said. “Someone else can do it. Otherwise I miss out on all the fun.”  
  
“What even happened?” Lavi asked as he took note of Kanda’s appearance. “Seriously, I know it’s been six months since I’ve been here, but you usually don’t get hit this hard by things...”  
  
“Tch. It just caught me off guard,” Kanda mumbled. “It was weird…it talked and everything.”  
  
“Wait, what?” Lavi looked, his green eye wide. “It talked? Akuma can’t talk – they don’t have that ability!”  
  
“Yeah, well this one did.”  
  
Daisya blinked, glancing between Lavi and Kanda. “Eh…Kanda, you sure? You look like you hit your head pretty hard…”  
  
“He’s telling the truth.”  
  
Everyone fell silent, their attention turning to Marie. Softly, he continued. “Kanda’s right…the akuma we fought spoke. Just before it died.”  
  
No one said anything at first. The air remained quiet, with Daisya and Lavi both taking in the revelation. But Lavi soon caved, asking the unspoken question that had already begun to fester. “Well…what did it say?”  
  
Marie didn’t answer. Kanda also remained quiet, his thoughts turning distant as he recalled the end of the battle with the akuma, and its damaged, withering body…  
  
 _“Kill me.”_  
  
The words slipped into Kanda’s mind, their ghostly echo causing his insides to coil. They had been so pained and so _desperate_ …  
  
“It told us to kill it,” Kanda finally said, words low. “It just kept asking that.”  
  
Lavi inhaled quietly. “An akuma that wants to die?” He frowned, expression turning pensive. “That’s-”  
  
He was cut off, the curtains yanked back forcefully. Lavi nearly fell forward as the head nurse glared, gaze scathing as she looked between Daisya and Lavi. “Did I give either of you two permission to come back here?”  
  
“Uh-“ Daisya wavered before trying to slip off.  
  
He didn’t get a chance to escape, Mathilde yanking him and Lavi both by the ears. “If you two are going to sneak in here, that means trouble – and I don’t need you causing any disruptions for my patients.”  
  
“Ow, ow, ow!” Lavi whined. “Why am _I_ being yanked!? I’m a visiting scholar!”  
  
Mathilde ignored his pleas as she pulled Lavi and Daisya away, their objections fading away.  
  
Marie turned back to Kanda. “I should probably go before she decides I’ve been here too long. I’ll check in later.”  
  
“Hn.” Kanda crossed his arms. “I better not be here that long.”  
  
“Just try to take it easy.” Marie paused, before continuing. “The examination is just a few weeks away. You’ll need to be careful not to strain yourself anymore before then.”  
  
Kanda stilled. The exorcist examination. _‘Damn it…’_  
  
Marie pulled the curtain aside, leaving Kanda. “Don’t worry – you’ll do alright.”  
  
The reassurance felt genuine, but Kanda didn’t say anything, releasing a breath as Marie left.  
  
The examination. Since the akuma attack, he hadn’t even thought of it. Kanda had meant to really intensify his training over the next two weeks, but he wouldn’t be able to if he was recovering.  
  
 _‘Just what I need…’_ he thought, allowing himself to fall back onto the pillow.  
  
He would just have to make it work somehow. He had worked too hard to fail now.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Anita was teary-eyed when Mahoja told her what happened. The news had undoubtedly been shocking, if anything because of what had happened during the attack. While Anita wasn’t so ignorant to have known the risk, it didn’t lessen the blow of hearing of how badly injured her nephew had been.  
  
Tiedoll looked at the queen sympathetically. “He’s being treated now in the infirmary, Your Majesty – Marie took him there.”  
  
Anita steadied herself, doing her best to keep composed. It was easier said than done, though; more than anything, she wanted to go straight to the infirmary. She took a breath, her chest threatening to quiver. “Is he-?”  
  
“He’ll recover,” Tiedoll reassured her, before smiling softly. “He’s in good hands. I’m sure Mathilde is taking good care of him.”  
  
Anita nodded. She remained seated on the throne, which was embellished with silver and pearl. Before Mahoja and Tiedoll had arrived, she had been speaking to several advisors, though they had been dismissed. The room was thus otherwise empty, its splendor and ivory walls shrouded in an almost eerie emptiness – only Tiedoll, Mahoja, and Bookman were present, the silence weighing between all four of them.  
  
Bookman’s dark eyes flickered to the regent. He had been included with the earlier meeting with the advisors, but had stayed after their dismissal. A pensive look lingered in his eyes. “What sort of akuma was it?”  
  
Tiedoll paused, his hesitation sharp. However, the soundless air loomed heavily as everyone waited for his answer.  
  
“It was a strong one – stronger than the kind we usually see,” Tiedoll explained. “Normally, we may come across one or two causing trouble, but they’re easily dealt with. This one was different.”  
  
“How so?” Bookman asked.  
  
Again, Tiedoll threatened to waver. His thoughts clouded with distant memories, blended images of marred faces and inhuman voices. It threatened to send a shudder down his spine, but he fought it, standing his ground as he looked at Anita. “This one spoke. It spoke like the other one did.”  
  
Anita’s heart nearly stopped, the words holding the sharpness of a smooth knife. She brought a pale hand to her mouth, the revelation striking a cold, sinking sensation into her chest. _‘It…’_  
  
She couldn’t even think about it – about that terrible night ten years ago. That terrible night, when she had lost her brother.  
  
Bookman sighed, the sound weary. “I was afraid of this…”  
  
Mahoja’s gaze turned sharp. “Afraid of what?”  
  
Bookman paused, as he took note of Anita. The queen regent was obviously distressed, though she had managed to refrain from breaking down. It caused Bookman to be a bit wary, but at the same time, the conversation was not one that could be avoided.  
  
He turned to the others. “Queen Anita and I already met earlier to discuss this, but there have been some disturbances in the other kingdoms. People have started to go missing. At first, it wasn’t something that was as paid attention to – until a few exorcists began to disappear. The kingdom of Othelion has already lost two exorcists, and Liorea has increased their security with more CROWs in the meantime. Though, when we sent some to Othelion…a few of those CROWs disappeared as well.”  
  
Shock flickered across both Tiedoll and Mahoja’s expressions. While exoercists were the best ones equipped to handle exorcists, the CROWs were specialized soldiers trained to assist with defenses. They were centralized in Liorea though, usually being reserved for the Black Order’s defenses.  
  
Tiedoll was the first to speak. “These exorcists and the CROWs – did anyone find out what happened to them?”  
  
“No, we don’t know. But, there was a large string of attacks after every disappearance. Whatever is happening, it’s only a matter of time before Liorea and Ilveria are hit.” Bookman’s words were leaden, as he took a small breath. “With this recent attack, it gives me reason to believe Ilveria may be next.”  
  
“We don’t know that,” Mahoja argued. “We don’t know that-“  
  
“Mahoja.”  
  
Mahoja stopped, as she looked at Anita. The queen’s words had been soft, yet strong enough to silence anyone speaking in a heartbeat.  
  
Anita looked at everyone, before speaking. “We need to take this seriously – we can’t risk the welfare of our people.”  
  
Bookman nodded. His dark eyes turned cautious, his next words spoken carefully. “With these risks, those who are both of royal blood and act as exorcists in other kingdoms are currently stepping down from being active exorcists – unless absolutely necessary. Princess Lenalee in Othelion just did so recently. It would be wise for Prince Yuu to do the same.”  
  
Mahoja was surprised. “He’d no longer be an exorcist?”  
  
“No – not necessarily,” Bookman explained. “He’d technically still be one, but he wouldn’t be on the frontline unless it was an emergency.”  
  
Tiedoll frowned, but he didn’t argue. What Bookman said was logical, and given the recent events, it would have been foolish to refrain from such a change. He sighed. “Kanda won’t be pleased to hear this, but it should be done. He shouldn’t be on the frontline to begin with.”  
  
“What about the exorcist examination?” Mahoja asked.  
  
“He’d still go through with it and he should still train,” Bookman said. “We just can’t risk anything happening to the only heir in this kingdom.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded in agreement.  
  
Anita exhaled softly. Her eyes had finally stopped burning, her emotions slowly becoming more containable. “I will tell Yuu – I will tell him when I see him.” She looked at the others, gaze pleading. “Please, make sure no one says anything to him prior.”  
  
Everyone nodded, the decision final.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The rest of the day was unpleasant for Kanda.  
  
He had been kept in the infirmary for several long hours, unable to move under the head nurse’s hawk-eye observation. For a while, he had started to think he may be forced to stay the whole evening – even the night. It wasn’t as though his injuries were minimal scratches, as much as Kanda hated to admit it; his body ached more than he remembered it ever aching in a long time. Even with how worn out he was, sleeping was difficult.  
  
By sundown, he was able to return to his own room. However, Mathilde was stern in her instruction that Kanda was to be escorted by another nurse – something that even in his current state, he was loathed to accept.  
  
“I’m not going to break walking back to my own room,” Kanda argued, forcing himself to stand. “It’s just a waste of time for you.”  
  
The nurse hesitated, visibly uncomfortable by the resistance. As for Mathilde, she was only annoyed. “It’s not a waste of time given the condition you’re in – I’m tempted to keep you here all night at this rate.”  
  
Kanda glared, growing more agitated by the minute. “I already said I’m _fine_ -“  
  
He cut off, gentle footsteps breaking his train of thought. Turning, Kanda saw his aunt had just entered the infirmary, having approached where he was with Mathilde and the other nurse. He immediately noticed her expression, which was wrought with worry – and a sense of unease filled Kanda.  
  
Mathilde and the nurse bowed slightly, as Anita approached. “Your Majesty.”  
  
Anita nodded briefly, before focusing her attention on Kanda. Almost instantly, her dark eyes turned glassy and without another second passing she took Kanda’s hands, and pulled him close. “I’m so relieved you’re alright.”  
  
Her words held a tremble and Kanda stiffened. He was never good with physical affection and had always been squeamish with it as a child; the fact that his aunt was so visibly shaken only made it all the more awkward as he struggled to respond properly. In a way, he almost preferred it when she was scolding him – dealing with Anita when she was upset was close to unbearable. “Stop worrying.”  
  
Anita pulled back. Although she was clearly still distraught over Kanda’s injuries, she returned her attention to Mathilde. “I hope Yuu hasn’t given you too much trouble – I know he can be a bit stubborn.”  
  
Kanda’s ears burned, nerves pinched by the words. However, he kept his mouth shut.  
  
“He was being a bit resistant, but nothing I haven’t been able to handle.” Mathilde paused, before her attention flickered to the other nurse. “I was trying to insist he be escorted back to his room by a nurse.”  
  
Anita nodded in understanding. “I can go with him,” she said, before smiling gently. “I wanted to speak with him.”  
  
“Of course, Your Majesty.”  
  
Anita turned to leave after that, with Kanda following. As they walked, Kanda found himself silently debating on what would be more awkward: having had the nurse escort him back or his aunt. And truthfully, he wasn’t sure – but the fact that Anita had wanted to speak to Kanda made him a bit tense. Knowing her, she would chide him for being reckless.  
  
Once they were heading down a corridor, Kanda exhaled. He realized he might as well get it over with. “What did you want to talk about?”  
  
Anita didn’t respond at first. Her expression was contemplative, gaze forward before she sighed. “I worry about you, Yuu. I really do.”  
  
 _‘Not this shit again.’_ Kanda fought a groan. “It wasn’t that serious.”  
  
“Yuu.” Anita’s tone turned firm as she looked at him. “Please don’t downplay this – Tiedoll has already briefed me on what happened. He told me what happened with you and the akuma.”  
  
Kanda inwardly cringed. He shouldn’t have been surprised – Tiedoll was always annoyingly efficient at relaying information back to his aunt and Kanda should have suspected this to be the case. “It just caught me off guard – I was able to hold my own against it.”  
  
“Yuu, it could have _killed_ you. It almost did.” Anita remained unbending in her stance as she stopped walking. She turned to face Kanda directly. “I know you’ve trained hard, but this doesn’t change how dangerous these situations are. Even more so now, it seems.”  
  
As Anita said this, Kanda’s gaze turned suspicious. “What’s that supposed to mean?”  
  
Anita hesitated. “Bookman has informed me of a string of disappearances in the other kingdoms – some being exorcists, and even a few CROWs who were traveling from Liorea,” she explained. “In Othelion, Princess Lenalee has stepped down from being an active exorcist until the cause of these disappearances is determined – to ensure nothing happens to her. Any member of royalty who is also an exorcist is to do the same.”  
  
Kanda blinked, a beat of a second passing before he caught on, expression darkening. “I’m _not_ stepping down.” He tried to keep his tone calm, reminding himself that he was speaking to his aunt, but he strained to do so as his frustration brimmed over. “If I step down as one, I may as well be useless!“  
  
Anita exhaled. “That’s not true.” While she also appeared exasperated, she tried to continue calmly. “This situation isn’t one we can take lightly, Yuu. And you are the only heir in this kingdom-“  
  
“I didn’t train all these years just to sit around and do _nothing_ ,” Kanda argued. “And I’m sure as hell not about to hang back while the others go out there-“  
  
“ _Yuu_.”  
  
Kanda stopped. Anita’s tone had been sharp – sharper than what she normally used. Jaw tight, he gnashed his teeth together, looking away. He could already envision the look she must have been giving him and he didn’t want to see it.  
  
Anita watched Kanda, the silence falling between them tense and heavy. “I won’t argue with you on this. But the decision is made – you won’t actively be performing as an exorcist for the time being. You will still go through with the examination in a little less than a month, but otherwise you will need to focus your energy elsewhere.” Her words, though stern, were laced in weariness and what she said next was spoken even more softly, a strange fragility to her voice. “You’re the only family I have left – I can’t lose you, either.”  
  
The words were like a knife into Kanda’s chest and a small part of him instantly regretted how he had spoken toward his aunt. However, this didn’t change the deep frustration he felt – the anger he felt at suddenly being powerless and unable to do _anything_ …  
  
Anita walked up to Kanda. “There are other ways to protect people, Yuu. And you still have so much you’ll need to learn before becoming king.”  
  
Kanda huffed quietly. There it was again – that reminder of what it took to rule and what all else he needed to learn. Right or not, it did little to ease his vexation.  
  
“Please try to get some rest,” Anita pleaded. “I don’t want you to push yourself any further.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He didn’t trust himself not to say anything to add to the tension.  
  
Anita sighed gently. “I’ll see that dinner is sent to your room this evening. Please be nice to the servants when they bring it.”  
  
“Tch.” Kanda wanted to roll his eyes – he could have gotten his own food.  
  
Anita paused, eying Kanda for a moment longer. Realizing he wasn’t going to say anything, she bid him farewell. “I’ll see you in the morning.”  
  
Kanda nodded as his aunt left after that. He watched as she continued back down the corridor, her footsteps growing faint until she was out of sight.  
  
Kanda crossed his arms, ignoring the painful throb in his side. His gaze wandered, landing on one of the windows that faced north. Already, the sky had darkened into a medley of pinks and violets, the forest dark in the distance.  
  
 _“Kill me…”_  
  
Kanda’s muscles tensed. He hadn’t been able to get the akuma out of his head, its horrid face and pitiful words branded into his memory. He hadn’t been able to forget, and he hadn’t been able to stop wondering.  
  
 _‘Why did it want to die?’_  
  
Kanda turned away from the window. Something didn’t sit right with him, and the fact that he was being required to step down as an exorcist when this was happening…  
  
He didn’t like it. He didn’t like it one bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Friday! I had meant to post this earlier (really, more like last night before crashing), but AO3 stopped working - not sure if anyone else had a semi-heart attack, but I know for a moment I panicked. XD
> 
> I was super excited to share this chapter, mostly because there’s some action involved. I still struggle with action sequences from time to time, but I’m slowly getting more comfortable writing them. It also helps that this kicks off some plot elements too - which hopefully will piece together more easily as time goes on. There’s already quite a few hints being dropped, and while I’m not sure how obvious they are, I hope they’re enjoyable either way. 
> 
> (I also just...enjoyed bringing the head nurse/Mathilde back. She’s a character I enjoy so much, and I really liked using her in Encompassed in Glass. Of course I had to bring her back for this. X3)
> 
> Again, this is technically a very _loose_ interpretation of Swan Lake. So I’m taking a bunch of liberties. There will be more parallels later on, so for those of you familiar with that story you may recognize some elements as the story continues. ;3 (There actually is some inspiration from the story of Giselle, as well - though, that’s another ballet. It’s not necessary to know by any means, but I realized I hadn’t noted that story as also sparking some ideas. XD)
> 
> There is still a bit of build up before things really get ramped up, and the next chapter in particular is going to be more transitional. But not long after, it’ll pick up again. :3
> 
> Thank you so much to everyone who has left comments so far - again, I can’t reiterate how much comments and feedback help me to keep writing, especially during this time. It’s really helps with my motivation to push through! Please do leave any thoughts or feedback. <3 <3 <3


	4. Inner Musings

When night fell, the forest was like a maze: twisting, turning, spiraling. The branches looked more gnarled, the leaves more shadowed. Fog hung low to the ground in the deeper parts of the forest, wildflowers shrouded in a dense mist like a bride’s forsaken veil.  
  
A lake cut through the less explored areas. The waters were still as moonlight spilled onto its surface, glimmering like crushed diamonds in the darkness of the night. The lake was quiet and tranquil; despite the unrelenting shadows of the forest, the lake remained a beacon.  
  
On the edge of the lake, the ruins of a small castle remained. There was hardly anything left, the stone having mostly crumbled save for a tower, and the skeletal remains of what may have once been a fort. It was untouched and forgotten by humans, moss and vines climbing the dark stone walls as a few white flowers lingered twisted themselves into the cracks – the only hint of life to touch the ruins.  
  
Road thought it was pretty.  
  
She liked the ruins – she always had. There was something mesmerizing about their brokenness. About their fragility as they threatened to one day crumble to rubble, with nothing to tether them to the waking world. She liked the hollow emptiness of the space, the roof nearly fallen to shambles when it had once been strong and fortified. She liked it for its mortality.  
  
Weak. Fragile. Nothing was ever sacred in this world.  
  
Road sighed, leaning back against the wall. She stared out onto the lake, the water gleaming beautifully.  
  
“Wisely,” she sang. “Are you done yet?”  
  
From behind the ruins, a young man stepped out. Wisely’s expression turned mildly annoyed as he placed a hand on his hip. “I am now – I told you I’d tell you when I am. If you distract me too soon, I lose focus.”  
  
The words were clipped and Road sighed dramatically. “Don’t be so stiff – besides, you’ve been in there such a long time anyways.” She rolled her head back, a hint of impatience marring her face. “Ugh, I’m getting so bored here. Nothing interesting ever happens and I’m running out of things to _do_.”  
  
“You’re being impatient.” Wisely crossed his arms as he walked to Road. He leaned back against the wall, his strange third eye peering into the darkness. “We just have to wait a bit. Though it’d be easier if we had more…cooperation.”  
  
Road’s gaze flickered to Wisely, her large eyes blinking before she smirked. “Oh – you mean that akuma we used just a few weeks ago?” She laughed, the sound cold and devoid of any softness. “I thought it did a nice enough job. I was a bit disappointed it didn’t kill anyone though – especially that prince. But that would have made things too easy.”  
  
“It was a _waste_.” Wisely huffed. “I’m getting irritated by this – I swear, that one should have been better.”  
  
“Oh, don’t be too hard on yourself. You know how finicky they can be.” Road grinned, her golden eyes turning bright. “Tyki should be coming soon. He’s been looking for another candidate for us. And we still have that other one we can use in the meantime…so far, he’s been compliant.”  
  
“Hm, I suppose,” Wisely said, his attention turning back to the ruins. “He’s been rather quiet all night. Not that I’m complaining.”  
  
Road leaned over, resting her head on Wisely’s shoulder. She hummed gently. “It’ll work out,” she said. “Eventually, it’ll all crumble…”  
  
Wisely didn’t say anything. He turned his face a bit more, glancing back toward where the skeleton of a doorway remained in the ruins. In it, he saw the silhouette of a person sitting, body still and soundless, their arm slouched over their knee as they rested against the stone wall.  
  
Wisely looked away, his attention returning to the lake.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Almost three weeks had passed since the akuma attack and Kanda was growing restless.  
  
He hadn’t been able to train as much, with the first week following the incident having been dedicated to rest and recovery. However, by the end of that week, Kanda’s injuries had become bearable enough that he was able to pick up Mugen once more, returning to the training room to practice. Orders be damned, Kanda wouldn’t be able to give up training – he knew Anita wanted for him to focus on other responsibilities, but he still had the exorcist examination. He had trained too long to fail that now.  
  
His aunt’s requests that he focus on other areas would have to wait.  
  
Daisya attacked using Charity Bell as he kicked it at Kanda. The metallic ball sparked and Kanda deflected, the impact causing him to skid back before he knocked the ball back, the object hitting the invisible barrier that protected any onlookers in the training arena.  
  
Kanda paused, lowering his sword. He took a breath, sweat clinging to his skin. He and Daisya had been training the last several hours, compensating for any missed time. Admittedly, Kanda was growing tired; his body was beginning to ache terribly and his arm felt as though it were close to falling off.  
  
Daisya felt similar. He collected Charity Bell, kicking it up as he caught it. “Okay…I may need a break for a bit.”  
  
Kanda nodded. “Fine.”  
  
They exited the arena. Lavi remained by the door, being the only spectator, arms crossed as his body slouched against the frame.  
  
Daisya collapsed onto a nearby bench. “Damn, that was a workout…”  
  
Lavi whistled lowly. “I’ll say – Marie had mentioned you started training three hours ago?” He eyed Kanda warily. “Are you sure you can even handle that right now? I thought you were supposed to be taking it easy.”  
  
Kanda scowled, eyes brimming with annoyance. “I can handle it.”  
  
“Gotta be ready for that examination.” Daisya grinned, an almost teasing edge to his voice. “It’s only like a week and a half away.”  
  
Kanda ignored him as he took a seat on a bench, resting Mugen against it. He ran his hand over the back of his neck, skin hot and sticky with sweat. _‘Only a week and a half,’_ he thought, the realization leaving a strange, flat feeling in his chest. There was still an antsy, anticipation in his core about the examination coming up, but it wasn’t exactly the same excitement and anxiousness he had felt before. Before, Kanda would have gotten an official exorcist title while also being an active one. But now…  
  
He’d have the title, but that would be it.  
  
The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth. He’d tried not to think about it too much, but that was easier said than done.  
  
“What are you up to?” Daisya asked, as he conversed with Lavi. “Figured Bookman would have had you busting your ass over something.”  
  
Lavi grinned. “He’s distracted now – he’s meeting with Queen Anita, so I had a chance to escape,” he said, before pausing contemplatively. “I’ll probably have to actually do research soon, though. But I needed a break.”  
  
Kanda snorted. “You take more than enough of them from what I’ve seen.”  
  
“Aw, don’t be so harsh on me! It’s not easy work taking in all the knowledge of the kingdoms. And traveling between all three takes a toll on you.” Lavi shifted, his expression turning slightly more serious. “Anyways, Bookman’s been keeping me up at night going through stuff – this whole thing with these strange akuma and disappearances has been taking up a lot of our time. We’re trying to make the most of your library since we sort of went through everything in Liorea…and Othelion, when we were there.”  
  
“Find anything interesting?” Daisya asked, as he leaned back on another bench. “It’s been pretty quiet since that one attack here. I’m kind of disappointed.”  
  
“Nah – nothing dealing with this specific situation at least,” Lavi ansered. His brow pinched together. “I just don’t get it…I’ve never heard of an akuma that talked, let alone wanted to die. I mean, _maybe_ if it was highly evolved or something, speech could be a thing. But, wanting someone to finish it off? That goes against any primal instinct they’d have.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. Despite his initial aloofness, his ears had perked as the conversation shifted – even more so at the mention of the akuma. Kanda still hadn’t been able to forget about it. The way it looked. The way it pleaded…  
  
Kanda couldn’t stop thinking about the damned thing.  
  
“Yeah, I don’t know either.” Daisya shrugged. “Seems weird to me…”  
  
“Oh, right!” Lavi looked at Kanda as he changed the topic once more with the speed of an energetic rabbit. “I’m supposed to tell you – your aunt wants to talk to you after she finishes her meeting with Bookman.”  
  
Kanda’s face scrunched up. “Why?”  
  
“Didn’t say. But she wanted to make sure – hey, where are you going?”  
  
Kanda looked back at Lavi, gaze threatening. He had gotten up to take his leave, grabbing his sword. “If you tell her you saw me, I’ll cut your other eye out.”  
  
Lavi stammered. “Geez, calm down! Didn’t realize you were trying to avoid her.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He left the training room, with Daisya and Lavi’s voices fading behind him. He moved quickly, not wanting to get caught if one of them decided to follow. No, he needed to be alone for a bit – he needed space.  
  
He needed to breathe.  
  
He navigated the corridors quickly, taking a few shortcuts before he exited out of one of the side entrances to the castle – a more concealed and hidden door usually used by the servants. No one was around and the door was somewhat heavy; it was unlocked, though, and Kanda slipped out, vines and ivy tendrils clinging to the outside of the door.  
  
The exit led him into the east gardens. It was an open space, with cherry blossom trees close to the castle walls. Like the ones in the courtyard, the blossoms were gone, the green leaves bright and lush in the sunlight. An array of flowers could be seen in the gardens, a path cutting through them; nearby, there was a pond as well, a bridge stretching across it.  
  
Kanda leaned back against one of the trees, his gaze lingering near the pond. On the smooth surface, several buds remained – lotus flowers. They had not quite bloomed yet, but the pink and white blossoms remained visible.  
  
Kanda exhaled, sinking down as he sat against the tree. He placed Mugen beside him, the sword resting against the grass, the texture soft and cool.  
  
Glancing up, Kanda got a glimpse of the sky: strikingly clear and intensely blue. _‘Just like…’_  
  
_Blue. The sky was really blue that day.  
  
He couldn’t stop looking at it. It was just so bright and endless – almost too bright. Too bright for the black attire that he had been forced to wear. Too bright for the tragedy that had just befallen several nights before. He just felt so numb and so empty, but the sky was _there _…  
  
He wanted to follow it. He wanted to go away. Somewhere. _Anywhere _.  
  
Someone placed a hand on his shoulder, but he didn’t bother to look. Not even as they gently urged him to come back inside…  
  
_The memory dissipated, the image fleeting. Kanda closed his eyes. Meditate – he should meditate while he was somewhere quiet. He hadn’t been able to in a while and the lack of practice was wearing on him.  
  
He crossed his legs, concentrating as he attempted to clear his thoughts. He counted his breaths, trying to focus on his surroundings: the coolness of the shade, the scent of fresh flowers. Anything to ground him, and to help keep him centered.  
  
_“Damn it,_ kill me _…!”_  
  
The image of the akuma flashed in Kanda’s mind. He tensed as an unnatural, sickening sensation overcame him. Without thinking, he grabbed Mugen, gaze alert as he made a motion to stand-  
  
He stopped as soon as he realized what he was doing.  
  
_‘What the hell?’_ Kanda shook his head as he once more sat back against the tree. He didn’t know what had just happened, but his adrenaline pumped, heart racing in his chest anxiously. He didn’t understand why – the akuma was gone. Kanda had killed it himself. It was nothing more than some distant memory now. Nothing more than a ghost of a monster. _‘It was just an akuma…’_  
  
A sudden wave of frustration befell him. The east gardens were often a place of solace, but today it seemed even they could only do so much. Kanda just couldn’t escape his own thoughts.  
  
“Fucking stupid,” Kanda grumbled, half-tempted to leave. He wasn’t sure what the point of staying outside would be if he couldn’t get any peace.  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw someone approach. Kanda’s thoughts drew to a halt as he looked over, still somewhat tense. If it were a servant or groundskeeper, he wouldn’t have to worry about them bothering him, but anyone else – he may need to slip away.  
  
He calmed down as soon as he saw it was only Marie.  
  
Marie didn’t appear to have noticed Kanda, likely because of how still he had been. The exorcist looked as though he had come from one of the south entry ways, following one of the paths that cut through the garden. However, he stopped just a short distance from where Kanda was as he angled his face in the prince’s direction.  
  
Kanda sighed quietly. He didn’t know how Marie always knew so perfectly where everyone was despite not being able to see. “It’s just me.”  
  
Recognizing the voice, Marie approached Kanda. “Thought you were still training.”  
  
“Hn.”  
  
Marie didn’t say anything at first, his attention still focused on Kanda. Quietly, he walked over. “Is it okay if I take a seat here?”  
  
Kanda shrugged. “I don’t care.”  
  
Marie did so, picking a spot near where Kanda was in the shade. He kept quiet, his face turning up toward where the sky was, the leaves of the tree blocking some of the sunlight. “What does it look like today?”  
  
Kanda shifted. The question was asked gently, for a moment abating Kanda’s agitation. He hesitated to answer, his eyes flickering out toward the sky before he looked away, focusing on the gardens instead. “Clear. There aren’t any clouds out today.”  
  
“I wondered. I can feel the sunlight.” Marie paused, before continuing. “General Tiedoll was still out…”  
  
Kanda frowned. He already knew that Tiedoll had left earlier that day with several guards – to scout some of the forest. Ever since the akuma attack several weeks ago, all of the unit had been trading off to do rounds. Except Kanda.  
  
“It’s only temporary. With you not going,” Marie said, as though he had been able to look into Kanda’s very thoughts. “I know you’d rather be out there.”  
  
Kanda sneered under his breath. “I hate being so damn useless.”  
  
“I don’t know if I’d think of it that way,” Marie said, the suggestion spoken carefully. “There are other ways to be proactive and you’re in a position to do so.”  
  
Scowl remaining, Kanda rested his chin in the palm of his hand, his attention still placed on the gardens ahead. Had any other person spoken such words, he likely would have gotten up and left. But Kanda knew Marie and the exorcist was one of the few people Kanda could genuinely tolerate listening to. Marie was usually more calming to be around.  
  
That didn’t mean he entirely liked what Marie said.  
  
“I just can’t stand it…being here like this,” Kanda mumbled, the edge that so often clung to his worlds melting away like frost beneath the sunlight. “I keep thinking about that akuma…”  
  
_‘And…’_  
  
Kanda didn’t say anymore, his thoughts quieting before the words could pierce his chest.  
  
Marie didn’t say anything either. The air remained quiet, the leaves gently rustling overhead. In the distance, birds chirped, the gardens tranquil.  
  
Kanda and Marie stayed outside a bit longer.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
By late afternoon, Anita was exhausted.  
  
She closed her eyes, her slim fingers pressing against the side of her head. She had just finished yet another meeting – this one with some of the advisors once more focusing on taxes and finances. On any other day, Anita would have been able to handle such a topic with ease. However, there had been another meeting earlier that touched on the security of the kingdom and then one of the advisors had brought up Kanda…  
  
Anita sighed, as she sat more upright in her seat. The advisors had left the meeting hall, a few lingering by the door to speak with one another before they took their leave.  
  
One advisor paused – a middle aged lord with dark hair. A bit warily, he wavered on departing before approaching the long meeting table where Anita still remained seated. “Ahem, Your Majesty?”  
  
Anita looked over at the advisor. “Yes?”  
  
The advisor hesitated. “You will speak to the prince about what was discussed earlier, correct?” he asked, his inquiry posed somewhat cautiously.  
  
Anita sucked in a small breath, but nodded politely. “I’ll find a time to discuss it with him,” she answered. “Thank you.”  
  
The advisor nodded in understanding, before leaving.  
  
Mahoja and Bookman stood nearby, both of them having just watched the exchange. A frown remained on Mahoja’s face as she watched the advisor depart, the rest finally dispersing from the meeting hall.  
  
Anita pushed her chair back as she stood, looking over at Mahoja. “Mahoja, do you know if Yuu was still training?”  
  
“The last anyone heard, he was – Lavi went to go find him.” Mahoja’s expression turned pensive, a hint of concern flickering in her eyes. “Are you going to talk to him about what was brought up today?”  
  
Anita clasped her hands together gently. While she remained poised as always, her carefully composed expression fractured a little, dark eyes thoughtful.  
  
Bookman’s gaze remained shrewd, and his words were careful. “It would be wise for him to consider it,” he pointed out. “Especially now if he won’t be an active exorcist.”  
  
Anita sighed. “I know it would be. But I worry about bringing it up now,” she admitted.  
  
“He’ll have to face it at some point,” Bookman said. “It’s standard that most heirs are engaged to someone by their coronation. If that’s two years away, it wouldn’t be unreasonable for Prince Yuu to start thinking about it now. Especially if he hopes to return to exorcism – having a spouse would ensure that the kingdom is looked after if anything were to happen.”  
  
The words weighed heavily on Anita, but she didn’t disagree with them. Marriage was not required by law at the time of one’s coronation and it truthfully was not something that she had discussed with her nephew. Kanda was already more than resistant to focusing on his responsibilities outside of exorcism and the thought of encouraging him to begin a courtship was alone tedious. But with everything that had been happening, it made sense: Kanda choosing a spouse in the near future would secure things.  
  
“I’ll find a time to bring it up to him,” she said, before changing the subject. “The exorcist examination will be occurring soon – do we have any word of when Legory Peck will arrive?”  
  
Bookman’s lips pressed together contemplatively “At least a few days before the examination, I assume. Though, he could arrive earlier.”  
  
“We can check to make sure everything is ready in case he does arrive sooner than expected.” Anita hesitated before she posed her next questions tentatively. “Have you found anything since arriving here?”  
  
Bookman sighed, eyes heavy and tired. “Unfortunately, not. My apprentice and I have been going through the archives, but nothing about the sort of akuma seen a few weeks ago, or the disappearances that have taken place. It seems as much a mystery as what happened ten years ago.”  
  
Anita nodded, eyes leaden with worry. “I see.”  
  
“Do you think there’s a connection?” Mahoja asked. “Between what happened then and now.”  
  
Bookman hummed. “I can’t say – we really don’t know enough to be sure and we couldn’t find out anything in Liorea either. But it’s not something we should risk.”  
  
Anita nodded, then turned to Mahoja. “Would you mind escorting me back to my chambers? While I have time, I’d like to rest for a bit.”  
  
Mahoja nodded. “Of course.”  
  
Anita smiled at her, before turning to Bookman. “I know you sent Lavi to find Yuu – please let him know not to worry if he couldn’t. I’m sure I’ll find my nephew at some point.”  
  
Bookman nodded and Anita left the meeting room with Mahoja.  
  
They walked in silence at first, passing a few servants as they moved through the corridors. Anita kept close to Mahoja, though, the guard’s presence offering her some solace.  
  
The action didn’t go unnoticed and Mahoja’s gaze rested on Anita. “You should try not to worry so much, Majesty – it’s not good for you.”  
  
Anita looked back at Mahoja. She attempted to smile, though her eyes remained tired. “I know,” she admitted. “It’s a bit of a challenge not to do that in this position.”  
  
Mahoja’s expression softened, the wear in Anita’s voice all too evident. “You should really try to take it easy the rest of today. I can check in with the staff to make sure everything is situated for when Legory Peck arrives.”  
  
“Thank you, Mahoja.” Anita’s gaze was warm as she smiled kindly. “I really appreciate all you’ve done to help.”  
  
The sweetness in Anita’s words filled Mahoja with warmth – so much that she almost lost the ability to speak. She nodded, barely managing her next words. “It’s my duty.” Quickly, she changed the subject. “Should I let the prince know you were looking for him if I see him?”  
  
Anita shook her head. “It’s fine – as I told Bookman, I’m sure I’ll see Yuu later,” she said, exhaling softly. “I’m still not sure what I’ll say to him…I’m not even sure if I should say something now, when the exorcist examination is coming up. He hasn’t said it, but I know he’s overwhelmed with things. Izo used to act the same when he felt under pressure. Especially when he was Yuu’s age.”  
  
Mahoja’s gaze turned sympathetic. It wasn’t often that Anita spoke of her older brother.  
  
“It’s strange – seeing how Yuu ended up being the next accommodator for Mugen as well,” Anita continued, gaze distant. “I imagine it makes him feel closer to Izo in a way…”  
  
A thought passed through Mahoja’s mind. “Kanda still doesn’t know…the thing that killed Izo also spoke.”  
  
Anita turned her face slightly, breaking eye contact. An unbearably guilty look glimmered in her eyes. “I haven’t told him yet. If he thinks there’s a connection, he won’t stand by,” she explained. “Bookman is looking into a bit more while he and his apprentice are here. For all we know, it could be unrelated. It’s hard to know with everything else that’s been happening with the other kingdoms.”  
  
Mahoja nodded. While she was uncertain of whether such information should be kept secret, she understood Anita’s reasoning.  
  
“Let’s get you to your room,” Mahoja offered. “You need to rest.”  
  
Anita nodded, and said no more.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The library was quiet as always. Lavi was more than used to it though; back in Liorea, he spent most of his time in the libraries and archives, sifting through countless documents and journals. He actually enjoyed it. Learning and devouring history and knowledge had always been something Lavi thrived in, his mind a well of countless facts ranging from trivial to monumental. Even the long hours couldn’t wear the rush he felt from discovering something new.  
  
Right now was a rare moment of frustration.  
  
He leaned onto the desk, having found a more isolated study hidden in the back of the archives. Dust lined the shelves, many of the books and journals having been untouched for an unknown amount of time. A window remained up high to let some sunlight in, though the glass was fogged and the light dim. Lavi still needed to light a few wax candles so he could better see what he was reading, the golden flames flickering brightly.  
  
“Ugh…” Lavi groaned, as he placed his head down onto the desk. After finding Kanda and Daisya, he had returned to look into some things as Bookman had asked. However, Lavi’s search had been fruitless. Akumas, demons, monsters – he was looking for anything that might have spoken more about them. That might have suggested there was more to them than mindless killing or primal instincts…  
  
“Damn, there’s _nothing_.” He leaned back in his chair, balancing it on the back legs carefully. “I’m starting to wonder if it was even an akuma – _shit_!”  
  
The chair fell back, clattering loudly as Lavi toppled onto the ground. He groaned, vision spinning as he rubbed his head.  
  
The door to the study opened and Bookman walked in. He blankly looked at Lavi. “Get off the ground, you lazy brat.”  
  
“Gee, aren’t you going to ask me if I’m okay?” Lavi asked, as he stood up. He placed the chair back, still rubbing the side of his head – already, a lump was forming. “At least _pretend_ to care.”  
  
Bookman huffed. “Did you find anything?”  
  
“Not really – at least, nothing we haven’t seen before.” Lavi frowned thoughtfully as he glanced at another pile of books and journals. “I still have more to go through, so I’m hoping to find something. Figured we at least have some time before we go back to Liorea after the examination.”  
  
Bookman eyed the book stacks. “We’ll keep looking, then. If we’re lucky, we may find something. It’s hard to say for certain.”  
  
“You’re telling me.” Lavi leaned with his elbows on the back of the chair. “Kind of crazy – this makes me realize we still don’t know that much about akuma after all. I mean, we know they’re demons created from some sort of dark magic, but…it’s not like we know for sure where they even come from. Only that innocence can kill them.”  
  
“Humans haven’t been in a position where they can study akuma,” Bookman pointed out. “They usually have to be killed immediately, since they can’t easily be contained. And their appearances don’t always have a clear pattern from what we’ve seen, but they tend to attack where innocence is.”  
  
“It would explain why some exorcists have started to disappear,” Lavi mused. “But at the same time it seems kind of strategized.”  
  
As he said this, a thought dawned on him. “You don’t think…it could be someone else, do you? You know, like pulling the strings?” he asked, a hint of unease in his voice. “I mean, isn’t that what happened-?”  
  
“Right now, we can’t be sure of anything,” Bookman said, his tone sharp. “Which is why you need to get back to work.”  
  
“Hey, I’ve been working hard,” Lavi argued, though he was already getting back to the desk. He didn’t trust Bookman not to throw a book at him. “Don’t worry, though – I’m getting back to it.”  
  
Bookman didn’t bother to add anything, leaving Lavi to get back to his research. He glanced around the study, many of the books still untouched.  
  
They had a lot to get through.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The Ilverian city was probably one of the nicest cities he had ever been to. It bustled with life and activity, the citizens pleasant as they went about their daily lives. The streets were filled with vendors selling goods ranging from freshly cut flowers to glistening finery. Musicians played on street corners, laughter filled the air. It would be difficult to find a candidate in such a nice city.  
  
Tyki leaned back against the wall, slightly hidden away in an alley. His hood remained up, the white cloth concealing his appearance as he kept away from the busy streets. Several dark, messy curls threatened to fall forward, his bright yellow eyes scanning the area.  
  
No – he would find someone. There was always a candidate somewhere. There was always someone with potential.  
  
He pulled a cigarette from his lips, exhaling softly. Quietly, he continued to watch the streets, several children playing with a ball-  
  
A child kicked it and the ball rolled over into the alley, stopping just near where Tyki remained. He bent down to take it as a child ran over to the edge of the alley, somewhat hesitant.  
  
Tyki handed the ball out to the child, a friendly smile on his face. “Be careful – you don’t want to lose it.”  
  
The child beamed, nodding his head. He quickly took the ball back, before running to where the rest of his friends were.  
  
Leaning back against the alley wall, Tyki eyed the children as they disappeared into the crowd, more people walking on as they carried about with their day.  
  
Beside Tyki, dark smoke wisped, taking the shape of a black butterfly. Without even looking at it, Tyki spoke. “Don’t worry – we’ll find someone soon.”  
  
The butterfly flapped its wings soundlessly, as it landed on Tyki’s shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s Monday! Well, Monday night. I honestly wasn’t planning to update this quickly, but it’s a short chapter and I had an itch. >.> So I decided to go ahead and just post it.
> 
> This chapter is more transitional - so not too much excitement happens. It’s more dealing with some of the fallout of the akuma attack, while also bringing in that element of a courtship. Honestly, it was something I went back and forth with for a while. The very first version of this AU I drafted was centered around marriage heavily, while the second version completely omitted it. But then the story felt lacking, so it ended up working its way in after all (which, makes sense - Swan Lake’s plot essentially is driven by the idea of love, marriages, and oaths). 
> 
> It also is something of a guilty pleasure because, oh, I love raising the stakes for things like that. XD (Going to be a nice touch of drama for later in too.)
> 
> We did get some glimpses of the Noah, though - they’ll be coming in more later, so be sure to keep an eye out for them. And I know the other halves of our featured ships haven’t appeared yet, but I promise they will show up _very_ soon. ;3
> 
> Thank you so much for reading. <3 Please feel free to leave any more thoughts!


	5. The Arrival of the Lioreans

The dining room was quiet, the gentle clinking of silverware the only noise to fill the air. It wasn’t unusual, as dinner was often a quieter affair. Kanda was never very talkative and Anita wasn’t one to force a conversation if it weren’t warranted. She mostly checked in and asked Kanda how his day was – they didn’t always have breakfast or lunch together due to the busyness of their schedules and it was the one meal Anita always insisted they at least shared together.  
  
Kanda didn’t mind it too much. He usually was able to get away with responding at the bare minimum and would just excuse himself whenever he was finished. That was precisely what he had planned to do tonight, too.  
  
Anita was a bit quieter, he noticed. It wasn’t something Kanda immediately felt alarmed by, and if anything, assumed she just had a lot on her mind. It certainly wouldn’t have been a bother for him to have dinner to go without much conversation – with how things had been the last few weeks, he didn’t feel up to too much talking.  
  
Anita glanced over at Kanda. While she sat at the head of the table, he remained seated to her left, completely unaware of her wary gaze. A glimmer of hesitancy glistened in her eyes before she finally broke the silence. “I spoke with Bookman earlier – he informed me Legory Peck should be arriving in a few days before the examination.”  
  
Kanda grunted in response.  
  
Anita didn’t wait to see if Kanda would say anything more and continued. “I understand you’ve been spending a lot of time preparing for it, but once the examination is over it will be best to have you spend time on some other things. The advisors will be really well-suited to assist you.”  
  
Kanda frowned, the topic already souring his mood. He lowered his fork. “I’m not going to quit exorcism entirely – I still have to train.”  
  
“Yes, but you won’t be training as extensively,” Anita pointed out. “Your safety will have to come first this time – I know it’s frustrating, but this could be a good thing.”  
  
“Tch. I don’t see how,” Kanda mumbled as he looked away.  
  
Anita sighed, already growing tired from the interaction. She took another bite of her food and swallowed. “We’ll have the Midsummer Celebration coming up in a few weeks – that’ll be a good event for you to take a more active role in. You should be engaging with the people more.”  
  
Distaste colored Kanda’s expression, nose scrunching up slightly. The Midsummer Celebration took place a little more than halfway through the summer and usually consisted of a lot of festival activities in the city, while culminating in a ball that was hosted at the castle. It was one of the larger events throughout the year, though Kanda couldn’t say he enjoyed it; he wasn’t comfortable in social environments and formal dances were only a source of stress for him. The thought of having to “engage more with the people” already made the prince want to run off and hide somewhere.  
  
“I’d rather not,” he spoke, words barely audible as he took a drink of water.  
  
Anita exhaled in an admonishing way. “Yuu, it’s to be expected. It would be a good time for you to form some new relationships – especially with the nobles who will be attending.” She paused, her next words carefully selected. “It could be an ideal time for you to meet someone, too – a lot of nobles begin courtships at your age.”  
  
Kanda choked, the sound undignified as he sputtered water. He covered his mouth with the back of his hand, coughing as he caught his breath.  
  
“What?” Kanda ignored the burning discomfort in his throat as he looked at his aunt questioningly, his next words flying from his lips before he could think further. “Why the hell would I need to get into one?”  
  
“ _Language_ , Yuu,” Anita chided, before shaking her head. “Really, you shouldn’t speak in such a way…”  
  
Kanda ignored the criticism, instead focusing on her previous comment. “ _Why_?”  
  
“Yuu.” Anita did well to keep her composure, though her tone turned firm. “No one is expecting anything immediately – but it would be wise for you to start thinking about future prospects. Your coronation is in two years and most royals are engaged by then.”  
  
“So? There’s not a law about it,” Kanda pointed out, as he _attempted_ to keep his tone even. He didn’t understand why his aunt was bringing this topic up now, but his nerves were already scraped raw.  
  
“Yuu, it’s more than that.” Anita met Kanda’s gaze, concern slipping into her eyes. “Even if you’re not an active exorcist, there’s a chance you’ll be needed – and there’s always a risk of something happening. I don’t like to think about it, but there is.”  
  
Her voice trailed off a bit, softening into something more pained – even maternal. Her dark eyes turned pleading, as Anita continued more softly. “If something happens to you, the kingdom won’t have anyone to look over it.”  
  
As the words struck Kanda, he averted his gaze, jaw right and muscles tense. He felt a strong inclination to argue further, but some small sliver of logic nipped his thoughts – this was his aunt he was talking to and as obnoxiously frustrating as it was…  
  
Seeing how quiet he had gone, Anita looked at Kanda. “Please, Yuu. There will be a lot of noblewomen invited to the Midsummer Celebration and you should at least get to know some of them. You could end up meeting someone really nice.”  
  
Heavily, Kanda exhaled. His aunt’s pleading was enough to send a small stab of guilt through his veins, and for a second, he regretted how abrasively he had spoken. But at the same time, thinking about her request was like stepping into quicksand and Kanda knew he wouldn’t be able to talk about it further. Not now.  
  
“I’m tired,” Kanda finally said, as he placed his napkin onto the table. “I’m going to bed.”  
  
Anita nodded, not pushing the topic further.  
  
Kanda stood and left the dining room quickly. He didn’t care if he hadn’t finished dinner – his appetite was lost, and as much as he tried not to think about it, he couldn’t forget what Anita had said. The words had too easily embedded themselves into his thoughts, and he couldn’t stop thinking about them.  
  
Shaking his head, Kanda clenched and unclenched his fist. Mugen – he needed to get Mugen.  
  
Despite what he had told Anita, Kanda only stopped by his room briefly, grabbing his sword before heading straight for the training room. Because of the late hour, the castle was quiet, the bulk of the servants already winding down for the evening. A few guards occasionally roamed the hall, nodding to Kanda in acknowledgement, but aside from that, the corridors felt vast and empty.  
  
Kanda didn’t mind. He always welcomed the quiet.  
  
He arrived at the training room, which was unsurprisingly empty. At such an hour, most people were having dinner or turning in for the evening, though Kanda had almost hoped to have run into Daisya or Marie. He wouldn’t have minded the other exorcists’ company – especially if he wanted a partner to spar with.  
  
No matter – Kanda would be able to train well enough on his own.  
  
He slipped off his jacket, leaving it on a bench. The invisible barrier rippled as he walked into the arena, the vaulted ceiling high as several bright, crystal-like lights remained above.  
  
Kanda removed Mugen from its sheath, activating the sword. It illuminated for a fleeting second, the slightly curved blade turning luminous before it faded.  
  
He began training, beginning with some basic motions to go through. The warm-ups were meditative and Kanda took his time with those, loosening his muscles until he could focus on some higher-level techniques. He just needed to center himself and not think about the examination, about the akuma, _anything_ …  
  
His pace became quicker, as he intensified his movements. Swing, dodge, jump – it was sometimes tricky to envision what an opponent would do without a training partner, but Kanda had done it enough times to manage. He soon fell into a rhythm, and before Kanda knew it, he wasn’t even paying attention to how long he was training for. He just kept working, his muscles growing tired as he fought some invisible fiend.  
  
 _“If anything happens to you, the kingdom won’t have anyone to look after it.”_  
  
Like a fragile piece of glass, his concentration shattered. Kanda stopped, lungs burning as he caught his breath. He was suddenly aware of how hot he felt, the fabric of his sleeveless tunic clinging to his back. He hadn’t realized he had been pushing himself so hard. _‘Damn…’_  
  
Kanda turned, leaving the arena. He stopped at the bench where he had discarded his jacket, pushing it to the edge as he took a seat. A thick, leaden breath escaped him as he rested his face in his hands, his vision momentarily obscured by darkness.  
  
A few minutes. He just needed a few minutes.  
  
“Kanda?”  
  
Kanda looked up sharply. Tiedoll was standing nearby, having just entered into the training room.  
  
“I didn’t expect to see you here,” Tiedoll said. “You’re usually with your aunt around this hour.”  
  
Kanda tensed a bit, the mention of his aunt sending a flurrying of conflicting emotions throughout him. He looked away. “Did you find anything while you were in the woods today?” The question was asked stiffly, and Kanda hoped that the change in conversation would be enough of a distraction for Tiedoll.  
  
Tiedoll eyed Kanda thoughtfully, but answered. “No – nothing unusual. I may see if Marie will go with me next time. He can pick up on things more easily than most of us.”  
  
Kanda nodded as he stood. “Let me know if anything turns up. I hate being the last to find shit out.”  
  
“Don’t worry,” Tiedoll reassured. He took note of Kanda’s somewhat disheveled appearance, gaze wary. “You’ve been pushing yourself again, I can see.”  
  
Kanda frowned. He picked up his jacket, trying his best to ignore the pinch of annoyance he felt at Tiedoll, once more shifting the focus to his training. “I won’t get any better if I don’t practice.”  
  
Tiedoll hummed. “Yes, but it’s important to give yourself time to recover. You did get quite injured just a few weeks ago.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. “Well, I’d be better if everyone would shut up about it.”  
  
Tiedoll chuckled softly. “You may be at a disadvantage – people will always be concerned when it comes to those of royal blood.”  
  
“Tch. _Too_ fucking concerned,” Kanda mumbled, his thoughts once more turning back to the conversation he had had with Anita. “I’m going to lose my mind if people don’t leave me alone about things…”  
  
Tiedoll’s attention lingered on Kanda, expression contemplative. “Is something in particular worrying you?”  
  
Kanda hesitated, the directness of Tiedoll’s question catching him a bit off guard. He swiftly composed himself, brushing off the concern – but he couldn’t quite ignore the way his throat threatened to close up. “Nothing. I just want this damn examination over with.”  
  
The wariness in Tiedoll’s gaze remained, his expression pensive. “Mm. I can imagine – there’s a lot leading up to these.” The general offered a small smile, before continuing. “I doubt you’ll have any trouble passing. You have a high skill level for your age.”  
  
Kanda stiffened a bit, the praise not something he really knew how to take. Stubbornly, he avoided eye contact. “Won’t make a difference if I can’t do much of anything.”  
  
“It won’t be permanent.” Tiedoll’s reassurance remained gentle, the edge to his words almost paternal. “Try not to worry about it so much.”  
  
Kanda bit back a scoff. Permanent. Everyone kept telling him things wouldn’t be _permanent_ …  
  
“I’ll leave you now – but actually get some sleep,” Tiedoll reminded Kanda. “Tomorrow will be a new day.”  
  
The words did little to ease Kanda, but he said nothing as the general left. _‘Tomorrow…’_  
  
Eventually, Kanda also left the training room.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The main road that led through the forest was a winding one, the path at times bumpy and uneven. It was wide and cut through the dense wood and greenery, with just enough sunlight spilling through the richly colored leaves. The warm scent of summer seeped through the forest, the shade cool and soothing for any who traveled along the road.  
  
Hooves beat against the road as several horses pulled along a carriage. It was large and well-made – clearly intended for traveling long distances while offering comfort to the occupants. The wood was dark and inlaid with silver, the emblem of a rose cross visible on the doors.  
  
Along the sides of the carriage, several individuals rode on horseback. Some were guards, the rose cross emblem also marked on their dark uniforms, their weapons close as they continuously monitored their surroundings.  
  
Among them, was an exorcist – a young man with pale skin, shockingly white hair pulled back into a small ponytail at the nape of his neck, and a strange, pentacle mark marring the left side of his face. Like the other guards, he periodically scanned the area, gray eyes alert as he carefully observed for any signs of danger.  
  
Allen gripped the reins of his horse as he turned to the other rider next to him. On his shoulder, a winged, golden orb remained perched. “So far it’s been quiet – looks like we’ll make it into the city without any problem at this rate. Won’t be much longer now.”  
  
The other rider turned – another young man with bright blue eyes and dark, messy hair. Unlike what Allen and some of the guards wore, he wasn’t dressed in any sort of military uniform; his clothes were simple in comparison and the attire of a servant. A plain, loose tunic and slacks, and a faded brown cloak with the hems looking a bit threadbare.  
  
Alma’s expression brightened, his smile lighting up the moment he heard Allen’s words. “Really?” he asked, a hint of excitement in his voice. “After traveling for almost a week, I’m starting to get used to being out here.”  
  
Allen laughed. “You may be, but I doubt Legory is,” he said, gaze flickering to the carriage. “Not that he hasn’t made it clear already.”  
  
“You think we’ll make it by today?” Alma asked.  
  
“Yeah, I think so.” Allen’s attention turned forward. “It’s still pretty early, but if we’re lucky we may make it by the afternoon.”  
  
“That’s so exciting.” Alma’s smile remained bright. “I’ve never been able to travel outside of Liorea before – but everyone always says Ilveria is so pretty.”  
  
“It really has a reputation – I’ve never been either, but based on how the weather has been in this area, I can already see why people would say that. Even the forest is a lot different, especially with all these flowers.”  
  
Alma nodded and looked around. Since traveling from Liorea, he had noticed a slight difference in the plant life already. The forest was lush and the wildflowers they had passed were stunningly vibrant. Alma hadn’t expected the journey to be as scenic as it was, but he was eager to see what the capital city of Ilveria would be like in person.  
  
Quietly, Alma wondered if he would have a chance to explore any part of the city while he was there. He certainly hoped so.  
  
“What is the examination like?” Alma asked, as he turned back to Allen. “You had yours not too long ago, didn’t you?”  
  
Allen nodded. “Yeah – it sort of depends on when they take place for different exorcists. But it’s not too bad. You just get observed while demonstrating different techniques and showing your skill level,” he explained before smiling gently. “It’s a bit intimidating when you’re the one going through it, but this one will be interesting since the Prince of Ilveria is the one being observed this time. I’ve heard he’s a pretty skilled exorcist already.”  
  
As Allen spoke, a hint of longing appeared in Alma’s eyes. “I wish I could watch…”  
  
Allen blinked, glancing at Alma curiously. “You don’t think you’ll be able to? I don’t think Ilveria is as strict about the process and who can watch like Liorea is. From what I’ve heard, it’s more an open event there.”  
  
Alma paused. His attention briefly flickered to the carriage, before he looked forward. “Ah, I don’t think Duke Legory would want me to. I’m lucky he even had me come at all.” He looked back at Allen, and smiled reassuringly. “It’s okay, though – I still may be able to look around. I’d really like to see as much as I can while I’m here.”  
  
A small frown tugged at Allen’s lips. He opened his mouth to speak-  
  
The horses whinnied, their shrill neighing breaking the air. Every horse in the group balked, the guards shouting in surprise as they tried to calm them. A few became so distressed that they started pawing at the ground, throwing their heads back without any unseen cause.  
  
The carriage driver pulled the reins, attempting to calm the horses – but they refused to quiet as their distress festered. “Steady!”  
  
Alma quickly tried to calm his horse, gripping the reins tightly to keep from being thrown off. “Easy, _easy_ -“  
  
“What on earth is going on!?” a voice demanded from the carriage. A man looked out the window, face thin and eyes narrowed in annoyance.  
  
The carriage driver tried to respond, as he called back. “S-Sorry, Your Grace – the horses are spooked by something!”  
  
“Well, calm them _down_ ,” the man demanded, before his attention landed on Alma. “You – make yourself useful and do something!”  
  
Steadying his horse, Alma hopped off. While the other guards handled their own horses, he quickly ran to the two drawing the carriage, which still whinnied and pawed anxiously.  
  
“Hey, _hey_ ,” Alma soothed, as he tried to calm the horses. He was careful to keep his voice even and slowly began to stroke them. “It’s okay, now – there’s nothing bad here.”  
  
The horses still pawed as their hooves dug into the earth, but their movements slowly grew less agitated.  
  
While Alma handled the horses, Allen looked around, the winged orb having taken flight from his shoulder. His left eye shifted, the colors melting into red and black. He scanned the area, the trees…  
  
He didn’t see anything.  
  
Allen frowned, as the orb fluttered back to him. “You see anything, Timcanpy?”  
  
The golden orb shook itself in a “no” motion, its body gleaming before it situated itself back onto Allen’s shoulder.  
  
Allen called out to the rest of the guards. “It doesn’t look like there’s anything out here – we should keep moving.”  
  
The guards nodded and Alma finished helping with the horses drawing the carriage. Once they were calm, he gave them each a final, comforting stroke before returning back to his own horse. He climbed back onto the saddle, just as the group started off again.  
  
As the horses resumed their gait, Allen turned to Alma. “Do you have any idea what upset them? My eye didn’t catch anything.”  
  
Alma shook his head. “No – but it could have been a snake? Or an animal nearby,” he suggested. “Horses are really sensitive. So, maybe that’s all it was?”  
  
Allen hummed thoughtfully. “Maybe…”  
  
They continued on after that, the journey once more turning quiet. With how close they were to their destination, they would hopefully make it without any further obstacles.  
  
On one of the tree branches, a black butterfly watched.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The minutes ticked by slowly as the advisors drawled on. Kanda wasn’t even sure how long he had been trapped in the meeting hall for, but it felt like an eternity. The advisors conversed with one another, going on about something – debt collection methods? Kanda didn’t know; he had stopped paying attention a while ago, the dialogue nothing more than an annoying buzz in his ears.  
  
Kanda sat back, his gaze tempted to wander toward the clock on the wall. However, his aunt remained next to him, the queen regent seemingly invested in the conversation. Swiftly, Kanda took his chance, his attention flickering to the clock across the room.  
  
 _‘Only a half-hour?’_ Kanda silently sucked in a breath. These things always went on for at least an hour minimum and the thought of being there longer caused Kanda to turn restless. On a different day, maybe it would have been bearable, but with how the last few weeks had gone, Kanda’s patience was close to spent. He was tired and then there had been the conversation at dinner the previous night…  
  
Kanda’s muscles tightened at the memory, his gaze wandering toward his aunt.  
  
“Liorea has implemented several rules regarding how they manage debt – from my understanding it’s been effective,” an advisor said. “One is that in the case that someone can’t pay something back due to illness or death, the next of kin is responsible.”  
  
As the advisor said this a small, delicate frown appeared on Anita’s lips. “Would that not be burdensome though?”  
  
“It would, but it would also ensure there is no damage to the economy,” the advisor explained. “It would also allow them to keep any business or property they own, while working to repay the debt – unless it was too substantial to manage otherwise.”  
  
Kanda blinked, having caught the last bit of conversation. Although he didn’t usually care for such topics, something about the current issue didn’t sit well with him. _‘Huh…’_  
  
“We can consider it. But I’d like us to think more before implementing anything such as that – we already have interest policies in place.”  
  
The advisor nodded. “Of course. Should we continue with the next item?”  
  
Anita nodded. “Please.”  
  
A different advisor spoke this time. “We understand that the exorcist general and guards have been patrolling the north woods after the recent akuma sighting – we weren’t sure what other precautions should be taken for those in the city. As of now, nothing is set in place.”  
  
Kanda’s ears perked, the shift in topic abruptly drawing his interest.  
  
Anita sighed. “Yes, we haven’t learned much yet – usually any akuma are much easier to deal with and not as much of a threat,” she noted thoughtfully.  
  
“Should we set something such as a curfew in place? To ensure everyone his home by sundown.”  
  
Kanda frowned at the suggestion. “A curfew won’t stop any akuma attacks,” he pointed out, speaking for the first time that meeting. “That last akuma didn’t exactly care that it was daylight.”  
  
“But it is more at risk at night, isn’t it?” another advisor asked. “A curfew and perhaps some additional security at night may be needed.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything right away, his attention shifting to Anita. His aunt appeared equally pensive. “We’ll speak to the guards and see what their capacity is – I agree we should put something firmer in place until the time being,” she said.  
  
The advisors nodded in agreement.  
  
A heavy knock rapped at the doors, the occupants quieting. Anita looked up, somewhat surprised by the interruption. However, she nodded to the attendant who remained by the doors, silently instructing them to open it.  
  
The attendant did so and a guard walked into the hall. “Ah, I’m sorry for interrupting-“  
  
“That’s alright,” Anita reassured him. “What is it?”  
  
“The Liorean duke and his entourage just arrived – they passed through the gates only a few moments ago.”  
  
“Thank you – please ensure they’re attended to. I’ll be there shortly.” Anita turned to the rest of the advisors. “If there is nothing else that requires immediate attention, I’d like to propose we end this meeting a bit early – we can resume later on.”  
  
The advisors nodded, no one vocalizing any objection.  
  
As everyone began to disperse, Kanda stood up quickly. He didn’t want to get caught by any of the advisors, or his aunt – they hadn’t spoken much since the previous night, with Kanda’s nerves still tender from the conversation.  
  
He only got a step in before Anita spoke.  
  
“Yuu.”  
  
Kanda stopped, silently cursing his luck. Uncertain of what his aunt would ask of him, he turned to her, gaze expectant.  
  
Anita’s expression was the epitome of composure, her voice even as she spoke. “Would you be able to let General Tiedoll know I’d like to meet with him after I speak to our guests?” she asked. “I’d like to see if he has any suggestions on adding security measures.”  
  
Kanda released a breath, the ask being one that was doable. “Sure.”  
  
Anita offered a small, appreciative smile. “Thank you.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything else. He left immediately after, not wanting to test his luck further.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The carriage stopped just before the main entrance of the castle, the guards stopping just beside it. The horses neighed gently, their hooves beating against the ground as their riders descended, taking in the new environment around them.  
  
Alma was in awe, wide-eyed and amazed by the scenery. The forest alone had been pretty, with the city being far lovelier than he could have imagined. Everyone had been so lively and seemed so friendly – more than anything Alma had wanted to explore the capital city and all it had to offer.  
  
His itch to explore was swiftly overshadowed by the castle, though – and by how much it mesmerized him. Unlike Liorea, which had more militant and fortified architecture, the Ilverian castle was practically ethereal. It reminded Alma of a castle in a fairytale and sent a whirlwind of childlike wonder throughout his veins.  
  
“It’s so pretty,” Alma said. He pulled the reins of his horse, having stopped a bit behind the carriage. “It’s a lot different than Liorea.”  
  
Allen nodded in agreement. “Yeah, it really is.” He climbed down from his horse and looked around. “I can see why Lavi likes visiting here. I’ll have to find him.”  
  
Alma turned to Allen, curiosity gleaming in his eyes. “Oh, right! He’s Bookman’s apprentice, isn’t he? You mentioned they were going to be here. I’m sure he’ll be glad to see you.”  
  
“Ah, yeah. I hope,” Allen said, a small smile on his face.  
  
The carriage footman got down from the front, opening the door to help the occupants out. The first to step out was a somewhat short, young man with dark hair pulled back into a ponytail and large dark eyes. He was well-dressed, but nowhere near as sharp in his appearance as the second person to exit.  
  
Legory Peck was not someone who was easy to miss. He looked around, an air of haughtiness to him. The way he stood, the way he moved – he was as proud as a peacock, feathers prim and in place.  
  
Glancing around, Legory’s expression was unimpressed. “So this is Ilveria.” He sighed, the sound bored as he looked around. A few castle attendants had already come out, seemingly prepared to assist them with their belongings, but Legory expected the queen regent would have been present. A bit annoyed, Legory glanced back.  
  
He frowned when he saw Alma and Allen chatting.  
  
Heavily, Legory sighed as he addressed the dark-haired man who had been in the carriage with him. “Matthew – please remind that horse boy of why he’s here and not to be so visible. I don’t need him embarrassing me or causing any trouble.” He huffed quietly. “Honestly, it would have been better if Klaud would have come instead.”  
  
Matthew nodded. “Yes, Your Grace.”  
  
As Matthew left, Legory turned back just as someone exited the castle – the queen regent herself, beautifully dressed and radiant. She approached Legory, he bowed politely. “Your Majesty,” he greeted.  
  
“Duke Legory.” Anita smiled kindly. “I hope your journey was an easy one – I know it was long and we appreciate you coming,” she said. “We have some rooms prepared already that you can be shown to, if you’d like to get settled in.”  
  
Legory offered a smooth, confident smile. “Thank you.” He glanced back toward the carriage, before continuing. “I hope it’s alright – a few extra guards accompanied us as well as an exorcist, due to some security concerns.”  
  
Anita nodded. “I understand – we have plenty of room to spare, so it will be no trouble. Shall I have someone take your horses?”  
  
“We have a stable boy to attend to them, but if someone could show him where to go it would be appreciated. He isn’t the most competent, unfortunately.”  
  
A tiny frown tugged at Anita’s lips, though she made no further comment. Instead, she looked to one of the castle servants. “Would you see that the carriage is situated, and that the stable boy is shown where the horses go?”  
  
The servant nodded.  
  
Back where Alma and Allen were, the two continued to speak, Timcanpy fluttering beside them. “I hope they offer us food soon,” Allen said. “I’m starving…”  
  
Alma giggled. “You’re _always_ starving.”  
  
Allen opened his mouth to retort, but stopped just as he saw Matthew approach them. He looked at the attendant questioningly. “What is it?”  
  
Matthew stopped, and looked at Alma. “Ah, the duke wanted to remind you to keep an eye on the horses,” he said, his own words kinder than what Legory had originally said. “I believe one of the castle servants will show you where to go shortly.”  
  
Alma blinked. “Oh.” He shifted, somehow knowing that the original message had likely been more abrasive. Despite this, he smiled meekly. “Right – I’ll make sure they’re taken care of.”  
  
Matthew nodded, returning back to where Legory was after.  
  
Once the attendant was gone, Allen turned to Alma. “Do you want me to go with you?” he asked, words a little gentler.  
  
Alma shook his head, his smile reassuring. “That’s okay! I know you need to get settled in and want to see your friend. Anyways, I’ll probably have to stay in a room closer to the stables.”  
  
“If you’re sure.” Allen smiled back, as he glanced at Timcanpy. “Tim and I will find you later – maybe we can get some time to sneak some sights in. Looks like they have a lot of gardens here.”  
  
Alma’s eyes brightened at the offer. He nodded his head eagerly, the prospect of getting to look around more than a little enticing. “Okay!”  
  
If anything, maybe something good would come from this visit.  
  
  


* * *

  
Kanda huffed. After leaving the meeting hall, he had not been able to find Tiedoll. He had tried some of the usual spots: outside in the gardens, some of the studies, a room where he occasionally painted as a distraction. Kanda couldn’t find the man though and wondered if he may have gone out again on another patrol.  
  
 _‘The one time I need to find him,’_ Kanda thought, as he glanced into the training room. Some guards were practicing, but that was it.  
  
Shaking his head, finally Kanda shrugged it off. It was annoying, but he was bound to come across Tiedoll at some point – and even if he didn’t, there was a good chance he’d run into Daisya or Marie.  
  
He crossed his arms as he watched the guards train, thoughts churning as he mused back on the conversation that had taken place with the advisors. As much as it annoyed him, they _had_ had a point – even if akuma still attacked during the day, they did tend to be more active at night. But would extra security be enough? The Ilverian unit was small, with only four exorcists – three, if now Kanda was excluded.  
  
 _‘The akuma have never come into the cities before,’_ he thought, as he watched one guard attack another with a sword. _‘Damn, we don’t even know that much about what they want…’_  
  
A guard grunted as he was thrown back. He fell against the barrier that locked the trainees into the arena, the air rippling around him.  
  
Kanda paused, a thought crossing through his mind. He turned, leaving the training room.  
  
He turned down a corridor, pace brisk. He may not have been sure where Tiedoll or any of the other exorcists were, but he knew where one other person would be.  
  
The library was quiet when Kanda arrived. He slipped in unnoticed, with the few scholars inside too engrossed in whatever texts they were reading. Kanda wove through the aisles, the scent of musty leather tickling his nose as his eyes scanned the area.  
  
He wandered for a bit, but soon found what he was looking for: a hall that broke off from the main library into where some back rooms were. The area was noticeably darker, a few glass lights hanging on the walls as flames burned within, not a window to be seen.  
  
Kanda stopped at a door: a heavy wooden one that looked as though it had seen better days. He didn’t bother to knock, pulling the knob as he looked inside.  
  
A soft snore broke the silence and Kanda turned as he stepped into the room, old texts lining the walls and dust collecting in the corners. There were two desks, both looking as though a tornado had torn across them, with Lavi asleep at one, out cold.  
  
Kanda released an annoyed sigh. He walked over to where Lavi was asleep, shoving his shoulders. “Hey. Wake up.”  
  
Lavi’s head shot up, red hair mussed and sticking up in all sorts of strange angles. “Wha-?”  
  
“You’re fucking drooling everywhere,” Kanda pointed out, a hint of disgust in his voice.  
  
“Huh – oh, damn.”  
  
Lavi sat more upright, his coherency returning. He ran his hand through his hair, his one good eye blinking. “Ugh, I was up way too late last night…” he said, before looking at Kanda. Confusion brimmed in his eye. “Um, what are you doing here?”  
  
Kanda shut the door behind him and crossed his arms. “I need to ask you something.”  
  
Lavi blinked in surprise. “You came to ask me something?” he repeated, before grinning widely. “Well, ask away. You know I’m a fountain of knowledge!”  
  
Kanda snorted. “What’s Liorea doing with their security right now?”  
  
Lavi leaned back in his hair, arms folded behind his head. “Liorea? Well, to be honest, it’s not like they had to change much. The city has a wall that circles the whole kingdom, so unless you go through the main gates there’s not many other ways to get through.” He sighed, gaze turning thoughtful. “The walls are enhanced with sigils, though – to help ensure that they can’t be easily destroyed.”  
  
Kanda thought, his gaze averting slightly. Ilveria wasn’t as militant or fortified in its structure as Liorea, leaving them a bit more open. Since they had so many lakes and mountains, they had always relied on those as natural defenses, but they wouldn’t do much against increasing akuma activity. Constructing a wall wouldn’t be practical either, nor would it be possible in a short timeframe.  
  
Kanda leaned back against the wall. “Could the same sort of sigils be used on the ground?” he asked. “To create a barrier so nothing like akuma could come in.”  
  
Lavi paused, thinking. He leaned forward, his elbows resting on the desk. “You know…I think? But they’d need to have something to anchor them into the ground.” Inquisitively, he eyed Kanda. “Are you guys thinking of upping security?”  
  
“Tch. We can’t exactly leave people at risk…”  
  
“Hey, it’s a smart idea. I’m just surprised it came from you,” Lavi said, before noticing the scathing _glare_ Kanda just sent him. “What? You’re just always so focused on training and exorcism every time I visit.”  
  
Kanda scowled, looking away. “It’s not like I’m going to have that option much longer,” he mumbled, the words slipping out without him thinking about it.  
  
Lavi raised an eyebrow. “Huh?”  
  
Kanda caught himself, and stiffened. “Nothing,” he said, as he pulled the door open.  
  
“Wait! Is that all you needed?” Lavi asked. “At least say thank you!”  
  
Kanda ignored Lavi, promptly shutting the door behind him.  
  
Lavi exhaled, shoulders slumping. He wasn’t surprised by the brusque departure; it was Kanda’s nature to be abrupt in that way.  
  
Turning back to the desk, Lavi looked at the documents strewn out before him. Journals, texts, random pieces – he had been up all the previous night looking through things. But his search had borne no real results; everything Lavi found on the akuma were the same. That they were demons. That they were composed of some sort of dark magic that humans couldn’t quite control. That they were somehow tied to pain, and grief…  
  
Lavi frowned, as he moved aside several folders. Among them was one journal, old and frayed, the sheets stained with age. It was one Lavi had discovered just before passing out, so he had not had a chance to look at it until now.  
  
Carefully, he flipped open the journal, the heavy scent of wear and musk making him cough. “Geez, these are neglected…”  
  
He trailed off, his green eye scanning the page. The text was old, and written in a dialect that was no longer used. Lavi was able to translate with ease though, his finger tracing along the words, as he followed them.  
  
 _Noah._  
  
Lavi stilled. He recognized the word and realized that the text must have been one of _those_ journals – the ones that accounted for that part of history that was rarely discussed anymore. Well over a century later, and those stories were already deeply buried. They were buried, just as the ones they spoke of…  
  
Lavi rested his chin in the palm of his hand. _‘All those years,’_ he thought, an idea slipping into his consciousness. _‘Nah, it couldn’t be them…’_  
  
Taking the journal, Lavi set it aside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Alma and Allen are here! ^o^
> 
> I’ve been itching to get those two into this story, though honestly getting them in at chapter 5 is progress for me (unlike *cough*other fics*cough*like EiG*cough* where it took 12 chapters for the other half of the ship to show up >.> ). I really like them both in this AU, too - they’re already good friends, and it’s been fun writing them as being from a different kingdom rather than Ilveria. There are a lot of differences to explore there, especially considering how characters like Kanda and Alma interact later on. (Which, will be soon...!)
> 
> I also realize it’s probably still a bit unclear how this is based off Swan Lake, considering Alma is a stable boy - but I promise there will be some parallels that come in soon. ;3
> 
> I don’t have too many other notes for this chapter, aside from that I really enjoyed writing this one. I’m still fairly ahead with this fic (I’m working on chapter 16 at the moment) - depending on how things go, I might post chapter 6 sooner? (It’s a whirlwind, and I’m excited to share it.) My focus has been sort of off, but I’m trying to plow through this story. >:3
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Thank you for reading. <3


	6. The Stable Boy

“I hope you’ll be comfortable during your stay,” Anita said as she finished escorting Legory around the castle. Since the duke had never visited Ilveria before, she had taken the liberty to show him the main rooms, including the dining hall and throne room. They finally ended up back near the front entry way of the castle, the grand, marble staircase behind them. “You must be tired by now – but perhaps at some point I can show you the training facilities.”  
  
Legory hummed. “Yes, that would be good – I’d like to observe where the exorcists train and make sure things are up to par. Is that where the examination will also take place?”  
  
“We have a separate area reserved outside for that,” Anita answered. “It’s larger and will allow for a wider audience. We always keep our examinations open to the public to show support for the exorcists.”  
  
Legory’s lips pressed into a thin line, his light brown eyes turning mildly pejorative. “Ah, I forget that here you have more…open events,” he mused, careful in the selection of his words. “It must be quite the ordeal for them.”  
  
For a split second, Anita’s expression shifted, turning a hint more formal. “They look forward to it. We like to include our people in all the ways that we can – it creates a strong sense of community within the kingdom.”  
  
“I see.” Legory’s gaze moved around the castle. “I’m looking forward to meeting Prince Yuu and seeing what his skillset is.”  
  
“You’ll meet him tonight at dinner.” Anita’s eyes flickered, as she caught Mahoja exiting from a corridor. Returning her attention to Legory, she smiled politely, expression measured. “Unfortunately, I’ll have to attend to some other matters now – but please, let the servants know if you need anything at all.”   
  
Legory nodded. “Of course, Your Majesty.”  
  
Anita motioned for a servant nearby, gently asking them to escort the duke to his chambers. They nodded, bowing in respect before doing so.  
  
Once Legory had walked up the stairs, Anita approached Mahoja.  
  
“Didn’t mean to interrupt,” Mahoja said.   
  
Anita shook her head, smiling fondly. “No, it was much needed.”  
  
They began walking, turning down one of the corridors. The windows along the east side were bright, the velvet curtains pulled back to allow the warmth of the sunlight in. Castle staff moved along the halls, going about their day to day activities, but otherwise left Anita and Mahoja alone.  
  
Mahoja tilted her face toward Anita. “How was he?”  
  
Anita sighed. “He has some distinctive views,” she spoke, before looking back at Mahoja reassuringly. “I think it should be fine though.”  
  
She stopped walking and turned to face Mahoja more directly. “By any chance, have you seen General Tiedoll?” Anita asked. “I wanted to speak to him. I had asked Yuu to find him in the meantime, but I wasn’t certain if he had.”  
  
“I think he was outside with Marie earlier.” Mahoja hesitated, her next question asked a bit more quietly. “Did you talk to Kanda?”  
  
Although the inquiry was vague, Anita immediately understood what Mahoja was referring to – the possibility of a courtship. A small, almost weary breath escaped her. “I did.”  
  
Mahoja frowned. “And…?”  
  
“He didn’t take well to the idea. Though, I can’t say I’m surprised,” Anita explained. “I probably should have waited until the examination passed, but I hope that if the idea is there, he’ll be more open to it by the time of the Midsummer Celebration.”  
  
“He’ll need time,” Mahoja said, shrugging slightly. “I don’t think romance has ever been too high on his priority list.”  
  
“It hasn’t.” Anita’s lips curved into a small smile. “I probably shouldn’t expect anything anytime soon. But it would be nice to eventually have some good news with everything that’s been happening lately.”  
  
“I’m sure something will turn up,” Mahoja spoke, words turning soft. “Whatever it is. Something will happen.”  
  
Anita met Mahoja’s gaze and nodded. “Yes – I’m sure you’re right.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Melodies spilled into the air, rippling gently like silver bells. The strings extended from the rings on Marie’s fingers, vibrating as he pulled. They fell to the ground, his left hand tugging at the strings as he plucked them, softly playing as he listened to the outside practice ensue.  
  
 _“Charity Bell!”_  
  
Daisya kicked his anti-akuma weapon, the metallic ball sparking as it whizzed through the air like a bullet across the open, grassy field. However, the attack was deflected as a barrier of ivory vines broke through the ground. The ball ricocheted, whirling back toward where Daisya was before he caught it.  
  
“Ugh, I thought I had it that time,” Daisya moaned.  
  
Tiedoll watched, having stood at the other end of the field. He had brought Daisya and Marie outside for some additional practice, the open playing field on the south end of the castle grounds far more spacious for their attacks. The field was an arena with raised seating platforms encircling it, all currently vacant.  
  
“You have to observe every detail and be prepared for when you’re caught off guard.” Tiedoll smiled, eyes kind. “We can try again.”  
  
Daisya kicked his weapon around, grinning at the offer. “Yeah – I’m sure this time I’ll knock down whatever you set up.”  
  
Tiedoll chuckled softly as Daisya readied himself for another practice round. Using his innocence, Tiedoll motioned toward the ivory wall, willing it to disappear back into the earth – but stopped just as he saw Kanda approaching.  
  
Turning toward the north end of the field, Tiedoll smiled. “Ah, I’m glad you found us – we were working on some techniques for traps,” he said, as Kanda stopped just before him. “Did your meeting go well?”  
  
Kanda shrugged. “Fine. Took forever to find you guys, though,” he grumbled. “Anita wants to speak to you when you have time. About looking at new security measures.”  
  
Tiedoll’s expression turned more serious, as he turned to face Kanda directly. “I see. Did she say what she had in mind?”  
  
“Tch. The advisors mentioned a curfew and maybe more soldiers patrolling the area.”   
  
“You don’t seem to like the idea very much,” Tiedoll nodded, somewhat curiously as he raised an eyebrow. “Were you thinking of another alternative?”  
  
Kanda paused, the question placing a sudden amount of pressure on him. Quickly, he shook off the sensation as he crossed his arms. “I wanted to find out if seals would work better. Like what we use in the indoor training rooms,” he finally said, words somewhat stiff. “Except geared toward blocking akuma. Liorea has something similar with their city walls.”  
  
Tiedoll hummed thoughtfully. “That may work…though Ilveria isn’t encompassed by a wall as Liorea is. We would need to find areas in the ground where the sigils wouldn’t erode – landmarks, perhaps. Maybe we should go out and look.” He glanced back toward where Marie was on the sidelines. “Marie – is that something you may be able to help with?”  
  
Marie angled his face toward Tiedoll and nodded. “Do you want to go scout soon?”  
  
“That’s a good idea – I was going to have to go out for a patrol, anyways.”  
  
Kanda looked at Tiedoll. “I should come-“  
  
Tiedoll turned back to the prince, expression shifting into one of concern. “Kanda, I’m not sure if you should this time.”  
  
Kanda frowned. “Why?”  
  
The general sighed. “After what happened last time, your aunt made it clear she didn’t want you in harm’s way – and we need to respect that.”   
  
Despite Tiedoll’s reasoning, Kanda only grew incensed by the words. “I’m not putting myself at _risk_. It’s not like I’m going after an akuma!”  
  
“We may not be going after an akuma, but that doesn’t mean one won’t be out there.” Tiedoll’s gaze softened, as his tone turned into something almost paternal. “We still don’t know what exactly is going on and we don’t want to be caught off guard. We can’t allow anything else to happen to you.”  
  
Tiedoll’s words burned into Kanda’s ears, a sharp pang of bitterness seeping into his chest. Abruptly, he looked away. Whether or not Tiedoll had meant to do so, the words had been demeaning; they made Kanda feel like some child who couldn’t defend himself, when he was so much more capable than that. He wasn’t just some prince who needed to be protected. He wasn’t _useless_.  
  
Kanda didn’t respond, and Tiedoll took a step back. Exhaling, he turned to Marie. “Marie – we should go soon. Daisya, stay here.”  
  
“What?” Daisya stopped his kicking, having been playing with his weapon like a toy for the last five minutes. “Why do I have to stay back? It’s not like _I’m_ royalty.”  
  
Kanda glared back at Daisya. Tiedoll sighed. “We always should have at least one active exorcist in the unit at the castle. But, I promise either Marie or I can stay the next time.”  
  
“Ugh. Lame, but okay,” Daisya said. “Just don’t be too long, or I’ll be bored out of my mind.”  
  
“You’ll be fine.” Tiedoll looked back at Kanda. “Don’t worry – we’ll let you know what we find. I can speak with your aunt after about it.”  
  
Kanda didn’t bother to say anything back, though he felt Tiedoll’s gaze on him. He was too agitated to acknowledge the general and didn’t even spare a glance as he heard Tiedoll and Marie walk off the field.  
  
Once they were out of earshot, Daisya approached Kanda. “Hey,” he started, as he held his weapon against his hip. “Don’t take it so personally – you know Tiedoll’s not really in a position to go against royal command.”  
  
Kanda sneered. “It’s not like my aunt _ordered_ him to keep me out of shit.”  
  
“Nah, but she did make it clear she didn’t want you to be as active an exorcist,” Daisya said, before adding thoughtfully, “Though…technically you _are_ crown prince. I mean, that has some weight to it, doesn’t it? I’d probably just sneak out if I were you.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. Sneak out. As if he’d do _that_ -  
  
A beat passed, and he thought.  
  
Quickly, Kanda rounded on his heel, as he started back toward the castle.  
  
Daisya blinked, perplexed by the abrupt departure. “Hey! Where are you going?”  
  
Kanda didn’t answer.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The stables were large, well-maintained and expansive. Located on the northwest corner of the castle grounds, there were several wooden buildings, all elongated and divided into gated stalls. Each one was occupied, a horse nestled into each stall comfortably. The exception was for the spaces reserved for horses belonging to visitors - most of which were empty.  
  
Alma finished situating the last of the horses into one of the guest stalls. He ran a hand along the creature’s muzzle, as he smiled at it gently. “There – you can rest here now. We won’t have to travel back for a while.”  
  
The horse whinnied, shaking its long, dark mane.   
  
Alma laughed. “I’ll take it that means you’re happy with that idea.” He glanced back toward the stable exit before turning back toward the horse. “I’ll get some food and water – I know you and the others are probably hungry after all the walking today.”  
  
The horse didn’t respond, and Alma closed the gate.   
  
The Ilverian servant who had shown Alma where to go had been nice, doing well to point Alma in the direction of where the horses could be situated. The group had traveled with seven total and Alma had been grateful they would all be able to stay in stalls next to one another. It would make caring for them a lot easier, since he had been tasked with doing so during the trip. He would still need to feed them, make sure they were groomed, then keep an eye on them while traveling in case any injuries occurred…  
  
It was a lot of work, but Alma didn’t mind. If anything, it had allowed him the opportunity to visit somewhere new.  
  
As Alma exited the stables, he glanced up. His gaze wandered in the direction of the city, a wistful gleam flickering in his eyes. He hoped he would have a chance to look around when he wasn’t caring for the horses. The examination technically wouldn’t be for almost a week, so Alma would have until then to do so.  
  
 _‘Maybe once I get the horses settled,’_ Alma thought, as he walked over to an old, metal handpump. He grabbed a nearby bucket and began to pump the handle, water spilling out as the metal squeaked. _‘Duke Legory should be busy getting settled in and I don’t think anyone would bother to check on me today…’_  
  
As Alma thought this, a hint of nervousness nipped at him. He didn’t want to leave only to have someone think he wasn’t doing his job – if it got reported to Legory, the duke would be furious. He had already made it clear that he wasn’t pleased with Alma having come to begin with and the stable boy knew the reason why.  
  
Alma bit his lip. He tried to ignore the unease that accompanied such thoughts and focus on the task at hand. Carefully, he picked up the bucket, the water sloshing around loudly. The bucket was a bit heavier than he anticipated and Alma realized he had filled it too high. Regardless, he lifted it, the weight straining his shoulders.  
  
“Ugh.” Alma hauled the bucket along, turning around the corner as he headed back to the where the horses were being kept-  
  
Someone swiftly rounded the corner just as Alma did. Before he knew what happened, the force of the collision knocked him back, the bucket of water splashing all over. Alma quickly tried to steady himself, scrambling to catch the bucket. But the damage was done, with more than half the water spilled.  
  
“ _Fuck_.”  
  
Alma looked up, finally catching sight of who he had just collided with. He was no older than Alma, with long dark hair that was pulled back into a ponytail. The young man was dressed in simple, dark clothing and had a cloak on – all well-made and high quality fabrics from what Alma could see and far nicer than what a regular servant would ever be lucky enough to wear.   
  
He was also now soaked and glowering at Alma darkly.  
  
“I’m – I’m so sorry,” Alma stammered, feeling a rush of embarrassment. Whoever this person was, it didn’t look well that Alma – a _servant from a visiting kingdom_ – had just spilled water all over him. Especially when Alma had only gotten slightly wet in comparison. “You just came around the corner so quickly and the bucket was heavy-“  
  
“Tch. It’s fine,” the young man grumbled. His face twisted in disgust despite his words, the front of his dark blue jacket sticking against his skin. Somewhat agitatedly, he took his cloak and jacket off, revealing a black, sleeveless tunic underneath.  
  
It was then Alma noticed the sword the man was carrying.  
  
Alma shifted uncomfortably – had he just doused some high-ranking soldier? His eyes darted back toward the stables, before he recalled where some towels were kept. “Oh! Wait here.”   
  
He didn’t wait for the young man to respond. Alma hurried into the stables, running toward the back where a few supplies were stored. Sure enough, a few towels remained. Alma snatched several and quickly ran outside.  
  
“Here,” Alma said, as he handed over a towel. He smiled weakly. “Um, they’re usually used for the horses, but they should help soak up the water.”  
  
The young man took a towel, staring at it blankly for a second. Shrugging, he used it to dry what he could. “I need a horse ready,” he said, tone exasperated.  
  
Alma blinked, at first confused. However, he soon caught on, and responded awkwardly. “Um, well technically I only manage the horses from Liorea. I’m just here until after the examination.” Somewhat tentatively, Alma looked at the stranger. “Ah, do you need help? One of the other servants showed me around just a little while ago, so I could get one saddled. I know the horse master here stepped out a little while ago to check on some things.”  
  
The young man paused, a perplexed frown on his face. He shook his head. “It’s fine. I’ll just do it myself,” he mumbled, before starting over to where some of the other stables were.  
  
Alma watched. A hint of curiosity brimming in his eyes, he followed where the young man had gone and saw him go into one of the stalls. He had already grabbed a saddle and was moving to place it onto the horse’s back; the horse snorted as it pulled away, the young man scowling in response.  
  
Realizing what was wrong, Alma approached. “Here.“  
  
The young man looked back at Alma, annoyed. “I said I’ll do it-“  
  
Alma ignored him. “You have to brush them first,” he said, as he slipped the saddle off. Going over to the wall where some tools remained, he took a circular brush. “If you don’t, the hairs get messed up and won’t lie flat correctly – it makes them uncomfortable, and will make them more agitated later on.”  
  
He brushed down the hairs on the horse’s back as he spoke, his touch gentle. Once Alma was satisfied, he picked up the saddle and placed it onto the horse, securing the leather straps for the stranger. He turned back and smiled. “There – just like that.”  
  
The young man flushed. He stubbornly avoided eye contact as he took the reins. “I could have done that.”  
  
Alma blinked. “I didn’t mean it like you couldn’t…I just have seen people saddle horses incorrectly before and then they hurt themselves.”  
  
Sharply, the young man turned back toward Alma. “I wouldn’t have _hurt_ myself,” he snapped, gaze suddenly scathing.   
  
Alma shut his mouth, completely taken aback at the outburst. He hadn’t expected such a heated reaction and the words had been so scalding that they had nearly stunned him. “I-I didn’t mean it like that,” he tried to explain. “I just wanted to make sure-“  
  
A sneer cut him off, the young man taking the reins of the horse and grabbing his cloak. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about,” he spoke, words low and acidic.   
  
Throat dry, Alma rubbed his wrist. “I…” He tried to speak, but the words failed him.   
  
Abruptly, the young man turned. He gripped the reins of the horse tightly, leading the beast out of the stables.  
  
Alma looked up. The young man had already left, mounting the horse and riding off. Once he was out of sight, Alma released a breath, shoulders heavy. He looked around the stables-  
  
He stopped. Along the gate to the stall, the towel had been hung that the young man had used – and his jacket.  
  
Biting his lip, Alma picked up the dark blue fabric. _‘He must have forgotten it…’_ he thought, the garment still wet. He exhaled.  
  
Alma hadn’t even been in Ilveria for a full day and he was already making mistakes.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The city bustled with life. Streets remained crowded, with people walking along the sides as horses pulled carts down the center, the flow of traffic steady as it wove through the throng of people. Shop windows had been left open, many of the storefronts lined with fresh flowers; some vendors even had placed displays outside, in hopes of attracting customers.  
  
Tyki leaned forward, his arms resting against the bar. He had taken refuge in a pub – a smaller one that was a bit less crowded. Most people seemed to be taking advantage of the lovely weather, spending time with their loved ones in the warmth of the sun. Tyki couldn’t blame them.  
  
He pressed onto his elbows, drink half-gone. His gaze shifted to the window as he watched pedestrians passing by, their laughter blissful and ignorant.   
  
“Did you want anything else?” the server asked behind the counter. “You’ve been here a while – were you waiting for someone?”  
  
Tyki hummed. As he looked out the window, he noticed one individual passing by – a cloaked man on horseback, identity seemingly concealed.   
  
Amber eyes bright, Tyki watched the rider go on, lips tugging upward.  
  
“Nah,” he answered. “Just looking around.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda moved through the city swiftly. He kept to the sides of the roads, avoiding any pedestrians as he guided his horse along. The air filled with chatter, the noise grating against his ears; he didn’t enjoy being in crowded spaces, but cutting through the city was inevitable. He only had to keep to the main road, though, and he would be on the outskirts of the city limits shortly.   
  
Carefully, Kanda kept the hood of his cloak pulled up. He had dressed plainly before leaving, but didn’t want to risk being recognized.  
  
Luck was on his side. Kanda made it through the city without any interference, crossing into the fields. Farmers worked in the distance, tending to their crops and cattle. Up above, the sun’s rays spilled down, blanketing the earth in a comforting warmth. Kanda was actually grateful – his clothes were still damp from his earlier run in with the stable boy.  
  
 _‘What a pain,’_ Kanda thought. He was still aggravated from the experience, the stable boy having grated on the last of his nerves. Spilling water on Kanda, then running his mouth – how had he managed to get employed anywhere?  
  
Kanda shook his head, pushing the thoughts of the stable boy from his mind. He scanned the area instead, searching the fields for any signs of Tiedoll and Marie.  
  
 _‘Not here,’_ he thought, a small frown painting his face. He knew that Tiedoll and Marie had left to look for landmarks along the kingdom's outskirts, but Kanda realized he wasn’t sure where exactly they had started first. A bit annoyed, he leaned his body forward, the horse trotting along.  
  
Technically, it would have been better for Kanda not to run into them. He was already breaking protocol with having ventured out on his own – something that royals were never supposed to do. He honestly hated it. For as long as he could remember, someone had always been close by. Hovering. _Watching_. It was exhausting, and even as a child, Kanda had taken to sneaking into lesser known parts of the castle grounds and hiding whenever he could.  
  
He just couldn’t stand being smothered.  
  
Kanda’s shoulders relaxed, the fresh air cool and clear. The hum of the kingdom faded behind him as a breeze brushed past, the grass rippling softly across the terrain. For a rare, precious few seconds Kanda felt calm; he didn’t feel the weight of everyone’s expectations, or of the responsibilities that he was being shouldered with. He didn’t have to think about tedious meetings, or strategizing, or courtships…  
  
In the blink of an eye, he remembered he wasn’t free of any of it.   
  
The realization was a startling blow, pressing onto his chest like a ton of bricks. Tensely, Kanda clasped at the reins, the horse having slowed to a stop. He didn’t bother to cue the horse to continue, instead opting to stay there for a moment in the open field. He just wanted some time. Some _space_. _  
  
_Exhaling, Kanda shook his head. Landmarks. He had come out to look for landmarks to attach sigils to and that’s what he needed to focus on. Even if Tiedoll and Marie found some, there was a chance Kanda would find others on his own – and the more they had, the better.  
  
Kanda cued the horse to continue, as they left the main road. His dark blue eyes scanned the outskirts of the kingdom, the forest visible not far off. Mountains lingered in the distance, the tips capped white with snow against the vibrant, cerulean sky.  
  
 _‘There has to be something,_ ’ Kanda thought as he returned his focus to the ground. Before the forest started, there weren’t many other trees – there was only the soft soil of the earth. Kanda wondered if they would have to plant something more solid if they used sigils – like stones.  
  
As the thought trickled through his mind, Kanda frowned. No, stones may not work – they would need to make sure whatever was placed couldn’t be moved easily.  
  
 _‘Maybe…’_ Kanda’s gaze shifted to the forest. Taking a breath, he continued in that direction.  
  
The forest was quiet as Kanda approached it. He didn’t bother to stop and tie his horse up, instead venturing into the first few trees. Could the outskirts of the forest be used? _‘It’d be better than soil. Talismans could be used here-’_  
  
Kanda stilled.  
  
He didn’t know if he had actually heard it at first or if it had been something else. A snap of a twig, a crunch of a leaf. Perhaps, he had been so engrossed in his own thoughts that he had misheard.  
  
But, he heard it again. A giggle.  
  
Kanda tensed. He pulled the reins back, his horse stopping as he looked around and the hood of his cloak still up. The forest was still, sunlight speckling throughout the canopy of leaves above. He didn’t see anything or anyone.  
  
 _“Prince Yuu…”  
  
_ Muscles rigid, Kanda’s hand reached for the hilt of his sword, his gaze darting around as he tried to find the source of the speaker.  
  
The air fell silent once more.  
  
Kanda didn’t move, completely still. Even his horse had grown motionless, the soundlessness of the forest deafening. _‘What-?’_  
  
An explosion blasted from Kanda’s left, the horse kicking back as it neighed shrilly. He held on tightly to keep from being thrown off, his sword drawn as he activated Mugen. Smoke obscured his vision, but through the cloud of smog Kanda saw something-  
  
An akuma.  
  
It wasn’t like the one before. Not that terrible, winged monstrosity that Kanda had faced. No, this akuma had an elongated body, face thin and pointed with skeletal limbs and a tail extending from its spine. Its eyes were nothing more than slits, and its nose nonexistent; it didn’t even have a mouth from what Kanda could see.  
  
In the center of its body, a circle remained. It looked like a flower opening up…  
  
Kanda realized the akuma was about to attack.  
  
He jumped off his horse, slapping it to make sure it ran back to the field. The horse galloped off, Kanda dodging just as the akuma blasted an attack, his body skidding against the ground.   
  
The akuma crawled toward him at a terrifying speed and Kanda blocked with his sword as a clawed hand struck at him. He pulled his sword, slicing into the akuma’s flesh as it hissed.   
  
“Get the _fuck off_!” he seethed. The akuma backed off and Kanda took his chance, standing as he readied another attack.  
  
Quickly, Kanda charged. The hole on the akuma’s abdomen had opened, with what looked like another blast beginning to form-  
  
Kanda shoved his sword into the akuma’s chest before it could do anything else.  
  
“ _Kanda_!”  
  
Kanda pulled Mugen out, the akuma collapsing to the ground as it withered, body shriveling and twisting. He released a thick, weighty breath and turned around.  
  
Tiedoll ran up to Kanda. He was also cloaked, hood down and expression panicked and fraught with worry. In his grasp, he had his staff and cross, both weapons activated.  
  
“What happened?” he asked, the general’s voice far more alarmed than Kanda had ever heard.   
  
Unexpectedly, Kanda froze up a bit. Tiedoll had always been one to fret over him in an annoyingly fatherly way, but this went beyond anything that Kanda had ever really experienced before. Tiedoll’s expression was just so worn, and he looked...  
  
“It was just one akuma,” Kanda finally managed, though his speech was stiff. “It’s fine now-“  
  
Tiedoll’s gaze shifted to the akuma’s remains behind Kanda, the body still. Within the blink of an eye, the general’s expression shifted, turning more severe. “Let’s take you back to the castle – Marie is with the horses. We stopped yours before it got too far.”  
  
Kanda looked back, brow furrowing slightly. “I’m already out here-“  
  
“ _Yuu_.” Tiedoll turned, voice firm. His eyes were equally intense as he locked gazes with the prince. “Please, do not make me repeat myself again.”  
  
Kanda’s mouth shut. He stared mutely as the general turned away, heading back out of the forest without another word.  
  
Kanda had never seen him look so disappointed.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“What were you _thinking_?”   
  
Mahoja’s voice boomed into Kanda’s ears thunderously. He shut his eyes, teeth gritted as he fought the mounting irritation that simmered in his veins. It took every ounce of willpower Kanda had not to shout back. He was quickly running low on patience – especially with how intensely he was being interrogated.  
  
Anita looked at Kanda, expression wrought with concern. She remained seated on the throne, Mahoja and Bookman standing to her left. Tiedoll had brought Kanda into the room only moments ago.  
  
“Do you have any idea how _reckless_ your actions were?” Mahoja continued. “What if you were injured?”  
  
Unable to take the prodding, Kanda turned back toward Mahoja and glared. “I don’t know why you’re making such a big deal when nothing actually happened-“  
  
“You know perfectly well that something _did_ happen,” Bookman pointed out, speaking for the first time since Kanda had been dragged into the throne room. “And after what happened last time you were out, you’re very lucky to be alive right now. This isn’t something to be taken lightly.”  
  
Kanda’s face heated. It was one thing to have Mahoja criticize him, but it was another to have _Bookman_ giving him flak. And Tiedoll…  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, his focus zoomed in on the general. Tiedoll hadn’t said anything to Kanda since they had returned. He had only explained what had happened to the others – but ever since, he had been quiet.  
  
Anita continued to watch her nephew, chest tight. “Yuu…” Her words were far gentler than those of everyone else who had spoken, yet simultaneously carried a weight held by gossamer threads. “Yuu, why would you put yourself in danger like that? You _know_ better.”  
  
Kanda locked gazes with her, his insides knotting. His throat remained dry, though, and he swiftly looked away.  
  
Bookman released a breath. “It would be wise to make sure no one hears of this – it won’t reflect well considering we have Legory Peck visiting.” He turned back to Anita, expression severe. “The duke isn’t someone who would find this behavior acceptable and it would be potentially damaging if he were to relay this back to King Lvellie in Liorea.”  
  
Kanda’s eyes flashed, the words striking a sharp chord. “What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?”  
  
Bookman’s dark eyes met Kanda’s, his stance unwavering. “It means that if you aren’t more cautious in how you act, people won’t believe you’re fit to rule. Which is something you should be thinking about more.”  
  
The words were sharp – so much so that Kanda didn’t know how to respond at first. He’d seen Bookman use his sharp tongue with Lavi, but never had been the target of such a scalding remark.  
  
Anita looked between the two, the tension in the room palpable. Somewhat sternly, she spoke to the others. “Please leave us. I’d like to speak to Yuu alone.”  
  
Bookman and Tiedoll nodded, though Mahoja appeared hesitant. A hint of worry flickered in her eyes as she glanced at Anita, but also nodded in agreement.  
  
Kanda kept still as the others left. In his peripheral, he saw Tiedoll glance his way.  
  
Anita waited until they were alone, the heavy doors shutting behind the others. Silently, she stood, approaching Kanda, the silence hanging heavily between them.  
  
Anita sighed. “Yuu…”  
  
Kanda looked up, meeting his aunt’s gaze. “What? Are you going to rag on me, too?”  
  
“ _Yuu_.” Anita frowned in disapproval. “You know that no one is attacking you – everyone is worried, and rightly so. You went out unguarded and an akuma attacked you-“  
  
“I defended myself _fine_ ,” Kanda argued. “I’m not weak and I’ve trained as an exorcist – but everyone is acting like I’m going to break if I go out and _do anything_!”  
  
Anita closed her eyes, her slim fingers massaging her forehead. “It isn’t like that, and you know it.” She looked back up, tired and worn. “You’re not just an exorcist, Yuu – you’re a prince before that and those responsibilities must be your priority. After the examination, that _will_ be how it is.”   
  
Kanda’s jaw clenched. “What, so I’m supposed to waste my time in stupid meetings and dating noblewomen? Other exorcists and CROWs are _disappearing_ and just because other royals are stepping down as exorcists doesn’t mean it’s right!”  
  
Anita exhaled, exasperation evident. “Yuu, I don’t know what else to do at this point. You have to think of how you can be helpful in other ways – that’s what’s expected. That’s what your father did.” She met Kanda’s gaze, the sternness in her expression cracking. “What would he think if he saw how you were acting now?”  
  
The words were a slap across the face. Kanda balked, completely stunned, his anger crumbling into something far more painful than what he could articulate.  
  
A tense, quiet moment passed between them before Anita spoke, her hands clasped together tightly. “I will trust that this will be the last time it happens. This type of behavior is never acceptable on any account – let alone for the future leader of this kingdom.”  
  
Kanda inwardly cringed, the words leaden as they seeped into his core. He inhaled, finally finding his ability to speak. “May I go now?”  
  
Anita nodded. “Please make sure to be on time for dinner. Legory Peck will be joining us tonight.”  
  
Kanda huffed, but didn’t say anything else as he left the throne room.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Allen was able to settle in comfortably. After arriving at the castle, he had been shown to a guest room in the wing close to where the other exorcists remained, the servants more than gracious. He was actually a little surprised by how well he was being treated; exorcists were higher-ranking soldiers, yes, but were still never revered in the same way as the nobility unless they were born into such a class.   
  
_‘Ilveria is definitely a lot different than Liorea,’_ Allen thought as he left the wing. The servants had been kind enough to offer to escort him to wherever he needed to go, but Allen hadn’t taken them up on it. He imagined they were probably busy enough as it was, and he could manage on his own.  
  
The halls were spacious and airy, large windows lining many of the walls. Allen took his time as he navigated them, his silvery eyes glancing out the window from time to time. As he looked out toward one south-facing window, he recognized what looked like a larger training arena. _‘That’s probably where the examination will take place.’_  
  
Timcanpy flew alongside Allen as they continued on. He hadn’t met many of the Ilverian exorcists yet, but knew there were only three of them – four, if the prince was included. Allen only knew of them from what he had heard from his own general – and Lavi, of course.  
  
Right – he needed to find out where Lavi was. _‘Probably wherever the library is, knowing him.’_  
  
Allen looked up as he saw a young man walking from the opposite end – probably around Allen’s age, if not a year or two older. He didn’t recognize him, as he dressed somewhat plainly and in dark clothes, a stormy look on his face.  
  
Allen blinked, just as they were about to cross paths. “Um, excuse me – but by any chance do you know where the library is-?”  
  
“Out of my way, Beansprout.”  
  
Allen’s mouth hung open, the brusque comment stunning him for a few seconds. He scowled, turning as he watched the young man stalk off without so much as a second glance. _‘So much for everyone here being really nice…’_  
  
Timcanpy’s tail twitched, the golden golem about to fly off in the stranger’s direction. Allen swiftly caught him by the tail. “Let it go, Tim.”  
  
“Al!”  
  
Tearing his attention away from where the young man had gone, Allen looked back. His irritation melted away, a smile appearing on his face as he spotted Lavi running over to him. “Hey – I was just looking for you.”  
  
Lavi grinned. “I heard you guys made it here earlier today! Would have found you sooner, but Gramps has had me busy.” His green eye flickered to behind Allen, expression turning somewhat inquisitive. “Was that Kanda just now?”  
  
Allen raised an eyebrow slightly, as he glanced back over his shoulder. “Him? He didn’t say – just told me to get out of the way.” He turned back to Lavi. “I don’t think he was in that great of a mood. Who is he?”  
  
Lavi blinked, before laughing. “Oh, right – I forgot this is your first time here. He’s Prince Yuu, but he usually goes by Kanda,” he explained.  
  
Surprise flickered in Allen’s eyes, but he vaguely remembered hearing the name – Lavi must have used it before around him at some point.  
  
“Anyways, I wouldn’t take how he acts personally. Something may have happened which is why he’s acting crabbier than normal.” Lavi’s eye lit up, as he changed the topic. “Hey, have you had a chance to look around? I really need a break from research and the old panda probably won’t be looking for me anytime soon.”  
  
Allen smiled. “Not yet, but I was hoping to find some food.” He paused, as his stomach growled, expression turning sheepish. “Hopefully soon.”  
  
Lavi chuckled. “I’ll help you out – I know where it is. It’s always packed so we can swipe some things no problem.”  
  
Silver eyes bright, Allen met Lavi’s gaze. “Coming to my rescue, I see.”  
  
The choice of wording caught Lavi off guard, the redhead momentarily stammering. “What?” He abruptly broke eye contact, his freckled face heating slightly. “I mean, I can’t let you starve. It’s just this way.”  
  
Allen laughed gently, as he started off in the direction that Lavi had pointed in. “Well, my stomach and I appreciate it.”  
  
He continued on and Lavi watched for a moment. His gaze followed Allen, but his legs didn’t take a step forward.  
  
Allen paused, when he noticed Lavi hadn’t moved. He looked back questioningly. “Are you coming?”  
  
Lavi snapped out of his trance. “Yeah, I’m coming,” he said, catching up to Allen. “Figured I’d give you a head start – you know, with me having long legs.”  
  
Allen rolled his eyes, not for a second buying the rationale. “Yeah. _Sure_.”  
  
Lavi cracked a smile and they continued on.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda hadn’t been able to escape the castle quickly enough. He was a few paces short of breaking into a run, his muscles twitching to get outside as swiftly as possible. After the exchange in the throne room, Kanda couldn’t take being inside – he couldn’t take being stuck inside those walls with everyone watching him, where the air was so stifling it felt as though he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t _take it_.  
  
He stopped as he ended up outside the northwest portico, stopping just beside one of the marble columns. He glanced around swiftly, making sure there were no guards or servants in sight; a few maidservants were nearby around the corner, looking as though they had brought some ashes from the fireplaces to throw out, but they hadn’t taken notice of Kanda.  
  
Not taking any chances, Kanda stepped down from the porch, its open-air design still too stifling for his liking.   
  
He ended up near the stables again, though he was tempted to avoid them. Kanda didn’t want to run into any of the stable hands, let alone the one he had met earlier, but he needed to go somewhere that no one would search for him right away – and frankly, the stables were probably the last spot anyone would look.  
  
Carefully, Kanda navigated in-between the wooden structures. He caught sight of a few stable hands not far off and the horse master, Jirou – a tall man with light hair and tanned skin – but they were at one of the stables farther away. Without thinking, Kanda turned behind the one he was closest to and ducked out of sight.  
  
Kanda leaned back against the wall, the wood rough against his back. He didn’t care as he slunk down, his arm resting on one of his knees as he sat. He tilted his head back, exhaling heavily as he closed his eyes. _‘One…two…’_  
  
He counted breaths – something he always did when he was struggling to calm down. In, out. One, two. Kanda silently counted, tension stubbornly clinging to every muscle in his body despite his best efforts. He just couldn’t focus, and he couldn’t stop thinking…  
  
He couldn’t do it.  
  
His hand balled into a fist. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t do anything. It wasn’t even just exorcism – he couldn’t _lead_. He couldn’t live up to every single expectation that had been set for him from the time he had been born. He couldn’t take on governing a whole kingdom in two years, acting like some perfectly schooled diplomat when he had no idea what he was even doing. He couldn’t navigate that and he couldn’t protect _anyone_.  
  
Another breath and Kanda tried counting – he _tried_.   
  
Maybe everything had finally gotten to him. Kanda had been under enough pressure with the exorcist examination, as much as he hated to admit it. There was that and the constant scrutiny of the court, the overwhelming responsibilities that needed to be attended to. There were the attacks that had started up and the decision that Kanda wouldn’t be needed as an exorcist.  
  
Before he could stop himself, Kanda thought back to how disappointed everyone had been in the throne room. Anita. Tiedoll…  
  
Shoulders slumped, Kanda’s other hand ran across the ground. The grass was soft and he clutched it, the texture anchoring him into the present moment.  
  
The sound of something moving caught Kanda’s attention. Suddenly alert, his eyes shot open as he lifted his face, muscles still tense and rigid. His fist had been balled so tightly that the knuckles were white, but he didn’t think to loosen it, instead looking in the direction of the sound.  
  
A stable boy had walked around the corner – specifically, the one that Kanda had run into earlier that day. He recognized him immediately, from the disheveled hair to the peculiar scar that stretched across the bridge of his nose. The stable boy froze, having locked eyes with Kanda immediately, expression somewhat startled.  
  
Silently, Kanda cursed his luck. He should have avoided the stables after all.  
  
The stable boy opened his mouth, though he shut it after a few seconds. He then tried again, but continued to flounder with what to say.  
  
Kanda quickly grew impatient. “What the hell is it?” he finally snapped. “If you want to say something, just say it. You look like a fish.”  
  
Mouth clamping shut, the stable boy’s face turned bright red. He shifted, rubbing his wrist somewhat anxiously as he finally broke eye contact. “Sorry – I just wasn’t expecting to see you here…or run into you again, really.” A bit tentatively, he looked back at Kanda. “Um…are you okay?”  
  
The question caught Kanda off guard, the hardness in his eyes fracturing. But just as quickly as the fracture occurred, he raised his guard back up, exterior turning to ice as he looked away. “Tch. What sort of question is that?”  
  
The stable boy wavered. A small, pout-like frown tugged at his lips. “It’s a question any _decent_ person would ask,” he pointed out, response a bit sharper than before. “And you don’t have to be so rude about it.”  
  
Kanda huffed, not caring to respond.   
  
A pause stretched between them and Kanda heard the stable boy walk off. Shoulders relaxing, he dared to release a breath.  
  
Not five minutes had passed before the stable boy returned.   
  
Kanda fought a groan, ready to lash out at him. Couldn’t he understand that Kanda didn’t _want_ to talk? There wasn’t even any reason for them to converse. Turning his face, Kanda was ready to lay it out right then and there-  
  
He stilled.  
  
The stable boy had come back with some folded fabric in his hand. Kanda stared in confusion, not at first understanding what he had even brought. However, he recognized what it was the stable boy had brought – his jacket.  
  
“Here,” the stable boy said as he offered the jacket to Kanda. “You left it earlier, so I put it up to dry until I could figure out who to give it to.”  
  
Kanda stared. He hadn’t even thought about his jacket, and probably would have gone the whole day without ever having missed it.   
  
Standing up, Kanda took it. “You didn’t have to waste your time. It’s just a jacket.”  
  
The stable boy blinked as he frowned in confusion. “But...it was a really nice one,” he pointed out. “I didn’t think you’d want anything to happen to it.”  
  
Kanda snorted. He didn’t understand why the stable boy was so concerned over a piece of clothing – it wasn’t like Kanda didn’t have others.   
  
Before either of them could say anything else, voices drew near toward the front of the stables they were hiding behind. Kanda turned, tension returning to his body. He recognizes a few voices – the horse master, Jirou, and a few advisors from the court.   
  
Kanda cursed under his breath and the stable boy looked at him curiously. He wasn’t sure what some of the advisors were doing at the stables, but he didn’t want to run into any of them.   
  
Quietly, he kept against the wall behind the stable. As long as the stable boy kept his mouth shut…  
  
The stable boy took a step back, but lost his footing as he stepped into a hole. He staggered, yelping as he fell forward-  
  
Reflexes kicking in, Kanda caught him. He glared. “ _Watch it_ ,” he hissed, teeth clenched.  
  
“Is someone back there?”  
  
Both Kanda and the stable boy tensed, Jirou’s voice cutting through the air.   
  
The stable boy moved, his bright blue eyes briefly meeting Kanda’s. He broke from the prince’s grasp abruptly, heading back around to the front of the stables.  
  
Kanda inwardly cursed. Great – the stable boy would probably rat him out.  
  
“Oh, it’s just you, Alma,” Jirou said. “Thought I heard voices back there?”  
  
“No, it was just me.”  
  
Kanda blinked, perplexed as he listened to the conversation. Did the stable boy – ‘ _Alma_ ,’ he thought – just lie for him?  
  
“Well, get back to your stable and keep an eye on your master’s horses,” Jirou instructed. “They look like they need to be cleaned.”  
  
“Oh – right.”  
  
The conversation died after that and Kanda assumed that Alma must have left. He waited, listening until the horse master set up the advisors with a few horses to ride out into the city. Kanda didn’t bother to pay attention to the details of the conversation, instead listening until they rode off, Jirou guiding them to the gatehouse.  
  
Once they were gone, Kanda went back around to the front of the stables. He glanced around the area, at first not seeing anyone – not even the stable boy. A figure moved in his peripheral and he turned sharply. When he did, he saw Alma leading a horse out from one of the stables.  
  
Kanda approached him. Alma had situated the horse outside in a more open area, having grabbed a bucket and sponge. He hadn’t yet noticed Kanda as he filled the bucket with water from a nearby pump.  
  
“Hey,” Kanda spoke, causing the stable boy to look up. “Why did you say that back there?”  
  
Alma blinked, his expression growing more flummoxed by the second. “What?”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. “Back there – when you said there was no one else behind the stables.”  
  
Alma blanched a bit as he floundered with his response. “Um, sorry, I probably shouldn’t have lied like that. But it was just…” He trailed off as he ran a hand through his dark hair.  
  
“But _what_?” Kanda pressed, crossing his arms.  
  
Alma winced at the tone. He met Kanda’s gaze somewhat abashedly before he again broke eye contact. “You seemed kind of upset, like you didn’t want to talk to anyone. I thought maybe you were avoiding those people. Besides, it’s not really my business what you were doing back there.”  
  
The words were spoken cautiously, and once again, Kanda was at a loss for how to respond. The logic had been surprisingly thoughtful and Kanda felt a dull pinch of guilt for having acted so harshly toward the stable boy earlier. A bit uncomfortably, he shifted as he averted his gaze. “Tch. You don’t have to lie for me. That’s not your responsibility.”  
  
Alma looked back at Kanda, his gaze a little uncertain as an awkward pause stretched between them. Rubbing the back of his neck, he glanced at the horse. “Ah, well I should probably let you get back to hiding,” he said, before offering a hesitant smile. “Unless you want to watch this horse get a bath. It’s not the most interesting thing, but I’d be careful not to spill water on you again.”  
  
There was a tiny nudge of humor to his words, but not enough to amuse Kanda. He rolled his eyes. “You’ll probably spill water, anyways…” he grumbled under his breath.  
  
Alma paused, and for a second, Kanda thought maybe he’d argue against the insult. But to his surprise, the stable boy laughed gently. “Yeah, I probably would. I don’t have the best coordination,” he admitted. “So, you should probably get back while I work.”  
  
He didn’t wait for Kanda to respond. Alma grabbed the bucket, bringing it over to where the horse remained. The beast was calm as Alma mixed some soap into the water, dipping a sponge in as he soaked it into some suds.   
  
Kanda wavered. He realized he could have just left – as Alma had pointed out, it wasn’t like a horse bath was that interesting to watch. But when Kanda thought about leaving and about going back to the castle, his mind threatened to shut down, thoughts drawing to a close.  
  
Impulse kicking in, Kanda walked over to a nearby stable and leaned against the wooden wall. As an afterthought, he threw the hood of his cloak up, just so he wouldn’t be recognized as easily.  
  
As Alma began to run the sponge over the horse’s coat, he glanced back. He stifled a small laugh. “Why do you have your hood up? It’s nice outside.”  
  
“Because I feel like it.”  
  
Alma shrugged it off. “If you say so,” he said. A thought dawned on him as he looked back once more. “Oh! I never told you my name – it’s Alma.”  
  
Kanda looked off to the side. “I heard the horse master call you it.”  
  
Alma blushed and he looked away. “Oh – I didn’t realize.” A bit more hesitantly, he spoke again. “What’s your name?”  
  
The question hit Kanda unexpectedly, his expression bewildered. Slowly, realization dawned on him. _‘He...doesn’t know.’_  
  
The air fell quiet and Kanda looked back at Alma. They immediately locked gazes and Kanda realized that Alma had been staring.  
  
Alma flushed. “Ah, sorry. It’s just you didn’t answer-“  
  
“It’s fine.” Kanda’s answer was stiff as he shook his head. “I go by Kanda.”  
  
The response visibly calmed Alma, who smiled warmly. “Kanda,” he repeated before he went back to washing the horse. He chattered on, tone conversational. “Are you one of the soldiers here?”  
  
Again, Kanda hesitated to answer, his response worded carefully. “No,” he said, before taking in a breath. “I’m an exorcist-“  
  
“Really?” Alma turned back around, eyes wide. “Is that why you rode out earlier? Was it for an assignment? That must be so exciting! But, also dangerous? I don’t know if you’ve met Allen yet, but he’s the exorcist who came with us from Liorea, and it just seems so intense with all you guys have to do!”  
  
As Alma went on, Kanda struggled to keep up with the speed at which he spoke. “Calm down – it’s not always that exciting,” he mumbled.   
  
“But _still_.” Alma paused to rinse the sponge, smiling at Kanda. “It’s really brave what you do as an exorcist. I don’t think I’d ever be able to do something like that.”  
  
Kanda inwardly flinched at the praise. Brave. Alma was calling him brave, but Kanda knew better. He wouldn’t be an active exorcist much longer and would be back on the sidelines after the examination was done with. And then what? Kanda would just be…  
  
Abruptly, he thought back to earlier that day – to venturing out, and facing that akuma on his own. To someone like Alma, it may have seemed brave. But to everyone else…  
  
Reckless. Foolish. Kanda had disappointed _everyone_.  
  
When Kanda said nothing, Alma glanced back. He paused, taking note immediately of Kanda’s stormy expression. Concern tinged his eyes, as he placed the sponge down. “Is something wrong?”  
  
Kanda’s dark blue eyes flickered. “What?” he asked, question spilling from his lips more sharply than intended.  
  
Alma blinked in surprise. “Oh, it’s just…you looked upset again,” he said, sounding a bit more unsure. “I just didn’t know if I said anything…”  
  
The implication clear, Kanda again felt a strange nudge of guilt. “It’s not you,” he expressed, the response a bit rushed. “It’s just other shit. Don’t worry about it.”  
  
Alma didn’t say anything, but slowly seemed to accept the answer. Finally, he nodded. “Okay.” He smiled gently. “As long as you’re sure.”  
  
Kanda shrugged, and kept quiet.  
  
Alma returned his attention to the horse, continuing to bathe it. His chattering slowed as he focused on the task at hand, a comfortable silence falling between them. Surprisingly, Kanda didn’t find the activity to be boring. It wasn’t engaging, exactly, but it was…oddly relaxing. He hadn’t expected a horse bath to be as calming as it was. Or the stable boy’s company, for that matter.  
  
Before Kanda knew it, Alma finished rinsing the horse off, the animal shaking its mane. Alma laughed good-naturedly at being splashed and stroked the horse gently. “Do you feel better?” he asked it. “You _were_ pretty dirty after that trip we made…”  
  
Kanda watched a moment longer before his gaze wandered. He realized that with how long he had been there, he was pushing his luck – Jirou or even the advisors could have returned at any minute. “I should go.”  
  
Alma glanced back at Kanda, a flash of disappointment appearing in his eyes. It disappeared as swiftly as it had come, though, and Alma smiled. “Right. You must be pretty busy.”   
  
A pause stretched between them and Kanda shifted. “Thanks. For the jacket,” he finally said, the words rigid and awkward.  
  
Alma’s face lit up. “Sure! I’m glad you came back to get it,” he said before continuing a bit more hesitantly. “Um…good luck with everything, if I don’t see you again. I’m only here until the duke leaves.”  
  
The words left a dull feeling in Kanda’s chest, but he nodded, ignoring the sensation.  
  
They parted ways after that. Alma led the horse back to the stables as Kanda headed for the castle.   
  
Silently, Kanda fought the urge to look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! I had meant to post this chapter sooner, but the weekend sort of got away from me. >.< I also wanted to wait until I had finished chapter 17, since I've sort of been in a heavy writing mode the last few days. (But it’s done, so I’ll be starting 18 soon - I’m trying to keep at least 10 or 11 chapters ahead so I can make sure everything plot-wise lines up smoothly.)
> 
> This chapter has probably been one of my favorite ones - a lot happens in it, and it’s kind of loaded. I think this is also one of the first chapters where Kanda’s character flowed a bit more naturally for me to write? He’s a bit of a rebel with that sneaking out stunt he pulls, but he just is not a person who likes to be caged. In a lot of ways, royalty doesn’t suit him easily. (I’m also being self-indulgent with my headcanons for this fic - Kanda always struck me as someone who would actually get really overwhelmed in stifling situations, and that’s where a lot of the aggression comes out. Hopefully it sort of still echoes his character in canon, but again, I’m taking liberties.)
> 
> Also - it was doubly fun because both featured ships meet here! Aaa! With Lavi and Allen is was much shorter, I know, though they definitely have more scenes in future chapters. They already know each other in this AU, so there’s some foundational things there, but there is a little bit of a slow burn trail with them. :3 Admittedly, I haven’t had a lot of experience with Laven so I’m hoping to do this ship justice as I flesh out their story here.
> 
> Alma and Kanda, I went back and forth on how I wanted them to meet. I definitely wanted there to be a wee bit of fiction (splashing water on Kanda seemed like a solid way to go), but at the same time, I’m going a slightly different route than what I have done in my previous fics. There’s less abrasion than what I’ve previously written and a bit more softness that’s sure to come - so hopefully that translates well, too. (Some awkward crushing may be on the way. X3)
> 
> Hoping that everyone is doing well right now, and that this story is offering a distraction. As always, any comments and kudos are deeply appreciated. <3


	7. Repercussions

Kanda knew dinner would be tense with his aunt. After being dragged back to the castle earlier that day by Tiedoll, Anita hadn’t allowed him to back out. Their conversation was still fresh in his mind, his mood soured beyond repair after the interaction. It didn’t matter if her words had come from concern – they left a mark and Kanda would have skipped dinner all together if he could.  
  
But, Legory Peck was joining them – and Kanda knew he didn’t have room to mess up a second time that day.   
  
He kept quiet, speaking only when absolutely necessary. To Kanda’s relief, the conversation at dinner was mostly between Anita and Legory, allowing Kanda to eat his food without much engagement. He was in no mood to interact with anyone, let alone some visiting diplomat. Not an hour had passed before Kanda determined he wasn’t fond of the man. Legory was condescending and pompous, even by noble standards. Every time he opened his mouth, it was like listening to nails on a chalkboard – Kanda didn’t know how his aunt had the patience to be so pleasant and engaging with the duke.  
  
Despite this, Legory was still the official overseeing the examination – and Kanda couldn’t screw _that_ up.  
  
“We can show you more of the grounds tomorrow,” Anita offered Legory, who was seated to her left. “Along with the training facilities – I know earlier you asked to see those.”  
  
“That’d be nice.” He looked across the table, his light brown eyes peering at Kanda in a somewhat scrutinizing manner. “It must be quite a lot, between training and balancing your responsibilities.”  
  
Kanda’s eyes flashed, his gaze sharp as he met Legory’s stare directly from across the table. He purposely kept his response short. “It’s fine.”  
  
“After the examination, Yuu will be taking some time to focus on other areas,” Anita spoke. Her words were even and a little cautious. “Considering some of the recent akuma activity, he will be stepping down from his exorcist duties for the time being.”  
  
Kanda’s attention darted to Anita, irritation glimmering in his eyes. However, he swallowed his words; even with how rash he could be, he forced himself to keep his mouth shut. _‘Don’t fucking say anything stupid.’_  
  
“Ah, yes – it’s unfortunate, considering we need all the exorcists we can find, but it can’t be avoided.” Legory locked his fingers. “Nobility should be the last to join the frontline. In time, we can compensate for any other defenses lost – that’s why we’re training more CROWs.”  
  
The comment was a needle dragging across Kanda’s nerves and he spoke before he could stop himself, his earlier resolve shattering. “That doesn’t mean it won’t happen. It’d be stupid not to prepare for it and CROWs can’t replace exorcists.”  
  
“Yuu.” Anita’s frown was lined with disapproval as she sent her nephew a warning glance.  
  
Legory looked back at Kanda, eyebrow rising. “I never said there was no need for preparation. Perhaps you mistook my words,” he said, tone almost dismissive.   
  
Kanda glared. “Sounds like you think everyone else is pretty expendable to me,” he clipped, the words once more flying from his lips before he could think better. He supposed not saying anything stupid was a lost cause now.  
  
The insult didn’t go unnoticed and Kanda thought he saw Legory’s eye twitch. “With all due respect, you are the only heir to the throne – it’d be quite negligent to endanger yourself for the sake of sparing a few others, wouldn’t it?”  
  
 _‘Negligent?’_ The words were spoken with a mask of politeness, causing Kanda’s muscles to twitch. He opened his mouth to argue-  
  
Anita cut him off quickly. “These decisions are never easy to make. But we always do what we can to prioritize the welfare of the kingdom.” Her eyes met Kanda’s as she continued warily. “Even if it means sacrificing what we wish for most.”  
  
Kanda shut his mouth and broke eye contact. He huffed quietly.  
  
“How many exorcists does your unit have?” Legory asked.  
  
“We have a total of three – it’s a small unit, but you’ll see they’re all very skilled. We do periodic scouts for other accommodators, but haven’t found any new ones in some time,” Anita answered. “Tomorrow I can introduce you to them all.”  
  
The conversation continued once more between Anita and Legory. Kanda’s attention slipped away slowly; he had nothing else to say and was too annoyed to attempt civility for much longer. If he was lucky, he could slip away soon – he just needed to linger long enough so his aunt wouldn’t say anything to him later on about it.  
  
Attention drifting to the windows, Kanda glanced outside. Dusk had taken hold of the sky, the colors gradually melting into dark indigo, an array of stars shining brightly.   
  
“It’s only a few weeks away,” Anita said. “The Midsummer Celebration is something we host annually –if you’d like to attend, we can extend your stay. I know Yuu is looking forward to it.”  
  
Kanda’s attention returned to the conversation as he looked at Anita irately. He hadn’t been so blind as to miss the comment – something Anita had likely made for the sake of getting him to pay attention. He hated that it had worked so well.  
  
Legory looked at Kanda, eyes dubious. “Really? And why is that?”   
  
Again, the words were like needles. Kanda spoke before he could think. “I don’t see why it’s that interesting to talk about.”  
  
He didn’t need to look to know that Anita was giving him a _look_ and she spoke, somehow as poised as ever. “We spoke earlier about some prospects for Yuu. It’ll be a good time to form some new connections with his coronation coming up.”  
  
“I see.” Legory placed his wine glass down as he smiled. “I do have a niece around your age – she always enjoys these sorts of events.”  
  
The suggestion held a blatant implication – so much that Kanda balked at the idea. He scowled, prepared to shoot down the offer-  
  
“That would be lovely. We can send her an invitation tomorrow,” Anita said.  
  
Kanda glared at his aunt. He set his fork down as he pushed his chair back to stand.   
  
Anita turned toward him. “Yuu-“  
  
“I have something to do – excuse me,” Kanda said, tone short.   
  
He didn’t give her a chance to say anything more as he left the dining room swiftly. Kanda knew it was probably rude, but he didn’t care – he was at his limit for the night and didn’t have it in him to sit there and be poked and prodded until his nerves were scraped raw. He didn’t have it in him to sit there while his life got so casually _tossed around_.  
  
 _‘Such bullshit,’_ Kanda thought, still silently seething over Legory’s suggestion. Kanda was already adverse to being forced to meet anyone, let alone someone related to _him_.   
  
He fumed, not even getting very far from the dining room before he turned a corner, passing Mahoja of all people.  
  
Mahoja raised an eyebrow as Kanda passed her. A scowl appearing on her face, she reached over, the burly woman grabbing him by the shoulder.   
  
Kanda cursed as he whipped his head back. “What the-“  
  
“Hey.” Mahoja pulled him back a bit, before she released her grip. She crossed her arms over her chest. “Where are you going? You’re supposed to be at dinner with the duke right now.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. “I left. That guy was pissing me off.”  
  
Mahoja shook her head. “Hmph. _That_ probably left a good impression. Don’t you ever think these things through?”  
  
“Yeah, well you would have done the same.”  
  
Mahoja uncrossed her arms, as her frown remained in place. “You’re always a brat, but lately you’ve been especially difficult – things aren’t really easy for anyone right now.” She sighed. “And your behavior isn’t putting your aunt in an easy position, either.”  
  
Kanda glared, immediately put off. He should have known that Mahoja would defend Anita, but it still aggravated him that she was automatically siding with his aunt. He sneered as he looked away.   
  
Mahoja observed the prince, exhaling heavily once more. “I won’t stand here and criticize you. I’m pretty sure you got enough of that today,” she said. “But you should be wary about how you act – especially with the duke. Like it or not, he’s the one overseeing the examination.”  
  
As she spoke, Kanda begrudgingly kept quiet. The words sunk in, their truth weighing on him heavily.  
  
He hated that Mahoja had a point.  
  
Mahoja turned, as she started back off in the opposite direction as Kanda. “Try not to be such a brat tomorrow. I swear your tantrums have gotten worse as you’ve gotten older.”  
  
Kanda snorted. _‘Whatever,’_ he thought as he turned to continue on his own way.  
  
Even if Mahoja had had a point, it wasn’t like she understood what he was feeling. It wasn’t like anyone did.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“So, _this_ is where you get to work.”  
  
Lavi grinned widely, as he walked over to the desk and plopped down into the chair. “Yup. This is where the magic happens.”  
  
Allen looked around, the library’s back room frankly a disaster. He glanced at a stack of books, running his finger on top – it was coated in a thick layer in dust, his skin smearing with gray. He grimaced in mild disgust. “Did anyone even clean before you got here? It looks like a storm blew through a century ago and no one bothered to deal with the aftermath.”  
  
“Come on, Al. It’s not that bad,” Lavi said as he picked up a journal. Immediately, it fell apart at the spine and his face dropped as he scrambled to keep the pages in order. “Er, I mean things are a bit old, but you know, it’s all part of history.”  
  
Allen snickered. “Sure.” He looked up as Timcanpy flew over and landed on his shoulder. “Tim and I get it, though. You always like old things.”  
  
“Listen, history and knowledge are _timeless._ The fact that no one has been in here for who knows how long just makes it more exciting for me.” Lavi’s grin broadened. “Maybe I’ll make some radical, new discovery.”  
  
Allen leaned against the desk. The lighting in the study was dim, even with several additional candles having been lit. The solitary fogged window in the room was now dark and the air remained thick with the musty scent of old leather and parchment.   
  
“Should I be worried you won’t come back to Liorea?” Allen asked, silver eyes glinting with amusement as he met Lavi’s gaze. “May be hard to leave with all these old books.”  
  
Lavi faltered, before laughing awkwardly. “You know I’ll blow through this stuff quickly. Especially with how hard Gramps is working me,” he said before a thoughtful look crossed his features. “Actually, I’m not sure where he went…maybe he’s in another part of the library.”  
  
“You guys are working pretty hard, huh?” Allen picked up one of the journals, though he made sure to be careful as he looked through it. “Wow, I don’t think I can even read this language.”  
  
“Yeah, that one is really old,” Lavi said, recognizing the text Allen had taken immediately. “We’re trying to take advantage of any resources while we’re here. We sort of went through everything in Liorea and have been trying to see if we can find something to go off of – especially with everything going on.”  
  
“Right,” Allen said as he stopped on one page. It had several illustrations consisting of strange, inhuman creatures. Monstrous forms and nightmarish faces. “Those disappearances that started in Othelion…”  
  
Lavi nodded. His expression turned serious, the warm glow of candlelight flickering against his face. “Actually, I wanted to ask how it was getting here? Did you notice anything?” He paused, his green eye warily watching Allen. “Gramps and I didn’t really have anything happen while we were traveling, but I can’t…you know. See things like you do.”  
  
Allen didn’t say anything at first. He still held the journal in his grasp, his hands gloved. However, his gaze shifted to his left hand. Tentatively, he lifted it, his fingers running over the left side of his face – strange and marred by a red scar, a pentacle visible just above his brow.  
  
Allen lowered his hand. “Nothing major happened while we traveled,” he finally answered, though his gaze remained contemplative. “But, a few hours before we arrived, one thing sort of strange happened. The horses all got scared and started acting up. I couldn’t pick up on anything – Tim didn’t see anything either.”  
  
As Allen spoke, Timcanpy fluttered off his shoulder, landing on the corner of Lavi’s desk. Lavi reached over, lightly poking the golden golem. “I’m surprised Cross let you bring him – he always has Timcanpy with him.”  
  
Allen shrugged at the mention of the Liorean exorcist general. “He told me to bring him on this trip. Not that I’m complaining,” he said as he smiled at the golem. “Tim’s always good company.”  
  
Lavi hummed. He poked at Tim again, the golden golem twitching at the touch. “So, the horses freaked out and that was it?”  
  
“Yeah.” Allen leaned against the side of the desk, gaze thoughtful. “They all were really bothered by something, but I have no idea what. Alma thought something spooked them, but even he wasn’t sure.”  
  
Lavi blinked. “Alma?” he asked, the name sounding familiar though he couldn’t think of why.  
  
“Oh – right. I don’t think you guys ever actually met in Liorea – but he works in the stables with Klaud Nine.” Allen paused, a thought occurring to him. “Actually, I should probably see how he’s doing – I forgot I had told him I’d find him later.”  
  
“Got it.” Lavi smiled reassuringly. “Well, you’ll know where to find me if you need anything. Pretty sure I’ll be up all night and Gramps will probably get here any minute.”  
  
“Don’t work too hard.” Allen smiled as Timcanpy flew back over and perched onto his shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”  
  
Lavi flashed another smile, green eye alight. “Sounds like a plan.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The servants’ quarters were large, covering a wide range of rooms in the lower level of the castle’s west wing. All of the Ilverian servants had their own living spaces, with most being shared between two people. There was also a common area and a smaller dining hall where the servants could have their meals, completely separated from the royal family and the advisors.  
  
Alma looked around. Because he had situated horses into their new environment and cleaned them all so quickly, he hadn’t had a chance to even learn where he would be sleeping. He had been fortunate enough to come across a kind maidservant who had taken the time to show Alma where everything was, including where to find a warm meal and a place to sleep.  
  
“The steward had mentioned having some extra rooms set up since we weren’t sure how many attendants would be arriving with the duke, but your room is here,” the maidservant said as she showed Alma into a room. “It’s near the exit, which should make working in the stables easier in case you need to get there quickly.”  
  
Alma glanced around. The room was small, but still bigger than his own room back in Liorea where his space was akin to a modest closet. This one was definitely nicer, with a simple cot and a window. A lantern sat on the small bedside table, casting a warm glow onto everything.  
  
Beaming, Alma looked back at the maidservant. “This is perfect – thank you.”  
  
The maidservant smiled politely and left after that.  
  
Once alone, Alma placed his bag on the ground. It was small and had been easily tossed into the corner of one of the stables while working, with nothing more but a few changes of clothes inside. He didn’t own much of anything to begin with, so packing had been a minimal affair.  
  
 _‘I’m so tired,’_ he thought as he fell back onto the cot. He hadn’t slept on anything even remotely similar to a mattress since he had left Liorea, and although Alma was used to sleeping on hard surfaces, the bed was a welcome change.  
  
Someone knocked at the door and Alma sat up quickly. “Yeah?”  
  
Allen poked his head in, Timcanpy flying just ahead of him. “I caught one of the maidservants – she let me know where to find you,” he said, before stepping inside. His expression turned apologetic. “I’m sorry I didn’t find you sooner. The day got away from me.”  
  
Alma’s eyes brightened as Timcanpy nestled onto his shoulder. He tapped the golem playfully. “That’s okay. I ended up being sort of busy with the horses.”  
  
“I can imagine. You’re just now getting settled in?” Allen asked as he noticed how haphazardly Alma’s bag had been thrown.  
  
Alma rubbed the back of his head. “Ah, yeah. The horses needed to get situated and they were all pretty dirty after traveling.” Looking up at Allen, his gaze turned inquisitive. “Did you get to look around at all? This place is so big, but I’m hoping that maybe tomorrow I can get a chance to walk around a bit.”  
  
“A little, but it wasn’t much. I ran into Lavi, so most of what I saw was the library – and the kitchen.” Allen paused, as he recalled the earlier events that day. “I haven’t met the other exorcists yet, so I think I’ll do that tomorrow.”  
  
As Allen said this, Alma’s thoughts immediately shifted to the exorcist he had met earlier – Kanda. His chest tightened at the memory, the cause unknown. Shifting a bit, he looked off to the side.   
  
“Oh – I did have a run in with the prince, though,” Allen added before his expression turned somewhat contemplative. “Still not sure what to make of him.”  
  
Alma blinked, curiosity lit anew. “What do you mean?”  
  
Allen shook his head and smiled. “It’s probably nothing. He seemed a little rough, but Lavi mentioned he was probably in a bad mood. We’ll see how it goes the next time.”  
  
Alma’s gaze was reassuring. “I’m sure that’s what it is! Wow, that’s so exciting you got to meet him.”  
  
“I’m sure you’ll see him at some point,” Allen said. He leaned back against the doorframe, tone turning chary. “You know, you’d be able to see a lot at the examination. If you wanted to go.”  
  
As soon as the topic was breached, Alma looked down. Timcanpy’s wing brushed across his face gently, but he ignored it. “I don’t know. I’m not really supposed to be at those things.”  
  
Allen’s expression softened, gaze sympathetic. “I don’t think Ilveria is as strict as Liorea. I heard the examination here is open to the public – so it’s not just reserved for the nobility like it is in Liorea.”   
  
Alma didn’t say anything. He knew that Allen was only trying to be supportive and encourage him to do what he wanted, but at the same time he was resistant to the idea. Liorea was always strict in terms of classes and how they interacted, and the thought of breaking that mold left Alma uneasy.   
  
“That’s true, I guess,” Alma spoke. A sighed escaped him. “I just don’t want Duke Legory to say anything...”  
  
Allen frowned. He walked over to where Alma was on the cot and quietly took a seat next to him.   
  
“Hey,” he started, words soft. “I wanted to ask…he hasn’t been making things hard for you, has he?”  
  
Alma looked up, somewhat caught off guard by the question. “What? No.” He shook his head, though his eyes held a glimmer of uncertainty as he broke eye contact again. “I mean...he doesn’t treat me any differently than he would anyone else who…you know.”  
  
Alma didn’t elaborate further, but Allen didn’t need to hear any more to understand. The air around them remained heavy and Allen’s voice spilled out gently. “You still shouldn’t have to deal with Legory or anyone like him treating you that way. You didn’t have any control over what happened and it wasn’t your fault.”  
  
The words were gentle, though Alma’s chest pinched as he heard them. He still avoided looking Allen in the eye, the air having become thick and stifling.  
  
Alma swallowed. “It’s fine.” He looked back at Allen and smiled reassuringly. “Really – it’s not that bad. I’m really lucky to have my job and at least I got to travel out here.”  
  
Allen paused as he eyed Alma carefully. A hint of concern lingered in his gaze, though he eventually smiled, not wanting to push the topic. “I should let you get some sleep. I’m sure you’re probably as tired as I am.”  
  
“Where are you staying tonight? Are you close to here?” Alma asked.  
  
Allen stood. “I was placed in the wing near the other exorcists. But I’ll be coming to this wing for meals. I’ll see you tomorrow, though.”  
  
“Okay.” Alma smiled, as he tapped Timcanpy one final time before the golem flew back over to Allen. “Night.”  
  
Allen and Timcanpy left after that, shutting the door behind them.  
  
The room fell silent. Alma remained seated on the cot as he glanced over at the lantern on the table. The flame flickered inside, its glow warm and comforting…  
  
 _…Comforting. The lantern was always comforting and his mother always kept it on for him at night. It helped him sleep, illuminating his room so the shadows weren’t as terrifying and the darkness not as scary.  
  
He couldn’t sleep that night.  
  
Alma rolled over, the ten-year-old nestled into his cot and wrapped in thin, linen blankets. His gaze wandered over across the room, the bedroom door cracked.  
  
Sitting up, Alma looked around. His room was tiny and he climbed out of the cot, the floorboards old and shrill under the weight of his steps. Tentatively, he pulled back the door, the old metal hinges creaking loudly. Alma grimaced; he knew he was supposed to be in bed, but he couldn’t sleep.  
  
The hallway was narrow and led to only two other rooms: his mother’s room, and a small space by the door where they did all of their cooking, laundry, bathing, and other daily chores. Alma didn’t bother to venture into there and instead peeked inside his mother’s room. Sometimes she was awake, and she always made Alma feel better. “Mom?”  
  
When he looked, the room was empty.  
  
_As quickly as it had come, the memory left, Alma pushed it out quickly, not daring to give it a second more. Instead, he focused on getting ready for bed, changing into some nightclothes before he crawled into the cot. Before going to sleep, his attention flickered to the lantern.  
  
Reaching over, he snuffed the light out, the room falling into darkness.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The training room was busy the next morning. Guards practiced with different techniques and weapons in one area, while the exorcists practiced in another. It was a little annoying for Kanda; he usually preferred training with the other exorcists when the guards weren’t around, for the sake of having a larger space to work in. However, the examination was drawing near, and Kanda needed to work out any kinks he could in terms of technique.  
  
Besides – he had a bone to pick with Daisya.  
  
Daisya kicked Charity Bell, the blast momentarily blocking Kanda’s attack. “Why are you taking it out on me? Heck, I didn’t know you’d actually do it!” he pointed out, before dodging another attack. “And it’s not like you listen to me any other day!”  
  
Kanda sneered. “Yeah, and _this_ is why.”  
  
Daisya snickered. “Because you got busted? That’s on you – not me.” He paused, kicking up Charity Bell as he held it against his hip. “Anyways, it’s one thing to sneak out to look around. But dealing with an akuma was inevitably going to draw _some_ attention. Especially with Tiedoll and Marie being on the lookout.”  
  
Kanda stopped, Mugen still in his grasp. They had only been training for an hour, but he had already broken a sweat with how hard he had been going. He irritably brushed his bangs aside, a few long strands of hair falling from his ponytail. “It’s not like I was looking to find one. Anyways, it wasn’t that strong – it died quickly enough. Everyone’s fucking freaking out over it.”  
  
Daisya shrugged. “You can’t really blame them. It’s annoying, but it’s not like they can pick a new heir if anything happens to you.” He looked at Kanda inquisitively. “Have you talked to Tiedoll at all? I didn’t see him around yesterday after what happened – or all morning. Marie mentioned he may be meeting with your aunt and that duke.”  
  
At the mention of the general, Kanda stiffened. He looked away, a tinge of guilt pinching inside his chest. “No. I haven’t talked to him.”  
  
Daisya eyed Kanda and shrugged. He dropped Charity Bell and immediately kicked the ball around as though it were a toy. “Maybe you should. You’d probably feel better if you did.”  
  
Kanda turned back to Daisya sharply. However, he didn’t say anything and only huffed.  
  
Daisya caught his weapon and changed the topic. “Want to do hand-to-hand combat next? It’s been a while and I’m getting rusty.”  
  
Kanda nodded, not minding the change in topic. “Sure.”  
  
They left the arena, taking a break while they set aside their anti-akuma weapons. Kanda took a second to retie his hair, the loose strands agitating him. _‘So annoying,’_ he thought, before he glanced over at Daisya. “You ready?”  
  
Daisya nodded, but stopped just as his attention landed on the doors behind Kanda. He grinned. “Hey!”  
  
Kanda turned. He at first expected it to be Marie, but saw that Lavi had just walked inside with some young guy in tow. He had white hair and light eyes, and for a second, Kanda couldn’t think of where he had seen him before-  
  
He saw the strange scar on his face and remembered: the beansprout he had crossed paths with in the corridor the day before.  
  
Lavi looked over and grinned, his green eye holding a brighter spark than normal. “Hey,” he greeted before walking over with the beansprout. As they approached, Kanda noticed something golden on the beansprout’s shoulder – a winged golem.  
  
“I was hoping to run into you guys,” Lavi said. He nodded over to the beansprout. “I’m showing Allen around – he’s the exorcist who came with Legory from Liorea. Allen, this is Daisya, and I think you already met Kanda – or should I say, _Prince_ Yuu.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes, annoyed at the mention of his formal name. “Didn’t realize the beansprout was an exorcist.”  
  
Allen’s eyebrow twitched, but he smiled politely. “Nice to meet you, too.”  
  
“Come on, Kanda. Be nice for once.” Lavi clicked his tongue teasingly. “If you say the wrong thing to the wrong person, you’ll start a war one day.”  
  
Kanda snorted, not caring about what Lavi had to say.  
  
The golem flapped its wings and Allen looked over. “Oh – this is Timcanpy.”  
  
“A golem? Don’t see those too often,” Daisya commented. He looked at Timcanpy, intrigued. “I was always told they’re…kind of hard to create.”  
  
“He technically belongs to my general,” Allen explained. “He made him years ago, but Tim works with us in our unit.”  
  
“Got it.” Daisya’s grin widened. “So, you’re an exorcist? You should train with us – I always like a challenge.”  
  
“Be careful. Allen’s a lot tougher than he looks, so you may get your butt kicked,” Lavi said as he put an arm around Allen’s shoulder playfully.   
  
Kanda scoffed under his breath. “I doubt that.”  
  
Allen chuckled. “Lavi may be setting your expectations a bit high. But I wouldn’t mind being able to train while I’m here.”  
  
Daisya nodded. “Well, Kanda and I were going to do some hand-to-hand combat. If you want, we could do a three-way practice. Unless Lavi wants to join – it’ll be two on two.”  
  
“Me? Eh, maybe later. I’m still sort of waking up from my all-nighter.” Lavi smiled. “I can just watch for now.”  
  
Allen turned to Lavi, a hint of a smile on his lips. “You should train with us at some point – it’s been a while, even since we were in Liorea.”   
  
“Tch.” Kanda grabbed Mugen. “If you guys want to train, just do it. I’m going to go for a walk.”  
  
“What?” Daisya threw his hand up in confusion. “What about our practice?”  
  
“We can do it another time. There’s too many fucking people in here as it is,” Kanda grumbled.   
  
Daisya shrugged. “If you’re sure,” he said, before looking at Allen. “What do you say? Want to keep me busy?”  
  
Allen laughed gently. “Sure. Let me just hang my jacket up.”  
  
As Allen went to one of the benches, Kanda grabbed his sheath for Mugen. He put the sword up, attaching it to his belt. Although he could have stayed to train, the amount of people was beginning to overwhelm him. Between the guards training and now the beansprout joining them, Kanda needed to step out.  
  
“Oh, did you find your friend last night?” Lavi asked, speaking to Allen just a few feet away. “Alma, right?”  
  
Allen smiled. “Yeah! I found him last night and saw him early this morning. He was working in the stables again, but I think he was going to look around outside.”   
  
Kanda’s ears perked, the name _Alma_ striking a chord. His gaze flickered to Lavi and Allen, though they were engrossed in their own conversation, while Daisya had gone back into the arena with his anti-akuma weapon.  
  
 _‘Alma._ ’ Kanda recalled the stable boy abruptly, but shook his head at the memory, leaving the training room before anyone could say anything more to him.  
  
  


* * *

The castle grounds were nothing short of beautiful. Alma didn’t need to explore them to know that. The castle was a work of art, the few glimpses of the gardens more than enough to deepen his desire to explore. Rising extra early that morning, he made sure the horses were fed and attended to, finishing his chores before slipping away from the stables.   
  
It had been more than worth it.  
  
He looked around outside, not bold enough to explore inside the castle. Despite Allen’s previous encouragement, he didn’t want to push his luck by blindly wandering inside the castle walls, at least by himself. He hated to imagine what faux pas he could make if he crossed paths with one of the advisors, or even someone from the royal family.  
  
Alma shuddered to think about how the duke would react if that ever happened.  
  
Outside was safer to navigate and there was no shortage of sights. The gardens were plentiful; every corner was perfectly manicured and the epitome of beauty. An array of flowers flourished, some that Alma had never even seen before. Roses, daffodils, peonies – he knew he wouldn’t have time to look at everything in a single day.  
  
 _‘Maybe I can walk around a bit each day we’re here,’_ he thought. The examination wasn’t for a few more days and they would leave the day after. During that time, Alma imagined he’d be able to periodically look around a bit more.  
  
Eventually, Alma wandered to the eastern half of the grounds. He knew he needed to turn back soon. Even without factoring in how nervous he was about exploring on his own, he would need to return the stables before his absence was noticed.   
  
_‘I can go back after looking around here.’_ Alma glanced around as he entered another garden, this one vast and open. Cherry blossom trees grew near the castle walls, with a few bushes of rose buds and flower beds stretched across the lush, green grass. A path cut through the garden, leading to a bridge that stretched over an open pond.   
  
Eyes brightening, Alma ran to the bridge. It was wooden, but built finely; the railing was designed to look like plant vines, the sides of the bridge crafted of thin, narrowly carved iron. Glancing over the edge, he saw pink blossoms, the buds closed up as they swayed gently in the water. Beneath them, several white and orange fish swam – large, elegant koi fish.  
  
Alma watched, completely mesmerized. He had seen illustrations of koi fish once before, but never in person. “Wow, they’re so much bigger than I thought they’d be…”  
  
He stood on the bridge for a bit, quietly watching as the fish swam below. The cloudless sky gave way for the sun to gently beat down on his back and shoulders, warm and soothing. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d felt so _relaxed_.  
  
A part of Alma dreaded going back to Liorea.  
  
As soon as the thought tainted his mind, he shook his head. _‘Don’t think like that,’_ he told himself. _‘It’s not that bad…you’re lucky to have the job you do.’_  
  
The thoughts were forced and Alma sighed. Despite the initial comfort of the gardens, a heaviness still pressed upon his shoulders. _‘It’s not…that bad…’_  
  
He gripped at the railing, knuckles turning white. Silently, Alma repeated his thoughts as he tried to rationalize his feelings. He was just tired, maybe a little stressed. But he was _fine_.  
  
He leaned over, again focusing on the koi fish. He wanted to watch them and look at the flowers. He pushed himself up onto the railing leaning further to get a better glance-  
  
Alma teetered forward a bit too far. He lost his balance, his hands scrambling for the railing as he toppled forward. “Crap-!”  
  
Someone ran up behind Alma, grabbing his shirt and yanking him back before he had a chance to plummet face first into the pond. He gasped, staggering back as he almost lost his balance again. A hand steadied him, holding him firmly by the shoulders.  
  
Alma looked back and was startled by who he saw. “K-Kanda?”   
  
Kanda didn’t say anything at first, their eyes meeting. His lips parted, but he stiffened as he quickly released Alma from his grip. “Fucking be careful. You almost fell.”  
  
Abashed, Alma flushed. He rubbed the back of his head as he looked off to the side. “Sorry – I wasn’t paying attention,” he said, glancing back at Kanda. “I didn’t think I’d see you out here.”  
  
Kanda broke eye contact and shrugged. “I come out here sometimes,” he mumbled. “I thought you’d be in the stables or something.”  
  
Alma smiled. “I was, but I finished my chores earlier so I could look around.” He turned back, attention returning to the pond. “I’ve never seen koi fish, so I got excited when I realized there were some out here. And there are those flowers – what kind are they? They look like water lilies, but seem a little different.”  
  
Kanda looked back toward the pond, frowning slightly. “They’re just lotus flowers.”  
  
“Oh! I’ve heard of those – there aren’t any in Liorea, but aren’t they the royal flower here? Do you know when they’ll bloom?” Alma asked, curiosity piqued. “I’d love to see what they look like, but I don’t know if they’ll blossom before I have to leave.”  
  
Kanda paused. His frown remained. “I don’t know. Usually around this time, but it depends.”  
  
Alma nodded. “Right,” he said as he leaned back against the railing.   
  
Neither of them said anything, an awkward silence falling between them. Somewhat shyly, Alma gently kicked at the bridge. He didn’t know why, but he felt…nervous? Alma usually didn’t have difficulty chattering, but his ability to speak had dissipated. He had only spoken to Kanda the day before though and _that_ had been fine…  
  
Kanda shifted, keeping his gaze averted. “Um. I should leave,” he finally said. “Just don’t lean over so far again.”  
  
Alma looked up. “That’s okay,” he said, the words tumbling out quickly. “I mean – you can stay if you want. I wouldn’t mind the company.”  
  
The words were almost a little desperate and Alma wanted to cringe with how he sounded. He worried that Kanda may have noticed too, but if the exorcist did, he made no signs of it.  
  
Kanda crossed his arms as he shrugged again.  
  
When Kanda didn’t leave, Alma took the shrug as a yes. He smiled, comfort gradually returning. “So, do you come out here when you’re not training? You must be so busy, but I bet it’s nice to escape to somewhere like this.”  
  
Kanda frowned again. He glanced at the water, gaze landing on several fish as they wove in-between the lotus reeds. “It’s not really an escape. Not like coming out here makes anything go away.”  
  
Alma blinked. He hadn’t expected such a response and wasn’t sure how to answer. Taking his wrist, he rubbed it. “Well, no…but it’s still a nice place to come to.” He turned back to Kanda. “Liorea doesn’t have as many gardens and the ones that it does have are nowhere near as nice. Don’t tell anyone I said that, though.”  
  
His lips quirked into a small smile as he continued. “It probably sounds weird. I haven’t even been here two days, but I’ll be a little sad to leave. I wish I had more time to just look at everything.”  
  
Kanda kept quiet as he watched Alma. He hadn’t missed the wistfulness in the stable boy’s voice or the way his gaze wandered back to the pond. Admittedly, Kanda didn’t understand it. He didn’t understand what Alma saw in Ilveria, or why he would be sad about having to leave.  
  
Despite this, something nudged Kanda’s heart. Stubbornly, he avoided looking at Alma.  
  
“Just look around why you can,” he pointed out. “It’s not like you’re missing anything special, though. This place isn’t perfect.”  
  
Alma blinked. He turned back to Kanda, somewhat confused. “You don’t like it here?”  
  
The question took Kanda by surprise, his expression faltering as he uncrossed his arms; he wasn’t certain how to answer, which he found frustrating. It was just a simple question.  
  
But, how _did_ Kanda feel about his home?   
  
Kanda shook his head. This was stupid – he was taking way too much time to answer and he forced himself to respond. “I just think you’re hyping it up to be more than what it is.”  
  
Alma paused. He looked back at Kanda in uncertainty and opened his mouth to respond.  
  
He cut off. In the distance, Alma saw a group of people walking around the south corner of the castle. It was a decent sized group; a beautiful woman dressed regally was among several guards and with her…  
  
Alma recognized Legory immediately and his heart dropped into his stomach.  
  
Quickly, Alma moved to get off the bridge. “I should go.”   
  
Kanda scowled, perplexed by Alma’s abrupt change in demeanor. “I thought you wanted to look around.”  
  
Alma wavered. He glanced back toward the group, though they were still a safe distance away. However, Alma’s panic grew – he didn’t want to run into Legory while out in the gardens. “I just don’t want-“  
  
As Alma looked, Kanda’s attention also landed on the group. He cursed under his breath.  
  
Alma glanced back, confused by Kanda’s reaction. Before he could ask, Kanda spoke.  
  
“This way.” Kanda nodded toward the castle, before hurrying off the bridge.  
  
Alma didn’t say anything as he followed Kanda. He glanced back toward the group; they had stopped, the woman looking as though she were saying something to Legory. The duke glanced around, his gaze wandering near where Alma was-  
  
Alma felt Kanda grab his wrist, tugging him along.  
  
They ducked behind several cherry blossom trees, moving out of sight. At first, Alma thought that maybe they would stop there; the trees and shade would hopefully be enough that they wouldn’t draw any attention. Kanda continued, though, and led him to a door – one that was practically concealed. It was covered in ivy and Alma wouldn’t have realized it was there had Kanda not brought him to it.  
  
Turning back, Kanda realized he was still holding Alma’s wrist. He let go abruptly as he opened the door, entering inside.  
  
Alma followed. “Where does this go?  
  
Kanda allowed the door to shut behind them, the sound heavy. “It just leads in and out of the castle. Servants use it.”  
  
“Oh.” Alma looked around. They had entered a smaller hall that led up a narrow stairwell. It smelled musty, a torch lit on one of the walls to illuminate the space. In a way, it made Alma feel at ease; it wasn’t likely anyone else would come across them, unless they were a servant as Kanda had said.  
  
Alma turned back to Kanda, gaze inquisitive. “Why did you bring me here?” he asked, though Kanda frowned immediately at the inquiry. “I mean, you could have just told me where to go…were you avoiding someone in that group too?”  
  
Kanda turned a bit rigid. “I didn’t feel like talking with anyone. Besides, it’s not like this door is that easy to find. You’d just have gotten lost.”  
  
Alma flushed in the darkness. “I wouldn’t have gotten lost,” he murmured, a small frown tugging at his lips. He blinked, looking at Kanda through the darkness. “Who was that woman with Duke Legory? She was so beautiful.”  
  
Kanda wavered. “That was Anita,” he mumbled. He paused, before adding a bit quickly, “She’s the queen regent.”  
  
“Really?” Alma’s eyes widened and he glanced back at the door. A small part of him was tempted to peek back outside. He hadn’t anticipated seeing the queen regent and he doubted he would have another chance during his stay. However, he knew better and kept the door shut. “I guess she’s showing the duke around.”  
  
Kanda watched Alma. “So, you’re avoiding him?” he asked.  
  
Alma’s head whipped back, a bit confused “What?”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. “The duke. You seemed pretty freaked out on the bridge.”  
  
“Um.” Alma leaned back against the wall as he averted his gaze. “He wouldn’t like me wandering around – I’m not supposed to be anywhere else aside from the stables. Or the servants’ quarters.”  
  
Kanda frowned. “That’s stupid. Your job can’t keep you that fucking busy,” he commented as he crossed his arms. “It’s not like you’re not allowed to look around.”  
  
Alma looked up at Kanda and smiled weakly. “That’s what Allen said earlier,” he spoke. “It’s just things in Liorea are stricter and I really don’t want to make anyone angry while I’m here.”  
  
A small scoff escaped Kanda. “Don’t worry about that. It’s not his castle and it’s not like Anita would care.”  
  
Alma blinked, somewhat flummoxed. “Why do you keep calling her that?”  
  
Kanda stared back at Alma, not understanding the question.  
  
Alma shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “I mean…the queen regent. You’re referring to her so informally – are exorcists allowed to do that here?” he asked. “If anyone referred to King Lvellie or any monarch so informally in Liorea, they’d get in trouble.”  
  
Kanda fell silent, his thoughts drawing a blank. He rubbed the back of his neck as he looked off to the side. “Here it’s not as strict as long as you address her formally in person.”  
  
Alma hesitated, gaze a bit dubious. “Um, got it.”  
  
Neither of them said anything after that as they remained in the dimly lit stairwell. They avoided eye contact, as if the floor and walls were more engaging than each other. Silence stretched between them in the dark.   
  
“I should get-“  
  
“Where should I-“  
  
They both stopped, having spoken at the same time. Alma gripped at his wrist as he looked down, face a bit warm. “Um – sorry,” he apologized. “I just wanted to ask where I should go? I’ve only been in the servants’ quarters, so I don’t really know where to go from here.”  
  
Kanda glanced toward the stairwell. “Here,” he said as he started up them.  
  
Alma followed. He didn’t say anything, their footsteps echoing against the stone walls. The stairwell was steep and twisted, but it soon led them to a narrow hall – another route that was used by servants.   
  
Kanda nodded down one direction. “If you keep following that way, there will be another stairwell – it’ll lead you to an exit that’s on the north end. Head west and you’ll be back at the stables.”  
  
Alma nodded. He paused, turning back to Kanda as he smiled gently. “Thanks for earlier.”  
  
Kanda stilled as he met Alma’s gaze. Ears burning, he looked away somewhat dumbly.  
  
Alma hesitated, not yet leaving. He bit the inside of his cheek a bit nervously before speaking once more. “Um…maybe, I’ll see you again later?” The words were spoken tentatively and Alma fidgeted with his hands. “I’ll have to do my chores in the stables, but if you wanted to come by maybe-“  
  
Kanda tensed. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”  
  
Alma quieted. Kanda’s response had been brusque, blunt, and direct. Alma was at a loss for how to respond; he looked down, doing his best to ignore the way his stomach knotted. “Oh. That’s okay.”  
  
Kanda didn’t look at Alma. He hadn’t missed the tinge of hurt in the stable boy’s words and inwardly grimaced. “Look, it’s not-“  
  
“It’s fine,” Alma said. He looked up and forced a small, weak smile. “Really, don’t worry about it. It’s not that important.”  
  
Before Kanda could say anything, Alma took a step back. “Um, thanks again,” he managed before turning to leave.  
  
Kanda watched, the stable boy already hurrying off. Within seconds, Alma was out of sight, disappearing into the darkness of the dimly lit passage.  
  
Kanda released a breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding. His chest still pinched as he thought of the disappointment that had trickled into Alma’s voice, but he forced the sensation away.  
  
Like Alma had said, it wasn’t that important.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had originally planned to update on Friday, but my schedule is sort of all over the place this week so tonight ended up being easier. >.< (I started my class and while I love it hello paper writing I did not miss the time you and energy you take.)
> 
> I’ve been trying to figure out a posting schedule for this fic, and I think I’m about to give up on doing a set schedule. (Time does not exist in 2020 and I cannot be the only one who has come to this conclusion.) I’m looking at toggling weekly and biweekly updates, depending on how things go (at minimum two chapters will be posted a month, but possibly up to four). In general, I think I like the quicker post schedule for myself because it’s more incentive to write. I’m currently 18 chapters in, and if I can get a dent of writing in this month and for NaNoWriMo, I’m hoping to have this full fic drafted by the end of December. (We’ll see!)
> 
> For chapter notes - I’m mostly taking a different approach with Kanda and Alma in this fic. Normally, they either take forever to meet or there’s immediate tension/friction between them (or both). While their first meeting in the last chapter was a bit rocky, I really wanted to explore a softer side of them and how they develop. It’s not something I’ve written often, and I was really interested in exploring that budding attraction (especially with Kanda - in canon it doesn’t work because of his history as a second exorcist, but here, he’s more a normal teenage, so exploring those feelings from his perspective has been something I’ve really been interested in).
> 
> Allen and Lavi are almost similar, but not quite. They already have a foundation to their relationship, though there are some guarded elements that have yet to be explored. Those two are definitely more on the slowburn end here, though I’m hoping the pacing flows along with the pacing of Kanda and Alma’s development. (In general, pacing is probably one of the things I’ve been worried about most next to characterization - but hopefully it’s flowing alright and the characters’ actions are making sense.)
> 
> There’s still a lot of buildup for chapter 8, but 9 and on I promise it picks up. :3 I hope you all enjoyed this chapter!


	8. A Mistake Made

Three days had passed since Kanda had seen the stable boy and he couldn’t stop thinking about him.  
  
It should have been easy for Kanda. It wasn’t as though he had spoken to Alma that often – they had only interacted a few times, hadn’t they? He was just visiting from Liorea and would be leaving soon enough after the examination. Until then, Alma would be busy managing the horses and Kanda had his own things to worry about. Seeing Alma again wasn’t one of them.  
  
Despite this, he still felt guilty. He hadn’t forgotten the look on Alma’s face when he last saw the stable boy and refused to meet with him again.  
  
Irritation flared in Kanda’s veins. He didn’t need to feel guilty – he had nothing to feel guilty _for_. Alma had said it was fine, hadn’t he? That it wasn’t important? Surely Alma wouldn’t have said that if he hadn’t meant it.  
  
He exhaled as he shook his head. Kanda was giving this way too much thought and it would just be better if he didn’t see the stable boy again, period. What was wrong with him? They didn’t even _know_ each other and he wasn’t sure why he allowed Alma to have such an effect on him. _‘It’s better this way.’_  
  
The advisors rambled on, their words nothing more than a dull echo in Kanda’s ears. He hadn’t done well to pay attention; Kanda had practically been dragged into the meeting hall by Mahoja, his aunt’s personal guard obnoxiously resolute in making sure that the prince showed up. Kanda had been tempted to fight her – he didn’t need to be bogged down with anything else until after the examination.  
  
 _‘So fucking stupid,’_ Kanda thought, his gaze flickering across the table. All the advisors were present. Among them, the duke had also joined, seated near Anita and across from Kanda.  
  
Kanda still didn’t understand why the hell the duke was at this meeting.   
  
An advisor looked over at Legory – one of the barons in the court. “We’ve heard that Liorea has begun to implement additional security measures with the recent string of akuma attacks and disappearances. Is this true?”  
  
“It is.” Legory’s answer was smooth as he elaborated. “Since Liorea is home to the Black Order, we’ve been able to employ the CROWs to work to our defenses as well. As many of you are aware, they’ve traditionally been reserved for the Order. However, we’ve begun stationing them elsewhere.”  
  
He paused before continuing. “We’ve been in dialogue with Othelion and recently sent some CROWs to their kingdom. The purpose of my time here is not only the exorcist examination, but to also see if such needs are warranted in Ilveria. Though I can’t imagine they wouldn’t be, all things considered. As you all know, these soldiers are only a few steps below exorcists – with how small the Ilverian unit is, it would make sense to have several stationed here.”  
  
As the conversation shifted, Kanda eyed Legory. Maybe the duke wasn’t so useless after all, as annoying as he was. While he didn’t like to admit it, Legory had a point; the CROWs, from Kanda’s understanding, were highly skilled. If they were no longer being limited to protecting the Black Order, then having some in Ilveria would be beneficial.  
  
“We’ve been looking into increasing our security, due to some concerns regarding the akuma,” Anita explained. “We’ve contemplated seals in the meantime, but for a long-term solution, it could be wise to bring some of these soldiers here. We don’t want to risk anything happening to our people.”  
  
“Yes, I imagined that’d be the case,” Legory said. His expression shifted, eyes turning hard. “I should warn you, though – these CROWs are not invincible. Several went missing on their way to Othelion.”  
  
An uneasy hush fell over the table, a few of the advisors whispering to each other anxiously. Kanda also had now become engrossed in the discussion. He recalled his aunt telling him this before, though no further details had been given. “Did anyone see what happened?” he asked, speaking for the first time since the meeting started.  
  
“A few guards,” Legory answered. He pressed his fingers to the side of his face. “They said it was some winged monster – some sort of akuma. But we can’t be certain, unfortunately.”  
  
Kanda tensed. _‘A winged akuma…’_  
  
“What we need is more exorcists,” the baron spoke. “They’re the only ones who can actually kill akuma – it doesn’t matter how skilled at sorcery the guards are-”  
  
“We need to keep calm during these times,” Anita reminded the advisor, her tone firm. She turned back to the duke. “Legory, would you be able to inquire about us having several CROWs stationed here as Othelion has? I’d like to begin that process, so long as everyone else is in favor.”  
  
The advisors all exchanged glances before nodding their head in agreement.  
  
Legory turned to Anita. “Very well, Your Majesty. I’ll see that Matthew sends a correspondence immediately to begin that process. These CROWs are centralized in Liorea, but we’d like to see them stationed in other kingdoms as an extension of our alliance.”  
  
“We appreciate it greatly,” Anita said.  
  
The meeting adjourned shortly after, the sound of chairs clattering as the attendees dispersed. Kanda stood, eager to leave. It wasn’t even his usual desire to get out of the stuffy meeting hall – he wanted to find Lavi and ask more about these CROWs. Especially if they’d be coming to Ilveria.  
  
Before Kanda could leave, an advisor stopped him – the baron who had spoken up earlier during the meeting. “Your Highness.”  
  
Kanda ignored the way the title grated on his nerves. He inhaled somewhat sharply as he turned. “What?”  
  
The baron wavered. He was a sturdily built middle-aged man with short cropped hair and a neatly trimmed beard, broad shouldered, though a bit shorter than Kanda. His usually confident demeanor appeared oddly hesitant, which only irritated Kanda further.  
  
Finally, he spoke. “From everyone’s understanding, you will no longer be an active exorcist after the examination.” The baron’s words were cautious, but he continued regardless. “But some of the advisors are wondering if you’ve given any thought about future prospects – about a spouse. If you choose one, you may be able to return to exorcism sooner, even before your coronation.”  
  
Kanda stared, completely dumbfounded. His expression quickly darkened, the baron’s words sinking in. “I’m _not_ -“  
  
“Baron Taro,” Anita spoke, tone slightly sharp. She walked over, stepping in-between him and Kanda.   
  
The baron bowed his head, a bit caught off guard by the intervention. “Your Majesty,” he acknowledged. “I just wanted to check in with Prince Yuu, about the possibility of a spouse and ensuring things would be secure for the throne.”  
  
Anita eyed him warily, but nodded. “I understand,” she said, before glancing back at Kanda. “We’ve already discussed it – Prince Yuu will be thinking about it more, especially for when the Midsummer Celebration comes. We’ve already sent out invitations to all of the nobility in the kingdom.”  
  
The baron nodded, appeased by the answer. “I see – thank you.”  
  
Kanda’s fists clenched. He looked between Anita and the baron briefly before stalking out of the meeting hall.  
  
He couldn’t believe this. He couldn’t _believe it_ -  
  
Kanda stopped. He hadn’t gotten too far from the meeting hall yet, but he needed to steady himself. He needed to breathe, his lungs for whatever reason straining to get air. _‘Fuck…’_  
  
From behind, Kanda heard someone approach. The light, graceful steps were more than enough of a giveaway as to who it was though.  
  
“Yuu,” Anita said as she approached Kanda. She had left the meeting hall briskly as well, finding her nephew swiftly after. “Yuu-“  
  
Kanda turned sharply. He glared at her. “You didn’t have to speak for me,” he snapped. “I can speak for myself and I could have answered that _stupid_ question-“  
  
Anita sighed. “I know you’re frustrated. It wasn’t right for him to put you on the spot like that.”  
  
“So, you had to answer for me? You practically said I was going to fucking pick a fiancée!”  
  
“That is _not_ what I said,” Anita clarified. “I said you’d be considering it – as you _should_. Even if it’s not for a few more years, this is something you _must_ think about.”  
  
“Tch,” Kanda sneered. “This is ridiculous. I shouldn’t have to have a _spouse_ to go back to exorcism.”  
  
Anita exhaled. “It’s to be expected. The advisors are only worried and rightfully so-“  
  
Kanda didn’t care to listen anymore and abruptly turned, walking away from his aunt before he had a chance to lash out further. He was too heated, his blood boiling in his veins. He was over this. He was so _done_ _.  
  
_ Anita tried to call after him. “Yuu!“  
  
Kanda ignored her. He didn’t care if she was the only family he had left – he didn’t want to talk to her.  
  
He didn’t want to talk to anyone.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Tiedoll returned to the castle by mid-afternoon. He had just finished another patrol, yet again without much to show for. On one hand, it may have been a good thing; less disruption and akuma sightings could have meant that things were calming down. There had been no unusual activity – no strange noises, or signs. Marie had even tried to listen for anything, his sensitive ears not once detecting anything out of the ordinary.  
  
Despite this, Tiedoll couldn’t quell the tremor of unease that tickled his spine. He couldn’t ignore the way something dark nudged at the back of his thoughts, a quiet reminder that something wasn’t right.  
  
“Still nothing,” Marie said, as they entered the castle. “It’s been really quiet, even in the forest.”  
  
Tiedoll frowned. Marie was right – they had started to move their patrols a bit more into the woods since that was where akuma activity tended to be the most frequent. “It has. But there was an akuma just three days ago and I don’t want us to lower our guard with this.”  
  
“Right.” Marie paused, his volume lowering as he continued. “You know, the last two times an attack happened was when Kanda was out. I know it could have been a coincidence, but at the same time…”  
  
Tiedoll didn’t say anything. They had just stopped inside the entrance hall, the grand staircase up ahead. A few servants were arranging and tending to some of the flower vases that decorated the hall, but they were a safe distance away.   
  
Regardless, the exorcist general spoke quietly as he turned back to Marie. “It would be best not to suggest such things aloud – not yet, at least. I’d hate to cause even more of a stir then there already has been.” He sighed gently. “Queen Anita is worried enough as it is, and I think Kanda may be reaching his limit as well.”  
  
Marie nodded in understanding. A thoughtful look crossed his features. “Have you talked to him since the incident?”  
  
Tiedoll fell silent, his expression turning somber. The answer was simple – no, not in depth. He had seen Kanda in the last few days, usually when the prince was practicing with Daisya in the training room. But Tiedoll had noticed that Kanda had been avoidant in his behavior; he hadn’t spoken to Tiedoll more than the bare minimum needed and had disappeared whenever threatened with the chance of being caught alone.  
  
Tiedoll was no fool – he knew that Kanda was avoiding him.  
  
“We haven’t,” he finally answered. “Not of anything regarding the last attack, at least. I don’t think he’s been too keen on speaking about it.”  
  
Marie’s lips pressed together, his brow pinching. “He must still feel guilty,” he observed, careful to keep his words quiet. “You know how he is. He won’t say it, but he knows he made a mistake.”   
  
Tiedoll hummed. “I’ll try to find him today,” he decided. “I need to report my findings to Queen Anita. Are you going to find Daisya?”  
  
Marie nodded. “I think he mentioned he was going to spar with that Liorean exorcist – Daisya seems to like practicing with him a lot.”  
  
“Oh, excellent.” Tiedoll smiled in approval. “Allen’s very skilled from what I’ve seen – it’s good he’s practicing with someone outside our unit. Hopefully, Kanda’s been doing the same.”  
  
“I think he has a few times.” Marie turned to leave. “I’ll go see if they’re in the training room – if they’re not there, they may have gone outside.”  
  
“I’ll come find you in a bit.”  
  
Marie nodded once more and they parted ways.  
  
Tiedoll started up the staircase, intent on finding Anita. He recalled she had mentioned having a meeting during the hour, but if anything, he would be able to speak to Mahoja.   
  
He crossed into an open-air walkway that acted as a bridge between the north and south sections of the castle. Two rows of pillars stood on each side, the farthest out connecting to the railing, thick and carved of white stone. As usual, the weather was pleasant; the air was fresh, the walkway roofed and providing some comfortable shade.  
  
Tiedoll kept his pace leisurely. With how nice it was, he liked to take his time. Maybe he’d even get some inspiration for a painting later – he hadn’t worked on anything in a while and liked to dabble in art whenever he was fortunate enough to have some free time. Maybe in the evening, he could start something.  
  
As he passed the midsection of the walkway, Tiedoll glanced to the left to get a better view of the scenery outside. It was the direction that faced the east gardens and was always a stunning view.   
  
When he looked, Tiedoll was surprised. He hadn’t realized it at first, but Kanda was on the walkway. He had been somewhat obscured by the first layer of pillars, having gone to one of the window ledges; the prince was seated on it, one knee brought up as his arm rested on his, his back pressed against the side. He wasn’t looking in Tiedoll’s direction though. Instead, he focused outside, expression distant.  
  
Tiedoll suspected that Kanda hadn’t even noticed him.  
  
Quietly, the general walked over. He was surprised that Kanda didn’t turn; usually he was more alert than that. He took care in his approach for this reason, his voice soft as he spoke. “You know you’re not supposed to be on that ledge.”  
  
The words were kindly spoken, though Kanda turned abruptly. A flicker of alarm flashed in his eyes before his expression shifted: first into something akin to abashment, then annoyance. He scoffed, as he looked back outside. “I’m not ten. It’s not like I’m going to fall.”  
  
“No, you probably won’t.” Tiedoll took a step closer to the ledge, opposite of Kanda. “I haven’t seen you in this spot for a while. You used to always come here when you were younger. No one could ever keep you off that ledge for long.”  
  
Kanda frowned, keeping his attention focused on the gardens. “Did you just get back?”  
  
“We did. Though we didn’t come across anything unusual.” Tiedoll’s gaze flickered to Kanda. “We never talked about what happened with the last akuma attack.”  
  
Kanda’s brow furrowed. “I already told you what happened,” he said. “I was just checking for seal points and the stupid thing came out of nowhere-“  
  
Tiedoll shook his head. “No, that isn’t what I mean,” he said. He eyed Kanda warily, a glimmer of concern in his eyes before he sighed. “I know it has been a challenging last few weeks. But being an exorcist and of royal blood – there are expectations that come with that.”  
  
Kanda fought a twitch, already perturbed by how the conversation was turning. “Is this another lecture?” he grumbled. “Because I’m getting really sick of them…”  
  
“I’d like to think it isn’t, but perhaps it is,” Tiedoll said. “And they’ve only been made because people don’t want anything to happen to you.”  
  
Kanda turned back to Tiedoll sharply. “Yeah, well I’m tired of everyone _saying that_.” His words were cutting and raw, eyes heated. “I can’t go two fucking minutes without someone saying something or making some stupid decision for me!”  
  
The exclamation broke through before Kanda even realized what he was saying, his emotional response a visceral one. Becoming an inactive exorcist, having more responsibilities to manage, having to think of a bloody _courtship_ – dealing with only one of those things was enough to make his head spin, but all together it was crushing. Kanda didn’t have much of a say in most of these things, as much as he loathed to admit it; at his core, he knew he was stuck. That he would have to give in and comply – to fit some mold – that was so terribly _suffocating_.   
  
For a fleeting second, he struggled to breathe.   
  
Kanda inhaled and looked away, fist balled tight. “I’m just…so fucking _tired-_ “  
  
He broke off. He hated how he sounded – like some petulant child whining and throwing a tantrum. But he couldn’t help it; the outburst had just _happened_ , everything boiling over inside. It didn’t matter if Tiedoll was only trying to help or if people worried. It didn’t _matter_.  
  
Tiedoll didn’t say anything. He remained calm, his gaze having softened; the prince was visibly tense, composure fractured in a way that the general hadn’t seen in some time.   
  
Expression sympathetic, Tiedoll spoke quietly. “No one ever said it would be easy.”  
  
Kanda chewed the inside of his cheek, jaw tight. He kept his focus on the gardens outside. Below, he could see the pond, the lotus buds floating on the surface, the petals closed up against the sun.  
  
When Kanda didn’t say anything, Tiedoll continued. “You’ve been training a lot these last few weeks,” he pointed out. “I know the exorcist examination is just a few days away, but perhaps you should take some of today or tomorrow to focus on something else. You may regain a bit of your sanity back if you do.”  
  
Kanda scoffed under his breath. “What the hell am I supposed to do?”  
  
The general hummed thoughtfully. “Just something to take your mind off things,” he said. “And I don’t mean sword practice – actually take time for yourself. Maybe spend time with a friend or go out riding on the grounds.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. Did Tiedoll think he could really just turn off to everything? That was completely _ludicrous_ -  
  
Before he could finish the thought, Alma’s face flashed through his thoughts.  
  
Kanda repressed the notion quickly. His chest pinched, his gaze once more lingering on the lotus pond below. The buds continued to sway, the surface of the water as smooth as glass, sunlight reflecting against it vibrantly. “Tch. I doubt I’ll be able to.”  
  
“It was only a suggestion,” Tiedoll reminded him. He smiled at Kanda gently. “Just take some time for yourself, whatever that may look like.”  
  
Kanda didn’t bother to respond.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“What do you think?” Allen asked.  
  
Alma looked around in complete awe. They had just entered the north wing, having come from the lower west level. During the last few days, Alma had kept to that area of the castle, finding comfort in being where the other servants were. When he wasn’t there, he had been at the stables; there wasn’t a shortage of work and he had kept busy.  
  
But when Allen had persuaded him away from the stables to show him around, Alma had had a difficult time saying no.  
  
His eyes were wide as he looked around. They had come to the top of the grand staircase near the main entrance hall, the marble steps all but glistening beneath the light of the chandelier. Art adorned the walls and the windows were breathtakingly luminous.   
  
“It’s…really amazing,” Alma finally managed. He held Timcanpy, the golden golem nestled in the stable boy’s arms. “Are you sure it’s okay I come with you, though?”  
  
“Yeah, Lavi won’t mind.” Allen smiled reassuringly. “The library isn’t too far from here, but I thought it’d be fun to stop by and look at some things on our way.”  
  
Alma’s eyes glimmered with excitement. Although he had been nervous about going through the castle more, he felt at ease being with Allen. Since he had been staying in a different area of the castle and knew Lavi, Allen knew how to get around.  
  
It was also nice to have someone to walk around with. Alma always preferred the company.  
  
“What all have you gotten to see?” Alma asked.  
  
Allen thought on the question. “Well, mostly the different training areas. There’s a room inside, and a larger field outside. It’s where the examination will be.”  
  
As Allen said this, Alma’s thoughts shifted. Right – the examination was only a few days away. It was strange to think about how quickly time was passing.  
  
Alma kicked his foot against the smooth, marble floor, the surface glossy. “So, do all of the exorcists get observed?”  
  
Allen nodded. “Technically. These examinations happen every two years to make sure all exorcists are doing well. But it’s a bigger deal when there’s someone who’s formally being recognized,” he explained. “People like Legory who are tied to the royal family come for those. Otherwise it’s usually another Liorean official who’ll evaluate everything.”  
  
“Got it,” Alma said, his thoughts once more beginning to wander. If all the exorcists were being examined, that probably meant Kanda would be, too.  
  
Alma instinctively pushed aside the thought. He hadn’t seen Kanda in several days, and probably wouldn’t again. Not that it mattered – they had only met a few times and it wasn’t like they knew each other well.   
  
He told himself this, but his chest tightened stubbornly all the same.  
  
“Anyways, we should head this way,” Allen suggested. He looked back at Alma and smiled. “Lavi showed me the ballroom yesterday – the staff have been cleaning and preparing it, since there’s a celebration in a few weeks, but we can probably sneak in to get a look.”  
  
Alma’s eyes lit up and he nodded his head eagerly. “Okay!”  
  
They started off, Allen leading the way. Alma took the opportunity to take in the sights. Even back in Liorea, he wasn’t really allowed into such nice spaces; the castle there was strictly sectioned off. Alma had only been in the servants’ quarters or the kitchens, while most of his time was spent in the stables.  
  
 _‘I can’t believe people really_ _live here…’_ Alma thought, amazed that people got to walk through these corridors _daily_. Didn’t they get distracted? Alma didn’t know how he’d get anything done; he’d easily get too caught up in staring at everything, every turn and corner mesmerizing beyond words.   
  
They eventually came to a pair of tall doors, the wood smooth and polished. It was inlaid with gold detailing, the pattern intricate and reminiscent of foliage. Alma was immediately taken with it; if Allen had only brought him there to look at the door, he would have been thrilled. His hands twitched as he felt the sudden need to touch the pattern.  
  
The doors were ajar and Allen glanced inside. He motioned for Alma to follow. “Here.”  
  
Alma peeked inside, still holding Timcanpy. Eyes wide, his mouth fell open. “ _This_ is the ballroom?”  
  
Alma was at a loss for words. The whole castle had been a sight to venture through, but the ballroom was beyond anything Alma had ever seen. The room was large and circular, the ceiling stretching into a dome as crystal chandeliers hung above. Sunlight spilled through the tall windows, which covered almost every angle of the room; a tall pair of doors toward the east led out onto a terraced garden.  
  
“It’s really pretty, isn’t it?” Allen asked before he glanced around. They stood at the top of a staircase, which led down into the ballroom. “I’m surprised it’s empty. I thought there’d at least be a few others in here.”  
  
Alma stepped inside. It was too tempting not to; he could have easily lingered in that room the rest of the day, admiring its sheer beauty alone. He couldn’t imagine when he’d ever see something so fine again. “And they actually have parties in here? People get to dance in here?”  
  
Allen laughed. “That’s what it’s for. Kind of a shame we won’t be here long enough to see what it’s like in a few weeks.”  
  
Alma turned back to Allen. “What about Lavi? Are he and Bookman staying any longer? Maybe you could ask him.”  
  
Allen paused. “Maybe,” he said, his expression suddenly turning contemplative. “Lavi mentioned they were planning on returning to Liorea after the examination, but I should ask if anything’s changed. Can’t say I’d blame him if he stayed.”  
  
Alma nodded. He realized that they should continue, but he took one final glance at the ballroom before stepping back outside. “Do you want to go to the library next-?”  
  
He cut off. Just down the corridor, several people were walking – two noblemen by the looks of it, possibly advisors. They weren’t alone; Legory was also with them, currently in mid-discussion.   
  
Alma couldn’t focus on what they were saying, his body stiffening up in fear as they drew closer. Allen noticed them as well – along with Alma’s visceral reaction.   
  
“Hey, it’s okay,” he reassured gently. “You’re not doing anything wrong.”  
  
Alma wasn’t able to respond, the three nobles already too close. As soon as Alma glanced back, he regretted doing so; he unintentionally made eye contact with the duke, who had taken notice of him. Politely, Legory excused himself, before walking over to where Allen and Alma were.  
  
Immediately, Alma stared down at his feet. _‘Crap…’_  
  
Allen bowed his head politely as the duke stopped near them. Alma followed suit. He still kept his gaze downcast, his heart beating nervously.  
  
“Walker,” Legory greeted, acknowledging Allen with an uncomfortable formality. His gaze sharply landed on Alma, who he then addressed in a more irritable manner. “Don’t you have work to do? I didn’t realize your position suddenly required you to be in the ballroom.”  
  
Alma went rigid. Without saying anything, he hurriedly handed Timcanpy back to Allen before attempting to leave-  
  
“Stay.”  
  
Alma stilled, not even getting a second step in before the command had been given. Without saying anything, he complied, stepping back against the wall.  
  
Allen frowned. Turning back to Legory, his voice dropped a degree. “I was just showing him around, Your Grace.”  
  
Legory waved his hand dismissively. “I’m sure you were – just as I’m sure your time could be better spent,” he said. “Leave.”  
  
Allen’s gaze darkened. He didn’t leave at first, his silver eyes sparking icily.  
  
Alma quickly intervened, his attention shifting to Allen. “It’s okay,” he said, though his voice was barely audible. “Really.”  
  
Looking back in Alma’s direction, the exorcist visibly hesitated. Allen remained wary, seemingly unwilling to leave Alma alone with Leogry. However, he finally nodded.  
  
Alma exhaled as Allen left. He continued to avoid Legory’s stare, though he could see the duke in his peripheral. Frankly, Alma was terrified; Legory rarely bothered to speak to him directly, and when he did, it was never a pleasant experience. He hoped that whatever the duke had to say, it would be quick.  
  
Legory watched the stable boy, his gaze like that of a hawk. He sighed loftily. “Alma.”  
  
Alma didn’t say anything, still avoiding eye contact.   
  
Legory hummed. “You’re a stable boy – someone who works in a _stable_.” His tone was strangely conversational, yet cold all the same. “I’ll only say this once, because I don’t really have the patience again. You’re here _only_ because Klaud Nine insisted you be. Not because anyone wants you here, but because she wouldn’t shut up about it being a good opportunity for you.”  
  
Alma winced. He knew that Legory was right about that much – he had never been allowed to accompany anyone anywhere before and had only been able to do so because Klaud had bothered to advocate for him. “I know-“  
  
Legory cut him off. “If you’re not satisfied with your position, I have no problem sending you back to being a scullion when we return.” He crossed his arms, as he raised an eyebrow. “But that’d make it much more difficult to pay off that debt of yours, wouldn’t it?”  
  
Tensing, Alma finally looked back at Legory. He opened his mouth to speak, but his throat ran dry, the words locking up in his chest.  
  
Legory smirked, knowing well he had made his point. “Don’t think anyone has forgotten about what happened – I certainly haven’t, and had I been able to make the final call, you wouldn’t even be employed. You’ll do yourself a favor by not drawing anymore unwanted attention,” he said. “Get on, now. And try not to take anything on your way out.”  
  
The words slapped Alma across the face, stunning him. He couldn’t even think, every muscle in his body having turned rigid.   
  
Abruptly, Alma left, hurrying off as fast as he could.  
  
  


* * *

  
Kanda hadn’t lingered in the walkway for too much longer. After being found by Tiedoll, he knew it was a matter of time before someone else tracked him down. The advisors, Mahoja, Anita – anyone could have found him. After Tiedoll, he didn’t want to speak to anyone else. He was still angry and frustrated, though the general had somehow lessened his agitation. If anything, Kanda had started to ground himself at least.  
  
He took his leave, keeping to some of the smaller halls and less traversed parts of the castle. A few servants passed him, politely acknowledging the prince, but aside from that he was lucky; he had yet to run into anyone else.  
  
Truthfully, Kanda didn’t have a specific destination in mind. He only knew that he wanted to go outside, where there were no more walls and only fresh air. Annoyed, he realized that he wouldn’t be able to leave the castle grounds unless he had someone accompany him, but there was at least enough space Kanda could find somewhere to go. As pathetic as it was, he wasn’t above trying to grasp at the illusion of being somewhere else.  
  
Maybe Tiedoll was right. Maybe he needed to focus on something else.  
  
He frowned. He didn’t know what to focus on. Every time he attempted to clear his head, he felt an unyielding desire to train or do _something_ involving exorcism. He even considered finding Lavi. As annoying as the junior bookman could be, he was actually clever and insightful at times. Maybe Lavi had uncovered something regarding the recent akuma attacks...  
  
Kanda shook his head. No – no, he needed some _time_. Even if only for a few hours.   
  
Eventually, he made his way outside – a success, considering how he had slipped away with ease. He had exited near the north grounds, though, and the thought of riding crossed his mind. Usually, he only used the horses when venturing out with the other exorcists – he hadn’t been riding for the sake of doing so in a while. Perhaps, he’d do that like Tiedoll had suggested.  
  
 _‘Or perhaps you want to see that stable boy.’_  
  
The thought slipped into his mind and he immediately fell into denial. No. _No_ , he wasn’t interested in seeing Alma again. He didn’t have a reason to and it wasn’t like Kanda could control if Alma was the stable boy. If they happened to see each other, it’d be completely accidental.   
  
If.  
  
Kanda pushed the irritating thoughts aside. It was ridiculous – he didn’t need to feel weird about possibly running into Alma. He just needed a horse and then would be out for a bit.   
  
_‘This is so stupid,’_ he thought as he ignored the strange way his stomach knotted.   
  
He entered into the stables, a few guards leaving with some horses to go on a patrol. They nodded to Kanda respectfully, though he ignored them, quickly trying to locate the horse master. _‘He’s around here somewhere…’_  
  
Kanda slowed, a bit wary when he realized he was getting close to the stables where the Lioreans had placed their horses for their stay. He didn’t see or hear anyone, though, and took a breath as he moved past it.  
  
Someone sniffled.  
  
He stopped. At first, Kanda thought he may have imagined it; he only heard the horses moving around in the stables, occasionally whinnying and snorting softly, their hooves beating against the soft earth. Kanda frowned as he looked back at the stalls. He didn’t see anyone.  
  
Shrugging it off, Kanda continued on-  
  
Again, he heard something – a sharp inhale, as though someone were trying to catch their breath.  
  
 _‘What the hell?’_ He frowned. Kanda looked around, at first not sure where the noise had come from. He took a few steps around the wooden building, quiet as he approached the back. As he got closer to the corner, he noticed someone sitting against the back wall, their boots the first thing he saw.  
  
He also realized that whoever was back there was crying.  
  
Silently, Kanda panicked. Crying – he wasn’t good with crying or any major show of emotion. The impulse to go back rippled through his core and he almost turned on his heel, his flight response strong. It wasn’t his problem. He didn’t need to deal with whatever it was that was going on back there.  
  
But then, something nudged him – some annoyingly tiny yet potent nudge that kept him from running off. Kanda cursed himself; he wanted to leave, but something kept him from doing so. For whatever reason, he just couldn’t walk away. He took a few quiet steps forward as he looked around the corner.  
  
He recognized Alma immediately.  
  
The stable boy didn’t acknowledge him and didn’t appear aware that anyone else was around. He had curled up behind the stables, his legs pulled up to his chest. His crying had softened, causing Kanda to suspect that he might have been calming down. But the fact remained: Alma had been upset by something and it had been enough to bring him to tears.  
  
Kanda’s nerves twitched. He shifted somewhat awkwardly, unsure of what to do – should he say something? Leave the stable boy alone? He quickly came to the realization that he definitely didn’t like Alma crying, but-  
  
As he moved, he stepped on a twig. _‘Shit.’_  
  
Alma’s head snapped up. He turned quickly, eyes rimmed with red and his cheeks wet. Surprise took hold of his expression as soon as he saw he was not alone.   
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He internally panicked, not sure what to do; Alma was just there and he still looked _upset_. What had even happened? God, he wished Alma wasn’t so distraught – he had this sad, pitiful look on his face that was just terrible and it made Kanda _uncomfortable_.   
  
Finally, Kanda spoke. His words were terse. “What happened?”  
  
Alma tensed. He wiped his face on his sleeve as he stood up. “It-It’s nothing,” he stammered, voice a bit shaky. “Sorry, I just…I just had a reaction to the hay. That was all.”  
  
Kanda scowled, swiftly detecting the lie. “You fucking _work_ with horses,” he stated, not hesitating to call Alma out. “You’re around hay all the time, aren’t you?”  
  
Alma flinched and Kanda immediately felt a stab of guilt. Maybe he shouldn’t have said that.  
  
Quickly, Kanda tried to backtrack. “If you don’t want to talk about it, I’m not going to make you,” he said. “But just…don’t lie about it. That shit pisses me off.”  
  
Alma bit his lip. He rubbed his wrist as he looked down, exhaling as he wiped his cheeks once more. “Please don’t tell anyone you saw me like this…”  
  
Kanda turned back to Alma, perplexed. His brow furrowed. “Why would I tell anyone? If something’s upsetting you, it’s not like you should get in trouble for that.”  
  
Alma looked up. “Ah, I mean – nevermind,” he brushed off. He wrapped his arms around his body as he averted his gaze. “Um, did you need a horse?”  
  
Kanda wavered at the change of topic. “Yeah,” he said. “I was looking for Jirou, or one of the stable hands…”  
  
He trailed off. Although Alma had been the one to change the topic, Kanda was still unable to forget how upset the stable boy had been only moments before. Had something happened? Well, something _had_ happened, but Kanda had no idea what.  
  
Alma nodded. “I can get you set up with one – I have to get back to work anyways.”  
  
He didn’t wait for Kanda to say anything and started back around to where the horses were. Kanda eyed Alma warily, but followed.   
  
As they walked around to the front, Alma spoke. “Um, do you have a preference of which horse you need?”  
  
Kanda shrugged. “I’m just going riding,” he said. “Tiedoll said I probably need a break, so I guess I’ll try that.”  
  
Alma blinked. “Oh.” He glanced around, and to Kanda’s surprise, went into the stables where the Liorean horses were.   
  
A bit confused, Kanda followed. He stopped as he saw where Alma had come to – a stable with a sandy-colored horse inside.  
  
“This is Saori,” Alma said, as he looked back at Kanda with a weakened smile. “She’s really sweet if you’re just looking to go riding – I rode her while we traveled here. If you want, I’ll saddle her for you.”  
  
Kanda paused. He wasn’t sure how he felt about using one of the Lioreans’ horses, though Alma seemed genuine in his offer. He shrugged. “Sure.”  
  
“Great.” Alma went to work, going to the back to collect the harness and saddle.   
  
Kanda watched. Alma busied himself, not bothering to make any conversation. Despite his earlier insistence that things were fine, his eyes still remained red and slightly puffy, causing Kanda’s concern to fester.   
  
As Alma returned, he started to unlock the stall. Kanda took his chance. “Are you okay?”  
  
Alma stilled. He looked at Kanda, confused. “What?”  
  
Kanda met Alma’s gaze and he momentarily forgot how to speak. He broke eye contact as he fumbled with his words. “You…seemed really upset back there,” he finally managed, though he hated how awkward and strained his speech was. “No one hurt you, did they?”  
  
Alma blinked, somewhat surprised. He shook his head. “No…not like that,” he said, as he continued to open the stall. “It was my fault, anyways. I shouldn’t have been wandering around inside the castle.”  
  
Kanda scowled. “Did someone say something to you about that?”  
  
Alma wavered. He gripped the stall door railing as he bit his lip. “It’s not appropriate. In Liorea servants have specific spaces they can be in,” he finally answered. “I was walking around with Allen, but the duke saw…”  
  
Kanda snorted. “Fuck him,” he grumbled under his breath.  
  
He realized seconds after that Alma had fallen completely silent.  
  
Kanda looked back at the stable boy. Alma’s eyes had widened to the size of saucers, expression filled with shock. Kanda didn’t understand why at first, until he spoke.  
  
“Kanda, you shouldn’t _say that_.” Alma looked around somewhat nervously. “What if someone hears you?”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. _That_ was what Alma was worried about? “I don’t care. He pisses me off every time he opens his mouth. If he’s the one who upset you, then just ignore him.”  
  
Alma brought a hand to his mouth. Unexpectedly, he stifled a laugh, the sound melodious as it bubbled over. “Wow, I just – I just really _wasn’t_ expecting that,” he said, his words broken up by hints of laughter.   
  
Kanda stared, somewhat stunned. He hadn’t expected Alma to laugh of all things, but it was nice. It was so sweet and soothing to hear, Kanda almost forgot what was happening-  
  
He really liked Alma’s laugh.  
  
Alma finally composed himself. “Sorry – I hadn’t laughed like that in a while,” he said, before he smiled at Kanda. His blue eyes lit up, a spark in them. “I really appreciate it. Thank you for making me feel better.”  
  
Kanda flushed, his face heating up. He quickly looked away, silently wishing he had a way to cool off. “Tch. It’s fine. You shouldn’t feel badly for wanting to look around.”  
  
Alma brushed his bangs aside. “Ah, yeah, but I think the rest of the castle will be off limits while I’m here…except the servants’ quarters. I can spend time there, at least.” He paused, gaze turning wistful. “I wanted to see the city, too, but I don’t know. It’s probably better if I don’t.”  
  
Brow knitting together, Kanda crossed his arms. “Just go if you want to. If you’re not working the whole time, you don’t have to be stuck here.”  
  
Alma wavered. “But…”  
  
“But what?”  
  
Alma averted his gaze. He swallowed. “Well, I don’t really have anyone to go with. I was thinking that Allen and I could go, but he really seems like he wants to visit with Lavi while he’s here. And I don’t know if I should risk going anywhere after today…”  
  
Kanda’s lips pursed. Despite Alma’s words, it was obvious that the stable boy wanted to go; Kanda could read the signs as clear as day. Alma wasn’t happy about missing out on exploring the city and it once again caused Kanda to feel like crap. Alma looked so down, like some sad puppy that was leashed.  
  
Without thinking, Kanda spoke. “If it’s that important, I’ll go with you.”  
  
The words flew from his lips, but it was too late. Already, Alma had looked up, completely taken by surprise. “Really?”  
  
Kanda stammered. He realized that he was putting himself out there when he shouldn’t have said anything in the first place. He felt the instinctive urge to backtrack, remembering that just a few days ago he had decided that it _wasn’t_ a good idea for him to spend anymore time with Alma. Not when Alma was a stable boy and didn’t realize who Kanda _was_ …   
  
But he couldn’t go back now – not when he saw how painfully _hopeful_ Alma looked. He swallowed.   
  
“Yeah,” he said, his thoughts racing to keep up with his lips. Kanda broke eye contact. “General Tiedoll said I needed a break from things so…this can be it. I guess.”  
  
Alma’s whole face lit up, but a thought passed through him and the light in his eyes dimming. “Are you sure it’s a good idea? I don’t want to get in trouble again. I mean, no one really checks on me out here, but…”  
  
Kanda thought. “Don’t worry about that,” he said. “The duke will probably be busy. If your work is done, he really can’t say anything.”  
  
Alma hesitated as he pondered this. Slowly, his smile returned, gaze warm. “Okay,” he said. “If you really want to…maybe tomorrow? The examination isn’t for three more days, so if you have to train before it won’t interfere.”  
  
Kanda paused before realizing Alma was right. Since the examination was three days away, he’d need to focus the day before – but tomorrow he could spare a few hours. Tiedoll had said it may be good for him.   
  
“Alright,” Kanda agreed. “I’ll meet you here at noon – we can go then.”  
  
Alma nodded eagerly. “That’ll be perfect! I’ll make sure to get all my tasks done early,” he said, once more smiling at Kanda. “Thank you – for offering to go with me. It means a lot.”  
  
Kanda met Alma’s gaze and his breath caught in his throat. The words had been spoken so sweetly and the light in his eyes was so bright – Kanda didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what to think.  
  
He just hoped that he wasn’t making a mistake. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Wednesday! I wanted to get this chapter up since it’s been about two weeks and next week I’ll be a bit busy finishing up a rare pair fic I’ll be sharing. This story is still moving along steadily - I’m currently working on chapter 21, and have a rough estimate on this fic being 26 chapters total (if I’m really lucky, I might be able to get the bulk of the rest of this story knocked out during NaNo, but we’ll see. >.>).
> 
> This chapter was one that I wanted to focus a bit on Kanda and Alma. They both have their own things they’re dealing with, and while their situations are radically different, I wanted there to be this level of connection they have together over it. In a lot of ways, they’re both sharing parallels in that they’re each looking for an escape from something. (I’m not sure how well it’s translated in that sense, but hopefully it’s working. XD)
> 
> As you can imagine, the chapter following this one will focus on what happens when they go into the city together, and it’s one I’m definitely excited to share. X3 
> 
> I realize there’s a lot of buildup with this story since things don’t really get too intense for a few more chapters, but I hope it’s an enjoyable read all the same.
> 
> As always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated! <3


	9. The Ilverian City

“This is getting annoying.”  
  
Road glanced back at Wisely. As always, her eyes were bright amber glowing eerily in the darkness of the moonlit night. Shadows spilled onto the ground, the grass kissed by crystalized droplets of dew. Road had stepped out to the lake, her bare feet close to the edge. Several partially eroded stone steps dipped off into the water, the surface still.  
  
She smiled, her gaze landing on Wisely. “Aw. You’re not wishing you were somewhere else, are you? You’re going to hurt my feelings.”  
  
Wisely huffed. He leaned back against a weeping willow. It loomed on the edge of the water, its long leaves a thin veil that draped against the lake. “You know that’s not what I mean,” he said as he crossed his arms. “I’m just getting tired of waiting – I thought Tyki would have been faster.”  
  
“He just wants to make sure he finds a good one this time,” Road said. “Wouldn’t you rather him do that? You know how messy things get. And you were just saying not too long ago that you hate it when our akuma get wasted.”  
  
“Hmph.” Wisely’s yellow eyes peered out, the silvery reflection of the moon gleaming on the water’s surface.  
  
Still smiling, Road turned away. A black butterfly fluttered by, the creature landing on her finger. “Don’t worry. Tyki will find us a new one soon,” she said. “I know he will.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The next morning, Alma woke up early. Dawn had barely broken, the sky a dusty medley of pink and violet; the temperature outside was cool, the window having been left cracked open overnight. The fresh air trickled in, sweet and refreshing against the mustiness of the room.  
  
Alma shifted in bed, the mattress thin yet comfortable. His internal clock urged him to get up – he always woke by sunrise to check on the horses and get the stalls cleaned out before feeding them.  
  
He also remembered that he was supposed to meet Kanda at noon.  
  
Alma’s heart skipped, his mind growing alert. That was right – Kanda had told him that he’d go with him into the Ilverian city to look around at things together. The notion alone made Alma’s stomach churn anxiously. He was looking forward to going, but the thought of Kanda going with him made his insides turn to butterflies.  
  
He tried not to get too ahead of himself. It was just an outing and Kanda likely didn’t think of it anything more than that. But still – Alma was surprised by the exorcist’s invitation. After how their previous interaction had ended by the lotus pond, he hadn’t expected Kanda to so willingly offer to accompany him.  
  
Quickly, Alma got out of bed. He debated on what to wear, though he realized he didn’t have much to ponder; Alma only owned a few things, all plain and worn with age. _‘It’ll just get messy, anyways,’_ he thought, ignoring the twinge of defeat in his chest. Maybe if he had time after his chores, he could wash off with a sponge bath – that would make him feel better and he wouldn’t look as grimy.  
  
Once dressed, Alma left his room. Despite the early hour, the castle staff was already moving, the scullions and maidservants hard at work. The smell of warm food wafted from the dining hall, leaving Alma’s mouth watering. If he was fast enough, he could grab something.  
  
The dining hall was busy. Since so many servants had to be up early to prepare for the day, most of them were already eating breakfast while the rest of the castle still slumbered. Alma glanced around, for a moment feeling out of place; the servants in Ilveria already had their own social circles and in the last few days Alma hadn’t really fit in with any of them.  
  
That was okay – he would only be in the dining hall for a little bit, anyways.  
  
There was a window where some cooks were giving out breakfast and Alma got his meal – some sausage and rice gruel. He waited for a second, though, his gaze a bit hesitant as he glanced over at the cook – a thin man with his hair tied into braids and dark glasses by the name of Jeryy.  
  
Jeryy paused, taking note of Alma. He smiled, handing him a side of mayonnaise. “Don’t think I forgot, sweetie. You’re the only one who ever asks for it.”  
  
Alma’s eyes brightened. “Thank you!”  
  
Taking his food, Alma found a seat at one of the long tables, a few servants just a couple of seats away. He mixed the mayo into his rice gruel, stirring it before he took a bite.  
  
“Did you hear that Prince Yuu is supposed to be looking for a fiancée?”  
  
“No! Is he really?”  
  
Alma paused, his blue eyes flickering down the table. A few maidservants were seated, all younger and leaning across the table as they gossiped over their breakfast.  
  
“Yes!” One of the maidservant’s nodded her head, her dark eyes wide. “I heard Queen Anita speaking to him yesterday – well, arguing really. He’s supposed to be looking for one at the Midsummer Ball. But he didn’t sound very happy about it.”  
  
One of the other maidservants giggled. “I bet I could change his mind.”  
  
The servant across the table threw a napkin at her playfully. “Oh, stop – you know he’ll have to pick someone who’s nobility.”  
  
Alma looked away, not wanting to eavesdrop. Since arriving in Ilveria, he still hadn’t caught a glimpse of the prince, but couldn’t imagine when he’d ever cross paths with Prince Yuu. Between the exorcist examination and whatever else the prince had to deal with as royalty, Alma imagined it was a lot.  
  
 _‘It sounds stressful,’_ he thought, taking a bite of his food. He wondered how close Kanda was with the prince – probably decently so, if they were both exorcists.  
  
As Alma reflected on this, he promptly remembered about his plans to meet up with Kanda later. If he wanted to be ready by noon, he’d have to get started with his tasks.  
  
Hurriedly, he finished his breakfast and left the dining hall.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda’s sword clashed against Allen’s anti-akuma weapon. His teeth gritted, jaw tight as he pushed back with all his strength. Allen’s weapon was surprisingly his left arm, which had turned into a dark, inky claw that had the strength of iron: a parasitic innocence that existed as a part of his body. It was a type that wasn’t particularly common, with the exorcists in the Ilverian unit all harboring equipment types. Kanda hadn’t thought much of it this, at first– but Allen’s innocence was more than a match than the curved blade of his sword, the Liorean exorcist stronger than he appeared.  
  
Kanda would be damned if he lost to the beansprout.  
  
Mugen illuminated, light sparking from the blade. Allen was steadfast as he pushed forward, but Kanda was quick; he unexpectedly dodged, causing Allen to lose his balance, whirling around before he slashed his blade through the air, several ghostly insects appearing.  
  
Allen turned and blocked, his claws slicing through them before they could attack. However, his focus had shifted, giving Kanda just enough time to act.  
  
Charging forward, Kanda swung his sword – just as Allen sent a blast of energy from his claw, knocking the prince back.  
  
Kanda grunted, his head hitting against the forcefield encompassing the arena.  
  
Allen’s claws retracted, his left arm and hand changing from black to a charred, dark red color. He went over to Kanda, extending a hand to help. “Hey, you okay?”  
  
Kanda looked at Allen’s hand and scoffed as he refused it. He stood up. “Tch. I’m _fine_.”  
  
He didn’t give Allen a chance to say anything else as he stalked out of the arena.  
  
On the sidelines, Daisya snickered as Kanda exited. “Did someone hurt that ego of yours?”  
  
“Shut up,” Kanda grumbled.  
  
Daisya shook his head and grinned at Allen as he exited the arena. “Nice job. Not many people have the balls to beat his ass like that.”  
  
Allen offered a small smile. “It was a close match – either of us could have had it,” he pointed out.  
  
Kanda didn’t bother to listen to their conversation and grabbed one of the small towels shelved on the east wall of the training room. He wiped the beads of sweat from his face, trying to fight the sting to his pride; while Kanda could appreciate a challenge, he _hated_ losing.  
  
Maybe he should have been training more – he didn’t want any slip ups with the examination only two days away.  
  
“If you have any energy left, we should all have a go,” Daisya said, before glancing back at Kanda with an impish grin. “What do you say, Kanda? Let’s have a three-way training session. We haven’t done one of those in a while – and you bailed the last time I suggested it.”  
  
Kanda huffed, ignoring Daisya.  
  
“I may have to take a break for a bit,” Allen said. He smiled sheepishly. “I’m kind of starving after that session.”  
  
Daisya raised an eyebrow. “Didn’t you get food before you came here?”  
  
Allen shrugged. “Yeah, but I burn a lot of energy with my innocence. Parasitic types can really take it out of you,” he pointed out. “Anyways, it’s almost noon-“  
  
Kanda stopped paying attention to anything else as soon as he heard about the time. Glancing at the clock hanging on the wall, he noticed the hands read fifteen minutes till noon. Silently, he cursed as he swiftly left the training room.  
  
Daisya turned, completely perplexed. “Hey, you going somewhere?”  
  
Kanda didn’t answer. He had already exited, his pace brisk. During his spar with Allen, he had neglected to pay attention to the time; he had meant to leave sooner, to ensure that he would have had enough time to get to the stables by noon, but now he’d have to get a move on.  
  
It was odd. Normally, Kanda didn’t care too much about being late; he simply got to places whenever he got there. It wasn’t as though he had to _rush_ , either – he wasn’t going to some stuffy meeting or some ordeal his aunt wanted him at. This was casual. Nothing significant.  
  
But, Kanda thought of Alma. And he didn’t want to make the stable boy wait.  
  
The sensation annoyed Kanda. What was wrong with him? He never had cared much about what anyone else thought before.  
  
 _‘Don’t be stupid.’_  
  
Kanda tried to shake his feelings aside. He needed to stop getting so tangled up in his thoughts. He was already pushing his luck enough as it was. Looking back, he shouldn’t have even offered to take Alma anywhere – what had he been thinking? Kanda had already gotten in trouble for venturing out, even if this time he would only be going into the city.  
  
His jaw tightened. Just this once. Just this _once_ , Kanda would do it – but that would be it. He would pull back after.  
  
Decision made, Kanda rounded the corner-  
  
He stopped abruptly, barely missing Lavi as they came close to colliding. Irritated, Kanda glared. “Watch where you’re going.”  
  
Lavi straightened himself, his bangs having fallen into his face. He brushed them aside, his green eye landing on Kanda. “Be a little nicer, will you? You were the one plowing through.” He looked at Kanda, gaze inquiring. “Just where are you even rushing off to? Are you going to that meeting with your aunt and the duke?”  
  
Kanda was about to snap back, but paused. He scowled. “What meeting?”  
  
“Guess not,” Lavi said. “They’re meeting with Gramps – he told me Legory mentioned the CROWs.”  
  
Arms crossed, Kanda eyed Lavi. He recalled the previous day’s meeting, where it had been decided several of the CROWs would be stationed in Liorea. “Yeah. He said yesterday they’d send some here from Liorea.”  
  
Lavi leaned against the wall, expression having gone strangely blank for a second – something ponderous flickered in his eyes. “I mean, it’s probably a good idea, all things considered. They only recently tried to send some to Othelion,” he explained. “Though, I’m sure you heard about what happened with that.”  
  
Kanda’s frown deepened. “They went missing.”  
  
Lavi nodded. “Yeah. And I mean, those were some pretty skilled CROWs that had been trained,” he mentioned. “From what I know, the Black Order has been intensifying their training so it doesn’t happen again. I think that’s what part of this meeting is about – how they could continue it here if needed.”  
  
Kanda nodded. A thought passed through his mind a beat after and he looked at Lavi. “How long are they meeting for?”  
  
Lavi blinked. He rubbed the back of his head. “Um…not sure. They’re going over a lot, then I think Anita is supposed to show Legory some things for the examination. So probably a few hours.”  
  
“Good.”  
  
Lavi raised an eyebrow. “Why is it good?” he asked, curiosity piqued.  
  
Kanda stilled. He scoffed under his breath, trying to brush the topic off. “Nothing. Just don’t want to see any of them for a while,” he said, hoping the excuse was enough.  
  
Expression a bit wary, Lavi’s gaze never left Kanda. However, he didn’t question it further. “Yeah, dealing with all three of them may be a lot…except your aunt. You really don’t know how lucky you are to have her. She doesn’t throw pencils at you like Gramps does to me.”  
  
Kanda rolled his eyes. “Tch.”  
  
“Well, I guess I’ll get going.” Lavi pushed himself off the wall. “It’s already noon and I was looking for Al-“  
  
 _‘Shit!’  
  
_ Kanda hurried past Lavi. The redhead nearly fell over, but caught himself. “What’s the hurry?” he asked, calling after Kanda.  
  
Kanda didn’t pay any attention to him.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma fumbled with the clasp of his cloak. It was plain metal, slightly discolored from age; the cloak itself was a bit thin, the hems worn and frayed. Alma had considered not wearing it, but the day was cooler than normal. There was a breeze in the air, and although the sun beat down, Alma found the extra fabric to provide some additional level of comfort.  
  
 _‘If it gets too warm while we’re out, I can just take it off,’_ Alma decided.  
  
His thoughts were more a distraction than anything. He stood against the side of the stable, periodically glancing around. It was almost twenty minutes after noon, with Alma’s attention having repeatedly shifted to one of the sundials across from him.  
  
Somewhat anxiously, he continued to fidget with his cloak. _‘Kanda had said to meet here at noon…’_  
  
He took a breath. Kanda was just late and Alma knew he shouldn’t worry about it. Kanda was an exorcist, after all – maybe he had gotten held up by something? It was a perfectly logical explanation.  
  
Despite this, a small part of Alma worried. He didn’t like to give that doubtful part of his heart power, but the unease remained.  
  
Again, Alma inhaled. _‘Stop worrying,’_ he told himself. _‘He’s just a little late. It’s not a big deal. You’re only going to look around the city for a bit. That’s all it is.’_  
  
That was what Alma kept telling himself – that the outing was a simple one, with no significant meaning. They wouldn’t even be out for too long. Alma didn’t want to test his luck with Legory and Kanda would need to return before long as well.  
  
Leaning back against the wall, Alma’s attention returned to the sundial. He’d wait a little longer.  
  
Footsteps beat against the ground as someone ran around the corner of the stable. Alma looked up, his heart skipping a beat as he saw Kanda slow to a stop.  
  
A smile stretched across Alma’s face. “You came!”  
  
Kanda huffed. “I said I would,” he mumbled, pausing before adding an afterthought, “Sorry I’m late.”  
  
“That’s okay!” Alma chirped. “I figured you probably got held up.”  
  
Kanda glanced around the stables. He was dressed in a plain black, sleeveless tunic and trousers, having also grabbed a lightweight cloak. “We should get going,” he said, as he noticed a few other stable hands nearby. He pulled his hood up, not wanting to draw their attention.  
  
Alma nodded, excitement bubbling in his chest. “That sounds good – I probably shouldn’t be gone for too long. But I think it’ll be okay for a little while.”  
  
Kanda paused, recalling his earlier conversation with Lavi. “If you’re worried about the duke, don’t be. He’ll be busy for a few hours with the queen regent.”  
  
Alma looked up, surprised. “Really?”  
  
Kanda averted his gaze. “I heard someone talking about it. Let’s go.”  
  
They started off after that, leaving the stables near where the gatehouse exited into the city. Kanda remained wary; some guards were stationed around it, though they didn’t appear to be paying much attention, distracted in conversation. Kanda didn’t test his luck and avoided looking at them; he had his hood up, so hopefully no one would take notice – no one had the last time he had snuck out.  
  
Fortune was on his side. As he and Alma moved through the gates, a horse-drawn cart came through, some of the guards intercepting the driver to see what he was delivering. Kanda kept walking, his breath held until he and Alma were past the guards.  
  
Once they exited, he released his breath, the sound of the city quickly reaching his ears.  
  
The other side of the gates led into the city. The cobbled streets were wide enough that carriages could move through the main roads with ease, pedestrians keeping to the sides. Storefronts were decorated with ribbons and flowers, anything to spark interest and draw customers in. A few vendors had even set up displays outside in the open air, standing outside as they greeted people.  
  
Alma looked around, momentarily at a loss. The Ilverian city was so busy; at first, he could only stare, completely awestruck. He had glanced around while riding through the city when coming to the castle, but Alma hadn’t really been able to _absorb_ anything.  
  
Noticing how the stable boy was gawking, Kanda pulled him off to the side of the road. “Don’t just stand there – someone will run into you.”  
  
“Ah, sorry.” Alma refocused, though his gaze continued to wander. There were so many people and traffic between the carts and carriages – it was almost a little intimidating. He looked back at Kanda. “Where do you usually like to go when you’re here?”  
  
Kanda floundered. He hadn’t expected such a question and realized that he had looked over one glaring detail when he had so dumbly offered to come with Alma: Kanda never actually spent _time_ in the city. Not unless it was for some stupid, ceremonial show or something.  
  
A bit awkwardly, he tried to think of an answer. “Um. I don’t really spend that much time here,” he admitted.  
  
Alma blinked, confused. However, a look of understanding blossomed in his eyes. “Oh – is it because you’re an exorcist?” he asked. “I know Allen sometimes doesn’t get that much time off back in Liorea and exorcists are usually stationed in specific areas. Is that how it is here?”  
  
Kanda paused. Alma had all but walked into an explanation without Kanda putting in much effort, but it made him feel weird. Alma still thought that Kanda was an _exorcist_ – and while he technically was, he still hadn’t disclosed he was also the prince…  
  
Kanda really had no idea how he would bring it up now. He didn’t even know if he wanted to.  
  
Somewhat uncomfortably, he broke eye contact. “I just don’t have much reason to be out here.”  
  
Despite the strained response, Alma smiled. “That’s alright – we can explore it together,” he said, optimism practically boundless. “It’ll be more fun that way.”  
  
Kanda looked back, immediately meeting the stable boy’s bright blue eyes. He froze the minute their gazes locked, his thoughts drawing to a halt.  
  
Quickly, Kanda tried to snap out of it, tearing his focus away. “Whatever. Let’s just start looking – you’re only here a few days.”  
  
Alma nodded.  
  
They started walking, neither of them speaking. Alma’s usually chatty nature slowly vanished as he was too busy looking around, wide eyed and amazed. He took interest in everything, ranging from the decorative storefronts to the carriages that pulled by. Kanda had to be especially careful when those passed; some undoubtedly belonged to nobles, and he really couldn’t afford to be recognized while out.  
  
Kanda tugged his hood a bit forward. Admittedly, he was a little on edge; he wasn’t as familiar with the city and didn’t exactly like crowds. Too many people stressed him out and it was _loud_.  
  
Alma glanced over. A hint of worry glimmered in his eyes. “Are you okay?”  
  
Kanda turned to Alma suspiciously. “Why are you asking?”  
  
“Um, well…you don’t look that happy.” Alma rubbed his wrist as he averted his gaze. “Are you sure you’re okay with being here? I don’t want you to feel like you have to if you’d rather go back. I could look around on my own.”  
  
Kanda hesitated. Had anyone else given him the option, he likely would have turned back or retreated to somewhere less crowded. However, when Alma spoke, Kanda hadn’t been able to ignore the way his voice turned leaden. Already, he felt like a jerk.  
  
He shook his head. “It’s fine.” Kanda fingered the hood of his cloak. “I just don’t like crowds. They’re annoying.”  
  
Alma wavered. He still looked uncertain and continued to fidget. “If you’re sure.”  
  
Kanda sighed. He could tell that Alma was still worried and the thought of him fretting for the duration of their trip was irritating. “Listen,” he started. “I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t want to. The people are annoying, but I’ll deal with it. Don’t worry about it.”  
  
Alma glanced back. To Kanda’s relief, he offered a small smile. “Okay,” he said. “Sorry – I know it’s probably silly with how much I worry.”  
  
Kanda shrugged. “It’s fine. Just stop apologizing and look at what you want. That’s why we’re here.”  
  
Alma blushed. “Um, alright.”  
  
They stopped by a street corner after walking a block. At the corner, a musician played a lyre as she sang. She was a young, pretty girl with long blonde hair and a striking voice that rivaled that of an angel’s. Several people crowded around her, watching in awe. Alma stopped as well, equally entranced.  
  
Kanda stopped beside Alma, not saying anything. He listened to the song, which was soothing against the noisiness of the crowds. Kanda relaxed slightly, his attention wandering as he skimmed the crowd-  
  
He saw a man.  
  
The man was tall and wore a white cloak, a stark contrast against his dark hair and skin. Glistening amber eyes peered out from his semi-shadowed face, like two embers that burned aflame.  
  
Kanda stilled as he made eye contact with the man. But as soon as he blinked, the stranger was gone.  
  
Kanda frowned. He looked around, not sure where the stranger had disappeared to. Behind him, the music stopped, a small applause erupting from the crowd that had gathered.  
  
Alma turned back to Kanda as he gushed excitably. “What did you think? She was so talented!”  
  
Kanda’s attention was split, still looking for the stranger. However, he turned his attention to Alma, brushing any thoughts of the man aside. “Yeah. She was good.”  
  
“Do you want to go that way next?” Alma asked as he nodded down another street.  
  
Kanda nodded. “Sure.”  
  
As they walked away, Kanda gave the songstress one last glimpse. He noticed she wasn’t alone. A man sat nearby her, wrapped in some shabby fabric with his face bandaged. Beside him, a basket had been laid out to collect funds.  
  
Before leaving, Kanda threw a few silver pieces in.  
  
Alma had paused, waiting for Kanda to catch up. When he did, Alma smiled. “That was nice of you.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. “It wasn’t that much.”  
  
“They’ll appreciate it.” Somewhat playfully, Alma reached over and tugged at Kanda’s hood. “It’d be nice if you’d let them see who you are-“  
  
Kanda’s reflex kicked in, his hand swiftly catching Alma’s wrist. He glared as he turned toward the stable boy, grip firm. “ _Don’t_ ,” he hissed.  
  
The playful light in Alma’s face evaporated, having been snuffed out like a candle. “I’m…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-“ he tried to say, though his speech was stilted. Confusion and regret shadowed his features, his attention turning to his wrist that Kanda still gripped tightly.  
  
Abruptly, Kanda let go and looked away. “Just don’t fucking try to pull it down again.”  
  
Alma chewed his lip. “Okay,” he said, avoiding eye contact. “Sorry, I didn’t think it would matter if you had it down…”  
  
Kanda exhaled. He could hear the unease in Alma’s voice, but he was still agitated about what the stable boy had attempted. At the same time, he didn’t _like_ how Alma sounded either; it bothered him, which sent him into a tedious cycle of feeling terrible over damn near _everything_.  
  
In his peripheral, he saw Alma avert his gaze. Kanda silently cursed to himself.  
  
Exasperated, he pulled Alma aside so that they weren’t too close to the road. They stopped just near a building, where they were a bit out of earshot from everyone else.  
  
Kanda glanced at Alma, then away somewhat rigidly. “I didn’t mean to snap at you,” he said. “I technically shouldn’t be out like this. If anyone sees me, it’s going to be a pain to deal with.”  
  
Alma braved a glance in Kanda’s direction. He still looked remorseful, uncertainty brimming in his eyes; however, he slowly relaxed, as his gaze lingered on Kanda curiously. “Are you worried people will think something’s wrong if they see you’re out? Because you’re an exorcist?”  
  
Kanda wavered. He realized that if he had a moment to tell Alma the truth about who he was, it would be now – he needed to let the stable boy know already. He wasn’t even sure how it had gotten this _far_. Kanda hadn’t thought to say anything at first, but now…  
  
 _‘Come on, you idiot. Fucking say it already,’_ Kanda snapped to himself, frustrated by the way his words seemed to lock up in his chest. Why was it so hard to just _tell_ Alma?  
  
“It’s…sort of like that,” Kanda finally managed. He wanted to kick himself.  
  
Alma nodded. “Allen sometimes has to be careful of that back in Liorea – the exorcists are treated strictly there.” His gaze turned sympathetic, voice softening. “I know that in Liorea, exorcists aren’t even permitted to keep in close contact with their families after being recruited...”  
  
Kanda frowned. Technically, what Alma said was true – exorcists only maintained very distant relations with their relatives after being recruited. It was done for a lot of reasons: to ensure the exorcists could focus, to minimize the trauma if anything went amiss. When Kanda thought about it, he realized that he had never heard Tiedoll or Marie talk about their families. Daisya had mentioned his on occasion, but even then, they were spoken of distantly.  
  
Alma turned toward Kanda. “Is…that how it is here, too?”  
  
Kanda looked back at Alma. He shrugged. “Yeah, pretty much.”  
  
“Do you get to ever see your family at all? You must miss them.”  
  
Kanda paused, momentarily drawing a blank. “They’re not around, anymore,” he said, before he caught sight of Alma’s inquisitive stare. He looked away, chest tight. “My mother died when I was born, so I never knew her. And I lost my father when I was a kid.”  
  
Immediately, Alma’s expression turned regretful. “I’m sorry – I didn’t realize.”  
  
“It’s fine,” Kanda cut off, not wanting Alma to go into another apologizing frenzy. “I have an aunt and she lives in the castle. So, I get to see her.”  
  
Alma’s smile returned, though it was a bit hesitant. “That’s great! You’re so lucky. I’m sure she probably worries about what you do, but at least you have her around.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. The topic was awkward and he glanced around. “We should start walking – you won’t see much if we’re just standing here. It’s going to piss me off if we came out here for nothing.”  
  
Alma blinked, having almost forgotten. His lips quirked up, though, eyes glimmering with a tinge of amusement at Kanda’s phrasing. “Right. We should make the most of it,” he said before turning back to the road they had started. “Let’s see what’s down this way.”  
  
They looked around, Kanda allowing Alma to take the lead. Since he had been the one to want to see the city, Kanda didn’t want to stop him from looking at whatever caught his interest. Sure enough, Alma quickly became engrossed with almost everything he saw; periodically asking Kanda questions when something crossed his mind. Usually, Kanda was able to answer; if he couldn’t, he just shrugged.  
  
To Kanda’s surprise, the experience wasn’t bad. He had suspected he would get tired of being out around so many people, but he didn’t feel as worn. Alma offered enough of a distraction that Kanda didn’t even think about them much; the stable boy just chattered on so freely, his comfort returning despite the awkward start to their outing.  
  
It was actually sort of nice, being out like that.  
  
Gradually, Kanda relaxed. He had initially been on edge, caught up in his own worries about being recognized or something happening. But the longer he was out with Alma, the less he cared; for once, he wasn’t overwhelmed by thoughts of diplomacy or exorcism. He wasn’t overwhelmed by protocols or akuma. He was just…outside. Looking around. With Alma.  
  
Kanda’s gaze wandered. Alma had stopped by a flower shop, though they didn’t go inside. Instead, he looked at the window display and flowerbeds. Daffodils, orchids, carnations – there was a colorful arrangement that smelled delightfully fragrant.  
  
“These are so pretty,” Alma gushed, before he looked back at Kanda. “What do you think?”  
  
Kanda blinked and looked at them. The flowers were pretty, but he had seen plenty before – the castle gardens were full of them. He shrugged. “They’re nice,” he said, though his words were a bit flat.  
  
Alma laughed gently. “So-so then?” he teased.  
  
Kanda’s ears burned as he scowled. “I didn’t say that.”  
  
“No, but your _tone_ did.” Alma’s smile remained, his voice light. “The flowers back at the castle are gorgeous, so you must be used to them. Do you have a favorite?”  
  
Kanda paused. He had never been asked if he had a favorite flower before and wasn’t sure if he had one. It wasn’t as though he had any special connection to them, save for maybe lotuses – they were the royal flower, but the connection went no deeper than that.  
  
“I don’t know,” Kanda finally admitted. “Lotuses, I guess.”  
  
“Those were the ones at the pond, right?” Alma asked. “I keep hoping I’ll get to see them before I leave, but probably not.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. As Alma spoke, his thoughts immediately focused on the fact that Alma only had a few days left in Ilveria. After that, he would leave.  
  
For some reason, the thought left a hollow feeling in Kanda’s chest.  
  
He tried to ignore the sensation as he crossed his arms. “Why does it matter so much to you? Whether you see them or not?”  
  
Alma blinked. He paused as he registered the question, his gaze flickering off to the side. “Ah, well, it’s not like there are any in Liorea. I saw a picture of them once, though, and they were really pretty,” he explained, looking back at Kanda. “They grow through the mud and into the sunlight, don’t they? They just sounded so interesting. And I don’t know when I’d ever get another chance to see them.”  
  
Kanda paused. The explanation was…very straightforward and at the same time profoundly innocent. It was the sort of thing he’d usually roll his eyes at, though he found it strangely difficult to do so. Coming from Alma, it just made sense – for whatever reason that was.  
  
Alma kicked his foot against the cobble stone path as he continued a bit hesitantly. “I just…think it’s also sort of inspiring? That something so pretty can grow from the mud,” he said, offering a smile in Kanda’s direction. “It’s like the lotus is trying to escape, but eventually makes it to some place better, you know?”  
  
Again, Kanda wavered. He wasn’t really sure how to respond to the oddly insightful take on lotus flowers, but Alma’s words gave him pause. The explanation stuck with him in some strange way.  
  
“Yeah,” Kanda finally said. “Yeah, that makes sense…”  
  
Alma turned, glancing back at the flowers once more. His attention landed on a few daffodils, expression turning strangely distant. “Do you ever feel that way? Like you’re...stuck somewhere and can’t get out?”  
  
The question was spoken softly, Alma’s tone having shifted. It caught Kanda off guard and he initially drew a blank. He had never been asked something that felt so personal before.  
  
However, before Kanda could think much longer, the word _yes_ flashed through his mind.  
  
Alma turned as he looked at Kanda apologetically. “Sorry, I’m sort of rambling,” he offered. “You’re just really easy to talk to.”  
  
Kanda flushed as he kept his arms crossed. He averted his gaze. “It’s fine. I don’t care if you ramble.”  
  
Alma smiled. Before he could go on, his attention shifted as he took note of a storefront just nearby. Eyes lighting up, he tugged Kanda’s wrist. “Oh, let’s look over here next!”  
  
Kanda didn’t get a chance to respond. Alma had taken his hand somewhat unexpectedly, and the next thing he knew, he was pulled over to a shop. It wasn’t one Kanda had recalled, the space small and crammed into a narrow building. A few crystalline windchimes hung outside the window and a display had been set up outside where an older man remained.  
  
The old man smiled as he greeted them. “If you’d like to know how much anything is or want to try something, just let me know.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He glanced at the display, though he was careful to make sure his hood didn’t fall back. An array of gems and jewelry pieces were laid out, sparkling in the sunlight. A few textiles and shawls had also been set out as well, the fabric appearing to be some sort of silk – possibly mulberry.  
  
It wasn’t the sort of display Kanda would have really gone for on his own – his jewelry was minimal. He only wore earrings and didn’t care for textiles. However, when he glanced over, he quickly noticed that Alma was all but enamored by the items.  
  
The old man noticed this as well. “See anything you like?”  
  
Alma paused. His attention moved to one piece – a circular charm of pale gold, with a flower inside of it. It was carved out, so that the whole piece wasn’t solid; the center, however, held a tiny, white stone with a pearly sheen.  
  
“That one?” The old man took out the circular charm from its case and held it up so Alma could get a better look. “The center is a moonstone, but the flower is a lotus – a really pretty piece. I can put it on a thin necklace or a bracelet for you if you’d like to try it.”  
  
Again, Alma wavered. “Um…” He looked torn over the offer, but hesitantly nodded. “Okay. A…bracelet would be nice.”  
  
The old man nodded and attached the piece to a thin, matching bracelet chain of pale gold as well. He clasped it so that the piece was centered, the chain connecting to both sides of the charm so it didn’t dangle freely.  
  
“Here,” he said. “Let me see if this fits your wrist.”  
  
Alma extended his hand, allowing the old man to clasp the bracelet onto his wrist. It fit well, loose enough to be comfortable but not so loose that it would slip off.  
  
“How does that feel?”  
  
Alma moved his wrist, the bracelet lightweight. “It feels really nice,” he said, a smile slipping onto his face. He remained reserved as he looked back at the old man curiously. “Um…how much is it…?”  
  
“Mm. For that with the chain, about five gold pieces – but I could lower it to four.”  
  
Alma flinched at the price. “Ah, I probably shouldn’t – I’m sorry,” he said as he removed it. “Thank you, though.”  
  
The old man nodded. “If you change your mind, it’ll be here.”  
  
Alma smiled politely, then turned to leave.  
  
Kanda frowned. He also left without saying a word, catching up to Alma quickly. The stable boy didn’t say anything, though; Kanda may have previously written such behavior as disinterest, but there was a somewhat distant look in Alma’s eyes – one that even appeared to hold a glimpse of disappointment.  
  
Kanda spoke. “Did you want it?”  
  
Alma stopped walking. His gaze flickered to Kanda before he planted his attention downward. “I don’t really need it,” he said as he started walking again. “Do you want to go this way?”  
  
Brow furrowing even more, Kanda’s gaze turned skeptical. Alma had avoided answering the question and Kanda didn’t understand why. “That wasn’t what I asked,” he said. “If you want it, why don’t you just get it?”  
  
Alma turned to Kanda, somewhat taken aback. A bit uncomfortably, he rubbed his arm. “I…well, it was kind of expensive…” he finally answered. “I don’t really have any money, so I probably shouldn’t have even tried it on."  
  
Kanda quieted. He realized all too late how tactless his previous question had been – even more so when he remembered that Alma was a stable boy. But surely Alma still made _some_ kind of income, didn’t he? Kanda hadn’t thought anything of the price the jeweler had listed, but was five gold pieces expensive? He realized he didn’t know.  
  
“Ah, it’s really nothing,” Alma said, when he noticed how quiet things had gone between them. He smiled reassuringly. “Really – it was at least something nice to look at. And it even had a lotus on it, so I guess in a way I can say I got to see one now.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to drag out the topic anymore and figured Alma didn’t want to either; however, Alma’s words _stuck_ with him. Kanda wasn’t sure what it was. He had never really talked to anyone outside of the royal court or advisors regarding finances and anytime it had been brought up, it had felt more abstract.  
  
Alma glanced around. There were still a lot of people out in the area of town they were in, and up ahead it looked like there was a park where several people were out. “Do you want to go to that park?” he asked. “It looks really nice – we could spend some time there before we have to head back.”  
  
Kanda looked over. He wavered, a thought passing through his mind. “You go on ahead,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”  
  
Alma blinked, a bit confused. “Do you need to go somewhere?”  
  
“Just go on,” Kanda urged. “I’ll be there in a minute.”  
  
Alma nodded. “Okay.” He smiled at Kanda, before pointing ahead. “I’ll just hang by that corner before it breaks off into the park – there’s a bench there so I’m going to sit for a bit.”  
  
They split up after that. Alma walked over to the next street corner, taking a seat on the bench. He was able to see the park, which was small but nice; a few families were outside, parents playing with children as their joyful laughter filled the air. The scene was a quaint one and it made Alma smile; it was always nice to see families together like that. _‘Just like…’_  
  
A small stab of pain pierced his chest, a hollow sensation oozing into his gut. Alma recognized the emotion quickly enough, but pushed it aside. He had been having a nice day so far and the outing with Kanda had been going well. He didn’t want to ruin it by thinking about those things.  
  
 _‘Why does it matter?’_  
  
The question posed itself, again causing Alma to stiffen. He gripped at his wrist, rubbing at it as he tried to ignore his own thoughts. _‘Stop it,’_ he told himself. _‘Just…just enjoy it while you’re here. There’s no point in focusing on the negative.’_  
  
He repeated this to himself once. Twice. He closed his eyes and took a breath.  
  
Something brushed against the side of his face – gossamer light and ghostly. It was enough to startle Alma, his eyes opening wide as he turned.  
  
On the corner of the bench was a butterfly.  
  
Alma blinked, somewhat mesmerized. It was a black one, its wings holding the faintest sheen of amethyst in the light. He had never seen such a strange butterfly before – could they have been some sort of species native to Ilveria? Alma wasn’t sure, but he couldn’t stop staring and it was just so _beautiful_.  
  
Unable to break his gaze, he reached out toward it very hesitantly. “Wow, you’re so pretty,” he said. “Kind of unusual, too…”  
  
The butterfly fluttered its wings, abruptly taking flight. Alma nearly winced in surprise, but stilled – just as the butterfly landed on his finger.  
  
“It likes you.”  
  
Alma pulled his hand back, causing the butterfly to flutter away. He turned, looking up as he came face to face with a pair of strange, yellow eyes.  
  
The stranger smiled at Alma. He was maybe a few years older than Alma, with long dark hair that fell into loose waves; it was pulled back, his white clothing a stark contrast against his deeply tanned skin.  
  
Alma realized the butterfly had landed on the stranger’s shoulder. He blinked. “Is it yours?”  
  
Grin widening, the stranger leaned forward, his arms resting on the back of the bench so that he was closer. “In a way,” he said. “It’s a bit picky with who it gravitates to, though. It wouldn’t get that close to just anyone.”  
  
“Oh.” Alma shifted somewhat uncomfortably. The stranger was being polite, but something about the interaction made Alma uneasy – he wasn’t sure what it was. But he didn’t want to be rude and stayed put. Kanda was supposed to be coming soon, anyways.  
  
“Are you from around here?”  
  
Alma turned back to the stranger and shook his head. “No – I’m just visiting from Liorea. I’m supposed to go back in a few days.”  
  
The stranger sighed. “Well, that’s sort of a shame,” he said. He looked at Alma, gaze never once straying. “Do you want to go back?”  
  
Alma stared, not initially understanding. “What?”  
  
“You know, Liorea. Is that a place you want to go back to?” the stranger asked, before his lips tugged into a smirk. “It should be a simple yes or no. It’s not a complicated question.”  
  
Pausing, Alma didn’t say anything. He didn’t understand what the stranger was getting at, but he struggled to answer. It should have been easy; Alma should have said yes, he was looking forward to returning to what was essentially his home. It was where he was from. Where he lived. It was natural to want to go back.  
  
However, when Alma thought about it, his chest tightened. The thought of returning. The thought of going back. He had people like Allen and the horse master, Klaud, who were nice – but his life back in Liorea? Alma should have been grateful. He was lucky to have his job and to be working, but going back…  
  
 _“She left the child alone.”  
  
Alma didn’t say anything. The two officials were talking right in front of him, almost as though he wasn’t there. Never once did they acknowledge him, the child backed up against the wall as though he were desperate to disappear. To evaporate. To cease existing.  
  
He didn’t understand what had happened.  
  
“Take him in – something will need to be done with him,” one of them said. “See what can be done. He’s old enough he can be put to work somewhere – he’ll have a debt to pay off now.”  
  
Alma sucked in a breath, body stiff. But one of the officials took him by the shoulder, and he was forced to go with them.  
  
_Alma exhaled, the memory leaving a dark hole in his chest. For a second, he almost forgot where he was, though he suddenly remembered: he was on a bench and there was a stranger. A stranger with an eerie, black butterfly on his shoulder.  
  
Alma stood up. “Um. I should probably get going,” he said, suddenly itching to get away from the stranger.  
  
The stranger raised his eyebrows, smirk still in place. “Is my company that terrible? Ouch.”  
  
Alma floundered, guilt trickling into his veins. “It’s – no, I didn’t mean that-“  
  
“Hey.”  
  
Alma turned. Kanda had just walked up, though his expression was hard. His attention shifted between Alma and the stranger, gaze narrowed as he eyed the stranger coolly.  
  
Kanda looked back at Alma, ignoring the stranger. “You want to get going?”  
  
The stranger chuckled. “We were just having a conversation, if that’s what you were worried about.”  
  
Kanda glared, eyes flashing. “I didn’t ask _you_ ,” he spoke lowly.  
  
“Yikes. Have I crossed a line?” The stranger placed his chin into the palm of his hand, as he eyed Kanda carefully. “You look awfully familiar…have I seen you somewhere before?”  
  
Kanda tensed. Before another second could pass, he grabbed Alma’s hand. “Come on.”  
  
The stranger’s grin broadened, his yellow eyes gleaming. “See you around.”  
  
Kanda ignored him. He pulled Alma away from the stranger, weaving through people on the street until they were a safe distance away, though Kanda couldn’t quell the internal discord that the stranger had caused. There had just been something about him…  
  
Kanda suddenly remembered he had seen the stranger earlier – when he and Alma had first entered into the city.  
  
Alma looked at Kanda questioningly. “Do you know who that was?”  
  
Kanda stopped. He realized he was still holding Alma’s hand, but let go as they reached the edge of where the park was. “No,” he said, somewhat rigidly. “Was he bothering you?”  
  
Alma blinked. He wavered on responding, his answer given somewhat carefully. “Ah, I don’t think he meant to. He just asked where I was from.”  
  
Kanda looked away. A small part of him wondered if he had overreacted, but something about that stranger just…  
  
He hadn’t liked him. And he hadn’t liked the way he was looking at Alma, either.  
  
A bit curiously, Alma tilted his head to the side. “Were you…worried about me?”  
  
Kanda drew a blank. He looked back at Alma, though he was suddenly unable to speak; they locked gazes, feet cemented in place as they stared at one another. Kanda’s breath hitched.  
  
Quickly, he looked away. “That guy was just being weird. You didn’t look comfortable and I wasn’t sure if he had tried anything.”  
  
A faint blush colored Alma’s cheeks. “He didn’t,” he reassured, voice going a bit quiet. He glanced at Kanda, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Thanks…for worrying about me, though.”  
  
Kanda’s eyes flickered back to Alma and he instantly caught sight of the sweet smile on the stable boy’s face.  
  
Forcing himself out of his daze, he tried to focus. “We’ve already been out for a while. If you want to see anything else, we should do it before we have to go back.”  
  
Alma nodded. “Okay,” he said, smile brightening. Gently, he took Kanda’s hand as he tugged him along. “Let’s do that.”  
  
The touch was light, yet it caused every muscle in Kanda’s body to lock into place. Before when he had taken Alma’s hand, it had been an impulsive action – but having Alma take his hand in such a light way struck a chord within Kanda that he couldn’t describe. He generally didn’t care for physical contact, but this…he didn’t mind it. And it felt nice.  
  
Gradually relaxing, Kanda allowed Alma to pull him along, the thoughts of the stranger drifting from his mind.  
  
Neither of them noticed the black butterfly following them.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The sunlight was warm against Lavi’s face, the rays beating down against him. A slight breeze brushed by pleasantly, offering just enough coolness so that the sun’s heat wasn’t overbearing – something that was welcome, considering the clouds were sparse.  
  
He lifted a hand to shield his one good eye. “Man, it’s bright outside today.”  
  
Allen turned back, lips tugging into an amused smirk. “That’s because you’ve been holed up inside that study so much. You’ve rarely left since I’ve been here.”  
  
Lavi turned back to Allen, mouth agape. They had walked outside the main entrance of the castle moments ago, several guards patrolling near the front gates. A few groundskeepers were out tending to the flowers in the front, but otherwise, the activity was sparse.  
  
“Come on, Al – it’s not a bad thing,” Lavi reiterated. “I like my books – that’s good stuff in there!”

  
“I never said it wasn’t. But even _you_ need a break.” Allen’s eyes gleamed, a hint of mischief in his gaze. “You mentioned Bookman was busy, so now’s the time to do it.”  
  
“You’re going to get me in trouble,” Lavi said, a grin appearing on his face. “Not that I mind _too_ much.”  
  
“Good,” Allen said. “We should go riding – that’d be fun and we could look around the grounds more quickly.”  
  
Lavi’s grin died. A hint of nervousness trickled into his voice. “R-riding? I thought we were going to just walk around.”  
  
Allen stopped walking, as he looked back at Lavi. He raised an eyebrow. “You’ve ridden before, haven’t you?”  
  
Lavi shifted. “I mean…yeah, but I’m not that good. Can’t we just use our own two legs? Being on a horse makes me nervous – those animals can act up!”  
  
“Hey, it’s okay,” Allen reassured as he smiled gently. “Why don’t we compromise and at least try it? Alma’s probably at the stables and he’s really good at handling them. He could show you a thing or two. If it doesn’t work, we’ll walk.”  
  
After a moment of consideration, Lavi nodded. He could manage that. “Alright – but if I get injured, I’m blaming you.”  
  
“Hopefully, that won’t happen.”  
  
They walked to the stables after that, navigating through the wooden buildings until they found where the Liorean horses were kept. Allen glanced around, not seeing anyone in sight. “Huh, I wonder if Alma went somewhere – he’s usually here, but maybe he went into the castle for something.”  
  
Lavi leaned against the corner of the stable building. “Well, walking still sounds like a good idea…”  
  
“Haha, nice try. I’m going to look around in case he’s here.” Allen looked back at Lavi, and smiled impishly. “Don’t try to sneak away while I’m gone.”  
  
Lavi chuckled sheepishly. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”  
  
Allen started off, finding another stable hand not too far away. While he inquired about where Alma might have been, Lavi glanced around. The air smelled thick of hay and horse manure, and he instinctively longed for the nice, snugness of the library study. Though, at least he was out with Allen.  
  
As Lavi waited, he rubbed his chin. Alma. He hadn’t spoken to the stable boy directly, but he knew that he had heard the name somewhere – somewhere other than from Allen. _‘Weird. Where have I heard him mentioned before…?’_ It was a bit frustrating, really – Lavi usually had such a sharp memory. But for whatever reason, he was drawing a blank.  
  
Someone laughed gently from behind the stables, catching Lavi’s attention. Careful not to move too much, he tilted his head back, his ears catching onto the faint conversation.  
  
“I had a lot of fun today,” someone said. “I’m glad we got to go together.”  
  
Lavi blinked. His immediate thought was that he was listening in to the last conversation of someone who may have been on a date, though he could have been mistaken; either way, he was inclined to stop listening right there. However, the next person spoke, causing his thoughts to screech to a halt.  
  
“Yeah…it was nice.”  
  
Lavi blinked, the voice all too familiar as it struck a sharp chord. _‘Wait…’_  
  
“I should probably get going. I was gone a while and I’ll need to check on the horses,” the first person said. “Maybe I’ll see you again if you want to stop by later? Or tomorrow – I know the examination is coming up.”  
  
The second speaker paused and Lavi could practically _feel_ the hesitation. “Um...yeah. Tomorrow.”  
  
The conversation ended quickly and Lavi remained still. Only seconds later did someone walk around the corner, the bookman recognizing him – Alma.  
  
Alma turned, somewhat surprised as he saw Lavi. “Oh! Did you need help with something?” he asked, before recognition also filled his eyes. He smiled. “You’re Lavi, right? Allen’s told me so much about you! We’ve never met in person, but I’m Alma.”  
  
Lavi nodded. “Uh, yeah,” he said. He motioned toward where Allen had gone. “Allen went that way to look for you, actually.”  
  
“He hasn’t been looking for long, has he?” Alma asked, a hint of worry trickling into his voice. “I’ll go get him.”  
  
“Hold on.” Lavi said, stopping Alma. He wavered when the stable boy looked at him. “Um…I gotta check a thing. Tell Allen I’ll be back in five minutes.”  
  
Alma nodded. “Okay.”  
  
As soon as Alma left, Lavi turned. Quickly, he hurried back to around the stables.  
  
When he got back there, he saw no one. Lavi looked around, a frown on his face. _‘Damn, he’s fast,’_ he thought, just before he caught a glimpse of a cloaked figure disappearing around the corner of another stable.  
  
Hurriedly, Lavi rushed to catch up. His long legs worked to his advantage, allowing him to move fast as he rounded the corner. He caught sight of the cloaked figure and before they could disappear, Lavi spoke. “Kanda?”  
  
Stiffening, the figure stopped moving. He turned swiftly and Lavi saw he had been correct – it _was_ Kanda.  
  
Perplexed, Lavi ran up to him. “Kanda, what are you _doing_ back here?”  
  
Kanda scoffed, immediately turning defensive. “We’re in the stables. It’s open to everyone.”  
  
“Yeah, but…” Lavi shook his head, gaze skeptical. “Why are you sneaking around?”  
  
Kanda tensed, gaze flashing. “I’m not _sneaking around_.”  
  
“Um, Kanda? You have your hood up and are going out through the back – that’s _definitely_ sneaking around,” Lavi pointed out. He frowned as he recalled what he had heard earlier. “Seriously, what’s up? You’re acting like you’re hiding something.”  
  
Kanda turned rigid, his expression darkening. “What the hell is that supposed to mean? Just get off my back.”  
  
“Kanda.” Lavi’s tone turned serious, the lightness in his voice dimming. “I heard you saying goodbye to someone – Alma? Was that who you were with? What, are you sneaking around with him because you like him or something?”  
  
As soon as the name was dropped, Kanda’s demeanor shifted. The defensiveness remained, but he looked away, breaking eye contact with the bookman. To Lavi’s surprise, he noticed the faintest hint of a blush on the prince’s face.  
  
Eye widening, Lavi realized that his flippant accusation may have carried more weight than not. “Wait, _do_ you like him? Like, _like him_ , like him?”  
  
Kanda whipped his face back in Lavi’s direction, glaring heatedly. “What the fuck? No!” He balled his fists, now thoroughly agitated. “We just went out into the city and that was all it was!”  
  
“Well, now I’m not so convinced,” Lavi murmured as he shook his head. “Gee, I hope you’re right, though. I mean, Alma’s a stable boy – I’m surprised you two are even talking considering you’re the prince.”  
  
As Lavi said this, Kanda’s mouth clamped shut. He immediately broke eye contact.  
  
Lavi stared. “He…does know you’re the prince, right?”  
  
Kanda didn’t answer.  
  
Lavi’s mouth dropped. “Kanda, are you freaking _serious_?” he exclaimed. “How the heck are you even pulling that off? How has he not _found out_?”  
  
Kanda glowered, teeth gnashing together. “Shut _up_ ,” he hissed. “You’re being too damn loud!”  
  
“Let me be shocked, okay?” Lavi ran a hand through his red locks, completely at a loss. “I just…can’t believe you’d do that. Even if you’re not crushing, why would you keep that from him? That’s the biggest curve ball you’ve ever thrown at me.”  
  
“Tch. Would you calm down? It’s not that big of a deal. I don’t see why it even matters.”  
  
“But it _does_ ,” Lavi pushed. “Look, things are a bit more laid back here in Ilveria, but that’s not how it is in Liorea. And if it wasn’t a ‘big deal’, then you would have told him, wouldn’t you?”  
  
Kanda scowled, arms crossing. He huffed. “I haven’t found a good time, okay?” he finally admitted, words irritable. “He just…thinks I’m an exorcist, and…”  
  
He trailed off. As much as Kanda hated it, he knew Lavi had a point – it _was_ a big deal. Even in Ilveria, it wasn’t like Kanda talked to too many people outside of the castle. He spoke to the other exorcists and some guards, but when Kanda thought about it…did he talk to any of the servants? Not really. Even if Ilveria wasn’t as strict in separating classes like Liorea, there was still some separation.  
  
Kanda just hadn’t wanted to admit that. Not when Alma was involved.  
  
Lavi sighed, the silence stretching between them. “I hate being this kind of person, but…whatever is going on, figure it out soon.” He looked at Kanda, gaze wary. “It won’t be long before he finds out and he’s _going_ to find out. You might as well tell him now before he gets his hopes up. Because from what it sounded like back there, I think he likes you.”  
  
Kanda huffed as he looked away, Lavi’s words seeping into his marrow like acid. _‘Damn it…’_  
  
Lavi glanced back. “I need to get going – or else Al is going to think I bailed on him,” he said, before looking back at Kanda. “Seriously, though. Don’t be leading him on or anything.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything as Lavi turned to leave. He kept still, thoughts churning relentlessly as he reflected on what the bookman had said – on what had happened that day and during his time with Alma…  
  
 _Alma smiled at him sweetly, just before he left to return back to the stables. “I had a lot of fun today,” he said. “I’m glad we got to go together.”  
_  
Kanda inwardly cursed, a sharp stab of pain piercing his heart.  
  
He realized he might have made a mistake after all, and this time, there was no turning back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had meant to post this sooner, but only just now am getting to it. It’s been a crazy week here (being I live in the US), but I wanted to still update since it offers a distraction. I’m hoping it could be helping others distract as well.
> 
> This is also a chapter I really enjoyed writing, and I think it might have been one of my favorites. I wanted to write a chapter that focused on Kanda and Alma really getting to know each other a bit more and bond, and sending them on what was essentially a date seemed to do the trick. Of course, they’re both saying it isn’t a date, but let’s be real - it was a date. Even Lavi could tell it was a date. XD
> 
> I always feel a bit all over the place with my pacing, but I’m hoping the development with Kanda and Alma feels natural. There’s a little more to come, and this of course is leading to some major plot things that are fast approaching. (Yes, we are still in the buildup phase because I am a lover of dragging things out. XD) That being said, I hope it hasn’t felt too slow. ;__;
> 
> As a more general update of where this story is, I just finished chapter 23 tonight (Thursday night - it’s technically Friday now since I’m updating this after midnight) and am using NaNoWriMo to knock out what I can. It looks like this story may actually be 27 chapters rather than 26, but we’ll see!
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. As always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated. <3


	10. A Kiss Goodnight

The day before the examination came quickly. Kanda had been aware of its arrival for what had felt like forever, counting the days down as it loomed over his head. All those days of training and preparation simmered in his memory, with every hour dedicated to ensuring that he would do well.  
  
With one day left, Kanda was beyond nervous.  
  
He didn’t want to admit it, but he was. The whole thought of the examination just put him on _edge_. He knew that he shouldn’t have been worried; he had trained well and was skilled in both exorcism and sword fighting. The only reason his training had been longer than what some exorcists normally went through was because he was royalty; the nobility were always required to train more extensively to ensure that they were truly _ready_ before taking on that secondary role.  
  
Kanda needed to relax. He would be fine, and technically, the other exorcists would be examined again as well. It wouldn’t be as intense for them as it would be for him, but he wouldn’t be the only one.  
  
Still – there was the fact that the examination was a public event in Ilveria. All of the nobility and citizens would flock to watch. That had been the case during the examination two years ago, and considering he was the prince, the ordeal was sure to draw a hefty crowd.  
  
Maybe that was what Kanda dreaded most. He hated crowds. Having all those people watch would only add an additional level of pressure he didn’t want.  
  
He spent nearly the whole afternoon practicing, working hard on the training field. In a way, Kanda was making up for the day before; he had trained with Daisya and the beansprout the previous morning, but then he had spent most of the day with Alma. After that, the evening had been weighed down with stupid, princely responsibilities…  
  
Alma. He still hadn’t told Alma.  
  
Kanda stopped training, Mugen in his grasp. He exhaled, beads of sweat clinging to his back. He hadn’t kept track of how many hours he had been going for, but his muscles were beginning to ache – a sign that he should take a rest soon. He didn’t need to risk straining himself the day before the examination.  
  
He sheathed his sword and glanced around. As he looked, he noticed the sky turning to dusk. The outdoor arena was empty, but the following day it would be packed with people.  
  
 _‘Tomorrow.’_ Tomorrow it would all be over with. And Alma would leave after that.  
  
The thought left a sting in Kanda’s chest and he gripped the hilt of Mugen in frustration. Damn it, why couldn’t he stop _thinking_ about that stable boy…?  
  
 _“From what it sounded like back there, I think he likes you.”_  
  
Kanda wanted to scoff. Of course, Lavi had caught him after his outing and had to jump to conclusions. Yes, he and Alma had spent time together – but they didn’t _like_ each other. Not like that.  
  
Someone approached Kanda from behind. He turned, having noticed the soft footsteps, but relaxed as soon as he saw it was Tiedoll.  
  
Tiedoll stopped as he reached Kanda. “I didn’t see you in the training room – I wondered if you’d be outside.”  
  
Kanda crossed his arms, the sun beating on his skin. “I wanted to get used to being out here.”  
  
“It should be an easier space to move in – the open air is always nicer than being inside.” Tiedoll looked at Kanda, smiling gently. “I hope you at least took some time for yourself yesterday. I was able to get some drawing in during the evening – it certainly helped clear my head a bit.”  
  
The memories from the previous day flashed through Kanda’s mind and he looked away.  
  
“Still nothing?” Kanda asked, careful to change the topic.  
  
Tiedoll sighed, knowing well what the prince was referring to: the possibility of any more akuma sightings. “No. But the duke sent out word about having CROWs sent here – it’ll be interesting to see what comes of that. These last few days have been quiet.”  
  
Kanda nodded, expression pensive. Although some may have viewed the lack of activity as a good thing, he remained wary; there were still too many unknown components and Kanda knew they couldn’t let their guard down entirely.  
  
Tiedoll eyed him for a moment before speaking. “You know, your aunt was looking for you earlier. I think she wanted to speak about whatever happened the other day.”  
  
Kanda stiffened, thoughts drawing to a sudden halt. He sucked in a breath and defiantly avoided eye contact.  
  
The general hummed. “Mm. So, something between you two did happen…”  
  
Kanda grimaced. He uncrossed his arms as he turned back toward Tiedoll, a scowl on his face. Since the meeting two days ago, his relationship with his aunt had become more strained than normal. All yesterday, Kanda had avoided her – he had only seen her at dinner, and due to the duke’s presence, Kanda had hardly spoken a word.  
  
“She keeps deciding shit for me,” Kanda spoke, words short. “She wouldn’t even let me fucking speak for myself when that stupid advisor asked me about _prospects_.”  
  
Tiedoll raised an eyebrow as understanding filled his eyes. “Mm. I had heard that there was a possibility of a courtship going around…I wondered if that was a part of the issue.”  
  
Kanda faltered, the general’s comment striking a chord of unease. Tiedoll had heard about it? Kanda silently cursed. If Tiedoll had already heard, then that likely meant the topic was probably flying around through the castle. Things like that had a nasty way of spreading quickly and it was one more reason Kanda got so easily fed up with being royalty. There was no _privacy._  
  
“Tch. It’s stupid.” Kanda’s words were filled with disgust as he thought back to how casually it had been discussed in front of him the other day. The advisor. The duke. Why did everyone have to be so invested in his business? That sort of thing was personal and he didn’t even _want it_. “The advisors want me to pick someone so I can go back to exorcism.”  
  
The general frowned. “It’s a complicated situation,” Tiedoll acknowledged. “But it’s not one I think you should worry over quite yet. Your aunt is addressing these things as they come up – as they will continue to do so. In a way, she’s trying her best to cover for you. She understands this isn’t something you want to be pressured into.”  
  
Kanda scoffed at the excuse. “Doesn’t seem like it.”  
  
A small sigh escaped Tiedoll. “I know it must be frustrating. Having people poke into your personal affairs is never pleasant.” He turned back to Kanda, expression reassuring. “But for now, perhaps focus on one thing at a time. The examination for tomorrow, and maybe this after.”  
  
Arms crossing once more, Kanda’s scowl deepened. “That’s not helpful,” he grumbled.  
  
“Well, you won’t get very far by stewing.” Tiedoll offered a small smile. “At least talk to her. You know how much she worries.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything, the words slowly sinking in. He was still angry with his aunt, but at the same time, he knew that she meant well. After all, the woman had taken on raising him for the last ten years. She had stepped in when there was no one else to, when Kanda’s father had…  
  
Expression softening, Kanda thought back to that time. Anita had done so much for him.  
  
Gently, Tiedoll placed a hand on Kanda’s shoulder. “I’ll leave you – but think about what I said. It’ll be sundown soon. And it’s never good to let these things go unresolved for long.”  
  
Kanda nodded and Tiedoll left.  
  
Once alone, Kanda looked around one final time. The sun had fallen in the west, the eastern sky turning a hazy shade of pink and orange. He would need to turn in soon; after having practiced so hard, he would have to make sure he got a lot of rest.  
  
He also needed to see Alma.  
  
Kanda sucked in a breath. He had told Alma the day before that he would come by that day, but he had yet to do so. Like how he had been with his aunt, Kanda had avoided the stable boy, the thought of finally telling him who he really was weighing on him more than not. He wasn’t sure why, but he just…  
  
He didn’t want Alma to think any differently of him.  
  
Kanda shook his head. He was being stupid – he was thinking too much. He just needed to set things straight and get it over with. He would have more than enough to deal with after Alma was gone and the stable boy should have been the last of the worries. The examination. The akuma…  
  
Like Tiedoll had said, it was never good to leave things unresolved.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“When the examination is over, I think you should stay.”  
  
Lavi looked up. He had been engrossed in a journal, the words so faded by time that he had needed to look at them through a magnifying glass to make them out. However, Bookman’s words had broken his concentration, his expression turning bewildered as he gazed at the old man. “Huh?”  
  
Bookman looked at Lavi, the candlelight flickering against the walls. “I’ll be returning with the duke, but in the meantime, it would be wise to have you here.”  
  
“How long for?” Lavi asked. While it wouldn’t have been the first time he had been instructed to go elsewhere than Bookman, it wasn’t a route they commonly took. Lavi had been under the impression that they’d both be returning to Liorea. “Do you want me to just keep searching through materials?”  
  
“That, but I think it’d be a good idea to keep an eye on things. Make sure anything unusual is recorded,” Bookman instructed. “I don’t know if Ilveria will be targeted like Othelion, but it shouldn’t be long before the CROWs arrive. Maybe in two or three weeks, depending on how fast that correspondence makes it back to Liorea.”  
  
Lavi frowned, as he crossed his arms. “Right. I mean, I can keep an eye on things.” His gaze wandered toward the journals, the texts stacked onto one another haphazardly. “You know, I’m not sure what I’m going to find here. But I wanted to ask…”  
  
“Hmph. I know what you’re going to ask,” Bookman clipped. He paused, expression thoughtful despite the terseness in which he spoke. “Unfortunately, we’d need more evidence to support that theory before presenting it back to the Order. Otherwise, it could cause unnecessary hysteria.”  
  
Lavi’s brow furrowed. “Yeah, but what else are we going to come up with?” he asked, as he leaned back into his chair. “These akuma attacks seem…sort of precise when you think about it. I know no one in Liorea wants to consider it, but if we wait too long-“  
  
Someone knocked at the study door, cutting Lavi off. Bookman turned, eyebrow raised as the door clicked open.  
  
Allen peeked in, Timcanpy situated on top of his head. He smiled sheepishly. “Ah, sorry, I didn’t realize I was interrupting.”  
  
“We were finished,” Bookman said. He turned back to Lavi. “I’m stepping out – don’t slack off tonight.”  
  
“Sure, sure – I’ll work myself to death. Got it.” Lavi waved his hand flippantly.  
  
Allen stepped out of the way, allowing for Bookman to exit. Once he was gone, Allen walked inside, Timcanpy flying over to Lavi. “You’re not _actually_ supposed to work yourself to death, are you?” he teased. “Sounds like a lackluster way to go.”  
  
“If I could die surrounded by books, I’d be a happy man.”  
  
“Well, I’m getting in the way of your happiness – have you had dinner yet?”  
  
Lavi paused. “No?” He scratched his head. “I think…wait, yeah, I had lunch earlier…”  
  
“Okay, I’m _definitely_ ending your happiness now – we’re getting food.” Allen tugged Lavi’s arm, as he urged him to stand. “Even Bookman can’t expect you to go without dinner.”  
  
Allen’s grip was surprisingly strong, and Lavi almost fell out of his chair. “Easy! I’ll go with you,” he said, smile lopsided. “Probably should get something since I’ll be up all night again.”  
  
“That much left, huh?” Allen looked at Lavi, eyes turning a bit concerned. “Have you guys found anything?”  
  
Lavi paused. He had the impulse to answer, but caught himself just in time, the words locking up in his chest. A fleeting sensation of discomfort befell him as he looked at Allen, the exorcist watching him with a somewhat expectant gaze.  
  
Quickly, Lavi offered a laid-back smile. “Ah, not like we’d hoped,” he said, before his smile faded. “I guess it’ll be okay, though – looks like I’m going to probably be staying here a bit longer.”  
  
Allen looked up, an unnamed emotion dashing across his eyes. “To look into some other things?”  
  
“That, and keep an eye on things while the CROWs get situated. You know.”  
  
Allen nodded, lips pressed together. “Right…”  
  
The air turned quiet, the silence stretching on awkwardly. Shifting a bit, Lavi broke the silence. “We should get going,” he said. “Was Alma coming? You get dinner with him sometimes, don’t you?”  
  
“Yeah, but he mentioned being at the stables a bit later today,” Allen explained. “He didn’t say why, except that he had some extra chores.”  
  
As Allen said this, Lavi’s expression sobered. He immediately thought back to the previous day and of how he had caught Kanda and Alma saying goodbye.  
  
Lavi tried not to worry about it. He had already given Kanda his two cents, though he hadn’t brought it up to Allen. He wasn’t sure if it were even his place.  
  
“Got it,” Lavi said, focusing on the conversation at hand. “Sort of weird. I hadn’t ever talked to Alma before yesterday, but I feel like I’ve heard his name somewhere else…I mean, other than from you. I can’t think of where from though.”  
  
Allen wavered. He looked back at Lavi, mouth formed into a thin line before he looked away.  
  
Lavi noticed this. His green eye flickered with curiosity. “Um, have I? I mean, my memory is pretty sharp, but I guess it isn’t exactly perfect like I’d like to think it is.”  
  
Allen sighed. “It’s not that,” he said, as he shook his head. “I just feel weird talking about it.”  
  
Lavi frowned. “About what?” His curiosity was piqued and he didn’t know if he could drop the topic now. “You can’t just say something like that and leave me hanging.”  
  
Another pause. Allen’s hesitation was palpable and he finally turned back to the door, making sure it was shut. He looked back at Lavi. “This was before I was an exorcist, so it happened while ago. But do you remember hearing about that scullion who worked for the Peck family?”  
  
Lavi blinked. He thought, already remembering the incident Allen was referring to. “Um…I remember hearing about something happening after the fact. I was taken on as an apprentice before then – I was traveling at the time. But, what does that have to do with-“  
  
His words drew to a halt, as he suddenly recalled the details the story – or, perhaps _scandal_ was the better term. It had been such a huge ordeal that the servants back in Liorea had gossiped about it _forever_. And Lavi could understand why – he hadn’t heard a story like that in some time. Especially in a place as strictly run as Liorea.  
  
He also suddenly recalled where he had heard Alma’s name now.  
  
Eye widening, realization dawned on his face. “Oh…”  
  
Allen nodded. “Yeah,” he said, not bothering to go into detail. “It’s been a while, but I think Alma’s still dealing with repercussions from it. He doesn’t like to talk about it really.”  
  
“Ouch.” Lavi rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, that really sucks…”  
  
Allen hummed. “Anyways, we should probably get going,” he said, changing the topic. He smiled at Lavi. “Better get some food if there’s a long night ahead.”  
  
Lavi nodded as Allen started out of the study and followed after him, the books and journals left strewn about the desk.  
  
Silently, he hoped Kanda had worked things out with Alma.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Dusk had taken hold, the sun slowly melting into the horizon. Stars glittered up above like crushed bits of diamonds, the sky dissolving to rich shades of violet and indigo. The air cooled, with the bustling activity of the day drawing to a close as the world turned quiet.  
  
Alma finished up the last of his tasks. He had been in the stables all day, working on whatever he could find to occupy himself. Grooming the horses, cleaning out the stalls, making sure there was enough hay and water – Alma always found something to do.  
  
“There you go.” He finished putting down the last of the water so that the horses would be taken care of for the night. “That should tide you over until morning.”  
  
The horse snorted in response. Alma stroked its muzzle, a small smile on his face. “Don’t worry – you’ll get more hay tomorrow. I’ll even give you a sugar cube, alright?”  
  
He left the last stall, shutting the door before exiting back outside. Since it had started to darken, lanterns had been lit at the stables where anyone remained working. Alma would need to make sure the lanterns in his stable were snuffed out before he turned in; he still hadn’t gotten dinner and had eaten his lunch while working. It would do him some good to sit down.  
  
However, he hesitated. Alma glanced around the stables, seeing a few more grooms out as they finished their tasks – but no sign of Kanda.  
  
Disappointment nipped at Alma. He exhaled, immediately attempting to rationalize with himself. _‘The examination is tomorrow. He probably had to train and get ready for that.’_  
  
Still – Kanda had told Alma he would come, hadn’t he? Alma couldn’t have missed him. He had tried to make sure he was at the stables all day in case he came by, but maybe he had gotten too ahead of himself.  
  
 _‘I guess I am acting sort of pathetic,’_ Alma thought, a small frown tugging at his lips. Was it weird that he had tried to wait for Kanda to come? Maybe, it was – actually, Alma worried that he was becoming a bit obsessed. He had to remember that he still hadn’t known Kanda that long and they had only been together a few times. It wasn’t like…  
  
The thought slipped into his mind and Alma flushed. He shook his head. No – no, that certainly couldn’t have been it.  
  
A small sense of defeat befell him and Alma glanced at the lanterns. He realized he needed to snuff them out.  
  
Grabbing a long, iron snuffer, Alma started to put out the lanterns. _‘I really should turn in anyways…’_  
  
Someone approached Alma from behind – probably Jirou, or one of the other stable hands. Alma partially turned to acknowledge them. “Just one second-“  
  
His breath caught in his throat as soon as he realized it was Kanda.  
  
Taking the snuffer away from the lantern, Alma turned more fully toward Kanda. For whatever reason, speaking was suddenly impossible; all day Alma anticipated talking to Kanda, but now that he was in front of him he couldn’t say a word. Everything just stopped working, his mind going completely _blank_.  
  
Kanda looked just as uncomfortable. He crossed his arms, avoidant of Alma’s gaze. “Um. I didn’t know if you’d still be out here,” he mumbled lamely.  
  
Alma held the snuffer tightly. “I was just finishing up for the day.” A bit hesitantly, he looked at Kanda. “I wasn’t sure if you’d be stopping by.”  
  
The tiniest flinch rippled through Kanda, guilt ghosting across his skin. He uncrossed his arms. “I had to train to make up for yesterday.”  
  
“Oh – right.”  
  
An awkward pause stretched between them. Alma swore he actually heard crickets chirping somewhere, the silence wearing on him; why was it so hard to talk? The previous day in the city, Alma had been able to chatter along with ease. But now, he felt wary. Self-conscious and hesitant.  
  
Doubt clutching at his heart, he had the sudden impulsion to leave.  
  
Alma glanced down. “Um. You probably have to get a lot of rest, don’t you?” he asked, the words sounding strained in his own ears. “I…I really don’t want to keep you from that.”  
  
Kanda looked back at Alma, a frown on his face. “You’re not.” His gaze turned a bit scrutinous, as he eyed Alma warily. “Do you want me to go?”  
  
Alarm pooled in Alma’s chest. He looked up with wide eyes. “No!” He tried to collect himself quickly, as he averted his gaze. “I mean – I really don’t mind. I just didn’t want you to feel badly if it was too much trouble.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. “If it was too much trouble, I wouldn’t have come. Stop worrying.”  
  
Alma bit his lip and nodded. He took a small breath as he tried not to overthink anything.  
  
Kanda glanced around, noticing how quiet the stables had gone. “Were you working out here all day?”  
  
Alma nodded. “Yeah – I had a lot to do, and that way I sort of made up for being gone so long yesterday.” He offered a small smile. “Allen came by at one point, so I got to see him.”  
  
Kanda turned. For a fleeting second, a part of him worried that Alma may have said something about their outing to the beansprout. Considering that Lavi knew, Kanda was already on edge enough about that. “Did you say anything about yesterday?”  
  
Alma paused, somewhat confused. However, he quickly caught on and shook his head. “Um, no – I didn’t say anything to Allen about us going out.” His expression turned thoughtful. “You said you weren’t supposed to be out and I didn’t want you to get in trouble.”  
  
Kanda breathed a sigh of relief. Well, at least the beansprout didn’t know.  
  
Alma eyed Kanda somewhat warily. “Did you…think I’d say something?”  
  
Sharply, Kanda looked back at Alma. He caught the faintest hint of disappointment in the stable boy’s eyes and stiffened. “No, it’s-“ He cut off, shaking his head. “Don’t even think about it. The last few days have just been tense with everything going on.”  
  
Blinking, Alma placed the snuffer against the edge of the stable wall. “What do you mean?”  
  
“It’s nothing,” Kanda said, his tone a bit snappish. “Just forget it.”  
  
A small frown tugged at Alma’s lips. “But-“  
  
“I said _forget it_.”  
  
Alma’s mouth clamped shut. The response had been harsh, and for a moment he wasn’t sure how to respond.  
  
Taking a breath, Alma picked the snuffer back up. “You don’t have to be so mean. I only asked because I was worried,” he mumbled.  
  
As soon as he heard the shift in Alma’s voice, Kanda looked back somewhat penitently. Alma had already turned away though, moving toward the back stalls where a few lanterns remained.  
  
Kanda sighed. “I didn’t mean it like that.”  
  
Alma stopped. He turned back around, his expression slightly dubious.  
  
Kanda paused. He didn’t know how, but every time he _looked_ at Alma he stopped thinking. Or at least, stopped thinking clearly. It didn’t help that the stable boy looked so annoyingly bothered, either.  
  
Kanda forced himself to continue. “I’m just dealing with some shit, okay? It’s stressing me out,” he said, before looking away somewhat abashedly. “I didn’t mean to snap at you. So, don’t take it personally or anything.”  
  
Alma’s gaze lingered on Kanda for a moment. Quietly, he walked back over to where Kanda was before tugging him along by the hand.  
  
“Here,” he said, as he pulled Kanda over to where a few tightly roped, bundles of hay were inside of the stables. “Sit down with me.”  
  
Kanda frowned. He didn’t think hay would be comfortable to sit on, and he visibly hesitated. However, Alma had already plopped down and Kanda felt an annoying tinge of pressure to follow the stable boy’s lead.  
  
He did so and grimaced as some of the hay pricked his hands. “This shit isn’t comfortable.”  
  
Alma laughed. “You’ve never sat on hay before? It’s not _that_ bad,” he pointed out. “It’s definitely nicer than straw. I’ve had to sleep on that before and it’s not exactly my favorite.”  
  
Kanda’s nose scrunched up. “Why? Don’t they give you beds in Liorea?”  
  
Alma shrugged. “I mean, yeah. The cot in my room back there is nicer than what I used to have.”  
  
He trailed off, Kanda watching Alma thoughtfully. Somewhat suddenly, he realized that he didn’t actually know that much _about_ Alma – only that he was a stable boy from Liorea. He liked flowers. And he wasn’t very comfortable around those who had a higher social ranking than him…  
  
Alma leaned forward as he looked at Kanda a bit curiously. “So, it’s been really stressful here lately?” He was gentle in how he approached the topic, his eyes holding a tinge of sympathy. “I can’t really relate to being an exorcist...but it does seem like a lot of pressure.”  
  
Kanda exhaled heavily. It was definitely more than exorcism weighing on him, but he wasn’t even sure how to breach that topic. He wasn’t good with opening up to begin with either. “It’s not just that,” he grumbled. “Everyone here just…expects shit from me. I swear I can’t fucking breathe in this place sometimes.”  
  
He paused, not even sure what to say next. Kanda was actually a bit surprised that he was saying as much as he was, but for whatever reason, talking to Alma was…frighteningly easy. Easier than it had ever been to talk to anyone else. “It’s stupid. I feel like I don’t get a say in anything with how my life goes and it pisses me off.”  
  
Alma remained quiet. He watched Kanda, gaze soft as something akin to understanding flittered across his face – something that was followed by a wash of pain.  
  
Alma looked down. “I…actually sort of understand that. I mean, it’s not the same situation,” he said, words soft. “I’ve never really had any control in my life. It’s hard when you feel trapped like that.”  
  
 _Trapped_. The word lingered in Kanda’s mind; it was surprisingly accurate to how he felt actually, and for the first time, he felt as though someone were truly listening to him. It was a strange sensation, but offered him more comfort than he had felt in a long time.  
  
Alma looked back at Kanda. “I’m really sorry that you’re dealing with this,” he offered. “I wish there was something I could do to help.”  
  
Kanda turned back to Alma, somewhat taken aback. The stable boy’s offer had been so sweet and sincere – Kanda wasn’t even sure how to take it. His cheeks suddenly felt warm though and he looked away abruptly.  
  
“It’s fine,” he barely managed, heartbeat having sped up unexpectedly. Desperate to kill the sensation, Kanda changed the topic. “Have you always worked for the duke? Seems like it’d be a pain in the ass to work for him.”  
  
Alma wavered, caught off guard by the question. He shifted uneasily as he brushed his bangs aside. “Um. Well, I’ve only been working in the stables for about three years,” he answered. After a delay, he continued. “I was a scullion before that, but I didn’t work at the duke’s estate. I worked in the castle.”  
  
Kanda frowned. He hadn’t missed the discomfort in Alma’s voice. “You don’t sound like you like it that much.”  
  
Alma turned back to Kanda, a bit startled. “What? Ah, I mean, I enjoy what I do now,” he said, glancing at Kanda. He managed a small smile. “Klaud was the one who was able to get me work at the stables – she’s the horse master there. I definitely prefer it to working as a scullion and the horses are so fun to work with.”  
  
He looked down again, expression a bit distant. “I got really lucky. If it wasn’t for Klaud, I wouldn’t have gotten work anywhere else.”  
  
“Why?”  
  
Alma blinked, gaze questioning as he looked at Kanda. “Huh?”  
  
Kanda frowned pensively. “Why wouldn’t you have gotten work anywhere else?” he asked. “If you didn’t like being a scullion, you could have left and found another job.”  
  
Immediately, Alma averted his gaze. He gripped his wrist anxiously, his focus lingering on his own two feet. “It’s complicated,” he finally managed, words quiet. “I just…couldn’t. I’m not in a position to find work anywhere else and no one else would hire me.”  
  
The response was vague, and Kanda felt a bit annoyed. “Tch. That doesn’t make any sense. Someone would probably hire you and it’s not like you’re bound to your job.”  
  
Alma kept quiet. He didn’t look back at Kanda, his grip on his wrist tightening.  
  
Softly, he inhaled. “Yes, I am…”  
  
Kanda blinked, the response throwing him for a loop. _‘What? ’_ he wondered, not initially understanding. However, he recalled Alma’s earlier comments about feeling trapped and suddenly wondered if this was why.  
  
Alma chanced a glance at Kanda. However, he couldn’t manage for long, and tore his gaze away. “I have…this debt. But I don’t have any money so I’m working it off,” he said. “I can’t leave until it’s paid.”  
  
The explanation wasn’t one that Kanda had expected – in fact, he wasn’t even sure _what_ he had expected. But regardless, Alma’s answer surprised him; Kanda hadn’t taken Alma for someone to have ever borrowed money and couldn’t even imagine what it might have been for.  
  
Before he could think, the question slipped off his tongue. “How’d you get into it? If it was going to be such much trouble to pay back.”  
  
He regretted his question as soon as he saw Alma’s reaction – something that crossed between shame and embarrassment. Alma chewed the inside of his cheek as he glanced off to the side. “It wasn’t mine. It was my mother’s. She’s not around anymore, so I have to make up for it.”  
  
 _‘Oh.’_  
  
Kanda was at a loss for how to respond. However, he vaguely recalled hearing about this sort of situation – hadn’t it been brought up before with the advisors?  
  
Before he could say anything, Alma took a breath. It was somewhat shaky, a tremor of anxiousness trickling into his voice. “My mother got work as a scullion for the duke’s family at their estate. I was really young then, but I got sick easily as a kid and she couldn’t afford for me to get treated by a doctor. Working as a servant for a noble family paid a little more than selling flowers - that’s what she did before,” he went on, his words turning more cautious with each breath. He never once dared to looked Kanda in the eye.  
  
“Eventually, my health got worse and she panicked. So, she…took some things like jewels and sold them for money. She didn’t realize how valuable they were and the man who bought them didn’t give her the full amount. I was able to get treated, but when she got caught she couldn’t pay anything back…” Alma said, words growing quieter with each passing second. “Because of her reason for doing it, she didn’t get locked up – but she had to pay back all she had stolen and work it off as a debt. After she went missing, I had to take it on. But no one really thinks that highly of me because of it.”  
  
Kanda stared. When Alma had first started to explain what happened, he hadn’t anticipated the gravity of what Alma would disclose, but he was honestly _shocked_. An immediate impulse to get up and leave overtook him; Kanda had never understood thievery, and was frustrated. Why hadn’t Alma’s mother gotten help for him another way? Why had she done what she did? He turned back to Alma, ready to ask. There had to have been another way than breaking the _law_ -  
  
His throat dried, as he made direct eye contact. Alma had turned to him, carefully gauging his reaction. Too swiftly, he had caught Kanda’s initial expression – the scowl, the judgment. Immediately, Alma shut down.  
  
Alma broke eye contact. He stood up. “I should finish up with work.”  
  
Kanda blinked, somewhat dumbfounded. He quickly stood, frown returning. “I didn’t say anything-“  
  
“You didn’t have to.” Alma barely managed to keep his tone even, as he walked back to where the snuffer was. “It was stupid – I don’t know why I even said that.”  
  
“ _Alma_ -“ Kanda caught Alma’s wrist, stopping him. The stable boy turned rigid, having barely turned his face; Kanda could see just a hint of Alma’s gaze though, uneasy and tense.  
  
Kanda kept his grasp on Alma, firm but cautious. “I didn’t _say anything_ ,” he repeated. “You’re jumping to fucking conclusions-“  
  
Alma turned around a bit sharply, as he tugged his hand from Kanda’s grasp. He crossed his arms. “Am I? Because you looked pretty put off just now.”  
  
Kanda’s ears grew hot and he scowled. “Yeah, because it’s a shitty situation,” he pointed out.  
  
He paused before continuing. Even in the heat of the moment, Kanda felt the speedy escalation of their conversation; faintly, some small part of his brain urged him to calm down. It urged him to calm down for _Alma_.  
  
Kanda exhaled, as he tried to speak evenly. “I don’t agree with stealing, but it’s not like your mother had that many options,” he said. “I just…think it’s messed up you’re the one having to deal with it now. You shouldn’t have to pay back what you didn’t take, and you shouldn’t have to live with that crap.”  
  
As he spoke, Alma’s expression shifted. He had closed up somewhat defensively, though he now appeared to be calming down a bit. His expression was somewhat abashed as he looked away, cheeks pink from embarrassment.  
  
Uncrossing his arms, Alma kept his gaze downcast. “Sorry, I…didn’t mean to get defensive like that. I just…” He sighed, his voice becoming nearly inaudible. “I was worried that you wouldn’t want to talk to me anymore. Most people in Liorea think I’m just going to steal like my mother did and I...thought you’d think that.”  
  
Kanda’s chest tightened. Despite how quietly Alma had spoken, he hadn’t missed the painful tremor in his voice; listening to Alma’s words had felt like a hand reaching into his chest and gripping his heart: painful and constricting. He just hated it when Alma was upset. And he hated that Alma had to live like this. It was just…unfair. Terribly, cruelly unfair.  
  
Remembering something, Kanda reached into his pocket. “Hey.”  
  
Alma looked up, somewhat perplexed. His confusion festered as he watched Kanda take out a small, velvet pouch before he handed it over.  
  
Kanda swiftly broke eye contact as Alma looked inside. “You seemed like you wanted it, so I got it before we left yesterday.”  
  
Alma’s eyes widened. He emptied the pouch onto his hand, the lotus charm bracelet there, the golden chain glinting in the soft lighting of the lanterns. “Kanda,” Alma started as he looked back at him. He was at a complete loss. “Are – are you sure? This was so _expensive_.”  
  
Kanda flushed. He stubbornly avoided eye contact. “I had enough money, so don’t worry about it,” he mumbled. “Anyways, I wanted to get it for you. Before you left. This way you’ll have a lotus…since you like them so much.”  
  
Alma’s heart skipped, his cheeks also turning rosy. “If you’re sure.” He managed a small smile, gaze softening. “Thank you – I really don’t even know what to say. I’ve never been given a gift like this before.”  
  
Kanda shrugged. His attention shifted to Alma’s wrist. “Do you need help putting it on?”  
  
Alma’s blush deepened. He looked down, fumbling with the bracelet. “Um, I think I can get it-“ The clasp slipped between his fingers as he tried to secure the bracelet around his right wrist.  
  
“Here.” Kanda reached over, taking Alma’s hand. Carefully, he secured the bracelet, clasping it so that it wouldn’t come undone.  
  
Kanda paused. He had secured the bracelet, but Alma’s hand was in his – somewhat rough from years of physical labor, yet strangely delicate all the same. Gingerly, he ran his fingertips over Alma’s, the thought of letting go suddenly unbearable.  
  
“Um.” Kanda wavered, trying desperately to ground himself. “It’s…getting late. I should probably be going back soon.”  
  
Alma nodded, biting his lip. His focus flickered downward, his hand still in Kanda’s. “Yeah – yeah, you’re going to have a busy day tomorrow.” He swallowed, as his gaze rose to meet Kanda’s. “I probably will have to stay here during the examination, but…good luck. I’ll be rooting for you.”  
  
Their gazes locked, Kanda falling breathless. He was unable to look away, too entranced by Alma’s sky blue eyes, the warm glow of the stable lanterns spilling onto his face. Tenderly, he brought his hand up, his fingers caressing Alma’s cheek. God, Alma looked so _beautiful_ …  
  
Very hesitantly, Alma reached up with his other hand as he brought it over Kanda’s. There was a slight tremble in his grip, a hint of nervousness fluttering in the stable boy’s touch.  
  
Eyes half-lidded, Kanda was unable to keep himself from leaning forward.  
  
Their lips brushed against one another, the kiss gossamer light and gentle. Alma sighed, body relaxing as he leaned in, his hand moving up onto Kanda’s shoulder. The kiss was slow, both of them tentative in their motions; Kanda was especially careful as he wrapped his hand around Alma’s waist, his touch tracing along the slight curve of Alma’s torso.  
  
Kissing Alma felt like a dream.  
  
He finally broke away, taking a breath. They still held onto one another, Kanda’s heart racing in his chest.  
  
Alma. He had just _kissed Alma-_  
  
Shocked by his own actions, Kanda tried to think of what to say. “I should really get going now.”  
  
Alma’s cheeks remained flushed. He nodded again, appearing equally as taken aback. “Ah…yeah. I need to finish up things here too,” he said, hands still gingerly clasping at Kanda’s shoulders. A bit hesitant, he sought Kanda’s gaze. “Um. Will I see you tomorrow? Maybe, after the examination?”  
  
Kanda paused. After the examination, there would be some formalities he would have to go through – but he would have a window of time right after the performance test. A bit dumbly, he nodded. “Yeah – I’ll come by here and find you.”  
  
Alma smiled. He traced his hand down Kanda’s arm, their hands brushing against one another. Gently, Alma squeezed it. “Okay.”  
  
Kanda blushed. He lingered, allowing himself to hold Alma’s hand for just a second longer.  
  
Quickly, Kanda forced himself to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want my award for getting a kiss in this early - everyone probably knows I take forever with slowburns, so this is a bloody miracle for me. XD 
> 
> Of course, that means there’s going to be some extra intense angst and pain to come. I’m currently finishing up 27 and will only have the epilogue for 28, so what does that mean? 18 more chapters where damn near anything can and will happen, and believe me, there _is_ more drama on the way.
> 
> Originally, this chapter was much longer - but I actually split it in half, with the next half being what will now be chapter 11. This definitely felt long enough on its own though, and after dropping some hints about Alma’s backstory it felt like it was really time to shed some light on that. I definitely went back and forth a lot with editing and revising parts of it, and honestly, it’s probably too complex to get into (like I have this whole backstory on Alma’s mother and what happened to her, but really that’s more for my own worldbuilding purposes and who knows if anyone else is interested XD).
> 
> Meanwhile, Kanda is definitely in over his head. I can’t really blame him, though - having romantic feelings is definitely foreign territory, and does anyone honestly think clearly the first time they fall for someone? I’m hoping he still seems in character enough that it doesn’t feel too out of place. He just sort of keeps accidentally digging himself into a deeper hole, but mmm more on that will come to light next chapter. >:3
> 
> I really hope you all enjoyed this chapter! Hopefully the next update will be soon. As always, comments and kudos are deeply appreciated. <3


	11. The Exorcist Examination

The next morning was busy. Preparations had been made well in advance for the exorcist examination, but even that couldn’t stop the last-minute scrambling that many of the castle servants underwent with making sure everything was in place. The examination itself would take place outside on the south field at noon; since it would be an open event to the public, extra care was taken to make sure that the whole ordeal would flow smoothly.  
  
Anita tried to keep track of the time. She had gotten up early to make sure everything was going as it should, and while the servants were certainly busy, they thankfully seemed to have everything in order. It brought Anita relief; while she was used to managing large scale events, there was still a twinge of nervousness she always felt that something could go wrong. Hopefully, that wouldn’t be the case today.  
  
She glanced at the large clock just outside the grand hall, the hands reading an hour to noon.  
  
Mahoja approached her, having just arrived. “They’ve opened the gates for the spectators – the seats have already filled up. Almost all of the nobility in the kingdom came as well.”  
  
“Already?” Anita was unable to keep the surprise from her voice, though it made sense. There had been a large turnout at the last examination two years ago. Since Kanda would be involved with this one, it made sense that attendance would increase. The involvement of royalty was sure to garner an audience.  
  
“It’s moving smoothly – the ushers aren’t having any issues as far as I know.”  
  
Anita nodded, relieved. “I’m glad – Legory and I will be leaving together soon, but I had hoped to find Yuu before. I haven’t seen him all morning.”  
  
Mahoja thought. “I just saw him an hour ago – he was doing some last-minute prep in the training room. I think he and the other exorcists were going to head out to the field soon.”  
  
“I see.” Anita paused, somewhat thoughtfully. “I’ll see if Legory would be willing to go a bit earlier – I don’t want to be rude and not accompany him, but I wouldn’t feel right not speaking to Yuu before.” Her expression turned somewhat concerned as she recalled how their relationship had become somewhat strained lately. “He didn’t come to dinner last night and we haven’t spoken much the past few days.”  
  
Mahoja frowned. “That’s not like him. He usually at least comes for that.”  
  
“No, but he may have been training – Tiedoll mentioned yesterday Yuu was out for a while.” Anita exhaled gently. “It’s been a bit of a difficult time.”  
  
Mahoja’s gaze turned soft, gaze sympathetic. “Don’t worry – we’ll find him before the examination starts.”  
  
The reassurance was kind, and Anita smiled. “Thank you, Mahoja,” she said. “I hope we do.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma hadn’t anticipated so many people to arrive for the examination.  
  
He was surprised. He had heard that Ilveria treated it as an open event to the public, but Alma hadn’t realized just how many people would attend; even being at the stables, he was periodically able to catch sight of the people trickling in through the gates. Some even arrived in carriages or by horseback – nobles, mostly. Then some of the working class came as well.  
  
Alma worked, helping to get any of the visitors’ horses situated. While the carriages were handled separately by the footmen, any individual horses were housed in guest stalls.  
  
Taking the reins of one horse, Alma led it into the stall, locking the gate. A tag was placed on the outside to identify whose horse it was, Alma securing it carefully.  
  
 _‘I can’t believe how busy it is,’_ Alma thought, as he exited back outside. It was getting close to noon and the traffic at the gates had started to die down. By this point, most people were likely already situated in the training field where the examination would take place. _‘Kanda must be nervous with all these people. He said he didn’t like crowds.’_  
  
As he thought about the exorcist, his heart skipped a beat. Immediately, Alma thought back to the previous night, his skin turning warm at the memory.  
  
The kiss. The kiss that he and Kanda had shared.  
  
The mere thought sent a wave of giddiness throughout Alma, nervous excitement bubbling in his chest. He had never kissed anyone before – and before yesterday, Alma hadn’t even been sure if it would ever have happened, let alone with Kanda. Romance wasn’t something Alma was experienced in by any means; he had overheard conversations about it, but never thought anyone would ever show that sort of interest in him.  
  
Gingerly, Alma rubbed his wrist, his fingers tracing over the bracelet. He still was somewhat stunned by the whole ordeal and a part of him felt as though he were dreaming. His thoughts quickly turned wistful, his desire to be with Kanda festering. _‘I want to see him again…’  
  
_ “Alma,” Jirou called, as he walked over to where Alma was. The horse master glanced around, his gaze shifting toward the stable exit and near the gates. “I think it’s calming down now – thanks for helping. I know you’re not technically a part of the staff here.”  
  
Alma smiled. “It’s no problem! I don’t mind at all – everyone looked really swamped, so I’m glad I was able to help.”  
  
“It’s definitely appreciated,” Jirou said. “I let the other grooms know that if they want, they can watch some of the examination – they just have to make sure to be back a half hour before it ends. You should go, too. I’ve noticed you work really hard all the time.”  
  
Alma wavered. Earlier, Allen had attempted to persuade him to come as well, though he had declined. Alma had been too wary of going, having worried that he’d accidentally run into Legory. However, when he thought about how many people had showed up and how crowded it would be…maybe it wouldn’t be as likely the duke would see him.  
  
Still a bit hesitant, Alma smiled and nodded. “Yeah – I may try to go.”  
  
Jirou nodded approvingly. “Well, make sure to go soon, then – things will be getting ready to start up, and I’m not sure what order the exorcists are going in. Pretty sure Prince Yuu will be last.”  
  
That caught Alma’s attention. He wasn’t really interested in watching the prince, but he _was_ interested in seeing Kanda – he hoped that Kanda wasn’t going first.  
  
“Thanks,” Alma said. “I’ll keep that in mind.”  
  
Jirou nodded a final time and let Alma be.  
  
Alma leaned against the corner of the stable, expression ponderous. His heartbeat sped up somewhat anxiously as he thought about going – would he be able to find Allen? Maybe he should have just agreed earlier, rather than waiting until the last minute to change his mind. Alma wasn’t sure where exactly he’d watch from, but someone would be able to point him in the right direction, wouldn’t they?  
  
His stomach churned nervously as he fiddled with the bracelet. _‘It’ll be fine,’_ he told himself. _‘You should go – it’s an open event here. And you should go for Kanda.’_  
  
Slowly, Alma took a breath. If he went, he wasn’t doing anything wrong – he had to remember that. Legory would be with the queen regent and wouldn’t even notice him being there. With how packed it would be, Alma would hopefully blend into the crowd. No one would pay him any mind.  
  
Besides – Alma wanted to go. He wanted to support Kanda. _‘Maybe I could surprise him,’_ he thought, smiling at the idea. He doubted that Kanda would be able to pick him out in the crowd, but the idea was a fun one.  
  
Alma nodded to himself. His decision made, he glanced back to check the stalls one last time, making sure everything was in order before taking off to the training field.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda swore he was going to be sick.  
  
He didn’t get nervous often, but the examination was another story. Leading up to it, Kanda had been aware that the whole fiasco would cause him some stress; there was a lot of pressure to perform well and meet the standards of both an exorcist and the heir to the throne. But even knowing it was coming, he hadn’t been able to prepare for the damned _anxiety_ he was now dealing with.  
  
Silently, Kanda counted. He hadn’t gone out onto the training field yet, having remained behind the platform where his aunt would be with the duke. A tent had been set up behind it, allowing the exorcists a place of refuge while the spectators were situated, the terraced seating encompassing the rest of the field in a U-shape. If anything, Kanda was offered some solace by the privacy – but it wasn’t enough when he could hear the hum of the crowd.  
  
Tiedoll approached Kanda from behind. “Don’t be nervous,” he said. “Any other time, these practices wouldn’t be strenuous for you – you’ll be fine.”  
  
Kanda frowned, as he crossed his arms. He huffed. “I just want it done,” he grumbled. “Why the hell is it even public?”  
  
“Because it gives everyone a chance in the kingdom to be a little more involved.” Tiedoll smiled, a twinkle in his eyes. “The people want to support their prince – you should feel good about that.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. The notion made him feel anything _but_ good.  
  
Toward the exit, Daisya peeked out of the tent. He pulled back after a second, the canvas falling back into place. He stepped back. “Looks like Queen Anita is coming over.”  
  
Kanda looked up. As he did, the canvas was pulled aside once more as Anita and Mahoja entered.  
  
Tiedoll smiled. “We weren’t expecting you – I’d have thought you’d have been with the duke.”  
  
“Bookman is with him now – they’re already settled in.” Anita smiled kindly. “I wanted to come to wish everyone luck. Though I know you’ll all do well.”  
  
“It’s always appreciated,” Tiedoll said.  
  
Anita’s gaze shifted, her focus landing on Kanda. “Yuu, could I speak with you for a moment?”  
  
Kanda wavered. He nodded, albeit somewhat warily.  
  
They walked over to the other end of the tent, away from everyone else. Kanda kept quiet, not sure what his aunt wanted to talk to him about. He hadn’t really seen her the day before, he realized, and wondered if that had anything to do with it.  
  
Anita looked at Kanda, keeping her voice soft so as to keep the others in the tent from hearing. “I know things have been a bit tense these last few weeks. I realize I probably haven’t helped with the pressure you’ve been under.”  
  
Surprise flickered in Kanda’s eyes. Already, the conversation was going in a direction he hadn’t anticipated, but he kept his mouth shut.  
  
Anita continued. “I know you’ll do well today,” she said, before smiling gently. “Izo would be proud.”  
  
The compliment was spoken with warmth and Kanda immediately floundered. It was one thing to be reassured that he would do alright during the examination, but another thing entirely to be told his father would be proud – especially with the trouble he had gotten into only a few days ago. Kanda had been certain he was nothing but a disappointment in his aunt’s eyes.  
  
Kanda attempted to respond and shifted awkwardly. “Thanks,” he mumbled, not sure what else to say.  
  
“I’ll let you and the others get ready now,” Anita said. “Good luck.”  
  
Kanda nodded, as his aunt walked back to where the others were. He watched as she exchanged a few more words with Tiedoll before exiting the tent with Mahoja.  
  
Kanda kept to himself, not bothering to talk to anyone after that. He knew that any minute now, the examination would start; he just needed to focus and the whole thing would be over with soon enough.  
  
It would be over and then he could go see Alma.  
  
Kanda’s chest tightened at the thought of the stable boy. Alma. Alma had said he wouldn’t be able to watch the examination, but that was honestly a relief. The previous night hadn’t gone as he had planned for it to _at all_ , and like a fool, Kanda still had neglected to tell Alma the truth about who he was. He hadn’t disclosed his identity and he had _kissed him_. How was he supposed to tell Alma who he really was now? Kanda had dug himself in a deep hole and he had no idea how he’d manage to crawl out of it.  
  
Kanda shook his head. One thing at a time. He couldn’t deal with what was going on between him and Alma now. It would have to wait.  
  
He just needed to get through this examination first.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma was at a loss for where to go when he arrived at the training field. The whole area was huge and it was _crowded_ – more so than what Alma could have prepared himself for. He had been told again and again that this examination often attracted a lot of attention in Ilveria, but this went beyond any expectations he had previously held.   
  
_‘I wish I knew where Allen was.’_ Alma looked around somewhat nervously. He had just entered through one of the open paths in-between the terraced seating, both areas on either side of him full. To his left, he could also see the raised, canopied platform where the queen regent remained, the duke at her side as well as Bookman. A tent was behind them, where Alma imagined the rest of Ilverian exorcists were until they were called to the field.  
  
Already, one exorcist was out on the field – a man whose anti-akuma weapon appeared to be a set of rings on his fingers. The crowd watched as he demonstrated several attacks. Alma realized that examination must have already started.  
  
Immediately, he felt a small nudge of worry – he hoped he hadn’t missed Kanda.  
  
A servant approached Alma – a young woman who was working as an usher. “Do you need help finding a seat?”  
  
Alma paused. “Um. I was actually trying to find my friend? He’s around my age, with white hair and a scar on his face.”  
  
The servant paused as she thought. “Mm. I don’t think I’ve seen him,” she said. “If you’d like to find a seat now, there’s a break between the first and second halves of the examination – you could look for him during then.”  
  
Alma hesitated. He glanced around, wavering with his options. He supposed that he’d be okay sitting by himself if he had to…  
  
“Alma!”  
  
Alma looked, a smile stretching on his face when he saw Allen running over, Timcanpy just behind him. “Hey!”  
  
Allen stopped. “I thought you weren’t coming – did you change your mind?” His smile broadened. “Lavi and I were sitting nearby – we were keeping near the exit so we could get out before the rest of the crowd does when it’s over. You should sit with us.”  
  
“That’d be great,” Alma said. He smiled as Timcanpy nudged his cheek playfully. “I need to leave before it’s over – I’m supposed to be helping at the stables, but the horse master said I didn’t need to be there the whole time.”  
  
Allen nodded. He glanced back at the stands, before nodding Alma to follow. “This way – we’ll go back to where Lavi is.”  
  
Alma followed as Allen led him up into the stands. The terraced seating was a bit narrow, though the stairs were wide enough that they were able to weave in easily. It helped that most people were seated, too.  
  
Lavi was just a few rows up, in the middle. Like Allen had said, they were in a spot where they could exit easily, which would work in Alma’s favor whenever he needed to depart.  
  
Lavi blinked, somewhat surprised when he saw Allen return with Alma. “Hey, you decided to come, too? Allen said you were at the stables.”  
  
Alma smiled sheepishly. “Ah, yeah. I was working, but I can watch for a little bit.”  
  
“That’s good, though – you shouldn’t have to work all the time,” Allen said. He nudged Lavi playfully. “Scooch.”  
  
“Always telling me what to do – you’re starting to sound like Gramps.” Lavi grinned despite his words as he moved over.  
  
Allen sat down next to Lavi, with Alma sitting closest to the edge by the stairs. He looked over, the view they had a clear one. The exorcist with the rings was still on the field, but appeared to be finishing up whatever demonstration he was doing.  
  
Alma turned, looking over at Allen and Lavi curiously. “I haven’t missed much, have I?”  
  
"It just started about a half hour ago, so you haven’t missed too much. The queen regent just did an opening address and General Tiedoll was the first exorcist on the field. Now it’s Marie,” Allen reassured. “This is the first examination you’ve ever seen, right?”  
  
Alma nodded. He looked back onto the field. “So, do they just demonstrate their abilities by themselves?” he asked. “I wasn’t sure what exactly happens during these.”  
  
“It’s a bit similar to how things are done in Liorea – minus the huge crowd,” Lavi explained. “Each examination is divided into two parts. The first part is a singular demonstration, where each exorcist comes out individually to demonstrate several attacks and practices. More advanced exorcists who are already recognized go first, and anyone who hasn’t been recognized will go last. So, that’s what’s going on now.”  
  
Alma nodded. “What’s the second part?”  
  
“It involves each exorcist individually going against the exorcist general. Since the general is the most advanced, he acts as an example opponent against the others,” Lavi continued. “It can be a good indicator for how much the other exorcists are advancing and if any of them could make for future generals in other units.”  
  
“Wow, that sounds really intense,” Alma murmured, as he looked back to the field. He rested his chin in his hand. Thinking back, he now understood why Kanda must have been so stressed about this – doing all of that while in front of a crowd sounded daunting.  
  
Marie retracted his strings, finishing his demonstration. The crowd applauded, Alma watching as he departed from the field, the next exorcist walking onto the field as the announcer called his name. “Daisya Barry of the Ilverian Exorcist Unit!”  
  
Alma watched as Daisya activated his anti-akuma weapon. “It’s…a ball?” he asked, not understanding how it would work.  
  
“Yeah, and I bet he’s about to show off,” Lavi pointed out. “In three, two, one-“  
  
Daisya tossed the ball, kicking it with a shocking velocity as it flew all the way to the other end of the field, impacting the ground with an explosion. People gasped, the ones closest to the impact having been some of the more finely dressed nobles.  
  
Alma’s hands flew to his mouth, eyes wide from surprise. Beside him, both Allen and Lavi started laughing.  
  
Lavi doubled over. “Shit, he’s going to get busted for that later on – those were the _advisors_. What a ballsy move!”  
  
Despite the initial shock, Alma stifled a laugh behind his hands. He felt badly for doing so, but considering how stiff some of the advisors looked, it _was_ rather funny.  
  
“Looks like Duke Legory just about had a heart attack,” Allen said, nodding toward where the duke was with the queen regent. “I think Mahoja’s going to say something to Daisya.”  
  
Alma watched. A tall, broad-shouldered woman had approached Daisya, though it was impossible to know what she was saying. A disapproving scowl painted her face, but she left the field once more, allowed Daisya to summon back his weapon and resume his demonstration.  
  
The rest of the demonstration continued on without any further explosions. Alma kept quiet as he observed, with Allen and Lavi occasionally speaking to one another or commenting on something. Alma attempted to pay attention to them, but his thoughts continuously wandered back to Kanda – would he be after Daisya?  
  
“I think Prince Yuu is next,” one of the spectators murmured behind Alma.  
  
Alma glanced back slightly, though he didn’t say anything. He was under the impression that the prince would be last, since he would be considered the newest exorcist to be joining the unit officially. So, Kanda would have been before him, right? _‘They’re probably wrong,’_ he thought. _‘Maybe they’re just eager to see the prince.’_  
  
Daisya finished, grabbing his weapon. The crowd applauded once more, the exorcist grinning impishly before he left the field, just as the next exorcist exited the tent.  
  
Alma’s heart jumped into his throat. He recognized Kanda immediately, his sword in its sheath.  
  
“Crown Prince Yuu of Ilveria!”  
  
 _‘What?’_ Alma stared in confusion, the applause around him much louder than what it had been for the previous two exorcists. _‘But that’s…’_  
  
“Wow, I think Kanda actually seems a bit nervous,” Allen commented. “He looks way tenser than usual.”  
  
Alma turned somewhat sharply, gaze still flummoxed. “He’s…the prince?”  
  
Allen looked back at Alma. “Yeah. He prefers to go by his surname with the other exorcists, but that’s him.” He looked a bit perplexed when he noticed Alma’s reaction, tone shifting a little. “You okay?”  
  
As Allen spoke, Lavi’s gaze flickered to Alma. He didn’t say anything, expression neutral.  
  
Alma looked away. He didn’t respond immediately, struggling to process what Allen had just said. _‘Kanda is…’_  
  
His chest tightened, the truth slowly crashing down onto him. The prince. All this time Alma had thought he had been talking to an exorcist, but it had been the _prince_. It had been the prince who he had spilled water on, the prince who had seen him crying, the prince who had gone into the city with him, the prince he had opened up to, the prince who had _kissed him-_  
  
Suddenly, Alma realized how foolish he had been. He realized how foolish he had been and that he was possibly going to lose his stomach right there.  
  
When he didn’t respond, Allen frowned. “Alma-“  
  
Alma stood up abruptly. “I should go.”  
  
“What?” Allen’s confusion festered. “Alma, what’s going on-?”  
  
“It’s nothing,” Alma rushed, his words a bit shaky. He felt lightheaded, too, but he tried to ignore that. “I-I just forgot to do something in the stables. I really have to go now.”  
  
Alma didn’t wait for Allen to say anything else as he hurried down the steps, exiting the seating area. He almost tripped, pausing once he reached the ground level. His gaze flickered to the field one last time to where Kanda was. _‘He’s…’_  
  
Alma left, running as fast as he could.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The examination passed quickly for Kanda – something that he was eternally grateful for. Once he had started with his demonstration, time sped up. To his relief, he had no hiccups during his demonstration and the second half had gone just as smoothly when he had to face Tiedoll. The general was always a strong opponent, and while this time had been no less challenging, Kanda felt confident in how well he had done.  
  
Getting through the whole ordeal had taken a huge weight off of his shoulders.  
  
He remained in the tent with the rest of the exorcists, the examination having just finished. They had just ended the ceremony where all exorcists were acknowledged and Kanda was officially recognized as one, though there would be a special dinner that evening between all the exorcists, as well as Anita and Legory.  
  
“So, how does it feel?” Daisya asked, as he patted Kanda’s shoulder. “You know, with being official now.”  
  
“Tch.” Kanda swatted Daisya’s hand away. “I’d have felt better if you hadn’t nearly blasted the advisors’ faces off.”  
  
Daisya snickered. “Sorry, I never miss an opportunity. Thought you’d have appreciated it.”  
  
“You need to remember that Charity Bell is a _weapon_ , Daisya,” Tiedoll reminded him, words simultaneously kind and stern. “We’re lucky no one was injured.”  
  
“Of course no one was – I’m too strategic for that. Because, it gave everyone some excitement.”  
  
Tiedoll didn’t get a chance to say anything, as the tent curtain pulled back, with Allen and Lavi entering.  
  
“Hey,” Allen said. “We wanted to tell everyone congrats – you all did great out there. Especially with that crowd watching.”  
  
“How’s it looking outside?” Tiedoll asked.  
  
“Still crowded, but they’re moving everyone along,” Lavi answered. “It should be cleared out soon so you guys can leave.”  
  
Kanda kept quiet as he hung back beside Marie. He crossed his arms, listening to the hum of everyone outside. He hoped that they would move quickly – he wanted to get out of that tent and be done with everything already.  
  
“Speaking of leaving,” Allen started, as he turned back to Lavi and lowered his voice. “I’m going to try to find Alma – he seemed really upset about something. He didn’t even stay for half the examination.”  
  
Kanda blinked, attention shifting as he glanced toward where the beansprout was. _‘What?’_  
  
“You sure it wasn’t just work? He said he forgot something.” As Lavi spoke, his gaze flickered to Kanda, their gazes meeting briefly. “Maybe we should give him some time until later – he could be busy now.”  
  
Kanda stilled. The look Lavi had given him had been an oddly knowing one and what the beansprout had said…  
  
Allen frowned. “He could…I don’t know. Something just seemed strange. He seemed so excited about coming at first.”  
  
Kanda tensed. The examination – Alma had come to the _examination_.  
  
Silently, Kanda cursed. If Alma had come to the examination, then there was a terribly high chance that he had found out the truth. There was a chance that he had found out, just as there was a chance he might not have reacted well at all.  
  
Kanda had to find him. He had to find him and try to explain-  
  
He just hoped that Alma would be willing to listen.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma had practically run the whole way back to the stables, his limbs burning by the time he made it. Immediately, he threw himself into work – lifting hay, refilling water for the horses. He did anything he could find. It helped when the examination was over and Alma had to assist with returning the horses to their owners, but that passed too quickly for his liking. Soon enough, that task was done, and Alma once more had to find ways to busy himself.  
  
He needed to distract himself. He didn’t want to think about the examination. He didn’t want to think about Kanda.  
  
The name stung to ponder and Alma bit his lip, insides churning nauseously. _‘Yuu. His name is actually Yuu…’_  
  
Alma felt stupid. Terribly stupid. He realized he must have looked so foolishly naïve not even being able to tell who the crown prince was – he had so blindly assumed that Kanda was an exorcist, and looking back, Alma wanted to wither away in embarrassment. He had been so vulnerable, and he had told Kanda about his mother and his debt. He had been so open, and they had even _kissed_ …  
  
His heart constricted tightly. Heading outside some of the stables, he grabbed a pitchfork and began to collect some more hay.  
  
Somewhat aggressively, Alma stabbed at the hay. He moved quickly, trying desperately to tune out his own thoughts; the effort was in vain as a series of questions continued to spiral through his mind.  
  
Why hadn’t Kanda told him the truth? Alma didn’t understand – Kanda should have corrected him immediately. Kanda should have corrected Alma, because Alma was just a stable boy. He was a _servant_. He certainly wasn’t Kanda’s equal and had Alma known the truth, it would have saved him from whatever he was experiencing now. Disappointment. Heartache.  
  
 _‘Was he…taking advantage of me?’_ Alma thought, though the notion was almost too painful to bear.  
  
What else was Alma supposed to think? Kanda was the prince and it didn’t make sense for him to waste his time on a stable boy. There would be no way for them to keep in contact once Alma left. Maybe at first Alma had thought so, thinking Kanda was only an exorcist. But now? Kanda was the _prince_. He was royalty and would probably go on as soon as Alma left and forget Alma had even existed-  
  
 _“Did you hear that Prince Yuu is supposed to be looking for a fiancée?”_  
  
Abruptly, Alma recalled the conversation he had overheard a few days ago – the one between the maidservants. Somehow, his heart cracked even more. _‘They were saying he’s supposed to be thinking about marrying another noble…’_ he remembered, emotions growing more tumultuous.  
  
Stupid. Why did Alma have to be so _stupid_?  
  
Unexpectedly, Alma’s eyes burned. He cursed to himself as he tried to blink any tears away. No. No, he did _not_ want to cry over this. He hadn’t known Kanda that long, so why bother? He was getting upset for no reason. It wasn’t important. He was going to have to leave, anyways.  
  
He threw the hay down in the stables and took a breath as he sat the pitchfork aside, running his hands over his face. He just needed a minute and he would be _fine._  
  
Someone entered into the stables and Alma quickly composed himself, blinking away any unshed tears. If it was Jirou, the last thing he needed was for the horse master to question why he was upset-  
  
Alma froze as soon as he turned around, Kanda staring right back at him.  
  
Alma didn’t say anything. Every muscle in his body locked up, his whole being paralyzed. He noticed that Kanda also appeared to have frozen up, the prince having turned as rigid as stone.  
  
Sucking in a breath, Alma broke eye contact as he tried to move past Kanda. “I’m really sorry, but I have to go back to work-“  
  
“Alma.” Kanda caught him by the arm. “I need to talk to you-“  
  
Alma abruptly pulled his arm away. Protectively, he hugged himself.  
  
Kanda was at a loss. Seeing Alma close up in such a way was painful to watch, his guts twisting up uneasily at the sight. He took a breath. “You went to the examination.”  
  
It was more a statement than a question. Alma averted his gaze, his fingers still gripping at his arms tightly.  
  
Kanda sighed. “Look, I can explain-“  
  
Alma’s face whipped back in Kanda’s direction. He didn’t give Kanda a chance to say anymore before he broke. “Yuu? _Prince_ Yuu?” he finally asked. “ _That’s_ who you are?”  
  
Kanda grimaced, the words pricking at his skin like needles. “I wasn’t lying about what I go by,” he argued. “It just never came up, okay?”  
  
Alma shook his head, his arms covering his chest as though he were trying to protect whatever he could of his heart. “You didn’t think it was important to bring up? How many times have I seen you since coming here?” His voice trembled, emotions beginning to spill through like a broken dam. “You could have told me when we first met – you could have told me _last night_.”  
  
Kanda struggled to respond. He hadn’t come to fight with Alma, but at the same time he was losing his patience with how the stable boy was reacting. “I didn’t know _how_ – I didn’t do that shit on purpose!”  
  
Alma sucked in a breath. “Right. So, it’s probably my fault for being so stupid I couldn’t tell who the crown prince was,” he said. “I’m not even supposed to be _talking to you_. I shouldn’t have even told you what I did last night!”  
  
“Fucking – I didn’t say you were stupid!” Kanda snapped, growing more and more agitated by how Alma was spiraling. “And why, because that’s how things are in Liorea? You’re not going to get in trouble, if that’s what you’re worried about.”  
  
“That’s _not it_!“ Alma’s voice cracked, chest trembling. He tried to take another breath to steady himself, but the effort was in vain, his emotions tumbling out uncontrollably. “I-I’m a _stable boy_. I’m working off a debt that I’ll probably never be out of for _theft._ I…I just don’t know why you’d…why you’d _lead me on_ -”  
  
Kanda stared, mouth agape. He almost didn’t know what to say, but the accusation sent his blood boiling. “I wasn’t leading you on!” he argued. “I just…I didn’t think it’d matter!“  
  
“Well, it _does_!” Alma looked back at Kanda, his eyes stinging once more. His vision blurred a bit, but he tried to ignore it. “You’re a _prince_ and you’re supposed to be looking for a fiancée, aren’t you? That’s what the servants here have been talking about the last few days! Am I supposed to think _that_ wasn’t going to matter either!?”  
  
Kanda immediately fell silent. He was completely at a loss, unable to counter Alma’s accusation.  
  
His silence spoke volumes, though – and it was enough to also cause Alma to also fall soundless, his eyes glassy.  
  
Alma couldn’t even say anymore, any words disappearing before he could find them. He didn’t even know how to say what he felt in that moment, but suddenly, it was too much. He felt as though he was going to be sick, and he didn’t think he could take anymore humiliation that day.  
  
Like a heavy shroud, defeat befell Alma’s shoulders. He broke eye contact, eyes painfully hot as his vision blurred together. He silently prayed his tears wouldn’t fall in front of Kanda. “I’m really busy,” he finally said, words quiet. “We’ll probably be leaving tomorrow and I have to make sure the horses are ready.”  
  
Kanda stopped, the sight of Alma’s heartbroken expression more than enough to abate his mounting anger. He took a breath, trying to calm himself as he spoke. He didn’t want this to be their last interaction. “Alma…”  
  
Alma didn’t give Kanda a chance to say anything else. “Congratulations on making it through the examination,” he murmured, before adding almost inaudibly, as he looked up at Kanda, “Your Highness.”  
  
Kanda fell silent, the formality of Alma’s words a knife into his chest. He didn’t even attempt to say anything else, the sentiment infinitely more painful than kind, their gazes locking.  
  
Sharply, Kanda turned away as he stalked out of the stables, leaving Alma behind.  
  
If Alma didn’t want to talk, then Kanda wouldn’t make him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course, the sweetness that same from the last chapter couldn’t last. ;__;
> 
> It was inevitable that Alma was going to find out that Kanda was royalty - I think I mentioned in one of the earlier notes that while this story is essentially a Swan Lake AU, there are elements I took from the story of Giselle (which, surprise: involves a peasant girl falling in love with a young man who happens to have been hiding the fact that he’s nobility and engaged to someone else - you can imagine the sad things this leads to). Of course, Kanda didn’t do this maliciously - he sort of dug himself into a hole without realizing it until it was a little too late. 
> 
> From here on, this is where the drama really is going to start ramping up, though - especially starting with the next chapter. I do want to mention that this story does get heavy with angst at times from here on out, though there _will_ be a happy ending. Eventually. After a lot of agony and suffering. 8D
> 
> Speaking of - I lied about the length. In my previous note I had said this would be 28 chapters, but this actually will be 29. I officially completed the draft for NaNoWriMo (HALLELUJAH) _and_ drafted an NSFW one-shot since there will be no NSFW in this fic. (Basically, I wanted bonus payoff for all the suffering. XD)
> 
> (On more of a sidetone, it’s two days until Alma’s birthday. May we all honor the little cinnamon roll. XD)
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, as angsty as it got at the end. As always, any kudos and comments are appreciated. <3


	12. When the Storm Comes

Outside was overcast – a strange departure from the usual, clear blue sky that normally stretched overhead. Gray clouds hung low, the air a few degrees cooler than it had been the past few days. The earth was perfumed by the scent of oncoming rain, the shadows in the forest dark and damp, a breeze swaying the branches as leaves rustled.  
  
Tyki leaned against a tree, the mossy bark cool against his back. His white hood was pulled up as he rolled his head back, shoulders slumped as he rested languidly. Arms crossed, he closed his eyes, the forest quiet around him.  
  
A black butterfly fluttered, landing onto his shoulder. Without opening his eyes, Tyki spoke. “Wisely’s getting impatient, huh?” He laughed to himself quietly. “Figures. He’ll complain about never wanting to be rushed but doesn’t mind whining at me to hustle.”  
  
The butterfly didn’t move, its wings keeping still.  
  
Tyki’s lips curled into a smirk. “Don’t worry,” he murmured. “We’ll get this finished soon.”  
  
He opened his eyes, golden irises piercing as he looked through the trees. In the distance, he could see the skyline of the Ilverian city. “It won’t be much longer now.”  
  
The butterfly flapped its wings silently.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“You sure you want me to stay?” Lavi asked. He watched as Bookman collected the rest of his things, the guest room in a disarray.  
  
It was early morning, but Bookman had already been up, preparing to leave with the duke’s traveling party. Since he didn’t have many personal items, it hadn’t been a tedious affair – but getting together any materials and research had been another story. Papers were haphazardly shoved together, folded up into all sorts of strange ways. In fact, the majority of Bookman’s two bags were only papers and books.  
  
“I’m sure – I wouldn’t have said it if I wasn’t.” Bookman plucked a few loose sheets of paper from the ground. He scowled when he realized it was nothing more than scribbles. “Hmph.”  
  
Lavi grabbed some papers off the bed. While he wasn’t the tidiest person in the world, he felt a bit guilty about the room being left in such a state. “I know, but I was just checking.” He stacked a few more journals into his grasp. “Gee, were you just hoarding documents in here this whole time?”  
  
Bookman ignored him as he shoved a few more notes into his bag.  
  
Lavi crossed his arms. His lips pressed together, expression pensive. “You think you’ll have any issues getting back to Liorea?”  
  
Bookman huffed. “I’d hope not, but we can never be too sure. Between myself and Allen, I think we will be alright. Legory was particular about the guards he chose.”  
  
Lavi nodded, but his uncertainty remained.  
  
“What’s the matter with you?” Bookman asked as he looked at Lavi sharply. “You’re acting like you don’t want to stay, but you always complain about not visiting enough.”  
  
“What? I didn’t say anything.” Lavi shook his head. “Sheesh, don’t be jumping down my throat.”  
  
Bookman eyed him, gaze shrewd. However, he didn’t push the subject any further. “You know what to look for. When the CROWs arrive here, keep an eye on them and see how they acclimate. In the meantime, keep working through those archives. I’ll be working in Liorea to see if we missed anything.”  
  
Lavi nodded. “You don’t have to tell me twice,” he said. He glanced out the window. “Wow, it’s looking pretty cloudy out.”  
  
“Mm. Ilveria is due for some rain – there’s hardly been any since we arrived.” Bookman sniffed. “Though I’d prefer it to start after we’ve left. It’s always annoying to travel in that weather.”  
  
“That’s soon, isn’t it?” Lavi still looked outside, the sunlight completely blocked as the clouds shrouded the sky like a slate-colored mist. “Kind of weird that the examination is already over with.”  
  
Bookman didn’t respond as he grabbed his two bags. “I’m heading to the front. They’ll be loading the carriages and I’m sure the duke will be eager to return to Liorea as well.”  
  
Lavi nodded. “I’ll head with you – can’t let everyone leave without saying goodbye.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The carriages were nearly ready by the time Anita made it to the castle entrance. The footmen finished loading any suitcases and belongings, all baggage secured before the Lioreans’ departure. The horses remained patient as they shook their manes, periodically pawing at the ground; they were readied as well, the guards already stationed to leave.  
  
Legory was outside. With him, his valet, Matthew, attended to any last-minute details.  
  
Anita approached the duke. “Do you have everything you need?”  
  
Legory hummed. “I suppose so. We’re eager to return, so the sooner the better.”  
  
Anita nodded. She glanced toward the sky, the clouds having darkened a bit. “I understand you wish to return – but I did want to offer you to stay one more night if you’d like. It looks like we’ll be getting some rain here shortly. We don’t typically have storms, but traveling in the rain can be a bit tedious.”  
  
Legory shook his hand. “I don’t think it’ll be necessary,” he said, as he glanced toward the horses. “We made sure to bring some of our best horses, so it won’t be a problem for them.”  
  
While Anita and Legory continued with their discussion, Alma secured the reins on Saori. He had just finished double-checking the rest of the horses, ensuring that every saddle was fastened and every buckle latched. He didn’t want any hiccups once they were on the move and wanted to make sure the departure would go as smoothly as possible.  
  
Leaving. They were finally leaving.  
  
The thought loomed over his head heavily, shoulders slumping. He gently stroked the mane of his horse, the hairs soft and distracting. _‘Guess that’s it…’_ he thought, his heart heavy as though it had been filled with lead.  
  
Allen approached him, Timcanpy perched on his shoulder. “Hey,” he greeted. “You ready?”  
  
Alma nodded, his throat tight. “Yeah.” He forced a smile, swallowing the pain in his chest. “Did you get to say goodbye to Lavi?”  
  
Allen paused. A hint of concern glimmered in his eyes, but he shook his head. “Not yet,” he said, as he glanced back – just as Bookman and Lavi exited the main doors. “But I guess I will now.”  
  
Alma’s smile remained. “Better go, then,” he said. “I’m just finishing up here with Saori.”  
  
Allen nodded. He waited a second, but then left Alma be.  
  
A sigh of relief escaped Alma and he returned his attention to Saori. He ran his hand over the horse’s mane once more, his core feeling terribly hollow.  
  
As he ran his hand up and down, a glint of gold caught his attention. Looking back, Alma realized he still was wearing the lotus bracelet on his wrist – the one that Kanda had given to him.  
  
Guilt nipped at his insides. Alma should have given it back. He uneasily clasped at his right wrist, tugging his sleeve so it covered the bracelet – he didn’t know how he’d return it without drawing attention to himself, but he didn’t feel comfortable displaying it anymore. Quietly, he glanced back toward the doors; the queen regent was still speaking to Legory and Bookman, and Allen was saying goodbye to Lavi. And…  
  
Alma stiffened. Kanda walked out with the general – Tiedoll, if Alma recalled correctly. His attention naturally zoned in on Kanda, who was dressed a bit more nicely than what Alma had previously seen him in. More regal and refined.  
  
Once more, Alma felt like a fool for not having realized he was the prince. The air about him. His mannerisms. Even if Kanda was a more laid-back noble, it was so _obvious_.  
  
Abruptly, he tore his gaze away before he could risk meeting Kanda’s stare.  
  
By the doors, Kanda looked around. He had been asked to come by his aunt, though Tiedoll had done his part to make sure that he actually showed. Since he hadn’t been present to greet the duke when he arrived, it was expected that he would at least be present to see the party off – even more so considering the duke had given Kanda such well-received feedback on his performance as an exorcist. It was annoying to think that he was almost indebted to the duke in a way.  
  
Kanda could have cared less about seeing Legory off, though, his attention divided. He glanced around, gaze scanning over the carriages and the guards-  
  
He spotted Alma almost instantly. The stable boy was a bit behind the carriages, getting his horse ready. His back was turned to the main doors, though, keeping his face obscured.  
  
Immediately, Kanda thought back to their last interaction the previous day. The hurt words. The heartbroken look in Alma’s eyes. The memories flurried through his mind like splinters of ice.  
  
More than anything, Kanda wished that Alma would turn around.  
  
“Don’t forget to come back to Liorea when you’re done getting through all those archives,” Allen was saying to Lavi, the two of them within Kanda’s earshot. “I may start to worry I’ll never see you again.”  
  
Kanda snorted at the sentiment.  
  
Lavi turned to Kanda. “What’s with you? For someone who just made it through their examination with flying colors, I’d have thought you’d be a little nicer.”  
  
Allen’s attention lingered on Kanda, though he didn’t say anything to the prince. Instead, he refocused on Lavi. “I should get going – my horse is ready.”  
  
“Right.” Lavi shifted, turning a bit awkward. “Be safe – on your way back, you know?”  
  
Allen chuckled. “Concerned for my safety?” he questioned teasingly. “Don’t worry – I have Tim with me.”  
  
A slight flush colored Lavi’s freckled cheeks. He managed a small, almost nervous laugh. “Yeah, I know Tim will keep an eye on things.”  
  
Kanda tuned out the rest of their conversation, not really interested in their exchange. Instead, his gaze once more drifted to where Alma was, the stable boy still facing the opposite direction. He frowned. He would have thought that Alma would have turned at _some_ point-  
  
Suddenly, Kanda realized that Alma was probably avoiding him.  
  
It felt as though he had been gut-punched, the wind knocked from his lungs. Tensing up, Kanda kept his arms crossed as he tore his attention away from Alma.  
  
Anita turned, catching sight of her nephew. “Yuu,” she called, motioning for him to come over.  
  
Inwardly, Kanda sighed. He walked over to where Anita and Legory were, expression tinged with the faintest hint of annoyance.  
  
Legory did the honor of speaking first. “It was a pleasure overseeing your examination – you did much better than expected.”  
  
Kanda’s muscles twitched as he attempted to ignore the backhanded compliment. He knew that he should have said something, even a simple “thank you” – but Kanda was certain something less polite would slip out if he spoke.  
  
“Your expertise was very much appreciated. We know it was a great deal of work,” Anita said.  
  
Legory nodded. He looked back at Kanda. “You certainly have the potential to reach the level of an exorcist general, though I imagine that possibility would be some time considering the current situation,” he said, before turning to Anita. “The CROWs should be arriving here in a few weeks – I hope they will provide you with the assistance you need.”  
  
“Thank you.” Anita smiled kindly. “I’m sure they will. Please be safe on your travels back to Liorea.”  
  
The duke nodded once more, taking his leave. Kanda watched as he climbed into the first carriage while Bookman stopped beside them.  
  
“I’ve spoken to Lavi – he will help to keep an eye on things when the CROWs arrive,” Bookman said. “I appreciate you allowing him to stay.”  
  
“Of course,” Anita said. “He’s welcome to stay as long as he likes. And as always, you are, too.”  
  
“Thank you.” Bookman’s eyes shifted to Kanda. “Behave.”  
  
Kanda scowled. _That’s_ what Bookman was going to say to him before leaving? He needed to save his lectures for Lavi – if anyone would misbehave, it’d be him.  
  
Anita brought her hand to her mouth, lips having quirked into a smile. “I think he will,” she said. “Take care.”  
  
Bookman nodded, departing afterward. He got into the second carriage behind Legory’s, the footmen shutting the doors behind them. Allen also returned to his horse – which was right next to Alma’s.  
  
Again, Kanda’s attention shifted to the stable boy. He was unable to stop himself as his gaze lingered, Alma mounting Saori. Inside, Kanda’s heart screamed for him to say something. Do something. _Anything-  
  
‘Don’t let him leave like this.’_  
  
He remained frozen, words lodged in his throat. Again, his mind replayed their last interaction, the sting of it raw and painful.  
  
The drivers whipped the reins, the horses starting off. As the carriages pulled away, Kanda was unable to tear his gaze away from Alma as he rode passed them.  
  
For a fleeting second, Alma’s attention moved. He chanced a look toward the steps of the main entrance, and by some cruel twist of fate, he made eye contact with Kanda directly.  
  
In the blink of an eye, Alma looked forward, pulling the hood of his cloak over his head.  
  
Once the carriages had moved through the main gates, Tiedoll walked up to Anita. “It seems we survived another examination,” he said. “Quite the visit.”  
  
Anita nodded. She turned back to Tiedoll. “We should go in and find Mahoja – I wanted to talk about preparations for when the CROWs arrive. I’d like for you to join us.”  
  
“Certainly.”  
  
As they walked back into the castle, Kanda remained. His attention lingered on the gates, even as the last of the Lioreans disappeared from sight.  
  
He realized that he had never even apologized to Alma.  
  
Lavi turned. He hadn’t gone inside yet, his focus having shifted to Kanda. Somewhat warily, he eyed him. “You okay?”  
  
The simple question was a sting to his nerves, and Kanda sneered. “Why wouldn’t I be?” he snapped. “I’m glad to have this shit over with.”  
  
Lavi frowned. He didn’t say anything as Kanda stalked back into the castle, nor did he go after him. Even if Kanda hadn’t confirmed it, Lavi knew he was upset.  
  
Lavi paused, looking back up. He noticed the clouds were moving a bit quicker, the wind having picked up. _‘Hope it doesn’t get too bad out there…’_  
  
Exhaling, Lavi turned, heading back inside.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The study was spacious and quiet, and one that Anita used often. The windows were large and tall, the walls painted a rich teal. The curtains were pulled back, allowing the light to spill in, the gray sky bright outside, providing just enough illumination that no candle needed to be lit.  
  
Anita entered, finding a seat on one of the divans. There were several other chairs and sofas centered around a fireplace, while a desk remained at the other end of the room.  
  
Mahoja and Tiedoll followed, shutting the door behind them.  
  
“How was it?” Mahoja asked. “Did the duke say anything about the CROWs?”  
  
Anita waited until both Tiedoll and Mahoja had also found seats. “He didn’t say much else aside from what we already have been told – they should be here in just a few weeks. Probably before the Midsummer Ball. We’d be lucky if it turned out that way, especially with all the visitors we’ll have.”  
  
“We’ll have to acclimate them,” Tiedoll pointed out. “With both the guards and the exorcists – how many should we be expecting?”  
  
“They’ll be sending two,” Anita explained. “After what happened with the group that was going to Othelion, they don’t want to risk losing a large number of CROWs. Hopefully, that won’t be an issue again.”  
  
Mahoja nodded. “I can work with the guards on preparations. I don’t foresee them having any problems with this.”  
  
Anita paused, turning back to Tiedoll. “And you still haven’t seen any other akuma activity?”  
  
Tiedoll shook his head. “No – which could be a good or bad thing.” He brought his fingers to his chin, expression contemplative. “Marie and I started rounds earlier this morning – we actually went a bit into the forest to look around the main road. To make sure there was nothing unusual before the duke left. Everything was quiet.”  
  
Anita’s lips pursed, her thin brow faintly furrowing. While she was pleased that there had been no further akuma attacks, she couldn’t ignore the way her spine tingled, something subconscious squirming in discomfort. They had always dealt with akumas as a potential threat, but perhaps it was the knowledge of what had been happening in Othelion that unsettled her. Maybe that was all it was.  
  
After a pause, Tiedoll spoke up again. “I wanted to ask,” he started, as he looked at Anita. “How would you like me to oversee Kanda’s exorcist training? I imagine he’d still have to train in some capacity, despite not being actively on the frontline.”  
  
Anita nodded. “Yes – I’m going to speak with him a bit more about his schedule. After I do that, I can let you know,” she said. “I wanted to at least give him a day or two after it. He seemed a bit preoccupied this morning.”  
  
Tiedoll hummed. He had noticed that Kanda had been a bit quiet and distant – even more so than normal. But then again, the last few days had been tedious. “It’s been a stressful time. I think moving forward in a day or so would be best.”  
  
The general stood up. “I should return to the training room to check on things – please let me know if there’s anything else you need.”  
  
Anita smiled. “Thank you.”  
  
Tiedoll departed, leaving Anita and Mahoja alone. Once the door shut behind him, Mahoja turned to Anita. She took notice of how the queen regent had turned somewhat pensive upon the general’s departure and frowned. “Is something wrong?”  
  
Anita looked back and shook her head. “No – no, I’m just overthinking things.” She paused, a contemplative look flickering in her dark eyes. “I’d like to hope so, at least.”  
  
Mahoja nodded in understanding.  
  
Anita stood up. She walked over to the window, glancing outside. The clouds had darkened a little, but Ilveria rarely received heavy storms. With how mild their climate was, they usually only received rain, with any heavier showers arriving more in autumn. If anything, this would be a fleeting summer storm. Anita hoped so.  
  
Mahoja also stood, going over to where Anita was. She stopped just behind the queen regent.  
  
Softly, Anita spoke. “I just wonder what they want…what they’re looking for.”  
  
Mahoja kept silent. Even without any further elaboration, she understood what Anita was referring to.  
  
Mahoja sighed. “I don’t know…”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Hooves beat onto the ground, the horses trotting along. The Lioreans wasted no time traveling through the city, cutting down the main road and across the fields. Despite the queen regent’s previous warning, no rain had fallen, though the sky remained dark and the air cool, tall grass swaying in the wind as it blew.  
  
Alma kept his hood up, tugging at the edge. The wind was a bit rougher when they crossed through the open fields, but once they entered the forest it lessened, the trees breaking the impact. Branches above swayed gently, enough light spilling through the leaves so that the party was able to see where they were going.  
  
 _‘That’s really it…’_ Alma thought. A painful tug pulled in his chest, one that yearned for him to glance back one last time. However, he forced himself not to. He didn’t want to look back until they were deep enough into the forest, the kingdom of Ilveria completely out of sight. If he did, he didn’t think he’d be able to keep his emotions intact – he already struggled so much with controlling them to begin with.  
  
Besides – it wasn’t as though he’d ever go back. There was no point.  
  
He sucked in a breath, the sensation akin to swallowing a thick lump. Alma knew it was his own fault. He had completely let his guard down, and for what? Some crush that would have never gone anywhere to begin with? Alma didn’t even know what had come over him. Even if Kanda hadn’t been royalty, had he really thought that they would have been able to keep in touch with each other after he left? That it could have gone somewhere?  
  
 _‘Maybe.’_  
  
The fact that Alma wanted to still hope was torturous enough to crush his own heart. No matter how much he tried to rationalize his thoughts, some stupid, childish part of himself wanted it to work. Some stupid, childish part of himself wanted to _stay_.  
  
He tried to repress that desire. It didn’t matter now. Alma never would have a chance with Kanda. He was royalty and the whimsy of hoping for anything else was laughable. Kanda hadn’t even cared to tell Alma the truth and what did that say? Even if he had taken Alma into the city and spent time with him…Kanda was still a prince and would eventually have to marry a noble. Not some plain stable boy with a debt to pay.  
  
Alma really had thought Kanda liked him.  
  
His grip tightened on the reins of his horse, knuckles turning white. On his right wrist, the bracelet slipped out from beneath his sleeve, catching Alma’s attention. His stomach knotted, and again, he shoved it beneath his clothing quickly. He wasn’t even sure why he hadn’t ripped it off already – it didn’t mean anything.  
  
 _“I wanted to get it for you. Before you left.”_  
  
Alma bit his bottom lip, eyes beginning to sting. He fought to stay calm; he couldn’t allow himself to fall apart while they were traveling. Gently, he tugged the hem of his hood a bit further as he blinked away any unshed tears.  
  
 _‘Don’t,_ ’ he warned himself. Alma had to remember this was better. He had told Kanda so much and must have looked so dumb and _naïve_. Alma was lucky that what had happened hadn’t gotten back to the duke somehow – he realized he could have possibly lost his position over this. The thought alone made him nauseous. Leaving now was a blessing. Feelings or not, he couldn’t overlook that.  
  
Still – that didn’t make the whole ordeal any less painful.  
  
Allen looked over. He was riding alongside Alma, though the two of them hadn’t really spoken since they departed. His attention lingered as he took note of the way Alma had concealed his face.  
  
Taking the reins, Allen directed his horse so he got a bit closer to Alma. “Hey,” he started, greeting gentle.  
  
Alma turned. He was momentarily unsure of how to respond, having been somewhat lost in his own thoughts. However, he smiled weakly, forcing his emotions back into a tiny little box. “Hey,” he said. “What’s up?”  
  
Allen paused. He appeared to be contemplating his next words, which he spoke somewhat cautiously. “I wanted to ask if you were doing okay? Yesterday you kind of ran off at the examination…I couldn’t find you after.”  
  
Immediately, Alma’s smile faltered. He looked forward, breaking eye contact as that annoying sting returned. “Yeah, I’m okay.” His response was rushed and a little edgy. “I just had a lot to do. I shouldn’t have even gone.”  
  
 _‘Then you wouldn’t have known he was lying to you,’_ a small voice added, disrupting Alma’s thoughts once more. His chest tightened at the thought, a bitter taste trickling into his mouth.  
  
A small frown tugged at Allen’s lips. “Yeah…” He released a small breath as he kept his voice low so that no one else would hear. “I just wanted to let you know if anything happened-”  
  
“ _Nothing_ happened, okay?” Alma broke, something small _snapping_ inside. He turned, blue eyes flashing unexpectedly. “It wasn’t anything, so stop _asking_ -“  
  
He cut off. Alma had turned back to Allen abruptly, his voice disappearing as he saw the exorcist’s expression – caught off guard and surprised. Alma’s face heated up and he turned away, abashed as guilt blossomed in his chest.  
  
“I-I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I didn’t mean to…”  
  
Alma was close to withering in embarrassment. It was one thing to be upset at himself, but another thing to lash out at _Allen_ – Allen, who was one of the only good friends he had ever had. _Would_ ever have.  
  
Allen shook his head. “Hey, it’s okay,” he reassured. “I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that.”  
  
Alma chewed his lip and nodded. Even though Allen seemed to understand he hadn’t meant to snap, he still felt terrible for doing so, the need to justify his actions intensifying. “I just,” he started, before shaking his head. He looked back at Allen apologetically. “I just…don’t really want to talk about it. It wasn’t even anything that important.”  
  
Allen nodded. He smiled kindly. “You don’t have to, then.” His words were patient and soft – almost as though he were speaking to a wounded creature. “But if you ever want to talk, I’m here, you know? You’re my friend and I want to be there for you.”  
  
The words were spoken genuinely, and despite his discomfort, Alma managed a small smile. His gaze turned appreciative as he relaxed a hair. “Thanks.”  
  
A strong gust of wind blew through, distracting them both. Alma’s cloak whipped, the wind pushing his head a bit forward as he ducked down, clutching the edge of his hood.  
  
Allen did the same, catching Timcanpy as the golem threatened to fall off his shoulder. “Careful, Tim.”  
  
The gust passed and Alma looked up. He glanced around, checking the horses – so far, they all still looked okay to continue, but he hoped it wouldn’t get any worse out. If it did, they may have to stop.  
  
Hopefully, it wouldn’t come to that.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
He watched the party move through the woods, keeping to the main road as they trekked on. Two horse-drawn carriages moved as several guards flanked each side, two more riders following behind – one, that he recognized as an exorcist.  
  
Tyki smirked. He had wondered when they would show up and was pleased that he hadn’t needed to wait too long.  
  
Waving his hand, a wisp of black smoke appeared, turning into another black butterfly. Its wings fluttered silently as it hovered near Tyki. “Pick the one with the darkest heart,” he whispered to it gently. “You’ll know who it is.”  
  
The butterfly flapped its wings, silently flying off.  
  
Tyki grinned.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The first carriage drew to a stop. The two horses drawing it pawed, hooves digging into the ground as they snorted; confused, the driver whipped the reins, urging them to move. “Come on, now – get on!”  
  
The second carriage stopped behind it, as well as the rest of the riders. Some of the guards looked on in confusion, while Legory looked out the window from the first carriage. His face scrunched up in annoyance. “What on earth is wrong now? Why have we stopped?”  
  
The driver looked back. “The horses won’t go any farther, Your Grace – I’m not sure what’s wrong with them.”  
  
Legory exhaled in a huff. “This nonsense again.” Hadn’t this happened on their way to Ilveria as well?  
  
“Get the stable boy to look at them and see what’s wrong,” Legory ordered. “I’d like to not sit here and waste away all day.”  
  
The diver nodded. He turned back, motioning toward Alma. “Oi, get up here and check these horses!”  
  
Alma hopped off of his horse, hurrying up to the front. Quickly, he began to check both of the horses drawing the carriage, checking their legs and hooves to see if there may have been any injury. A small frown tugged at his lips; he couldn’t find anything visibly wrong.  
  
The carriage driver looked at Alma questioningly. “Do you know what it is?”  
  
Alma paused. He tugged on the reins of one of the horses, gently urging the beast to move. “Come on,” he insisted softly. “What’s wrong? This is the same route we traveled before…”  
  
Legory looked back out the window, impatience brimming. “Do you know what’s wrong or don’t you?” he asked. “You were supposed to make sure the horses were fine _before_ we left.”  
  
Alma winced. “I-I don’t know,” he finally managed, as he tried to nudge the horses to come forward. “They don’t have any injuries, but they don’t want to move-“  
  
Legory shook his head in annoyance. “Can someone _else_ see if they can get the horses to move?”  
  
Allen frowned. “If Alma can’t get them to move, I don’t think anyone else will be able to,” he pointed out. “He’s the one who has the most experience with them.”  
  
The duke ignored him, motioning for one of the guards to assist. The guard awkwardly obliged, walking over to the horses at the front. Roughly, he took the reins as he tried to tug one of the horses forward. Immediately, the horse resisted, shaking its head as it dug its hooves into the ground.  
  
“Wait – don’t be so rough,” Alma tried to explain. The guard ignored him, though, and Alma’s frustration began to brim. “You’re just going to upset them!”  
  
The horse snorted. It shook its mane at first, still resisting.  
  
The guard exhaled and shook his head. He looked back toward the others. “They won’t move – maybe we should wait a few minutes?”  
  
Legory threw his hand up. “Fine – five minutes, then do something. We can’t just sit out here.”  
  
The guard nodded.  
  
Alma paused, looking at the horses once more. He wasn’t sure what had caused them to stop – or be so resistant. A wave of defeat befell him, though, and Alma worried; he hoped he could figure out what was wrong, or else Legory would probably direct the blame back to him.  
  
Exhaling, Alma returned back to check on his horse. Saori seemed fine as well, though he noticed she also appeared a bit hesitant to move forward as he tugged on the reins. Alma frowned.  
  
Allen looked over curiously. “You have any idea what’s going on?”  
  
Alma thought. “I don’t think any of them want to move forward,” he said. Carefully, he mounted his horse, cueing her to move – however, Saori shook her head, hooves pawing the ground as well. “Saori, what’s wrong?”  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, Alma saw something flicker.  
  
He blinked, just as something flew in front of him. Black wings, a violet sheen – it took Alma a moment to register what it was, an unsettling sense of familiarity befalling him. _‘What…?’_  
  
“There’s something up ahead!”  
  
Alma turned, looking ahead. Confused, he saw the silhouette of a figure – hidden away in the shadows of the trees, their outline barely visible. They remained still, and motionless; Alma suddenly wondered how long they had been there for, his insides churning at the thought.  
  
Immediately, Allen’s left eye changed, the white turning black and his iris to red. His attention zoned in on the figure, a frown tugging on his lips. “Something isn’t right,” he said. “That doesn’t seem like an akuma, but-“  
  
An explosion hit the group from the side. The horses whinnied, their heads rearing back as the guards shouted. “We’re being attacked!”  
  
Quickly, Allen activated his innocence – his left arm turning black as his fingers extended into thin, blade like claws. However, before he could act something swooped overhead, the cloud of smoke swirling around the party.  
  
The guards ducked, drawing their weapons. They looked around, trying to determine where the assailant was, but again something flapped high above, hidden in the smog. “It’s above us!”  
  
Alma held onto Saori, the reins tight in his grasp. The horses whinnied, panicking as they kicked about nervously. Quickly, he tried to calm Saori-  
  
The creature flew, the sound of large wings beating against the air. Allen looked up, his left eye immediately picking up on something through the smoke – the outline of dark, violet energy burning as he slowly made out a silhouette. Quickly, he jumped off his horse, running to the front. “Everyone get down – it’s an akuma!”  
  
The door to the second carriage opened as Bookman hurried out to where Allen was. He pulled out a set of needles, which glowed as he extended them. “Where is it now!?”  
  
A blast came from above, the explosion hitting in front of the carriages.  
  
Everything fell into chaos. The guards shouted, getting to the front to help fight against the akuma, while the drivers attempted to keep the horses from going into hysteria. Saori kicked back, the movement catching Alma off guard. Alarm coloring his face, he tried to hold on. “Saori, don’t-!”  
  
He cried out as he was thrown off his horse. His head knocked against the ground, vision spotting as he tried to get back up. Before he could push himself up, another attack blasted, the earth trembling beneath him.  
  
Dizzily, Alma tried to get up once. He could hear the guards fighting something, but his senses were distorted, ears ringing from the noise. He blinked blearily, his vision slowly coming back into focus. Smoke encompassed the whole road, making it difficult for Alma to see-  
  
Again, he saw a black butterfly.  
  
Alma stared. Was he hallucinating? He pushed himself up onto his elbows, just as the butterfly landed on his knee.  
  
Someone whispered from behind him. “Guess it chose you,” they spoke. “How interesting.”  
  
Even in his distortion, a sense of panic overcame him. He tried to run, but was stopped as someone grabbed his shoulders. “Someone, help-!”  
  
A hand covered his mouth and nose, cutting Alma off. He tried to fight back, to pry off the hands of the stranger – but his attempted cries were muffled as he was yanked backwards. He kicked, struggling to break free as he saw the silhouette of the others through the smoke.  
  
Eventually, the lack of oxygen took its toll – and Alma’s vision faded to black as he heard the sound of the others screaming.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The study alcove was quiet, the space nestled on the second level of the library. It was hidden behind several of the stacks; a cushioned bench at the base of the window that made for a nice reading spot, several pillows were tucked into the corner for comfort. Dull light spilled through the window, the overcast sky close to blinding.  
  
Kanda looked out the window. He leaned against the bench, shoulder pressed against the glass as his arms remained crossed. His attention hadn’t wavered since he found the spot not long after the Lioreans departed. Kanda had wanted to find somewhere where no one would disturb him and this seemed like one of the least likely areas for him to be discovered.  
  
He couldn’t stop thinking about Alma.  
  
The faintest frown tugged at his lips, eyes distant and stormy. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Alma ever since the previous day – before that, even. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Alma since they went into the city together. Since they had spent time together. Since they had _kissed_.  
  
He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Alma ever since he had found the truth out. That Kanda was the prince, who hadn’t even bothered to disclose that information.

  
The memory left a bitter taste in Kanda’s mouth. He could still recall the look on Alma’s face when he had confronted him about his identity and questioned him as to why he hadn’t said anything. He could still recall the tremble in Alma’s voice and the _hurt_ in his eyes.  
  
 _“I just don’t know why…why you’d_ lead me on _-”_  
  
Kanda couldn’t even try to deny how much he had messed up. He wasn’t one to lie about things and it wasn’t as though he had kept his royal status from Alma on purpose. The stable boy had thought he was an exorcist and Kanda hadn’t wanted to deal with the pomp of titles, too burnt out from how chaotic everything else had been in his life. He had been so exhausted by how everyone else fretted over every single detail of his life, and to finally deal with someone who didn’t _care_ …  
  
By the time Kanda had even realized how in deep he was, it had been too late. He wanted to write it off as that he hadn’t thought it would matter – that he hadn’t realized how upset Alma would have been. He wanted to use that excuse, but he couldn’t.  
  
On some intrinsic level, Kanda had known. He had known it wouldn’t have worked out. But he hadn’t said anything, because he had selfishly wanted to hold onto Alma a little bit longer.  
  
 _‘Not that it matters now,’_ he thought, dark blue eyes still gazing outside. Alma was already back on his way to Liorea with the duke and they would probably never see each other again.  
  
His guts twisted up at the thought. Kanda hadn’t wanted to admit it – he hadn’t wanted to admit how attached he had become. He wasn’t even sure how it had happened. It wasn’t as though he had known Alma that long. And it wasn’t as though anything could have ever realistically worked out between them. Like Alma had said – he was a stable boy and Kanda was a prince. In any other situation, their paths never would have crossed to begin with.  
  
Despite this, Kanda couldn’t help but wish that he had gotten one more day with Alma. One more day to see that smile. To hear that laugh. To hold his hand. He liked being with Alma so _much_ …  
  
God, he was pathetic.  
  
“Kanda?”  
  
The voice shattered Kanda’s thoughts. He closed his eyes, brow pinched in annoyance. He didn’t know how he had been tracked, but right now, he was in no mood to talk – not even to Daisya. Deliberately, Kanda ignored him.  
  
Daisya raised an eyebrow. He had just passed by, having stopped upon spotting Kanda. When the prince remained unresponsive, he walked over, poking his shoulder. “Hey.”  
  
Kanda’s muscles twitched. “What the hell do you want?” he asked, voice low and tired.  
  
“Well, I was trying to see if you were alive. Since you were totally zoning out.” Daisya smirked, a teasing glint flickering in his eyes. “The examination didn’t wear you out _that_ much, did it? It was a total breeze.”  
  
Kanda didn’t react. Normally, he might have snapped or lashed out at Daisya, but after the Lioreans had left, he felt oddly depleted. He didn’t even have it in him to bite back – he just wanted to ignore his fellow exorcist. That would make him leave more quickly rather than baiting him with reactions.  
  
It left some impact. Daisya’s smirk wavered, gaze turning somewhat bewildered. He walked over, leaning against the other end of the bench as he waved a hand in Kanda’s face. “Hey. What’s with you?”  
  
“Tch. Nothing.”  
  
“I don’t believe that.” Daisya should his head as he sat back, bringing his leg up onto the bench, posture slouched. “You’re acting _mopey_ – since when do you do that? And you’re hiding in the library of all places. Something’s up.”  
  
Kanda turned, glaring at Daisya. “Well, why the hell are you here? It’s not like you fucking read.”  
  
“Because I was trying to track down the Bookman,” Daisya said. “Marie is meditating and Tiedoll was talking to your aunt. I gave up on finding you and was bored out of mind, so my desperation led me here.”  
  
Kanda scoffed. “So, go find him then. Leave me alone already.”  
  
“Oh, there’s the normal pissy prince I know and love.” Daisya stretched his arms behind his head as he leaned back. “Man, you really do seem to be in a weird mood today.”  
  
Kanda’s gaze turned sharp, his eyes narrowing. “What’s _that_ supposed to mean?”  
  
Daisya shrugged. “You’re normally pretty crabby. But you seem...I don’t know. Extra moody today.” He looked at Kanda, expression turning semi-serious for a moment. “You down about something?”  
  
Kanda glowered. “ _No_.”  
  
“Okay, so yes.” Daisya pushed himself up from the bench as he put up his hands. “Don’t worry – I won’t play therapist. I’ll let Marie or Tiedoll do that.”  
  
Kanda sneered under his breath and looked away. Once more, his attention turned to the window, the forest stretching far into the horizon, the mountains barely visible through the clouds.  
  
Before he could stop himself, he wondered how far Alma and the others had made it.  
  
A sting pierced his chest and Kanda forced himself to ignore the way his heart felt as though it were sinking. _‘Don’t be stupid,’_ he told himself. _‘He left. He doesn’t ever want to talk to you again…’_  
  
Daisya glanced toward the window. He blinked, gaze catching something. “Hey, isn’t that…?”  
  
Kanda looked. At first, he wasn’t sure as to what Daisya was talking about, but then he saw it: a flash of gold as an orb fluttered down below around the main entrance of the castle.  
  
Recognition filled Kanda’s eyes. It was the beansprout’s golem.  
  
“What’s it doing here?” Daisya asked. “Shouldn’t it be with Allen and the others?”  
  
Kanda frowned. The golem zipped around, motions almost frantic as it started going to various windows. It moved so quickly that Kanda almost couldn’t keep track of where it was – not until it darted in front of the alcove window, beating against the glass wildly as Daisya and Kanda both jumping back in surprise.  
  
“The fuck?” Kanda unlatched the window panel, pushing it open.  
  
Timcanpy darted inside, speeding by the two of them. Daisya tried to grab it, but missed. “Get it!”  
  
They tried to catch it; the golem was fast though as it zigzagged through the stacks, turning around every corner as it navigated the library, down to the lower level and eventually through the doors.  
  
Kanda and Daisya ran, chasing it down. They nearly collided into several scholars, who scowled in annoyance as the exorcists hurried past, but neither of them cared. They were too intent on catching Timcanpy, darting outside into the main hallway-  
  
Both of them collided into Lavi, all three falling down. A stack of papers flew into the air, sheets spilling all over the ground – all documents Lavi had been carrying them. As he sat up, he scrambled to get him.  
  
“What the heck? What’s up with you two?” Lavi asked, as he spotted Daisya and Kanda getting up. “If you’re going to practice training, wait until you get to the actual training room and spare the pedestrians-“  
  
He cut off, as Timcanpy flew in front of him. Lavi’s eye widened. “Tim, what are you doing here!?”  
  
“We were trying to catch it,” Daisya said. “It came in all panicked for some reason-“  
  
“What?” Lavi got onto his legs and looked back at the golem. “Tim, where’s Allen? You’re supposed to be with him and the others on your way back to Liorea!”  
  
Timcanpy zipped around, wings flapping hysterically.  
  
Lavi frowned. “This isn’t right,” he said. “Tim wouldn’t have left Allen and something must have happened-“  
  
“Daisya!”  
  
The trio turned. Tiedoll rushed over, expression far more serious than normal. He stopped just before them, his attention focusing on Daisya in particular. “Daisya, I need you to come with me – there were several explosions on the main road passing through the forest just a short while ago.”  
  
“ _What_?” Lavi jumped in, mouth agape. “The one the Lioreans took!?”  
  
Kanda froze. His body turned numb, with anything else Lavi said having faded into the background. _‘Alma.’_  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “Yes. Marie will stay behind – the horses are ready.”  
  
Kanda snapped out of his trance, unease pumping through his veins. “I have to come.”  
  
Tiedoll turned back to him. He exhaled. “Kanda, you know you can’t-“  
  
“Look, I’ll do whatever you tell me to, okay?” Kanda’s words were heated, yet at the same time, strained. “Just let me come and I’ll step down from any exorcist shit after!”  
  
No one said anything, and Kanda knew he must have sounded half-out of his mind. It wasn’t like him to ask, more or less to _beg_ – and a part of him hated himself for sounding so pathetic. But he couldn’t stop himself. He couldn’t stop himself from thinking about what may have happened – what may have happened to _Alma_ -  
  
He just needed to know that Alma was okay.  
  
Tiedoll paused. He looked torn, and for a moment, Kanda feared that the general would stand his ground. However, he nodded. “Very well – but stay close and don’t do anything unless instructed to.”  
  
“Timcanpy can go with you,” Lavi said as he nudged toward the golem. “He belongs to Allen.”  
  
“Alright,” Tiedoll said, before urging Daisya and Kanda to follow. “This way – we have to hurry!”  
  
Kanda nodded. They left, all rushing to get outside to where the horses were, the fear of what may have happened never once leaving his mind.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Rain started to fall. It was light and not more than a drizzle, the droplets creating a mist as they plummeted onto the earth. The ground turned soft and damp, the rain gently pelleting onto the treetops of the forest.  
  
Allen exhaled. He looked around, his anti-akuma weapon still activated. The ground was a mess, the earth having been blasted with several attacks; branches had fallen, the ground uprooted and muddy. Soldiers looked around, taking care of the wreckage; the first carriage where the duke had remained had been spared, but the second carriage had been tipped over, the front wheels broken.  
  
Bookman walked up to Allen. “Any sign of it?”  
  
Allen frowned, and shook his head. “No,” he said, his left eye shifting into black and red once more. He glanced around. “It just…disappeared.”  
  
Bookman’s lips pursed. He glanced back toward the group. “Do a headcount. We need to make sure everyone is accounted for.” He looked back toward the first carriage. “Is Duke Legory alright?”  
  
The carriage door opened and Matthew stepped out first. “We’re alright-“  
  
“ _Hardly_.” Legory cut him off, voice sharp from the inside of the carriage. “Is the cursed thing gone?”  
  
“We’re checking now – stay inside until we make sure it’s safe,” Allen ordered, before glancing around. During the fight, he had struggled to keep track of everyone and realized he hadn’t checked on Alma. _‘Where-‘_  
  
The sound of horses racing caught his attention. Turning, Allen looked back as he saw Timcanpy flying toward them, a group Ilverian soldiers galloping in their direction. With them, several of the exorcists were present as well.  
  
They stopped, quickly jumping off their horses. Tiedoll was the first to approach, expression lined with urgency. “What happened?”  
  
Bookman huffed. “An akuma attack is what happened,” he said. “Came out of nowhere and ambushed us – two guards have been injured. The duke is still safe and we’ve asked him to stay in the carriage with his valet.”  
  
Tiedoll’s brow furrowed. “What happened to the akuma?”  
  
“We don’t know,” Allen said. “It just disappeared a few minutes ago – right before you guys got here.”  
  
A bit back, Kanda looked around. He had just gotten off his horse, his gaze intense as he scanned the wreckage. He saw the guards who had been injured, the carriage where the duke had been confined to-  
  
He didn’t see Alma anywhere.  
  
Daisya glanced over, immediately taking note of Kanda’s unease. “Hey, what’s wrong?”  
  
“He’s not here,” Kanda realized.  
  
“What? Who-“  
  
Kanda didn’t wait. Before anyone could stop him, he darted off into the forest, ignoring Daisya’s protests. He frantically looked around, the rainfall cool against his skin. “Alma!”  
  
No response came. He turned, looking in another direction. Kanda only saw trees though, the shadows endless and silent.  
  
Gradually, Kanda’s panic festered. Where was Alma? Shouldn’t he have been back where everyone else was? Kanda turned, looking in one direction. There were no signs of the stable boy and his jaw clenched.  
  
 _‘No,’_ he thought. No, Alma had to be okay – he had to be _somewhere._ He couldn’t have been gone. He couldn’t have been-  
  
“Alma!” Kanda shouted again as he tried to look for a sign – a hint. Anything to signify that Alma was okay. “Alma-!”  
  
He cut off, just as something glinted on the ground. He had almost missed it, but it was there: a thin golden bracelet, with a lotus charm. The one he had given Alma.  
Kanda picked it up, a heavy wave of nausea befalling him. He felt his heart drop into his stomach and looked around once more, desperation clasping at his core. “ _Alma_!”  
  
“Kanda!” Tiedoll shouted. He quickly caught up to Kanda. “Kanda, what are you doing out here!?”  
  
“He’s not here!” Kanda turned back to Tiedoll, expression distraught and agitated. “Something fucking happened to him and he’s missing!”  
  
“What? Who’s missing?” Tiedoll tried to keep calm as he took Kanda’s shoulder firmly. He had never seen the prince so distressed before. “They’re doing a headcount now and you can’t be out here-“  
  
“Alma _wasn’t there_!” Kanda argued, something in his chest _cracking_. “I looked and he wasn’t…!”  
  
He stopped, unable to finish speaking. His chest trembled as his lungs strained for air. Suddenly, it was difficult to breathe. “He wasn’t…”  
  
Tiedoll stared. He was somewhat startled at Kanda’s response. Gently, he squeezed Kanda’s shoulder, taking care to craft his response carefully. “Before we leave, we’ll scout the area for anyone,” he promised, voice steady. “But we have to move – we can’t stay out here.”  
  
Kanda’s fists balled. His shoulders shook, chest tight, the lotus bracelet still in his grasp. _‘Alma…’_  
  
Tiedoll’s expression remained firm, but sympathetic. “This way,” he said, urging Kanda to follow.  
  
Kanda didn’t move. The rain continued to fall, the air cold around him. Once more, he looked around, the heavy weight of reality settling in.  
  
Alma was gone. He was gone, and Kanda didn’t know if he would find him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn’t resist posting this chapter a bit earlier than planned. X3 
> 
> I mentioned it previously that this chapter is where the plot really kicks in. Before this point, it was a lot of buildup (especially with developing Kanda and Alma’s relationship), but now the real drama and angst are coming into play. I do want to note that following this chapter, it does get a bit heavy - but again, there’s also going to be payoff. (I did not suffer through writing this all to not have a happy ending - like, there WILL be a happy ending, damn it!)
> 
> Also, I’m hoping Kanda’s character seems...okay? I struggled a bit with him in this chapter since he has such a different upbringing in this role, and while he’s not someone who I see getting emotional in public, I felt like it wouldn’t have made sense for him to _not_ react badly to Alma going missing. Especially since he’s not a second exorcist in this fic and basically just...a normal person, minus any exorcist things.
> 
> I do have to admit that I really did rip off some of Swan Princess from. In one of my first versions of this AU, it was going to be based more off that film (which, ahaha, yes, means that originally I had Alma in the role of a prince from a neighboring kingdom as well but obviously that changed), but it evolved a lot. I did, however, want to work in a parallel to that dramatic scene in Swan Princess where Derek finds out Odette has gone missing after their carriages are attacked. Since Alma was given a jewelry piece as well, it was too good a parallel to pass up. :3
> 
> This does mean that there’s a Swan Lake “curse” element to kick in soon. I think it’s probably obvious the direction I’m going in with this (even if you’re not familiar with the Swan Lake storyline, I think it is? But maybe not XD). But ahaha, next chapter you’ll all know for sure. >:3
> 
> I hope you all liked this chapter. As always, any comments, feedback, and kudos are really appreciated! <3 (Give me more motivation to keep editing these chapters XD)


	13. Something Lost

They couldn’t find Alma.  
  
Kanda hadn’t wanted to leave the forest. He hadn’t wanted to accept that the search was a failed one and that his efforts had been in vain. There were no footprints, no torn pieces of clothing – the only thing Kanda had been able to find was the lotus bracelet, which felt far too fragile and delicate in his grasp. Like some sad little flower petal that threatened to shatter any second. Like something that needed to be protected at all costs.  
  
Eventually, they had to return to the castle. Kanda remained silent the whole way back, his cloak soaked from the rain. He hardly noticed, his expression distant and thoughts elsewhere. The bulk of their party had already gone on ahead, the guards having escorted the duke back to the castle. The exorcists had stayed behind to scout the area – even the beansprout.  
  
They didn’t exchange any words. Allen looked distraught, having also searched whatever area he could with Timcanpy in the hopes of finding Alma. Like Kanda, he had nothing to show for his efforts; Alma was just _gone_ , almost as though he had never even been there.  
  
Chest tight, Kanda gripped at the reins of his horse. He remained keenly aware of the bracelet that he had slipped into his pocket, the piece being the one reminder he now had of Alma. The one reminder that Alma _had_ been there.  
  
_‘What happened?’_ Kanda wanted to ask. _‘What happened to you?’_  
  
There was no one to answer him.  
  
By the time they reached the castle’s main entrance, several other guards greeted them. Kanda didn’t bother to acknowledge anyone. He remained completely cut-off from the others, not even aware if Daisya or Tiedoll were paying any mind to how he was acting. He didn’t have the capacity to care.  
  
They dismounted their horses, a few of the stable hands having come to guide the beasts back to their stalls. Kanda paused as one groom took his horse; his throat turned dry as he thought about Alma.  
  
Tiedoll turned to the other exorcists. “Everyone, go inside and get dried off,” he instructed.  
  
Daisya nodded. “Works for me,” he said, though his voice didn’t hold its usual, playful bite. His dark eyes flickered to Kanda and Allen before he headed up the stairs.  
  
Tiedoll turned to the other two. “You both as well – don’t stay out here,” he advised, tone gentle. “The last thing either of you need is to catch a cold.”  
  
Allen nodded, though he didn’t say anything. His eyes were tired, his white hair clinging to his face as several raindrops trickled down his cheeks.  
  
Tiedoll’s gaze shifted between them once more. He paused as he glanced at Kanda, a concerned gleam festering in his eyes. However, the general didn’t press as he turned, walking into the castle while the other two exorcists remained outside.  
  
As Tiedoll went in, Lavi passed him, nearly stumbling over his long legs as he rushed down the stairs. The rain fell and made the steps slippery, but he managed to keep his footing.  
  
“What happened?” he asked, as he hurried down the steps. “Are you guys okay? Gramps just got back with the duke, and said there was an akuma attack-“  
  
He cut off. The air was heavy and somber – even more so when Lavi took note of the expressions on both exorcists’ faces. Kanda bore a stormy look that wasn’t like his usual, irritable expression. And Allen looked…  
  
Lavi’s insides coiled uncomfortably. He chanced an uneasy glance toward Kanda before he focused on Allen. “Al, what happened?”  
  
Allen looked up. His gaze met Lavi’s, the corners of his mouth heavy and his words barely audible as he spoke. “We lost Alma.”  
  
Lavi’s eye widened. “What?”  
  
He didn’t get a chance to ask any more as Kanda briskly moved passed him. The prince didn’t dare slow down or look back, hurrying inside before he could risk hearing another word.  
  
_“We lost Alma.”_  
  
Kanda’s stomach knotted, bile threatening to rise in the back of his throat. His jaw clenched tightly as his fists remained balled, every muscle in his body tense as he fought the mounting level of pain in his chest. _‘Don’t…’_  
  
He made his way down the corridors, weaving past some of the castle servants as they took note of him, their gazes questioning and perplexed. Kanda ignored them; he already knew he must have looked like a complete mess, hair sopping wet and clothes soaked through. He didn’t give a damn, though, and hurriedly entered into the wing where the royal chambers were, intent on getting to his room before anyone could stop him.  
  
As Kanda made it to his destination, a few attendants took note of his arrival. A young valet spoke, gaze concerned. “Ah, Your Highness, do you need anything?”  
  
Kanda bypassed the valet, going into his room without even acknowledging the attendant. He forcefully slammed the door, his back pressing against the smooth wood, body numb and expression aloof. Soundlessly, he slunk down onto the ground, the silence of his bedroom pooling around him.  
  
Alma. Alma was…  
  
He inhaled sharply. Stupidly, Kanda attempted to talk himself out of his emotions. To rationalize what he was feeling.  
  
_‘Why him?’_ a voice asked, Kanda’s lungs constricting at the thought. _‘He wasn’t even an exorcist. He couldn’t_ defend himself _!’_  
  
His breaths turned shallow and Kanda swore he felt his heartbeat falter. He couldn’t stop thinking. He couldn’t stop thinking about _Alma_ – his smile, his laugh. The way his eyes lit up when he got excited, the way he played with his hair when he was being shy…  
  
Kanda couldn’t stop thinking about Alma and how he would never see him again. There was no way Alma could have survived an akuma attack.  
  
The realization was a knife into his chest – one that nearly killed him. He leaned forward, face buried into his knees as he tried to block out the overwhelming tidal wave of agony that washed over him. The regret and the grief. Alma had left earlier that day thinking that Kanda hadn’t actually cared about him and had only been stringing him along. Their last interaction had been nothing but heated words without the kindness of any closure, and _now_ …  
  
_‘Alma…’_  
  
Kanda couldn’t hold back his tears any longer.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Anita was at a loss. She sat on the throne, completely speechless after having just heard the account of what had taken place, Bookman quiet as he waited for her to speak. Legory was also with him – somewhat disheveled and displeased, but present nevertheless, his valet beside him.  
  
Nearby, Mahoja stood, also silent as she watched the conversation unfold.  
  
Finally, Anita spoke. “How many were injured?”  
  
“Two of the Liorean guards,” Bookman answered. “They were taken to the infirmary just now.”  
  
The doors pushed open, the group falling silent. Anita looked up as Tiedoll walked in, clothes damp from the rain and expression weary.  
  
Bookman spoke. “Glad to see you made it back.”  
  
Tiedoll approached the group. “We scouted what we could – we couldn’t determine the location of the akuma or where it went.”  
  
“So, it’s still out there?” Legory questioned. “The wretched thing nearly flipped the _carriages over_.”  
  
“Is everyone alright?” Anita looked at Tiedoll worriedly. “Did Yuu-?”  
  
“He’s safe,” Tiedoll reassured. The general paused, expression turning somber as he continued on.  
  
“Unfortunately, one person has gone missing.” Tiedoll turned to Legory, gaze apologetic. “We couldn’t find the stable boy who was serving you – Alma was his name, wasn’t it? We looked everywhere for him, but there wasn’t any sign of him. No one saw what happened to him, but it doesn’t seem hopeful.”  
  
Anita brought a hand up to her mouth. “That poor boy…”  
  
Mahoja stepped forward, a frown pulling at her lips. “Does he have any family back in Liorea?” she asked, tone leaden. “Someone will need to notify them about what happened.”  
  
Legory’s lips pressed into a thin line as he crossed his arms. “The boy had no family – his mother disappeared nine years ago, leaving him behind,” he said, tone somewhat cool. “There aren’t any personal connections who will need to be notified.”  
  
Anita nodded. “I see,” she said. “Our horse master will see that your horses are taken care of in the meantime – Jirou will be able to check them to make sure none of them sustained any injuries.”  
  
“We’ll have to wait until the guards have recovered,” Bookman said. “We can’t very well travel back to Liorea now.”  
  
“No, certainly not.” Anita returned her attention to Legory. “I understand this situation isn’t ideal – but we will be able to house you for as long as you need. In the meantime, our exorcists can look into the akuma activity.”  
  
Legory inhaled. “Very well,” he agreed. “I’d rather not be attacked again.”  
  
“Do you have any idea what may have spurned the akuma on?” Tiedoll asked.  
  
Legory threw up his hand, exasperated. “I can’t even say – the akuma didn’t even directly attack anyone at first. It just flew around!”  
  
Bookman frowned. “It did do that for a while…it didn’t seem to target anything specific. The attack felt mindless.” His lips pressed together into a tight line. “It doesn’t align with the patterns of the other attacks either, considering myself and Allen Walker were unharmed.”  
  
Anita’s expression remained pensive. The uncertainty in the room festered like an open wound, everyone’s unease palpable.  
  
“It’s been a strenuous day,” Anita finally spoke, before turning to Tiedoll. “When the storm passes, I’d like for the area to be searched again – if there’s any indicator of what may have spurned the attack, I’d like to know.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded.  
  
The conversation dissolved after that and a few attendants escorted the duke and his valet to a new room. Bookman also took leave, with only Tiedoll and Mahoja remaining.  
  
Before Tiedoll left, he turned to Anita. “If I may,” he started, gaze wary. “Kanda was…very distraught when we got to the scene of the attack. I think he may have known the stable boy.”  
  
Anita blinked, somewhat taken by surprise. “Did he say anything?”  
  
“Not specifically – but he was the first to realize the boy was missing and knew him by name,” Tiedoll explained. Somewhat heavily, he added, “Kanda didn’t want to leave when we couldn’t find him.”  
  
Anita sucked in a small breath, her gaze somber. “Thank you for letting me know.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded and took his leave.  
  
Mahoja stepped forward. She looked at Anita warily. “Are you alright?”  
  
Anita sighed. She shook her head. “I’m fine,” she spoke, words soft. “I’m just not sure what to do…”  
  
Mahoja frowned. “The CROWs will still be coming here soon,” she pointed out. “Between them and the exorcists, maybe we can find out something. Especially with both of the Bookmen staying.”  
  
Anita nodded in agreement. If anything, Mahoja had a point – once the CROWs were in Ilveria, they would be able to assist; and in the meantime, Bookman and Lavi would possibly be able to find out something. Anita hoped so, at least.  
  
She turned back to Mahoja. “I didn’t realize Yuu knew the stable boy,” she said, still somewhat surprised by the whole thing. “It must have been upsetting for him with what happened…”  
  
Mahoja looked at Anita questioningly. “Do you want to check on him?”  
  
Anita shook her head. “No – no, not now,” she said. “I think it’ll be better to give him some time.”  
  
Mahoja nodded. She glanced at the queen regent, a look of hesitancy darting across her face – almost as though she were tempted to say something.  
  
However, the guard remained quiet and didn’t say another word.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
“It’s _not_ your fault,” Lavi pressed. “You didn’t know what was happening and you couldn’t see everything going on!”  
  
Allen sighed. He took off his cloak, leaving it to hang on the back of one of the chairs in the guest room he had originally been given – one that it looked like he would be staying in for some time now. The room was modest, but generously sized with smooth, light gray walls. The furnishings consisted of a bed, a dresser, a desk, and a closet, all carved of oak. A large, east-facing window stretched high, the curtains pulled aside to reveal the overcast sky as rain softly pelleted the glass.  
  
“I was _there_ ,” Allen reiterated. His hand rested on the back of the chair, fingers clutching at the fabric of his cloak. “I was there and I should have _seen_ -“  
  
He cut off. The sentence was too painful to finish, Allen’s guilt mounting. Ever since the attack, he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Alma – Alma, who had been his friend. They had been friends and Allen hadn’t even been looking out for him. He hadn’t even seen when Alma had been taken, or _worse_.  
  
“Al.” Lavi walked over to Allen, his expression serious. “You can’t _blame_ yourself for this – you know how chaotic attacks get. It’s just not possible for you to keep an eye on everyone and account for who’s okay!”  
  
Allen didn’t meet Lavi’s gaze. His face remained forlorn, silvery eyes as heavy as his leaden heart. “I know you’re trying to make me feel better, but…” His words trailed off, muscles tight with tension. He gritted his teeth, unable to repress his own guilt. “I was there and I don’t even know what happened to him – I didn’t even hear if he shouted or _anything_!”  
  
As Allen broke, he once more thought back to the attack, the uncertainty of what had happened plaguing him. Had Alma screamed? Had his voice simply been drowned out by the guards and the chaos of what had taken place? When had he even disappeared? He had been there at first, back with the horses – but when the smoke cleared, and the akuma finally vanished…nothing. He was gone.  
  
Just gone.  
  
His insides curdled. Allen had known Alma ever since he had started working in the stables three years ago, but they hadn’t really connected as friends until the past year. By that point, they had started to grow closer, having discovered they had a lot in common; in many ways, Alma had quickly become one of Allen’s closest friends.  
  
And Allen had let him down. He hadn’t been there to help Alma.  
  
The silence of the room was heavy. Lavi couldn’t remember the last time he had seen Allen so upset, but he shouldn’t have expected anything else. At times, the exorcist was undeniably altruistic to the point of a fault. It was a quality that Lavi personally couldn’t relate to, his own emotional connections being more measured and controlled. Even his friendships and amiability only ran so deep – Bookman was always quick to remind him about it.  
  
With Allen, it was a little different. But Lavi didn’t like to think too much about that.  
  
Lavi took a breath, careful as he chose his words. “You didn’t hear what happened and apparently no one else did. It wasn’t just you,” he finally managed, tone strangely calm. “ _No one_ saw – which means that whatever happened probably wasn’t obvious. It’s one more reason you shouldn’t beat yourself up over this. It won’t bring Alma back.”  
  
Allen turned back to Lavi. His gaze was somewhat sharp and something almost searing flashed in his eyes – but Lavi beat him to the punch, speaking before he could get a word in.  
  
“I’m not saying it wasn’t a tragedy,” Lavi continued, voice soft. “I’m just saying it’s not one you were responsible for.”  
  
The gentleness in Lavi’s voice was unanticipated and Allen’s frustration was momentarily abated. He faltered, throat dry as Lavi’s words sank in, the sting of his loss refusing to dull.  
  
He knew that Lavi was right.  
  
Heavily, Allen exhaled. He felt defeated – more so than he had in a long time.  
  
Timcanpy remained on the desk. The golem hadn’t moved since they entered the room. It fluttered its wings as the pause stretched on, the faintest noise of ruffling crumbling the silence.  
  
Lavi leaned back against the wall. He looked off to the side, his attention drifting to the window. “What do you remember happening?” he asked quietly. “No one’s told me the whole story yet…”  
  
Allen tensed, the memories cutting through his mind like freshly sharpened blades. Still gripping the back of the chair, he turned it and took a seat. He leaned forward, his elbows resting heavily against his legs as he closed his eyes.  
  
“It was weird. It started with the horses – they wouldn’t go any farther for some reason.” Allen opened his eyes, his expression still distant as he recalled the events. “Alma tried to find out what was wrong, but he couldn’t figure it out.”  
  
Lavi’s one good eye shifted, his attention returning to Allen. “The horses also acted up when you guys came here, didn’t they?”  
  
Allen paused. Slowly, he nodded. “Yeah…yeah, they did. It was the same area now that I think about it.”  
  
Lavi’s frown deepened. “Makes me wonder if it has to do with that spot then,” he noted, filing away the tidbit. Warily, he pressed on. “What happened next?”  
  
Allen’s lips pursed. “The guards spotted something up ahead. I didn’t get a good look, but it almost looked like a person.” Somewhat gingerly, he brought his hand up to his left eye. “But when I looked at the stranger, my eye activated. It wasn’t an akuma, though, and we got attacked immediately after that.”  
  
Lavi remained quiet. His expression was pensive as he mused over what Allen had shared. “And it…just flew around attacking from random angles?” He brought his fingers to his chin, brow furrowing. “I know akuma aren’t exactly strategists, but something about this seems weird…”  
  
Allen didn’t comment. His gaze was still distant as he continued to replay the events over in his mind. He tried to think back – had he missed something? Who had been that stranger? They had been too far away, but they couldn’t have been an akuma – Allen would have been able to tell if they were.  
  
It didn’t matter now, though. Whoever they were, they had disappeared as quickly as the akuma had.  
  
“It just doesn’t feel right,” Allen spoke quietly. “It…I don’t know how to explain it. It didn’t feel like a random attack.”  
  
Lavi exhaled through his nose. While he agreed it was peculiar, he wasn’t swift to say such aloud – especially since a part of him couldn’t help but wonder how much weight Allen was adding to this due to what had happened with Alma. “Well, we can’t overlook anything. I still have to talk to Gramps about it,” he said. “Maybe he saw something no one else did.”  
  
Allen thought, his focus shifting to the window. His heart remained heavy, the attack having depleted him in more ways than one. Silently, he wondered about Alma – about what had happened, and if there was a _chance_ …  
  
“Yeah,” he finally agreed, voice barely audible. “Maybe.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The ground was cold and hard when he finally began to wake up.  
  
Alma groaned. His whole body ached, muscles stiff and sore as his ears pounded. He attempted to lift his head off the ground, but stopped as a grimace marred his face; his head felt terribly heavy and the side of his face was wet with rain and dirt.  
  
_‘Ugh.’_ Alma tried to wipe what he could as he rolled onto his side. His shoulder dug into the ground and he winced – he suddenly realized it was stone. Stone that was damp and covered in moss.  
  
_‘Where…?’_ Alma slowly blinked his eyes as he tried to adjust his vision. Wherever he was, it was dark. He couldn’t see well, the area foreign and unfamiliar. The walls around him were stone and eroded; moss and ivy tendrils blanketed the walls, the space worn with age. Alma was in what appeared to be a large room, his attention moving up. Vaulted stone ribbing loomed above.  
  
Gradually, panic swelled in Alma’s chest. Where was he? He tried to remember what happened, but he was drawing a blank. Slowly, he pushed himself up; his legs felt unnaturally wobbly, like a newborn foal that had yet to get its footing.  
  
A wave of dizziness overtook him. Vision spinning, he leaned against the wall and took a few deep breaths. He realized his clothes were damp, heavy, and uncomfortable. He shifted uneasily, the weight of his cloak tugging on his shoulders. The air around him was cool, though, and Alma hesitated to take it off.  
  
_‘What happened? I don’t…’_ Alma bit his lip as he tried to think. He remembered…getting the horses ready that morning. Because they were finally leaving Ilveria. They were finally leaving and had started through the woods, but they had stopped. They had stopped, because the horses hadn’t wanted to go any farther-  
  
_…An attack. An attack blasted from the side, smoke and debris clouding the air around them…  
  
…Alma tried to keep his horse calm. He tried to ease her, but she kicked back, Alma falling onto the ground. And there was a black butterfly…  
  
…Someone. Someone grabbed him from behind, yanking him away from the others. Alma tried to shout – he tried to scream. But his mouth was covered, and he couldn’t _breathe _…  
  
_He inhaled sharply, the memories rushing back to him. An attack. The traveling party had been attacked by something – an _akuma_. But Alma didn’t know what happened. Someone had grabbed him and he had lost consciousness, but who? _Who_ had taken him?  
  
Slowly, Alma’s breaths turned shallow. His panic returned as he struggled to keep calm. He needed to remember to breathe – he needed to _get out of there_.  
  
Glancing around, Alma saw no signs of anyone. Up ahead, he caught sight of an exit. There was an entryway of stone, the ceiling falling apart in some areas and the light dim.  
  
Alma hurried to the exit, ignoring the way his legs threatened to buckle beneath him. He pressed against the edge of the entry way as he looked around anxiously, taking in the scenery as he tried to determine where he was.  
  
It was dark out – not quite nightfall, but it must have been close. The sky was a deep charcoal gray; the rain had stopped, the earth wet with droplets and puddles. An array of wildflowers spread out across the grass, some even blossoming on the outside of the ruins he had been in.  
  
Alma stepped out into the open air and down the stone steps, glancing back at the structure. The ruins looked like they had once been a small castle, though now long abandoned and forgotten. His stomach twisted in unease. Alma didn’t know why he’d been brought here or what part of the forest he was in. A large lake spread out beside the ruins, the surface so placid it resembled glass.  
  
_‘None of this is familiar,’_ he realized, as he looked in another direction. He didn’t recall this lake, but he knew it was in the forest somewhere. In the distance he saw mountains, but were those the same he had been able to see when in Ilveria?  
  
His head pounded. Alma grasped his scalp, shutting his eyes as he took several deep breaths. He must have hit his head or something – his entire body ached, but he couldn’t spare time to rest. He had to leave. He had to find someone.  
  
_Snap._  
  
Alma looked up, startled by the noise. Was someone near? He looked around, but saw no one; only trees and shadows and a silent lake…  
  
He felt like he was being watched.  
  
Like a dam breaking, a flood of something cold and alarming washed over him: fear, with its icy hands, clutching at his heart and squeezing it tight. It suffocated him slowly, his blood chilling as though kissed by frost, something frigid seeping into his veins.  
  
Without another thought, Alma turned and ran.  
  
He wasn’t sure what he was running from or why. But Alma knew he had to go – he had to run and he had to get away. His body ached and his legs burned, but he ignored it. He ran away from the lake and from the ruins, going deeper into the forest as he tried to navigate his way through the trees.  
  
A path. A road. If Alma could find something, then maybe he could find his way to a town or a village. Maybe he’d be able to find his way back to the Ilverian city-  
  
His foot caught onto a tree root and he stumbled. Alma caught himself, grasping at the bark of another tree as he caught his breath.  
  
_‘Keep going,’_ he told himself. _‘Just keep going!’_  
  
Sucking in another breath, Alma started to run-  
  
Something whizzed through the air, striking Alma’s sleeve as it pinned him to a tree. He turned back, eyes wide as he looked at what had struck him.  
  
A candle. It was a cone-shaped candle with black stripes, the flame lit at the wide end while the pointed tip had wedged itself into the tree bark.  
  
It was bizarre, but Alma didn’t even have time to ponder its oddness; he tugged at the candle in an attempt to yank it out, but it wouldn’t budge. He bit his lip as he struggled, but the candle felt strange – like it was made of iron rather than wax. _‘Why won’t it-‘_  
  
Someone giggled, Alma’s thoughts drawing to a halt. Confused, he looked up and spied a young girl several feet away. She was petite with short, dark hair and a white, feathery dress. Her amber eyes glowed in the darkness.  
  
She smiled at Alma, expression anything but friendly. “You look nervous,” she mused. “You’re not afraid of that candle, are you?”  
  
The words were teasing and Alma tensed. He swallowed. “Who are you?” he asked, words shaking. “What is this? Let me go!”  
  
“So demanding.” Another giggle spilled from her lips, eyes glinting with amusement. “It’s almost adorable how tough you’re trying to sound – especially when I can see how _terrified_ you are.”  
  
Alma didn’t get a chance to speak. In the blink of an eye, the girl was suddenly before him, eyes intensely peering into his own. Alarmed, Alma realized that she wasn’t even on the ground – she was _levitating_.  
  
_‘Magic?’_ Alma tried to rationalize the events, but his mind was faltering. CROWs knew magic and some guards and members of the Black Order in Liorea, but it wasn’t exactly _common_.  
  
“My name’s Road,” she said as she tilted her head to the side. “And you’re Alma.”  
  
Alma’s blood turned cold, his stomach dropping. He shivered as he dully remained aware of the candle that had trapped his arm to the tree, but was unable to look away from Road’s unyielding stare. “How do you know my name?”  
  
She hummed. “Wisely might have told me.” Road grinned, leaning in close as she whispered into his ear. “He’s told me a few other things about you too. Like how there’s this _hatred_ deep inside of you…”  
  
Alma tensed. “You don’t know anything about me! Y-you’re crazy!”  
  
Road laughed. She moved back, stepping back onto the earth gently. “Aw, you seem so sweet – I was surprised you were the one Tyki brought back.” In the darkness, a candle manifested beside her, the pointed tip sharp and gleaming. “But I’ve been getting a little bored and it’s so nice to finally have something to play with…”  
  
Alarm coursed through Alma. He yanked his arm back, tearing the sleeve of his shirt and pulling free from the candle before breaking out into a run. “Stay away from me!”  
  
Road turned, watching as he darted off. She smirked, several more candles appearing in the air. “Oh, I _love_ playing chase.”  
  
Alma ran, heart pounding as he pushed himself to move as swiftly as possible. He zig-zagged through the trees, trying to get away-  
  
A candle zipped past him, nearly striking his arm.  
  
Alma turned and regretted his decision immediately. Several more candles – all sharp and cone shaped – followed him.  
  
Panic flared through him as he struggled to think clearly. His attention shifted before he made a split-second decision, dodging behind a tree. The candles whizzed past and Alma took his chance to run in a different direction-  
  
Something _flashed._ Alma’s eyes widened as a blast of dark energy stopped him in his tracks. It sparked with violet electricity, a series of inky flames trapping him in place.  
  
Alma stumbled backward, completely in shock. _‘Wh-what’s that!?’_  
  
Someone grabbed his arm, their hand far too large and strong to have been Road’s. “Let me go!”   
  
His captor chuckled, voice low and deep. “Running off without saying goodbye? That’s rude.”  
  
Alma was yanked backwards, the force so powerful that he nearly lost his footing. He felt the wind knocked from him as he was shoved against a tree, vision spotting from the impact. He blinked, vision returning to focus as he looked up, catching sight of his captor.  
  
Alma stilled as soon as he recognized him.  
  
The stranger smiled. It was the man he had run into that day in the Ilverian city when he was with Kanda.  
  
Alma stared, almost too stunned to speak. “You-“  
  
“Remember me?” The stranger’s amber eyes glinted with amusement as he smirked at Alma. “We never were properly introduced. Name’s Tyki.”  
  
Alma tried to pull away. “Let me go,” he repeated, attempting to fight the way his voice tremored.  
  
Tyki’s grin broadened. “And let you run off and get lost? Sorry – can’t do that.”  
  
Alma struggled regardless of Tyki’s words, but his efforts were in vain. All too easily, Tyki tugged Alma along, grabbing him roughly from behind so that he couldn’t escape.  
  
“Road,” Tyki called as he forced Alma out from behind the trees. “Were you torturing him already? I told you to be gentle.”  
  
Road rolled her eyes, several candles hovering around her. She waved her hands and they disappeared. “I was just playing a game – I wasn’t going to actually hurt him.”  
  
Tyki scoffed. “Somehow, I find that hard to believe,” he said before he looked at Alma. He grinned. “Better get you back to the lake.”  
  
Alma looked back, momentarily freezing as he caught sight of Tyki’s glowing eyes. He didn’t say anything, his heart thudding in his chest rapidly. Silently, he tried to think – he had to get away from these people. Whoever they were. _Whatever_ they were. _‘I have to escape somehow-‘_  
  
Tyki tugged him roughly and his thoughts drew to a halt. Alma’s head spun from the force used, dizziness stubbornly clinging to him. He sucked in a breath as he tried to fight the nausea he felt, but doing so caused him to be annoyingly compliant as Tyki jerked him along, the flames evaporating behind them as Road followed in tow.  
  
They stopped as they reached the clearing, back near where the lake and the ruins. Tyki never once let go of Alma’s arm, his grip like iron; it was unyielding and Alma grimaced at the pressure.  
  
“Hey – Wisely,” Tyki called. “You were supposed to be watching him.”  
  
Alma blinked, as he watched someone walk out from the other side of the ruins – a young man with platinum blonde hair who bore a strange resemblance to Tyki. He had the same dark skin tone, the same amber eyes…  
  
Alma paled. He had a third eye as well.  
  
Wisely shrugged, expression bored. “I’m not a guard dog – I was _busy_.” His words were bored and tired – even bordering on apathetic. “Anyways, I don’t know why you’re worried. _You_ had no trouble catching him. Or Road.”  
  
Road giggled. “I had fun. It was definitely more entertaining than watching you _meditate_. It’s so boring.”  
  
Wisely huffed. He approached Alma and tilted his head to the side, his gaze turning scrutinous. “Are you sure about this one, Tyki?” He tugged a strand of Alma’s hair. “Even with what I’ve seen in him, I’m worried you missed the mark. There was an exorcist in that traveling party, wasn’t there? You should have taken him.”  
  
Alma blinked, eyes pooling with confusion. _‘Allen?’_  
  
Tyki chuckled lowly. “There was.” He lowered his face close to the side of Alma’s, smirk broadening. “But I already told you: the tease chose him. And I think he’ll be much easier to control than an exorcist. You know how unstable they get.”  
  
The words sent a shiver down Alma’s spine, almost as though something cold and slimy were crawling up his back. He bit his lip, angling his face away from Tyki. He didn’t know what they were talking about and he didn’t understand what was going on – but he was afraid.  
  
Alma swallowed. “What do you want?” he asked. He then recalled the others in the traveling party and his insides knotted up. “Where is everyone else?”  
  
“Don’t worry – none of them died,” Tyki answered. “Not that they’re much of your concern anymore.”  
  
Wisely continued to observe Alma, expression thoughtful. Completely ignoring Alma’s questions, he spoke to Tyki. “I guess he’ll do.” A smile tugged at his lips. “If anything goes wrong, Road and I can just blame you.”  
  
Alma’s confusion festered. None of these strangers were making any sense and the whole situation was unsettling – Alma didn’t even know what had happened after the akuma attack or where anyone else was.  
  
“Why am I here?” Alma asked again, his agitation spilling forth frantically. “What do you want with me!?”  
  
Road laughed, voice light and bell-like as she leaned against the wall of the ruins. “Someone’s getting paranoid. Maybe we should fill him in. Otherwise, he might try to run away again.”  
  
Tyki grinned. He leaned in close again, his voice low as he spoke into Alma’s ear. “We’ve been looking for another helper for a while. You should be flattered that the tease chose you.” He paused, taking note of the way Alma tensed as he held him in place. “I’m a little surprised, though – I had suspected the exorcist to be the one it wanted. But you have that much darkness inside, don’t you?”  
  
Alma remained stiff, Tyki’s words crawling across his skin like a thousand little spiders. He shuddered. “You’re not making any sense.”  
  
“I think you know perfectly well what I’m talking about. But I think you’re just too afraid to admit it.” Tyki’s voice remained quiet, smooth and cutting as ice. “You won’t be able to ignore it for much longer. Once that dark matter is in your blood, you’ll make for nice little akuma.”  
  
Alma’s face blanched, his heart dropping into his stomach like a stone plummeting into water. He fought against Tyki’s grip, anxiety returning full force as he thrashed in an attempt to break free. “You’re insane! Let me _go-_!”  
  
Tyki abruptly released Alma, causing the stable boy to stagger as he came close to falling. Almost immediately, Alma backed away, clutching at the clasp of his cloak, gaze still wide.  
  
“Don’t bother trying to run. It’s not as though you’re going to get very far,” Wisely said, before turning to Tyki and Road. “Someone, do it. Or else he’s going to try to run off again and I’m not wasting my energy chasing him down.”  
  
“Fine.” Tyki waved his hand, a wisp of black smoke manifesting into a black butterfly.  
  
Alma’s attention fixated on it, the hairs on the back of his neck rising. He glanced around his surroundings. If there was a way he could just get _out-_  
  
Something cold passed behind him. Alma froze as a delicate pair of hands gripped his shoulders, the touch as frigid as ice. He looked back and immediately spotted Road – how had she moved so quickly? “What are you-“  
  
“Don’t be scared.” She smiled at him, her face far too close for comfort. “It’ll be quick.”  
  
A flash of movement flickered in his peripheral and Alma turned forward, Tyki standing in front of him. “Hold still,” he said, as he snatched the butterfly from the air.  
  
Alma watched in horror as Tyki thrusted the creature into his chest.  
  
Alma’s pupils constricted, the wings of the butterfly cutting into him like blades. Fire blossomed in his veins as though his blood had been turned to acid, pain searing throughout every inch of his body. It felt as though his very bones were twisting; his eyes watered, breaths shallow as he tried to _breathe_.  
  
His screamed, collapsing to the ground as his body withered. It _hurt_ – his muscles twitched as though they were tearing apart. His lungs constricted with each breath, burning and desperate for oxygen.  
  
Everything went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know a few people have asked if I was going to have Alma turn into a swan, since that’s the curse in Swan Lake - but why have him be a swan when I can really make things painful and turn him into an akuma instead? XD (I know, I’m cruel - you can probably see where this story is going to start to hurt.) 
> 
> I did teeter with it in one of the earlier versions (I mean, it was hard not to - thinking of Alma getting turned into a pretty swan is cute tbh), but having the curse tying to dark matter made much more sense when this plot was revised. Hopefully, that’ll be more apparent as the rest of the chapters are shared.
> 
> This was definitely a heavier chapter, and to be honest, there’s only more to come. Kanda has a lot of guilt over what’s taken place (even more so now that he thinks Alma didn’t survive) and Allen isn’t in much better shape, either. Meanwhile, we’ll have to see what happens to Alma when he regains consciousness. ;__;
> 
> I hope that regardless of the suffering, you all enjoyed this chapter. I wanted to get something up this week, and couldn’t sleep (I have a very loud neighbor above me and it’s 1:36AM and I am very annoyed XD), so I figured I’d get this posted while I can. As for when the next update comes, I’m on the fence. My schedule has gotten sort of off, so I’ll update when I can/based on how badly people want them? Time isn’t real anymore. I can’t keep track of it. XD 
> 
> This week a lot of winter holidays kicked off as well, so happy holidays to those who are celebrating! :3
> 
> Kudos/comments appreciated as always. <3


	14. Weight of Guilt

_He was in the forest and it was dark.  
  
Kanda wasn’t sure what he was doing there. It must have been nighttime, the sky above inky and the shadows black. Fog clung to the earth, low as it seeped across the dew-encrusted wildflowers like a ghostly shroud.  
  
He looked around. A frown lingered on his face, gaze perplexed. He didn’t remember how he ended up in the forest – he didn’t see Tiedoll or Marie. Had he come alone? Had someone come with him? He didn’t know, but there was no one else in sight.  
  
Something loomed in the back of his mind – a distant thought that he couldn’t quite recall. It was frustrating; there was a reason Kanda was in the forest, but he couldn’t remember.  
  
Was he looking for something?  
  
The realization struck a chord of familiarity, like a signal rippling throughout his senses. Abruptly, Kanda turned. His gaze searched the area, a sudden wave of desperation befalling him.  
  
Someone. He was looking for someone.  
  
He turned and chose a random direction. Without thinking, Kanda ran. He ran through the forest, looking through the trees and the shadows. He wasn’t sure what exactly he was looking for – a hint. A sign. Something to lead him to them – to _that person _.  
  
He had to find them.  
  
Kanda looked on, stopping briefly as he glanced around. The forest went on endlessly, the shadows melting into an abyss of darkness. The air remained cold, the fog icy against his skin. Everything was so still and so _silent _…  
  
Kanda tried to think of them – of their face, their voice. Very distantly, he thought he could recall their laughter, but it was muddled. Their image had dissolved into a blur, his memories having failed to keep that person safe. Kanda’s jaw tightened in frustration; why couldn’t he _remember _them?  
  
_ ‘Shut up,’ _he told himself._ ‘Shut up and keep looking!’ _  
  
He forced himself to move, his desperation festering like an untreated wound. It was almost maddening; an obsessive need had overtaken him, refusing to allow him any peace. He couldn’t take it. He couldn’t take not_ knowing _-  
  
_ ‘Where are you?’ _  
  
Inside, something cracked. A fracture that wove into his heart, threatening to break it apart at the smallest impact. The pain was unbearable; Kanda couldn’t remember ever feeling such a way. It was as though a knife had been driven into his chest, ripping out a piece of something he couldn’t recover. That he couldn’t remember._ ‘Where…’ _  
  
He slowed to a stop, his panicked running having brought him to a clearing. The dense forest cleared, a lake in sight; Kanda saw the surface of the water gleam in the darkness. Several flowers floated silently on it – lotuses, he realized. The blossoms were still, their reflections mirroring them perfectly.  
  
Warily, Kanda stepped out from the forest. He looked around, the area unfamiliar.  
  
He froze.  
  
Someone was by the lake. They were still, sitting along the edge of the water, their attention focused on the surface. Although they were facing away, they were close enough that Kanda could slowly make out their appearance, the familiarity trickling into the forefront of his mind.  
  
Kanda’s breath hitched as soon as he recognized them – _that _person. “Alma!”  
  
Alma turned, his eyes bright through the darkness. He smiled as soon as he saw Kanda. “Yuu!”  
  
His voice was sweet and Kanda’s heart skipped. Alma had never called him by his first name before – he regretted not having ever told Alma it sooner.  
  
Alma’s smile remained, words warm as he spoke. “I found lotuses – you should come look at them with me!”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He was unable to refuse the invitation, the relief of simply _seeing _Alma overwhelming. More than anything, Kanda wanted to just run to Alma and hold him – to keep him safe in his arms forever and take him back to Ilveria.  
  
He never wanted to lose Alma again.  
  
He took a step forward. Kanda was just so _relieved _-  
  
Something moved in the lake.  
  
Kanda stiffened. It was dark and inky – like plant tendrils. They slithered out from the water quickly, curling as they wrapped around Alma’s waist-  
  
Kanda shouted, but it was too late. “Alma, get away from there!”  
  
Alma turned, eyes wide as he tried to scramble onto his feet to get away. The vines had already grabbed him, though, keeping Alma on the ground as they dragged him back toward the water.  
  
Alma looked back, eyes wide and pleading. “Yuu, help me!”  
  
His cry was enough to snap Kanda out of his trance. The prince bolted, running to Alma as he grabbed his hands, just as Alma had been half-pulled into the lake.  
  
The vines pulled harder, causing Kanda to fall onto his stomach. He tried to anchor himself as he held onto Alma’s hands. His jaw clenched as he kept his grip tight, adrenaline pumping in his veins.  
  
Kanda looked up, meeting Alma’s gaze. “I won’t let go-“  
  
His words cut off. When he looked back, he had expected to see Alma’s eyes. He had expected to see Alma’s face. But it wasn’t Alma anymore.  
  
It looked like Alma. It almost had his face shape and his hair, but its skin was too pale and its limbs long and knobby. Soft hands were now sharp claws, and its eyes were red: a hideous, ghastly red that made Kanda’s insides twist up into a tight ball, stunning him into shock.  
  
Before Kanda could react, it yanked him forward, the akuma whispering into Kanda’s ear. Horrified, he recognized Alma’s voice. “I hate you,” it spoke. “And I’ll _never _forgive you.”  
  
Swiftly, the akuma readied its claws and stabbed him.  
  
  
_

* * *

  
  
Kanda gasped as he shot upright in bed, eyes wide and cold beads of sweat dripping down his skin. The strands of his long, loose hair tangled and stuck to his back. Blood pounded in his ears, his heartbeat thundering in his chest; Kanda almost couldn’t breathe at first, the adrenaline in his veins too overpowering. He couldn’t remember where he was or what had happened-  
  
He blinked, his vision adjusting to the darkness. His room. He was in his bedroom.  
  
Heavily, Kanda exhaled. He recognized the familiarity of his surroundings, though his heartbeat continued to race.  
  
In, out, in, out – he forced himself to take more even breaths until he could calm down, his thoughts a disoriented jumble of broken memories. He couldn’t even remember what he had dreamed at first. The images were slipping away quickly, leaving nothing but a fog of unease in his mind…  
  
 _“I hate you.”_  
  
Kanda tensed, the words cutting into his consciousness sharply. Gradually, the images from the dream began to spill into his thoughts. The forest. The lake. Alma.  
  
 _“I’ll_ never _forgive you.”_  
  
His breaths turned shallow and he brought his hand to his face. He leaned forward as he tried to steady himself, the nightmare having left him dizzy.  
  
Kanda tried to erase the images from his mind. He looked to the side, the silvery moonlight spilling through the window and onto the nightstand beside Kanda’s bed. On it, the lotus bracelet remained.  
  
He stared at it. He didn’t know how long for, but Kanda stared, his heart aching as he looked at the lotus charm, chest hollow.  
  
Defeat weighing on his shoulders, Kanda forced himself to lie back down. He somehow felt simultaneously numb and restless, burnt to nothing and pushed to exhaustion. Yet his muscles twitched and he couldn’t _relax_ …  
  
Eventually, he fell back into a restless sleep.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Allen awoke at sunrise. He didn’t feel rested, but he hadn’t been able to lull himself back into slumber; his mind was too alert, his muscles too twitchy. Allen wasn’t sure who else would be up at such an hour save for the servants in the castle; the wing he was staying in was eerily quiet, being farther away from the servants’ quarters.  
  
Still – Allen speculated one person may have been up.  
  
He left his room, Timcanpy nestled onto his pillow. Allen didn’t bother to wake up the golem and shut the door quietly behind him.  
  
As he anticipated, only some of the servants were awake. Maidservants pulled back the curtains to let the light in, attendants cleaned and made sure everything in the castle was situated. A few scullions hurried to sweep out the fireplaces in the various rooms, scurrying around like mice as they rushed to finish their work. Allen glanced at a few as they left one study and entered into another, their expressions focused on their tasks.  
  
Allen didn’t linger. He never liked to hover around others.  
  
He eventually made his way to the library. The heavy wooden doors were closed, but unlocked. Allen pushed a door open as it creaked lowly, the sound strangely loud in his ears.  
  
The library was silent. Allen didn’t see anyone, except for two scholars at a nearby desk; both had fallen asleep, going through what appeared to be several texts. Allen was careful not to cause too much noise as he avoided them, making it way for the spiral staircase that led to the second level and ascended the steps.  
  
He wandered through the stacks, light beginning to spill through the tall, fogged windows. A warm, golden glow cast down the aisles, melding into the shadows; Allen paused, his gaze turning toward the light, the windows warm. The last three days had been cool and dark, rain gently falling from the sky. It seemed the sun had finally returned.  
  
Allen exhaled. Three days. It had been three days since the attack.  
  
The realization left Allen feeling empty. He wasn’t sure how else to describe it; the first day, his emotions had been threateningly volatile and he had barely been able to keep himself contained. He had always tried so hard to at least keep something of a mask. It wasn’t ideal, but Allen had to – he had to or else he’d lose focus.  
  
Focus was very difficult to maintain lately, though. Especially when one of his friends was supposedly dead.  
  
 _‘Not dead.’_ Allen shook his head, a frown on his face as his chest tightened with denial. _‘Missing. He’s_ missing _.’_  
  
Sucking in a breath, Allen continued. He passed a few more aisles, glancing down each one – and eventually, he found who he was looking for.  
  
Lavi was awake. He was in one of the aisles, having climbed a ladder while carefully perching himself on it to read. He looked engrossed in whatever text he had discovered. His red hair was in a disarray as a hint of sleepiness and wear lingered beneath his one good eye, a thoughtful frown on his face.  
  
Allen’s lips quirked upward at the sight. He approached Lavi, careful not to startle him. “Did you even try to go to sleep?”  
  
“Huh?” Lavi looked up from his book, somewhat taken by surprise despite Allen’s care. He blinked as he looked at the window behind Allen, the morning sun’s rays luminous. He raised a hand above his brow. “Oh. Guess I did forget to sleep.”  
  
Lavi slid down the ladder, the impact hitting his feet a bit harder than he anticipated. He fought a wince, but recovered, looking at Allen curiously. “You’re up early.”  
  
Allen shrugged. “I couldn’t go back to sleep. It made more sense to go ahead and get up.” He paused, his gaze flickering to the small book in Lavi’s grasp. “What were you reading?”  
  
“This?” Lavi flipped through the pages, the edges frayed and yellow. “It’s actually about akuma. Kind of was surprised to find it…to be honest, I almost missed it entirely. It was hidden back away from everything.”  
  
Allen’s brow rose. “Is it an older book?”  
  
“Looks like it.” Lavi leaned against the bookshelf as he flipped through the pages. “I mean, it sort of says what we already have known about akuma, but it actually has some theories. Looks like it was a scholar’s journal.”  
  
“What does it say?” Allen asked. He lowered his voice, the quiet of the library heavy around them. “I mean…are the theories anything we haven’t heard before?”  
  
Lavi paused. His expression remained sober, a small frown tugging at his lips. “Well,” he started, as he glanced through a few more pages. “Akuma have been around for as long as anyone can remember. That’s not new. They’re created by some kind of dark matter.”  
  
“Right…” Allen also leaned against the stacks, the information already being what he was familiar with. “That dark matter…it infects the dead.”  
  
The air was quiet between them. Lavi didn’t say anything as his green eye shifted, his gaze resting on Allen intently.  
  
“You know it’s true. Even if it’s not talked about often,” Allen went on, words quiet. “Back in Liorea, the Order has always known that. It’s why exorcists are typically cut off from their families unless they’re nobility.”  
  
Lavi exhaled. The weight in Allen’s words were palpable and it was a heaviness that Lavi was all too familiar with. “It’s not a secret, but it’s still only a speculation,” Lavi pointed out. His words were strangely calm and even. “We don’t entirely know how the dead are intertwined into this…but only that it’s the basis for that darkness. The Order won’t take any chances where exorcists are involved.”  
  
Allen sighed, the sound tired. “It’s not speculation anymore,” he argued, though his words remained soft. “I…I’ve _seen_ …”  
  
He trailed off. His heart felt like lead as he spoke and his left arm twitched. Before Allen could stop himself, he brought his hand to the left side of his face. “This eye…when it detects akuma, it’s like I see something else. There’s so much _suffering_.” His voice grew less audible, to where it was close to a whisper. “I swear, it’s like they’re human. Human souls _trapped_ …”  
  
Lavi’s expression remained neutral, almost detached. He had a way of keeping himself eerily composed during times such as this; it was in his nature as a Bookman. To keep calm, to rationalize. Even if he didn’t always act like it, Lavi always had a job to do.  
  
Right now, he struggled.  
  
Lavi took a small breath. “I’ll never see what that eye of yours does,” he acknowledged. “But we can’t ever really know. Even this book talks about that.”  
  
He paused, as he glanced back at the text once more. His voice was wary as he spoke. “The scholar who wrote this must have been around a century ago. He speculates that akumas are somehow driven by emotions, but that correlation isn’t clear. If anything, it’s a hint. Maybe to how they work.” Lavi frowned, as he crossed his arms. “One of the akuma last seen here…it did speak. It asked to be killed.”  
  
Allen looked up, somewhat sharply. “It spoke?”  
  
Lavi nodded. “Yeah. Kanda and the other exorcists dealt with it. That was several weeks ago. I mean, it’s not impossible for an akuma to evolve to where it can speak, but asking to be put out of its misery? I don’t know.”  
  
Allen’s frown remained. His expression had turned distant, his thoughts threatening to wander. “Do you think more of them can speak?” he asked quietly. “Because if they can-“  
  
“Al.” Lavi turned to Allen, voice growing serious. He frowned. “If you’re thinking of trying to find one to ask about what happened…don’t. You know that even if you did, the chances of it telling you anything are unlikely.”  
  
Allen closed his mouth. He broke eye contact and exhaled softly.  
  
Lavi didn’t say anything at first. The air around them was almost strained, heavy and weighed down. Already, Lavi knew what Allen must have been thinking – the last three days had been difficult for him and he likely hadn’t once been able to stop thinking about Alma.  
  
Lavi uncrossed his arms. “You haven’t been able to sleep because you still feel like shit, huh? Come on – don’t do that to yourself.” His words were measured, yet spoken softer than he normally allowed himself to, his gaze imploring. “He’s…he’s gone, Allen. I know he was your friend, but…we know Alma isn’t coming back. There’s no way.”  
  
Allen’s shoulders slumped, a look of defeat befalling him. It was devastating to think that Lavi was right – that Alma was gone and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Really, it only made sense; after all, how many other times had Allen seen others lost to akuma attacks? Maybe he wasn’t as close with them, but how often were there ever survivors? The easy answer was never.  
  
Allen just hated to admit it.  
  
“Sorry,” Allen finally managed. “I guess I’m just angry with myself, you know? Being there and not even seeing what happened.”  
  
“It wasn’t your fault,” Lavi reiterated. “I know it seems insensitive, but the only way you can do anything is to keep doing what you’re doing. Even if Alma isn’t here, you can still do that for him.”  
  
Allen nodded. Lavi was right. Even if Alma was gone, Allen had to keep going. He had to keep walking. Stagnancy would help no one.  
  
Lavi looked at Allen, the warmth of the sunlight spilling down the aisle. For a moment, he was distracted by the way the light glowed in Allen’s silvery locks, his pale skin painted a warm hue in the light. For a moment, he felt his façade crack, his heart suddenly beating a little too quickly.  
  
Very gingerly, Lavi’s hand brushed against Allen’s. “It’ll be okay, Al. You’ll get through this.”  
  
Allen looked up, his gaze meeting Lavi’s. The faintest twinge of surprise gleamed in his eyes. However, his hand also brushed against Lavi’s, his muscles slowly relaxing.  
  
Lavi stared a moment longer before he pulled back.  
  
“Ah.” Lavi fumbled with his words, heart still racing stubbornly. “I should probably try to sleep actually…I’m sure Gramps will be up soon. Maybe I can get an hour or two if I’m lucky.”  
  
Allen blinked, once more caught off guard. The air around them had turned strange – not quite strained, yet not as comfortable as it had been. “Right,” he said, before collecting himself. He smiled at Lavi. “Thanks. For talking to me.”  
  
Lavi nodded as he struggled to speak. “Yeah. Anytime,” he said. _‘Anytime…’_  
  
Allen smiled. “I’ll let you wrap up here,” he said. “See you around.”  
  
Lavi nodded. He watched as Allen turned, exiting the aisle before he soon disappeared into the stacks. Eventually, his footsteps also faded and Lavi was alone once more. He released a breath and leaned back against the bookshelf, his heart finally calming in his chest.  
  
In an attempt to distract himself, he looked back at the book. Carefully, he flipped through some pages, the words old and faded. _‘Grief…’_  
  
Sighing, he closed the book. Lavi had had enough reading for the night.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda was exhausted. He hadn’t been able to sleep at all during the night, his slumber plagued with nightmarish visions and images. Every time he closed his eyes, he was overcome with darkness: a cold, unsettling darkness that seeped into his core, refusing to let him have a single moment of peace. It kept him alert, his body never fully daring to relax. He was just so on _edge_.  
  
Kanda hadn’t had nightmares in a long time.  
  
He couldn’t remember them clearly – he never could. Everything was always a fog by the time he returned to full coherency. He only remembered distorted bits and pieces, his recollection faulted to where he could only really recall how he felt. Fear. Panic. _Loss_.  
  
He knew his dreams had been about Alma. He knew that much.  
  
Desperately, Kanda tried not to think about it. He buried any thoughts of Alma as he headed toward the training room.  
  
It was later in the morning, but Kanda didn’t have anything else to do – or at least, he didn’t think he did. For the last three days, he had been in a daze, completely disengaged from his environment. It was strange and discombobulating; Kanda didn’t even remember the first day after the attack. He had just cut himself off completely, not even leaving his room once that day.  
  
Kanda didn’t bother trying to recall the details. The following days were less of a blank, though they were more blurred together. His aunt had been oddly sparing in not asking him to attend any meetings and some bitter part of Kanda wondered if she somehow knew something.  
  
Either way – he felt terrible. And he hated feeling terrible.  
  
By the time he reached the training room, several guards were practicing. They were at one end working on some hand-to-hand combat, too engaged to really take any notice of the prince. However, Daisya and Marie were also present, their attention shifting as Kanda entered inside.  
  
Daisya was the first to notice, spotting Kanda. He held Charity Bell as he turned toward the prince. “Hey, didn’t know you were coming here.”  
  
Kanda didn’t react. He walked over to a bench as he took off his jacket, tossing it aside. “Were you guys training just now?” As he spoke, Kanda noticed the words sounded distant. For a fleeting second, he wondered if he had even asked the question aloud.  
  
Marie responded. “We were, but I’ll have to report to Tiedoll soon. We’ll be going out for another round in a bit."  
  
The words, although spoken calmly, were jarring against Kanda’s ears. He turned somewhat sharply, a question on the tip of his tongue. However, Kanda caught himself; he already knew the answer.  
  
His chest felt like stone as he turned to Daisya. “Let’s train.”  
  
Daisya blinked. Kanda hadn’t exactly worded it as a request, but the exorcist rolled it off his shoulders with a shrug. “Sure. Marie and I didn’t go for too long.” He paused, expression turning a hint more serious – something rather out of character for how typically laid back he was. “You sure you’re okay to? You don’t look like you’ve slept in several days.”  
  
Kanda sneered under his breath. “I’m _fine_ ,” he bit back, nerves grated. “I just need to fucking move.”  
  
“Alright, alright – let’s have at it.”  
  
Daisya walked back into the arena as Marie kept to the sidelines. Quietly, Kanda followed Daisya, his sword illuminating as he silently pulled it from its sheath and activated it.  
  
Kanda was only in the arena for maybe twenty seconds before Daisya attacked first. He reacted immediately. Daisya kicked Charity bell, a sonic wave rippling into the air; it nearly hit him, but he ducked, the impact barely missing him. Swiftly, Kanda charged forward, pulling a second blade of light from Mugen as he attacked.  
  
Daisya recovered Charity Bell, and was barely able to block as he kicked the ball upward, Kanda’s blades hitting it instead. The impact caused him to falter, and Daisya cracked a smile.  
  
“Come on – I can’t let you win that easy! Your Highness is going to have to do way better than that,” he joked.  
  
Kanda stiffened, his thoughts drawing to a halt.  
  
 _Alma didn’t give Kanda a chance to say anything else. “Congratulations on making it through the examination,” he murmured. Almost inaudibly, he added, “Your Highness.”_  
  
The memory was sharp and unwelcomed. Kanda immediately tensed as his insides coiled, his last interaction with Alma too painful for words. Suddenly, he was overwhelmed. He felt like was choking – as though his lungs were constricted by a viper, muscles threatening to lock up.  
  
He wanted it to stop. He didn’t want to think about what happened. He didn’t want to remember-  
 _  
“I…I just don’t know why you’d…why you’d_ lead me on _…”_  
  
 _‘It wasn’t on purpose,’_ Kanda wanted to scream. _‘I didn’t hurt you_ on purpose _!’  
  
_ Like a flood, those emotions toppled down onto Kanda. Suddenly, he couldn’t think or focus; he could only _feel._ It was unbearable – anger, pain, and heartache all threatened to consume him, to drown him and to pull him under. To pull him under, just as Alma had been pulled away in his dreams.  
  
Alma. Alma reaching out for him. Screaming for help. The dream came back cruelly and Kanda couldn’t breathe. Had that been how Alma had sounded when he had been attacked? Had he even had a chance to scream at all? Kanda would never know. He would never know what happened.  
  
Grip tight on Mugen, he fought. He didn’t even know what he was fighting anymore – he didn’t remember. But, he couldn’t let it consume him. He _wouldn’t let it consume him_ -  
  
“Kanda! _Kanda!”  
  
‘Just shut up,’_ Kanda silently screamed. He wanted it to stop. The guilt. The agony. He just wanted it to go away. _‘Shut_ up _!’_  
  
“Kanda, shit – _fucking stop_!”  
  
The words were panicked and struck a chord within Kanda. Blinking, he froze; his body was already drenched in sweat, his arm sore. His hand clasped onto Mugen so tightly that it felt as though it were close to cramping up. Kanda forced himself to loosen his grip as he took a step back, suddenly remembering where he was: the training room. He was in the training room, and he had been training with Daisya.  
  
Daisya, who he had just attacked.  
  
Daisya panted. He stood up straight, kicking up Charity Bell as he caught it swiftly before he looked at Kanda, brow furrowed in confusion. “What the hell? I thought you were going to slice my face off – you went totally berserk just now!”  
  
 _‘What?’_ Kanda balked, unable to respond. He opened his mouth, but no words came out, his senses slowly returning. Training. They had been training and…then what? Had Kanda blacked out? In his peripheral, he noticed that the few guards who had been training at the other end of the arena had stopped, taking notice of what was going on between him and Daisya.  
  
Daisya frowned. His lighthearted demeanor had shifted, turning sharp. “What gives? You know I like a challenge, but I had to practically scream at you to stop. What’s going on?”  
  
The question was posed directly, and in the blink of an eye, Kanda closed up. “Nothing.” His expression turned hard, words terse. “This was stupid. I’m going.”  
  
“What? But you were dead set on training five minutes ago!” Daisya argued. “Seriously, what’s _up_ with you? You’ve been acting weird for the last few days and it’s kind of starting to worry me.”  
  
Kanda’s head whipped back in Daisya’s direction. “I said it’s _nothing_ ,” he hissed heatedly. “So, shut up about it.”  
  
Daisya didn’t say anything else. Kanda took his chance to leave the arena after that, collecting his jacket from the bench as he placed Mugen back into its sheath. Marie was still present, having lingered nearby, though the exorcist didn’t say anything to Kanda. Silently, Kanda wondered how much he had heard.  
  
He didn’t risk it. Kanda left swiftly before anyone could catch him, hurrying down the corridor. He made a swift turn, cutting through one of the lesser traversed halls used by servants. It was a bit narrow and more dimly lit, but no one was around. Despite this, Kanda didn’t slow his pace. He needed to get away and get _out_.  
  
 _‘Where? Where do you think you’re going to_ go _?’_ a voice asked him.  
  
Kanda ignored it. Fuck where he was going – he didn’t care. He just had to go somewhere where he wouldn’t be distracted. Where he didn’t have to think about what had happened or how he felt. He needed an escape, where he’d never think of-  
  
He almost ran into someone, by chance managing to avoid any sort of collision. He took a step back as he saw he had almost run into one of the attendants who had been cutting through the halls as well.  
  
The attendant faltered at seeing Kanda and apologized profusely. “Ah, apologies, Your Highness – I had no idea you’d be here.”  
  
 _Alma stared, wide-eyed with surprise. The bucket of water was now half-full, with the majority of it having been spilt all over Kanda. “I’m – I’m so sorry. You just came around the corner so quickly and the bucket was too heavy-“_  
  
Kanda tried to focus, the memory holding far too much poignancy. He stiffened as he moved past the attendant, continuing on. “It’s fine.”  
  
 _It’s fine._ That had been what he had said to Alma when they first met, hadn’t it? It was a strange detail to recall, but the experience replayed in Kanda’s mind with an unanticipated vividness. That first day when Kanda had left to go look for seal marks. He had snapped at Alma when they first met, but despite it, Alma had been so kind to him…  
  
Kanda hadn’t deserved any of that kindness. Not after what he had done to Alma.  
  
He hadn’t even realized where he was going anymore, moving through the back halls without any further interruption. Eventually, he came to one corridor – a smaller, dimly lit one. He trekked down it for a few more minutes before he eventually came to an old door – the one that led outside into the east gardens. Impulsively, Kanda exited through it.  
  
It was cool outside. Everything looked a bit greener after the recent rainstorm and the sky was blue. A few clouds loomed to break up the sunlight, but Kanda kept to the shade, slinking back against one of the cherry blossom trees as he sat on the grass. From his vantage point, he saw the pond and bridge up ahead – but he wasn’t close enough to see if the lotuses had bloomed.  
  
Not that it mattered. Kanda didn’t want to see them.  
  
He didn’t move from that spot, staying outside for some unknown amount of time. Kanda didn’t even care if he had anywhere else he was supposed to be – he didn’t care and he didn’t want to deal with anything right now. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, and he didn’t want to see anyone.  
  
 _‘You’re so pathetic,’_ a part of himself sneered. _‘Fucking grieving over some stable boy you didn’t even know for that long…’_  
  
 _‘He wasn’t just a fucking stable boy,’_ another part argued. _‘He was a fucking_ person. _’_  
  
He tried to block these thoughts as they clashed against one another viciously. God, why couldn’t he just turn his mind off for five minutes? Kanda didn’t know how much more he could take.  
  
“Kanda.”  
  
Kanda stiffened, looking up as soon as he heard his name. His shoulders barely relaxed as he saw General Tiedoll, the man standing just a few feet away. A hint of concern was in his light brown eyes and Kanda abruptly broke eye contact.  
  
Tiedoll looked at Kanda warily. “I was wondering where you were,” he spoke. “I haven’t seen you around that much lately.”  
  
Kanda huffed under his breath, still keeping silent.  
  
Tiedoll took a seat next to Kanda in the grass. He didn’t speak at first, allowing the silence to linger between them a bit longer. Tiedoll’s focus briefly shifted toward the pond and the rest of the gardens. “This is probably one of the prettiest areas on the grounds. I’ll have to find time to come draw out here soon.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He already suspected that the general had sought him out for some reason and that the small talk was more or less an ice breaker. Tiedoll always had a way of using those.  
  
Sure enough, his suspicions were confirmed as soon as Tiedoll spoke again. “I saw Daisya and Marie. They told me about what happened in the training room.”  
  
Kanda automatically tensed. Right – he had completely lost it and essentially taken out his aggression on Daisya. The memory made him cringe and he had hoped that it would blow over. Or maybe it wouldn’t and he would be wrong. Kanda had ended up being wrong about a lot of things lately.  
  
Tiedoll kept his gaze ahead, his focus seemingly on the pond. “We haven’t spoken much since the attack,” he observed softly, before he finally looked in Kanda’s direction. “I’m sorry we couldn’t find that stable boy. The one you knew.”  
  
Kanda’s fist balled. He exhaled slowly, the mere mention of Alma almost enough to make him lash out. Exhaustion clung to his bones, keeping him in check; he had already snapped earlier and what had happened in the training room had left Kanda depleted. He didn’t want to snap again. He didn’t have it in him.  
  
He was just so tired.  
  
Tiedoll allowed the seconds to pass by undisturbed, giving Kanda a chance to speak. However, when the prince did no such thing, Tiedoll continued gently. “Did you know him well?”  
  
Clenching and unclenching his fist, Kanda swallowed. “No,” he spoke quietly. “I only knew him for a few days.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “I never had the pleasure of speaking to him,” he commented. “Would you tell me what he was like?”  
  
Kanda faltered at the question. He hadn’t expected being asked something so specific and he contemplated ignoring the request all together. He struggled enough with trying to forget about Alma. Did he really want to utter anything else about him aloud?  
  
“Why does it matter?” Kanda asked, voice low. “It doesn’t make a difference talking about him. He’s never coming back.”  
  
Speaking the words was like sticking a knife into his own heart. Kanda couldn’t even continue – saying aloud that Alma was never going to return _hurt_. It hurt so much and inside Kanda felt as though he were breaking apart.  
  
“It doesn’t matter. He was just…some stable boy who was way too nice to people. Fucking worried about everyone else before himself.” Kanda’s voice was soft, words barely more than a mumble. “Alma was so damn sensitive all the time…”  
  
Sensitive. And sweet – Alma had been really sweet and it only made Kanda feel worse for how things had fallen between them.  
  
Tiedoll hummed thoughtfully. “I see,” he said as he carefully considered his next words. “How do you think Alma would feel right now? Do you think he would worry about how you’re feeling?”  
  
Kanda looked back at Tiedoll, somewhat taken aback. His thoughts had drawn to a halt, the questions having been enough to disrupt his thought process all together.  
  
Tiedoll continued. “When you talk about him, he doesn’t seem like the type who’d be happy to see how you’re feeling now.” He met Kanda’s gaze, eyes knowing. “Or am I wrong?”  
  
Kanda looked away. His jaw tightened as he gritted his teeth together, daring to even consider Tiedoll’s suggestion. How would Alma feel if he saw Kanda then? Would he care? Would he want Kanda to feel better? Or, would he be angry, and think that Kanda deserved it?  
  
No – no, Alma probably wouldn’t have wanted Kanda to be upset. Which made Kanda all the more deserving of whatever pain he was in.  
  
Kanda exhaled. “It’s pointless,” he spoke. “It doesn’t make a difference what he’d want or how I feel. It won’t change anything.”  
  
“Maybe not,” Tiedoll suggested. “But, it may help you find some closure. You deserve that much.”  
  
Kanda scoffed under his breath, heart heavy and chained down. Tiedoll could try all he wanted, but Kanda knew that he wouldn’t ever have closure over what had happened.  
  
Tiedoll stood up. “Marie and I have to go out soon,” he said. Pausing, he glanced at Kanda. “I saw Anita earlier. I think she was hoping to speak with you today.”  
  
Kanda frowned, his suspicions once more surfacing. “What about?”  
  
“You’ll have to ask her that,” Tiedoll said. “But you’ve been quite distant these last few days. I’m sure a part of it is she’s worried about you.”  
  
Kanda stiffened, a twinge of guilt nipping at his core. He looked away.  
  
Tiedoll smiled gently. “I’m sure I’ll see you later today.” Somewhat more somberly he added, “If Marie and I find anything, we’ll let you know.”  
  
Kanda didn’t bother to respond as he heard the general start off. He waited until Tiedoll was a fair distance away before he reached into his pocket, pulling out the lotus charm bracelet.  
  
He stared at it, the white-gold flower gleaming softly.  
  
Quietly, he put the bracelet away.  
  
  


* * *

  
The meeting with the advisors came to a close, offering Anita some relief. It hadn’t been a very long meeting, but the topics covered had been exhausting – one issue being security for the kingdom. The decision had been made to invest in more guards in the meantime, though other long-term solutions would have to be considered.  
  
“It’ll help to keep an eye on things,” an advisor said. The group had already dispersed, though several nobles remained in the meeting hall to speak amongst themselves, Anita catching the tail end of one conversation. “For the time being, at least.”  
  
Anita’s attention was broken quickly as Legory approached her. She stood up from her seat at the head of the table and turned to him. “Thank you again for your attendance. I know you didn’t plan to be here this long, but your insight is very helpful.”  
  
“Of course, Your Majesty,” Legory offered. His gaze gleamed with a scrutinous hint as he continued. “I am a bit surprised Prince Yuu hasn’t been more active – I thought he was supposed to be getting involved more following the examination? Or has that changed?”  
  
There was the slightest hint of disapproval in his words and Anita was careful to keep her expression polite. “It hasn’t changed, but I wanted to give him some time. He’s seemed a bit distressed since the recent attack.”  
  
Legory raised an eyebrow. “That’s perplexing to hear – there have been other attacks before, haven’t they? He seemed quite intent on dealing with them, too.”  
  
A soft frown tugged at Anita’s lips. “Yuu was upset about the stable boy who was lost in the attack,” she explained. “During the last few attacks no lives were lost.”  
  
Legory’s expression shifted, gaze hardening. “Interesting,” he mused. “I suppose it was tragic, but I find it hard to understand why he’d be so upset when it was only a stable boy. As time goes on, there will be many more losses he’ll have to deal with.”  
  
The statement was spoken coolly, immediately putting Anita off. “My brother always wanted to raise Yuu to value all lives in the kingdom. I’ve done my best to encourage that,” she stated calmly. “That includes any and all servants.”  
  
Legory nodded, somewhat backtracking. “Of course – please forgive my bluntness.”  
  
Anita nodded, but paused as her attention shifted to the main doors. As several of the advisors were leaving, Kanda had walked in, a few of the advisors politely nodding in acknowledgment. He bypassed them quickly, approaching Anita once he spotted her.  
  
Anita smiled warmly at her nephew. “Yuu – I wasn’t expecting to see you here.”  
  
“Tiedoll said you wanted to speak with me,” Kanda said. His gaze shifted to Legory warily before he looked back at Anita. “What did you want to talk about?”  
  
“I wanted to check in – these last few days I’ve been a bit preoccupied,” Anita started. Her gaze softened, her voice gaining an almost maternal edge. “How’re you feeling?”  
  
Kanda scowled. “Tch. Fine,” he grumbled. The question was uncomfortable and he wished that his aunt hadn’t asked him – it wasn’t as though he would have gone into detail about how he felt, let alone when Legory was within earshot.  
  
To Kanda’s disdain, Legory spoke. “Well, that’s certainly good news,” he said. “We were just discussing your involvement with these advisory meetings. I imagine I’ll be seeing you more in the future?”  
  
Kanda turned to the duke sharply, brow furrowed. Before he could react, Anita spoke up.  
  
“Legory will be participating more while he’s staying with us, to help with any additional insight. Because he’s from Liorea, we can compare our methods of handling affairs to how they do to see if there’s any room for improvement,” she explained. “Since we talked about shifting your focus from exorcism, he was interested to know more about when we’d be starting that.”  
  
The message came through clearly, even if Anita hadn’t explicitly stated it. Kanda knew that she was signaling a reminder of the decision that had been made several weeks ago – that Kanda was no longer an active exorcist and would be focusing more on learning to manage things with the kingdom.  
  
Inwardly, he cringed. Kanda hadn’t even thought about that the last few days and he realized his aunt must have intentionally given him space – just as she was now cueing him that his time was up.  
  
Kanda exhaled. He crossed his arms as he averted his gaze. “I don’t care,” he grumbled. “Whenever, I guess.”  
  
Anita paused. She hadn’t missed the lack of enthusiasm, but at the same time, the response had been strangely compliant. However, she nodded, not wanting to push the issue when it wasn’t needed. “Let’s meet this evening to discuss it more,” she said, words encouraging. “I think it’ll be a nice change for you with everything that’s happened.”  
  
Kanda didn’t say anything. He knew his aunt was trying to be affirming, but the words only left a dull, hollow space in his chest. In the past, he would have never given in so easily – he would have never agreed to stop actively working as an exorcist.  
  
Maybe, everything had finally taken its toll.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! (And good riddance to 2020 adjklasdjlkasd)
> 
> I wanted to kick off the calendar new year with an update, so here it is! Although a very sad one - the title really says it all with how some of the characters are doing, namely Kanda and Allen. 
> 
> This is definitely a bit more of a transitional chapter, but I never like to rush fallout (it’s a waste of angst and suffering, and I like to explore how the characters deal - especially Kanda). Again, I’m hoping that everyone still feels true to character despite being adapted. I did have to slip in at least one dream scene, though - it wouldn’t be a fic of mine if I didn’t at least give Kanda one. (He was due, since I usually give Alma all the dream scenes. X3)
> 
> Speaking of Alma - the effects of what happened last chapter will be coming up soon. So we’ll be seeing what happened to him. >;333
> 
> Not too many notes aside from that, but I hope everyone is off to a good start with the new year! 
> 
> As always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated! <3


	15. Inner Darkness

_Darkness. He was surrounded by complete darkness.  
  
Alma tried to move. His body ached and felt like lead, as though it weighed a ton. He hardly had the strength to open his eyes as he attempted to gauge his surroundings – but he couldn’t see anything. It was only an abyss that stretched on forever.  
  
He blinked. Slowly, he tried to recall what had happened – where he was and how he had gotten there. He tried to recover those memories, but drew a blank: his mind was a clean slate, everything erased.  
  
No – not everything. Something gradually trickled into his veins, cold and frigid. It festered in his core, its name dawning on him.  
  
Fear. It was fear.  
  
Again, Alma tried to move. He couldn’t, his body paralyzed. He was trapped in that darkness, frightened as something akin to despair flooded over him. Despair. Pain. Heartache.  
  
_‘Yuu.’ _  
  
The name slipped into his mind, his heart breaking. Yuu –_ Kanda _. Alma couldn’t remember anything else, but he could remember him and feeling safe with him...  
  
_ ‘Yuu,’ _he wanted to say._ ‘Yuu, where are you?’ _  
  
The unspoken question felt like a knife and Alma’s eyes watered. He was too tired to fight it though, his body weak and in pain.  
  
Slowly, the darkness overtook him.  
_  
  


* * *

  
  
It felt as though an eternity had passed before Alma regained consciousness. His senses returned gradually, his mind suspended in darkness. The air around him was cool and the ground hard – _stone_ , he recognized. It was damp and mossy, a strange sense of déjà vu befalling him.  
  
He tried to move, a grimace marring his expression. His body _hurt_ – almost as though his muscles had been ripped apart and haphazardly sewn back together, pain seeping deep into his marrow. His head was the worst; it pounded dully, his eyes watering from the pressure. Alma felt as though he had been thrown headfirst into a brick wall.  
  
Breaths shallow, Alma tried to think. What had happened? His memories were so foggy. He…he remembered leaving Ilveria. And the traveling party had started back…  
  
The attack. The akuma. Being taken.  
  
 _“We’ve been looking for another helper for a while. You should be flattered that the tease chose you,” Tyki spoke, voice low in Alma’s ear. “I’m a little surprised, though – I had suspected the exorcist to be the one it wanted. But you have that much darkness inside, don’t you?”_  
  
Like a tidal wave, panic washed over Alma. His eyes opened wide, fear clutching at his heart. Abducted – those strange people had _abducted him_. They had taken him for some reason and tormented him with some kind of magic – it hadn’t been like anything Alma had ever seen before.  
  
Biting his lip, Alma forced himself to sit up. His body felt strangely heavy and his surroundings threatened to spin. He shut his eyes as he attempted to focus, before glancing around. He recognized the room – it was the one he had woken up in previously, inside the ruins as the mossy stone walls surrounded him. Up above, the sky was dark; it was painted plum, the faintest hint of light in the west. Sundown.  
  
 _‘I have to leave,_ ’ he thought, attempting to stand. Another wave of dizziness befell Alma, though, preventing him from moving. He brought his hand to his head as he shut his eyes, nausea curdling in his stomach. His heart continued to thud in his chest, his unease spreading further. _‘I have to...’_ He opened his eyes once more as he lowered his hand-  
  
Alma froze.  
  
He stared, not processing the sight before him. His hand wasn’t right – it didn’t _look_ right. His skin was far too pale, ashen and gray; what appeared to a blue, fingerless glove lingered on it, too. It looked strange and Alma’s nails were sharp – too sharp. Like small claws.  
  
Shakily, Alma took his other hand – which looked just as strange and foreign – and tugged at the blue part. He winced. It was connected to his skin – _was_ his skin.  
  
His breathing grew shallow, panic mounting in his chest. He stared at his hands a few seconds longer, noting the way the wrist was unnaturally knobby. _‘W-what…’_  
  
Unable to contain himself, Alma looked at the rest of his body. He was still dressed, though his clothing felt uncomfortable. It didn’t fit right, and around his knees Alma saw something knobby and bulbous. Pulling up one of the pant legs, he saw that his skin was still ashen, his kneecap strange and circular, colored yellow and green.  
  
“Huh. So, you woke up.”  
  
Alma stiffened. He looked up, alarmed and expecting to see one of the three strangers who had taken him earlier. He was flummoxed when he saw someone else entirely though – a man near the exit of the ruins, young and maybe only a few years older than Alma. Or at least, Alma had thought he was a man.  
  
When he looked closely, Alma realized he was something else.  
  
He almost looked human – almost. His skin was also ashen, limbs knobby and mechanical-looking. Brightly colored markings covered his arms, nails long and claw-like – just like Alma’s. He wore a loose, sleeveless tunic and slacks, his shoulders exposed as triangular protrusions remained on each blade. Green markings remained beneath his eyes, which were red – a contrast to his dark green hair that was pulled into a side ponytail, just barely exposing unnaturally pointed ears.  
  
He also had a tail – a long, thin tail that swished behind him.  
  
Alma stared. He couldn’t speak, his throat dry as he continued to internally panic, body paralyzed in fear.  
  
The man – or thing? – looked unimpressed. “It’s rude to stare.”  
  
Finally, Alma was able to find his voice. His words were quiet and almost inaudible. “What…what are you?” His chest began to tremble, his breaths threatening to grow shallow once more. “I-I don’t know what’s wrong with my hands-“  
  
The stranger rested his chin on his hand as he eyed Alma with mild intrigue. “Didn’t they tell you?” he asked, tone oddly neutral. “They put dark matter into you – it’s what makes people into akuma. Or at least, starts the process.”  
  
Alma’s heart fell straight into his stomach. He shook his head as he forced himself to stand. He tried to ignore the way his knees threatened to buckle. “No,” he stammered. “No, I – I don’t have that. I’m not – I can’t be-“  
  
He didn’t finish. Despite his denial, a part of him coiled with fear, his memories of his encounter with Tyki, Road, and Wisely coursing through his mind. “I…”  
  
Shakily, Alma brought his hands to his face. His nose, lips, chin – they all felt normal. But when he felt his ears, they were sharp. Pointed. _‘I’m not…’_  
  
 _“Once that dark matter is in your blood, you’ll make for nice little akuma.”_  
  
Alma stiffened. Tyki’s words echoed in his ears despite his attempts to block them. But the more time passed, the more he recalled what had happened before he blacked out – just as he recalled Tyki doing something to him right before he lost consciousness.  
  
He had to know.  
  
Hurriedly, Alma ran, rushing past the stranger. Eyebrow raised, the stranger called after him. “You can’t leave-“  
  
Alma didn’t listen. He nearly tripped down the steps of the ruins, panic flaring uncontrollably as he ran toward the lake. The grass was soft and uneven, but he pushed, stopping just along the edge where several more stone steps dipped into the water.  
  
He collapsed to his knees. Alma ignored the pain, heart thumping viciously. He felt sick, like he’d possibly lose his stomach, but he fought the way his nerves bundled, swallowing as he looked down at his reflection.  
  
It wasn’t as clear as a mirror, but the glass-smooth surface of the water allowed for Alma to see enough. Even in the darkness, he could make out the majority of his features: skin that was too pale and eerily pallid, his face marred by vertical, blue markings beneath his eyes. His ears were too long and pointed, and his hair now held a strange blueish hue.  
  
Breaths shallow, Alma brought his hands up, staring at them once more. They trembled slightly, but he forced himself to look at them once more. Again, he touched his face, horror festering uncontrollably as he looked in the water once more.  
  
Bile rose in the back of his throat and Alma covered his mouth.  
  
They had done something. They had _done something to him_.  
  
The stranger approached Alma from behind, his steps gentle. He placed a clawed hand on his hip as he watched Alma tremble, breaths uneven as he reeled from the shock of his own reflection. “I could have warned you not to look if you’d have let me. It always sucks to see the first time.”  
  
Alma exhaled, chest trembling as he strained to breathe. His eyes suddenly burned, but he was unable to tear his gaze away from his hands, his reflection – from whatever freakish thing these strangers had turned him into. He was unable to look away, just as he was unable to stop his eyes from watering, the shock of it all too devastating to bear.  
  
“What-“ His voice cracked, his vision blurring and hot. “What did they _do_ to me?”  
  
“I already told you,” the stranger repeated. “They put dark matter into you.”  
  
Alma sucked in, tears welling in his eyes. “T-Take it out,” he demanded, as he looked back at the stranger. “Take it out of me!”  
  
The stranger blinked. He crossed his arms and exhaled. “Yeah, that won’t happen. Once it’s in you, you can kiss your humanity goodbye-“  
  
Alma snapped, eyes turning red as they glowed. “I said _take it out of me!”_  
  
His hands sparked with violet light, an explosion of energy bursting from the palms of his hands.  
  
The stranger’s eyes widened and he jumped out of the way. The attack brushed past him, hitting the ground with a remarkable force. A visible dent was left in the grass, the earth smoking.  
  
Alma brought his hands to his mouth, eyes wide as they returned to their normal blue color. Shock overtook him, something swishing behind him anxiously at the base of his spine.  
  
The stranger looked back at the impact. He turned back to Alma, gaze slightly impressed. “Guess that’s why they picked you…even _I_ couldn’t throw an attack like that at first.”  
  
Alma shook his head. “I – I didn’t mean to,” he said, still trying to swallow that the blast had come from _him_. Behind him, something twitched and it agitated him. “I-“  
  
He stopped, finally reaching back. He had his cloak on and thought maybe a twig or something had gotten caught onto the fabric. However, as Alma reached behind his hand brushed against something at the base of his spine – something that had cut through the fabric of his clothes, long and swishing.  
  
A tail. He had a tail.  
  
The blood drained from his face and Alma tugged it, unable to look away; it was long like the stranger’s and had an arrow-shaped tip. It twitched in his grasp as Alma stared at it in horror.  
  
He couldn’t keep the bile down any longer.  
  
He retched, grabbing his stomach as he fell to the ground. He didn’t have anything to purge, though, his body convulsing as he dry-heaved. Once again, tears welled in his eyes, vision burning.  
  
The stranger watched for a moment, before finally approaching Alma. “Hey.” He placed a hand on Alma’s back, the touch surprisingly light. “Come on – you can’t do anything about it now.”  
  
Alma coughed. He tried to catch his breath, face hot. “I-I don’t want to be an akuma,” he sputtered, tears finally falling. “I don’t want to _be like this_!”  
  
He broke off, voice cracking as he sobbed. He couldn’t hold it in anymore, too overwhelmed and exhausted. He was too scared and confused; he didn’t understand why this had happened or why he had been taken. He didn’t understand how he could have become an akuma – how he could have become a _monster._  
  
Another sob fell and Alma choked. “I don’t…”  
  
He didn’t finish, hands digging into the soft earth. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter how badly Alma wanted to be normal again – he was a freak now. Something that people feared. Something that exorcists _hunted_. There was dark matter in him, and Alma had no idea how to get it out…  
  
He had never been more afraid in his life.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Kanda couldn’t sleep again.  
  
He wasn’t surprised. His sleep had been restless for the last several nights, with any reprieve seemingly out of reach. It was exhausting; he couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so depleted. It was as though his energy had been sucked dry, his thoughts refusing to turn off despite the wear that clung to his bones.  
  
He hated it.  
  
Rolling over, his attention flickered to the window. He wasn’t sure what time it was – probably close to midnight. Kanda felt like he had been squirming in his bed for over an hour, the silken sheets twisted around his legs and only partially covering his body. His attention remained on the window, though, the sky dark and filled with stars.  
  
He exhaled, finally giving in as he sat up. He wasn’t going to fall asleep anytime soon and staying in bed would drive him mad.  
  
 _‘Fuck this.’_ Kanda threw the sheets off as he got up, his bare feet touching the cool, smooth floor. He reached over, grabbing a loose, long-sleeved nightshirt as he threw it on, tying his hair back after.  
  
He slipped on some shoes before reaching the door, opening it quietly. The hallway was dark, only illuminated by the candelabras hanging along the walls. Silence stretched down both directions, the castle quiet as its occupants slept.  
  
It was a good time for a walk.  
  
Kanda started off, heading in one direction. He didn’t have a specific destination in mind; aside from a few guards patrolling the castle, everyone else would be asleep. It was unlikely he would run into anyone, which was comforting – Kanda didn’t care to see anyone else.  
  
The evening had taken more than enough of his energy. Before dinner, Anita had spoken to Kanda about his schedule and responsibilities, going over what would be expected and what changes would need to be made. It was monotonous and every second that passed during that conversation felt like a dull knife pushing into Kanda’s chest. More meetings. More politics. Less training. Less exorcism.  
  
 _“It’ll be better this way.”_  
  
That was what his aunt had said – that it would be better, at least for the time being. Kanda would be able to better prepare for the years ahead and his coronation in two years. He would be able to prepare for settling down, taking over, ruling…  
  
A cold sense of dread washed over him, his chest turning hollow.  
  
A part of him knew it was inevitable. It didn’t matter how stubborn Kanda was; deep down, he had always known he’d have to cave to that mold that had been carved for him since birth. He had always known he’d have to give in at some point – he just hated he was doing so now.  
  
 _‘You’re giving up.’_  
  
The accusation slipped into his thoughts, cutting into him like the blade of his sword. Kanda’s tension festered, denial spilling into his chest. He wasn’t giving _up_ -  
  
 _‘When did you ever back down so easily?’_ a voice asked that sounded so strangely like his own. _‘You didn’t even keep looking for Alma after coming back. You just accepted that he was_ dead _-‘  
  
_ Kanda’s fist slammed against the wall, the impact echoing dully in the dark halls.  
  
“Shut up _,_ ” Kanda hissed, teeth gritted. “Shut _up_.”  
  
The silence stretched around him, swallowing him whole. He should have been relieved; it was still quiet, which meant no one was rushing to see what the impact had been, offering him what should have been a bit more solitude. However, his thoughts taunted him and he couldn’t stop thinking about…  
  
Alma. He kept thinking about Alma.  
  
Tearing his fist from the wall, Kanda exhaled heavily. What was he supposed to do? Alma had been a victim in an akuma attack – he had _disappeared_. He was gone and no one had been able to find him.  
  
 _‘No one was able to find a body, either,’_ Kanda thought, the suggestion slipping into his mind almost tauntingly.  
  
For a fleeting second, it was enough to throw him. It was enough to invite denial back into his heart, holding onto the unrealistic hope that maybe somehow – _somehow_ – that Alma might have survived. That he might have somehow escaped and hidden away.  
  
The notion lingered and Kanda started walking. He needed to clear his head. Too much had happened in the last few weeks and it was driving him crazy. Alma was gone and if he had somehow survived? How would he be surviving in that forest? He wouldn’t have lasted…  
  
Kanda would have given anything for Alma to still be alive.  
  
Heart sinking, Kanda paused as he came to an intersection in the corridors. He still had yet to see any guards patrolling, but knew he was exiting the wing where the royal chambers were. Maybe he’d go outside onto the walkway – the sky had looked clear from his window. Fresh air sounded soothing.  
  
He turned, heading toward the direction of the outside walkway. However, before he could get too far, he passed a door – one that was slightly ajar. It led to a reading room, though Kanda never spent much time there; it was a leisurely space that usually his aunt would use if she wanted to focus on work or spend some downtime.  
  
Kanda glanced at it. He didn’t give it much thought, until he noticed a soft light coming from inside. A small frown tugged at his lips. Was his aunt still awake? He was tempted to pick up his pace – it was late, and he couldn’t imagine Anita would have been up for much longer. She wasn’t often awake at such odd hours and he didn’t want to risk her catching him.  
  
Quietly, he moved past the door-  
  
“I’m still worried about him.”  
  
Kanda paused. His dark blue eyes flickered to the door as he recognized Anita’s voice – which was followed by Mahoja’s not a moment later.  
  
“You talked to him earlier, right? Kanda just needed some time. And you said he was willing to take on more responsibilities now with the throne.”  
  
A frown tugged at his lips, chest tight with annoyance. Of course. _Of course_ they were talking about him. He wished his aunt wouldn’t be so damned worried all of the time – Kanda had agreed to take on more, so what was the problem? She should have been happy. He hadn’t even argued like he normally did, so why was it worth a conversation?  
  
“He’s not going to be in harm’s way anymore,” Mahoja went on. “I know that’s what you were worried about, but there’s nothing else that can be done. You’ve done all you can.”  
  
A small, almost inaudible sigh escaped Anita. “You’re right. I’m sorry – it’s just this reminds me of what happened with Izo…”  
  
Kanda stilled, his father’s name striking a chord. Suddenly, he was unable to walk away, keeping still as he listened.  
  
Mahoja paused. “We still don’t know if it’s the same situation,” she reassured, keeping her voice low. “Bookman is still looking into it, too. We can’t be sure.”  
  
“I know,” Anita agreed. “It’s late – I’m probably just overthinking things tonight.”  
  
Kanda’s brow furrowed. He had to practically strain his ears, but realized that he was dangerously close to getting caught. Carefully, he took a step back moving away from the door as he turned the corner. As he did, he heard both Anita and Mahoja exit, though their footsteps grew distant as they walked in the opposite direction.  
  
Kanda wavered. He wasn’t entirely sure what his aunt had been talking about. His father had died in an akuma attack, but as far as Kanda had known, there wasn’t anything unusual about it. It had been a tragedy. A terrible, unexpected tragedy. Yet, with how Anita and Mahoja had spoken…  
  
 _‘What the hell were they talking about?’_ Kanda frowned as he glanced back one final time toward the corridor they had gone down, before shaking his head. He wasn’t sure what his aunt had meant. Maybe, she had just been worrying too much as Mahoja had suggested.  
  
Despite this, Kanda couldn’t stop thinking about the conversation for the rest of the night.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
It was another late night for Lavi. He was used to them, being something of a night owl by nature and spending most evenings hunched over a desk going through whatever materials Bookman asked of him. That was how he’d spent the last few nights, as least. Bookman had a knack for discovering materials that even Lavi’s keen eye might have missed, so he was never without something to sift through. He always had something to focus on, to lose himself in – a good distraction from his own thoughts.  
  
Lavi needed one more than ever.  
  
He tried to focus. The text was old and written in a dialect that wasn’t as commonly used anymore. He had shifted gears a bit – since arriving in Ilveria, Lavi had predominantly sought content on akuma. Something that had provided a fruitless search despite his attempts. Because of that, he had decided to change his course of focus to something they knew a bit more about: innocence.  
  
Lavi wasn’t sure how helpful the shift would be, but he definitely needed a change. After looking for so much information on akuma, his mind needed to switch up topics. If anything, he would hopefully be able to find something helpful – after all, there was a connection between akuma and innocence, especially given that such magic was the only thing that could kill such monsters.  
  
 _‘Blah, blah…’_ Lavi’s good eye skimmed the page, his eyelid feeling heavy. He wasn’t sure what time it was, but knew he had been going through materials for hours, a pencil in his hand as he scrawled into a notebook. The candle on the desk had melted down almost halfway, the library backroom quiet as the warm glow flickered onto the walls. Bookman had been there earlier, though he had gone off to look for something – as to what, Lavi wasn’t sure.  
  
His hand cramped and Lavi paused his writing, taking a few seconds to stretch his hand as he rubbed it. His notes were full and he would have to move to a new page soon – quietly, he scanned all he had written so far.  
  
It was an overview of innocence – many details of which Lavi already knew. Innocence was a magic that had only been around for a little over a century in a form that it could be cultivated in. It could never quite be controlled, though – it was finicky and seemed to have its own sentience at times, taking the form of some equipment piece or attaching to an accommodator in the form of a parasite. Accommodators were people who were compatible to wield different forms of it, but how they were chosen was debatable. Sometimes, it was someone completely random – other times, innocence may have been compatible with those in the same family.  
  
 _‘Like Mugen,’_ Lavi thought. Kanda was one example of this – he was compatible with the same innocence his father had had before the late king’s untimely death. _‘Actually…’_  
  
A thought striking Lavi, he glanced around the desk. His attention quickly landed on one book that he had come across earlier – some archived documents containing notes about the different types of anti-akuma weapons that had been found in Ilveria. Taking the book, Lavi flipped through it.  
  
It was a log that the Ilverian scholars kept. In it, a list of innocence types recovered was made, as well as who held each innocence and for how long. Some were only recently discovered in the last hundred years: Marie’s rings and Daisya’s Charity Bell. Other innocence types were listed, though they had been noted as destroyed: a gauntlet, a pair of scales…  
  
Lavi skimmed reading about those, his attention eventually shifting to two other types: Mugen and Marker of Eden – Tiedoll’s innocence. Those had been the first two types to have been discovered a hundred years ago in Ilveria, aside from what had been found in Othelion and Liorea. Lavi recalled going through similar logs in the other kingdoms with their own histories on what anti-akuma weapons were tracked.  
  
 _‘Lenalee’s innocence is also one that’s been in her family,’_ Lavi noted. It hadn’t belonged to either of her parents, but her grandmother – that kind of innocence had also been one of the first to be found in Othelion.  
  
Thoughtfully, he tapped his finger against his chin. Othelion. Ilveria. So far, only those two kingdoms had started to see an influx in unusual akuma activity – Othelion more than Ilveria. The most recent attack made Lavi pause, though. Would more of them continue?  
  
 _‘Aside from Alma, it’s been CROWs and exorcists who have gone missing,’_ Lavi thought. _‘Though, if it were anyone else it’s not like we could know for sure…’_  
  
The door clicked as it opened, causing Lavi to look up. Bookman walked in, several more journals in his grasp as he shut the door behind him.  
  
Lavi straightened his posture in his seat. “Still up? I was beginning to wonder if you’d gone to bed and left me.”  
  
Bookman huffed. He glanced at Lavi’s desk, taking note of the materials sprawled out. “You’re actually working, I see.”  
  
Lavi sighed. “Always doubting me.” He shook his head as he crossed his arms, leaning a back in the rickety wooden chair. “What’d you bring?”  
  
“Just some old files.” Bookman walked over to his desk on the other side of the room, a mountain of papers and journals stacked on top of each other. “What have you found?”  
  
Lavi blinked as he turned in his chair, glancing at Bookman. “I was looking through some stuff on innocence. Found a log for what’s been recovered and maintained in Ilveria.” He paused, tone turning thoughtful. “Figured maybe we could find a connection there. Since we haven’t had much luck so far.”  
  
He crossed his arms, waiting for Bookman to say something. A small scoff or nod – he and Bookman had been so focused lately that that had become their usual exchange.  
  
What Bookman said next surprised him. “And?”  
  
Lavi blinked. He shifted in his chair as he glanced at his notes. “Well, I haven’t really come up with much else. A lot of these just talk about what different anti-akuma weapons do and who had then for when…” He paused, as he noticed something in the book. A frown tugged at his lips. “What does ‘crystal’ mean? It’s scrawled under Mugen, but doesn’t say anything else.”  
  
Bookman paused, lips also pressing into a tight line and gaze shrewd. “It’s a potential characteristic of Mugen,” he explained. “The late king activated it, but it’s uncertain whether it will happen again.”  
  
Lavi waited. He thought that Bookman might have gone into more detail, but the old man did no such thing. “You’re going to leave me hanging?”  
  
Bookman scoffed. “Is that all you found?”  
  
Lavi frowned at the deflected question. “Not exactly. I mean, I didn’t find anything. But this got me wondering – Princess Lenalee has innocence in Othelion – innocence that’s been around for the last century. And Kanda is in the same situation.” His green eye was bright in the candlelight as he made direct eye contact with Bookman. “After what happened to King Izo, I’m wondering if the akuma are working their way to the nobility. Specifically, those who have anti-akuma weapons.”  
  
Bookman didn’t say anything at first. The study was quiet as the old man remained still, dark eyes pensive.  
  
After a few more seconds, Lavi sighed. “I know it’s not like we have much of a basis for it, but it just seems like these attacks are moving toward the higher classes. Even with the last one,” Lavi explained. “Legory doesn’t have innocence, but he _is_ related to King Lvellie. Maybe they were hoping to destroy any innocence around as well.”  
  
As Lavi said this, his insides squirmed a bit. Technically, he and Bookman had their own variants of anti-akuma weapon – though they didn’t use them often or perform as normal exorcists. However, his thoughts mostly lingered on Allen. Allen was an accommodator with a parasitic type – one that was attached to his arm. And thinking that Allen might have been targeted…  
  
It made Lavi sick.  
  
Bookman exhaled. “It’s a grave suggestion. But I’m afraid I don’t think it’s that far off. Especially considering what happened ten years ago.”  
  
Lavi raised an eyebrow. “What, when King Izo died? It was an akuma attack, wasn’t it?”  
  
“Yes, but it wasn’t just that.” Bookman’s expression was solemn, the lines in his face harsh against the dim lighting of the room. “Supposedly, the akuma who killed him also spoke – one that was winged as well.”  
  
“What?” Lavi scrambled to get up, eyes wide. “Wait, you’re telling me I’ve been busting my ass to find out if akuma even had that capability and you _knew_? Why didn’t you tell me!?”  
  
“Because I didn’t trust you not to run your big mouth.” Bookman stared at him sharply. “This isn’t something to be spoken of lightly. Queen Anita is already aware, though I wanted to wait until we had more information before assuming such. If it’s true, we’re looking at something that goes beyond an akuma threat.”  
  
The air turned tense and Lavi sucked in a small breath. “Does Kanda even know?” he asked, realizing very well the prince may not have been aware. “If the queen regent knew-“  
  
“He doesn’t,” Bookman clipped. “And don’t you dare tell him – not until we discuss this further with Her Majesty. She’s made it clear she doesn’t want Kanda to know yet.”  
  
Lavi frowned. “But doesn’t he have a right? I mean, it was his father-“  
  
“ _Lavi_.”  
  
Lavi’s mouth clamped shut. Bookman’s tone had been cutting, silencing him before he could think to speak further.  
  
Bookman never once broke eye contact. “We have to go about this cautiously. Don’t let your emotions get in the way – you have to remember your place here.”  
  
The words unexpectedly pricked, and for a second, Lavi’s defenses rose. “They don’t get in the way,” he argued. “I’m focused-“  
  
“No, you’re not – not in the way you’re supposed to be,” Bookman said. “I’m old, but I’m not blind. Just because you’re going through materials doesn’t mean you haven’t lost focus elsewhere.”  
  
Lavi tensed. “What’s that supposed to mean?”  
  
“It means you need to remember that you’re an apprentice first and foremost – and an exorcist second, _if_ needed,” Bookman reiterated. “I have no qualms with alliances, but don’t lose sight of things.”  
  
Lavi didn’t say anything. He was tempted to argue, a fire lit beneath his skin. He wasn’t stupid, though; even without going into detail, Lavi had a strong inkling as to what Bookman was referring to.  
  
Quickly, he forced himself to calm down and swallowed his argument. Lavi gripped the back of his chair as he sat down. “Yeah. Right. Got it.”  
  
Bookman eyed Lavi a moment longer. “Let’s try to get through a bit more tonight,” he instructed. “I need to report to Queen Anita tomorrow – I’d like to have something more concrete to bring her.”  
  
Lavi nodded. He didn’t bother looking back as he returned his focus to the materials on his desk, his gaze flickering to the page.  
  
It was going to be a long night.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Eventually, Alma calmed down.  
  
It had taken a while. After realizing what had been done to him, he had experienced a full-fledged meltdown, sobbing so hard that he nearly made himself sick. The overwhelming shock had been too much; it had caused him to collapse, devastation wearing on his shoulders heavily. He just couldn’t think and didn’t understand _why_ …  
  
His head throbbed. Alma shut his eyes as he put his head down into his knees, taking a deep breath. He was outside, sitting against one of the walls of the ruins as he faced out toward the lake. The dark night stretched on, the moonless sky littered with stars.  
  
By the lake, the other person remained – that strange, akuma-man who Alma had met upon waking. Alma hadn’t spoken to him after his breakdown. He had simply let Alma be as he fell apart, spending the majority of his time right by the water. Alma didn’t even think to ask what the akuma-man was doing.  
  
After a few moments, the pain in his head subsided. Alma blinked, wrapping his arms around his knees as he looked up. He reached over, tugging on the edge of his cloak as he watched the stranger by the lake, who was crouched down. His tail moved, the pointed end lingering over the water.  
  
The akuma-man’s tail pierced the water, the splash causing Alma to wince.  
  
Standing up, the akuma-man pulled his tail out of the water, having skewered two fish. They flailed for maybe a second before they fell limp. He ripped them off of his tail before he knelt down, a spark of red flying from his other hand as he directed the impact toward the ground. Some wet soil and rocks had been placed around the area, a small fire starting. Taking a stick, the akuma-man skewered the two fish before laying them over the flame.  
  
Alma didn’t say anything. He silently watched as the akuma-man…cooked the fish? It was a strange image, given how inhuman he looked. Alma’s thoughts quickly derailed as his nose detected the charred smell of fish, his stomach twisting in hunger. When was the last time he had actually _eaten_?  
  
The akuma-man finished cooking, grabbing the stick. Both fish remained skewered on it as he approached Alma.  
  
Alma stiffened as he held his breath. Behind him, his tail twitched nervously and he inched farther back against the wall.  
  
The akuma-man remained unfazed. He snapped the stick in half, handing one of the fish to Alma. “Here,” he said. “You’re not fully turned yet, so you still have to eat occasionally. You were asleep for about three days, too.”  
  
Alma blinked, startled by the information. He had been unconscious that long? Registering the detail, he took the fish, the skin blackened. His mouth salivated as the scent wafted into his nostrils, though he forced himself to wait. Swallowing, he looked up at the akuma-man. “Um…thanks.” As his gaze lingered, he noticed two red dots vertically placed on the akuma-man’s forehead; Alma couldn’t help but think he had seen them somewhere before.  
  
The akuma-man shrugged. Without saying anything else, he walked a bit away from Alma, also sitting down as he started to eat.  
  
Alma eyed him a second longer. His curiosity brimmed, but he couldn’t think too much about his questions – he was too hungry. Returning his attention to the fish, he ate it, devouring the flaky meat quickly.  
  
Once finished, Alma set the remains and the stick down. He felt a bit clearer headed, his mind beginning to process what had happened. It was strange, though – Alma couldn’t help but feel that he wasn’t even awake, the whole thing bizarre and nightmarish. Dazedly, he looked at his hand and tugged at the blue covering over his palm. He winced. _‘I’m still…’_  
  
He sucked in a small breath. He had already broken down once and was tempted to believe that the only reason he wasn’t falling apart that instant was due to how depleted he felt. He just…still didn’t understand. He didn’t understand any of it.  
  
Glancing over, Alma saw that the akuma-man had nearly finished his fish. Before he could lose his nerve, he spoke – or at least, tried to. “Um…”  
  
The akuma-man’s pointed ears twitched and he turned toward Alma, red eyes piercing as he focused on Alma.  
  
Alma stiffened. His tail swished behind him anxiously, the sensation making him squeamish. Why did it have to move to so much? He reached back, grabbing it to keep it still.  
  
The akuma-man smirked. “Don’t like the tail? It gets useful, as freaky as it is to have.”  
  
Alma grimaced. His tail twitched more in his grasp despite his attempts to keep it still. “Why does it move like that?”  
  
The akuma-man snorted. “It’s attached to you. It acts based on how you’re feeling. You know, like with any animal.”  
  
Alma bit his lip. “I’m not an animal…” he murmured.  
  
“No. You’re only partially an akuma. For now, anyways.” The akuma-man leaned forward, as he rested his chin in the palm of his hand. “Just depends on whenever they feel like using you…”  
  
Alma blinked. “You mean those strange people? Road, Tyki…what do they want?” His voice trembled a bit as he asked. “Who are they? I don’t – I still don’t understand why I’m-“  
  
“It doesn’t really matter,” the akuma-man said, leaning his head back against the stone wall. “You’re here now. It’s not like you’re going to get a say in what they tell you to do.”  
  
The words sent a chill down Alma’s spine. _‘What they tell me to do?’_ he wondered. What…what would they make him do?  
  
“So, you have a name I can call you?”  
  
Alma nodded. He shifted a bit as he pulled his cloak close. “It’s Alma,” he answered. “Um…what’s yours?”  
  
“Tokusa.”  
  
Alma silently repeated the name to himself. Questioningly, he looked over at Tokusa. “Do you know where they are?” he asked, unable to repress the unease in his voice. “Those three people…”  
  
“They’re somewhere. Could be back any minute.” Somewhat warningly, Tokusa met Alma’s gaze. “Don’t try to run off. You may have some of your humanity left, but piss them off and they can remove it. You don’t want that to happen.”  
  
“What?” Alma nearly choked, anxiety returning. “Wh-why? What happens if they do that?”  
  
Tokusa shrugged. “You become an uncontrollable monster,” he stated, the response almost nonchalant. “You’ll catch on. Just do exactly as they tell you to and they’ll let you keep your human thoughts a bit longer. Not that they won’t do it eventually. The Noah aren’t exactly merciful.”  
  
 _‘The Noah?_ ’ The name wasn’t one he recognized immediately, but his focus lingered on the rest of Tokusa’s word. Alma’s stomach churned, his heart palpitating nervously. “I…I really have to…?”  
  
He trailed off, the reality of the situation once more crashing down onto him. A monster. A hybrid. For whatever reason, those three strangers – the _Noah_ , he recalled – had decided to use Alma for something, and he wasn’t sure what. Tokusa wasn’t giving him a detailed explanation and some small, intuitive part of Alma couldn’t help but feel that maybe he didn’t want to know.  
  
He didn’t want to be stuck like this, either.  
  
Biting his lip, Alma rubbed his wrist. If he was now part akuma-  
  
He stilled. As he rubbed his wrist, he had noticed the odd knobbiness, but something else was off. His wrist felt bare and he lowered his hand a bit further down his forearm.  
  
His bracelet was gone.  
  
Alma’s heart dropped, and he abruptly forgot everything else. Panicking, he looked around, running his hands through the grass.  
  
The bracelet. The lotus bracelet from _Kanda_ -  
  
Dismay quickly befell Alma. He looked back at Tokusa. “Have you seen a bracelet?” he asked. “It’s gold and it has a lotus charm?”  
  
Tokusa blinked, completely perplexed. “Um, no.”  
  
Alma’s expression fell, crumbling into apprehension. He tried to search the grass a bit more, but to no avail. Silently, Alma realized that the bracelet was likely gone.  
  
Disappointment swelled in his chest. He realized it must have been silly – with everything that had happened, a piece of jewelry should have been the last of Alma’s worries. But, it had been special and it had been from Kanda…  
  
 _“This way you’ll have a lotus…since you like them so much.”_  
  
Alma clasped at his wrist tightly. He was being stupid – when leaving, he had told himself the bracelet meant nothing. That Kanda had only gotten it for him on a whim. Yet, Alma had clung to it while departing the castle, unable to tear it off and throw it away. Foolishly, Alma realized he had never wanted to get rid of it. Because regardless of what had happened, he still cared about Kanda – and it was the one reminder that maybe for once, Alma wasn’t worthless.  
  
Of course, Alma should have known that even he would never be allowed that solace.  
  
Crestfallen, he sat back against the wall. His tail curled around him, slithering into his line of sight. His eyes stung a little, but he inhaled shallowly. He was so tired and he didn’t want to cry again, yet his vision blurred regardless.  
  
He hated it. He hated it all so much.  
  
Tokusa watched him warily. He hadn’t moved, eying Alma. When Tokusa was certain that he wasn’t going to breakdown, he spoke. “The moon should come back tomorrow. When it does, I can show you how to shift.”  
  
Alma sniffed, sucking in another small breath. “What?”  
  
“Shifting,” Tokusa repeated. “I can’t show you now because there’s no moonlight. But tomorrow I can. It’ll make this a little more bearable.”  
  
Alma blinked. He nodded slowly, not sure how else to respond. “O…okay.”  
  
Tokusa stood up, glancing at the sky. “It’ll be sunrise soon.” He turned to Alma, tone warning. “We’ll have to go back into the ruins. No one ever comes out here, but we can’t risk any people seeing us. Especially exorcists.”  
  
Alma stilled. He hadn’t thought about if other people saw them, let alone exorcists. Despite this, denial once more gripped him. “But we’re not like the akuma that attack people – you said we still have our humanity, right?” His words were desperate and almost pitiful. “What if we asked for help-“  
  
“ _Don’t_.”  
  
Alma fell silent. He blinked in confusion as he looked at Tokusa. “But-“  
  
“I said _don’t_.” Tokusa’s words were low and cold. He glared at Alma icily. “Don’t try to run off. Don’t try to find anyone. Or do you need to look back at your reflection to remember why?”  
  
Alma flinched at the question. Too easily, he recalled seeing himself in the lake – and the unsightly thing he had become.  
  
Tokusa didn’t wait for him to say anything before continuing. “Don’t be stupid. Anyone sees you and they’ll run screaming. If it’s an exorcist, they won’t hesitate to kill you.” His expression darkened, red eyes distant. “We belong to the Noah now. Leaving isn’t an option.”  
  
He didn’t say anything else as he walked past Alma, heading into the ruins.  
  
Alma stared, completely at a loss. He remained outside, alone and on the ground as the silence of the forest encompassed him. Turning, he looked back out onto the lake. The sky was still dark as stars gleamed above; in the distance, Alma saw several swans on the water.  
  
Despite Tokusa’s instructions, he stayed outside a little bit longer, his heart heavier than he could ever remember it being.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve been itching to post this chapter for a while. I know Alma wasn’t seen in the last one and a few people had asked about what happened to him - hopefully the wait was worth it. Like I mentioned previously, I had been planning to give him an akuma curse (swans still make a cameo since ahaha Swan Lake storyline XD). I actually rewrote how Alma was cursed several times (in the original draft of chapter 13, he woke up already cursed and was with the Noah when he found out). Overall, I was much more satisfied with this version. 
> 
> Tokusa is another character I wanted to bring into this as well, both for plot reasons and also it just felt like a nod to canon. He sort of has his own storyline in this fic, though it’ll definitely be more a subplot. (I also didn’t want Alma to be cursed alone - I’ve made him suffer so much already and at least there’s some company. ;__; )
> 
> As for Kanda and Lavi, they show up briefly in this chapter, both trying to make sense of things in their own way. I realize not too much happens with them in this chapter, as it’s mostly some setup for things to take place in the next few chapters. :3
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this update. <3 Any comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!


	16. Things Unearthed

Dawn broke in the east, the sky shifting from onyx and indigo to plum and magenta. The faintest glow of sunlight lingered on the horizon, a band of light barely grazing against the treetops of the forest. The earth was damp as morning dew clung to grass, crystalline droplets gleaming in what was left of the starlight.  
  
Tokusa kept to the shadows of the ruins. He never risked being out during the daylight – not of his own accord. While it was unlikely any humans would wander into such a deep part of the forest, he didn’t like to bait chance. It didn’t matter that he could still speak or that he still held onto any remnants of his human thoughts – he would be a monster in the eyes of anyone else.   
  
He stole a glance outside, leaning against the damp stone walls just near the crumbling exit. Behind him, his sensitive ears detected the gentle, rhythmic breaths that spilled from the new, partially turned akuma – _Alma_ , Tokusa recalled. He glimpsed back behind him and saw Alma lying on his side, wrapped up in his cloak and having fallen asleep.  
  
Tokusa turned around. He wasn’t surprised that Alma had fallen asleep – the first few days after being infected with dark matter were always draining. In time, he wouldn’t need much sleep anymore. Tokusa barely ever slept a wink now.  
  
His red eyes remained weary, a distant look festering in them. Tokusa hadn’t really bothered to keep track of how long it had been. After he had stopped sleeping, time started to blur together; days melted into nights and nights into day. Keeping track was tiring and there was really no point. Sometimes, he wondered if there was a point to anything anymore.  
  
A breeze brushed against his skin, his tail twitching. Alertness washed over Tokusa as he scanned his surroundings outside; even without seeing anything, he knew someone was near. One of _them_.  
  
Without warning, the whites of his eyes turned red, glowing and bright. He stepped forward onto the steps leading outside, his body naturally tensing and his claws extending from his fingertips.  
  
“Don’t get too excited.”  
  
Tokusa turned to his left, toward the forest. Road stood against the edge of the ruins, leaning against the corner and far too close for Tokusa’s liking. His eyes continued to glow as he glared at her coolly.  
  
Road giggled as she cupped her own face with her hands. “Oh, I’m so _scared_.” Her tone was taunting as she smiled at Tokusa, amber eyes eerily bright. “You should know by now it’d take much more than that to frighten me.”  
  
The glow in his eyes faded, the whites returning to normal. Tokua’s glare never wavered as stared at her – just before he saw Wisely approach from around the corner. However, he didn’t see Tyki anywhere.  
  
Wisely didn’t say anything as he walked past Tokusa. He only spared a glance in the akuma’s direction, a somewhat haughty look in his eyes before he moved forward and headed into the ruins – straight to where Alma was.  
  
Tokusa’s eyes narrowed. “He’s sleeping,” he spoke, tone almost warning. “His body hasn’t adjusted yet.”  
  
Wisely turned back, gaze unimpressed as he made eye contact. A sharp, condescending look glimmered in his eyes. “I know that. Now shut up and worry about yourself.”  
  
Road giggled again. “Wisely has to check on some things,” she said, her smile never once wavering. “You should know that – you’ve been through this before.”  
  
The words were spoken pointedly; hearing them felt like a knife skating across Tokusa’s neck, torturously dangerous as it grazed something terribly vulnerable. Instinctively, he clamped his mouth shut; he wasn’t stupid enough to miss the warning that had been so carefully concealed in Road’s words.  
  
Road hummed. “Tyki’s out right now, but he’ll be back soon,” she said. “He’s been keeping an eye on things in the city, as well as the exorcists who have been patrolling the area.”  
  
“And?” Tokusa didn’t dare to lock gazes with Road as he forced his tone to be casual. “What about them?”  
  
“They’ve started to come more into the forest – they’ll probably come a bit farther today. Hoping to see something.” Road’s smile widened, her golden eyes dangerously alight in the glow of daybreak. “And we think it’s time to give them something to look forward to.”  
  
As soon as the words left her lips, Tokusa tensed. His heartbeat quickened, palpitating in his chest as a cold, icy sensation befell him.   
  
Road noticed immediately, a look of delight sparking in her smile. “Don’t worry – I have very specific instructions on what I want you to do. It won’t be too difficult.”  
  
Tokusa’s jaw tightened. He never once dared to look at Road. “You told me to stay here to watch _him_ ,” he hissed, as he nodded back toward where Alma was inside the ruins. “You told me not to-“  
  
He cut off as a searing pain rippled through his arm, the blood in his veins turning acidic as his muscles twisted and pulled. Eyes widening, Tokusa lost his balance and fell to his knees, gripping his left arm as it shuddered and shifted. The skin turned colorless, the bones cracking as they extended, his arm lengthening into a grotesque caricature of what it had been seconds before.  
  
Teeth gritted, Tokusa tried to fight it. He tried to swallow the pain as he locked his mouth shut.  
  
Road took a step forward quietly. Her smile had softened as she stared down at Tokusa before finally crouching down in front of him as she rested her chin in her palm. Her gaze had almost turned contemplative as she tilted her head to the side, a bemused glint in her eyes. “You should know by now you can’t fight it,” she spoke, tone almost gentle. “You already have so much darkness inside you – we only have to snap our fingers if we want to trigger it.”  
  
Tokusa didn’t say anything. His breaths were shallow as he tried to calm himself, desperate to keep control. To keep something.  
  
“Just remember,” Road reminded him. “Do as we say, and we’ll let you keep your humanity. You wouldn’t want to end up like Goushi, would you?”  
  
He stiffened, the mere mention of his former comrade more than enough to keep him silent.  
  
Road’s lips quirked back up. “Thought so.” She leaned in close, her voice low as she spoke. “Now, we just need you to do something…”  
  
Tokusa forced himself to keep silent as he listened.   
  
  


* * *

  
  
The next day felt strangely dull to Kanda. He was half-tempted to say it felt normal, but that didn’t feel quite right. He was doing what was expected of him, attending a meeting with the advisors and acting as his aunt had requested. The meeting was drab, though; despite Kanda’s agreement to comply he didn’t feel any more invested than he had before. Everything was just monotonous. Mechanical.  
  
Kanda tried to make an effort – at least in terms of doing the bare minimum. The advisors made it easy in that they never seemed to shut up long enough for anyone else to get a word in. He merely had to occasionally make eye contact to look as though he were paying attention before his mind inevitably wandered; it was terribly easy for such to happen. Economics, politics. They were dry topics, though ones that Kanda would have to be more invested in sooner or later.  
  
He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed. The advisors were talking about the Midsummer Celebration – something that was swiftly approaching just a little over a week away. Kanda admittedly hadn’t given it much thought. With everything going on, a social event had been the last of Kanda’s worries. In fact, he wasn’t sure why it was still being held. With the akuma attacks going on, was it really even warranted?  
  
“Have any invitations been sent outside of Ilveria?” one of the advisors asked.  
  
“A few,” Anita responded. “In light of current circumstances, we have sent follow-up letters to make any recipients aware of the recent akuma activity. We’ve received no responses as of yet.”  
  
Kanda grumbled under his breath. “Just cancel the stupid thing.”  
  
His words were quiet enough that no one seemed to have heard – at least, with the exception of Anita. Her dark eyes flickered to Kanda somewhat pointedly, though she didn’t comment on his input.  
  
Kanda thought he’d gone unheard, until an advisor spoke – a woman seated across from Kanda. She glanced at Anita curiously. “Is it wise to be holding it as planned? With everything going on?”  
  
Kanda glanced up. For a fleeting second, he prayed the concern would hold some weight.  
  
His hopes were quickly dashed as Anita spoke. “We considered it, but it potentially would cause alarm among everyone. We don’t want to cause any unnecessary panic. As long as we take extra precautions, it should be fine to proceed. Mahoja is working with the guards now.”  
  
The advisor nodded, satisfied with the response.  
  
They continued onto the next agenda item and Kanda quickly stole a glance at the clock on the wall. The meeting had been going on for an hour and a half already, and he was ready to throw himself out the window. How did these people do it? Were they really going to expect him to put up with this _all_ day?  
  
He exhaled heavily through his nose. He was tired and itching to stand, but tried to distract himself from his discomfort by glancing around the room. Some of the advisors also looked weary, which he hoped was a good sign; Anita was usually skilled in reading the room and would hopefully adjourn the meeting soon.   
  
Legory sat across from Kanda. He looked a bit bored, but periodically commented. Once again, Kanda wasn’t sure why he had to be at the whole meeting. He had asked Anita early on and she said it was for one of their items of discussion, but couldn’t he have come in later?  
  
“The next item is about debt collection – we never circled back to it fully,” one of the advisors started. “Last we left off, we had discussed the addition of new terms. As of now, we have interest rates in place – but they’re small, and can still place the lender at risk if something falls through. Such as with a business.”  
  
Anita nodded, though her gaze remained a bit wary. She turned to Legory. “We were informed Liorea was taking steps to handle this – can you let us know more about what your policies are?”  
  
As soon as the conversation turned, Kanda grew alert. His gaze flickered to Legory across the table.  
  
Legory’s focus remained on Anita. “It’s an addition we added some time ago. Along with interest, any unpaid debt is required to pass on to the next of kin if they are for any reason unable to pay. Whether it’s death, illness.” Legory waved his hand somewhat flippantly. “Before we had it in place, the losses were impacting the kingdom’s finances. Especially considering this extended beyond business matters. It’s also a route we take for those who have been caught for theft – if they don’t need to be jailed, that is.”  
  
As the duke spoke, Kanda’s muscles tensed. He remembered this bullshit coming up in one of the meetings a week ago – right before the Lioreans had arrived. And he also remembered that Alma’s situation had been the result of this law.  
  
A debt. Alma had had a debt because of his mother – because she had stolen from Legory’s family so she could get him the medical treatment he needed so he wouldn’t die as some sickly child. But something had happened to her, and Alma ended up shouldered with the repercussions.  
  
 _“I can’t leave until it’s paid.”_  
  
His fist tightened into a ball as he recalled the conversation. Alma had been so ashamed when he told Kanda, and he had been so dejected about it…  
  
“We haven’t had too many issues with debt collection, but it may not hurt to put something similar in place,” an advisor suggested. “It may deter any unnecessary requests. As well as create a backup in case there is a death involved, unless Your Majesty disagrees?”  
  
Anita wavered, expression hesitant. The advisor had addressed her directly, so she had to react swiftly with being so put on the spot.  
  
Legory spoke up, spying her reservation. “If anything, it’s only stabilized everyone in Liorea. We’d strongly encourage it-“  
  
Kanda couldn’t listen to him anymore – and he couldn’t keep silent. “It’s a _terrible_ idea.” He cut off Legory abruptly, startling everyone in the meeting hall. “Someone can’t pay a debt and it goes to the next of kin? What if _they_ can’t pay it?”  
  
Anita turned, somewhat taken aback by the way Kanda so swiftly jumped into the discussion. She didn’t get a chance to say anything before Legory spoke up.  
  
“We handle it on a case-by-case basis if it comes to that.” His words were short as the faintest hint of irritation gleamed in his eyes. However, Legory was careful to keep himself composed. “The lenders cannot be expected to wipe the slate clean if someone fails to keep up. It’s perfectly logical to require the next closest relation to take it on.”  
  
“Yeah? And what if they’re not in a position to do so?” Kanda challenged. His tone was growing heated, but he didn’t think to try to calm himself. “What if they’re a _child_? You’re going to set them up for fucking servitude for something they have no control over!“  
  
The accusation took Legory by surprise. He balked, not having expected to be spoken to such a way; offense brimmed in his eyes, his expression turning hard. “It’s unfortunate to think of such a thing happening, but then perhaps the parents should think more about their decisions. If anything, it’ll teach them _not_ to repeat the same mistakes.“  
  
Kanda saw red, the rest of his self-control evaporating like smoke. “That’s _bullshit-_!”  
  
“ _Enough!”_   
  
The room fell silent – so much that a pin dropping would have been cacophonic. Anita had raised her voice more than normal, quieting the quarrel before it could escalate any further. She remained composed, but her expression was stern, dark eyes unyielding as she glanced between both Kanda and Legory.  
  
“This is something we shouldn’t make a decision on yet.” Anita kept her words even, chosen with careful diplomacy as she looked toward Legory. “We appreciate your insight on this – thank you.”  
  
Legory’s lips pressed into a thin line, but he only nodded his head. His gaze flickered to Kanda, eyes frostier than a winter storm.  
  
Anita moved the conversation along quickly. “Let’s adjourn – we’ve all been seated long enough. I’m sure everyone would like a reprieve.”  
  
The advisors nodded in agreement, chairs scratching against the floor as they stood. Despite Anita’s dismissal, the air in the meeting hall felt awkward, the remnants of tension lingering in the air like a slowly spreading infection. The advisors quickly busied themselves, breaking off into pockets of conversations while others left the room entirely. Hushed whispers transpired, several flummoxed glances making their way back to Kanda.  
  
Kanda stood. After the heated exchange, he could feel himself still reeling and knew he needed to get out of the meeting hall. He pushed his chair back in swiftly, but he wasn’t fast enough before his aunt addressed him.  
  
“ _Yuu_.”  
  
Kanda’s jaw clenched and he sucked in a breath. He couldn’t even act like he hadn’t heard her – not with the tone of her voice. Bracing himself, he turned around as he fought to keep his voice low and even. “What?”  
  
Anita frowned, her slim brows pinched together and refined features marred by frustration. She stood as she walked up to Kanda. “Yuu, you cannot _speak_ that way.” She was careful to keep her voice low, so no one else left in the hall would hear. A few advisors had lingered and Legory was still across the table. “What on earth has gotten into you? You’ve never acted this way before in front of the advisors, let alone regarding such a topic.”  
  
Kanda sneered under his breath and broke eye contact as he crossed his arms. His chest felt tight, but he ignored it – just as he ignored the way his aunt’s obvious concern and disappointment rubbed into him like salt in an open wound. “You can’t tell me you fucking agreed with what he was saying…”  
  
“No, I didn’t – I don’t like the idea of creating undue burden on others. But, Yuu, you cannot use that language and tone. Not at these meetings.” Her voice softened as worry glimmered in her eyes, her previous hardness fracturing. “I don’t understand – you’ve never been this invested in such affairs before. Has something happened?”  
  
Kanda stiffened. The question had been unusually hard to hear, his heart twisting up in grief as Alma’s face flashed through his mind. Alma and his sweet smile. Alma and his stupidly innocent curiosity to wander around the city and look at things…  
  
Stubbornly, Kanda avoided Anita’s gaze and didn’t respond.  
  
Anita sighed, the sound heavy and defeated. “Yuu, please apologize to Duke Legory. You were out of line to speak in such a way.”  
  
Kanda’s head whipped back, eyes raging with disgust. Was she serious? Did she actually want him to apologize to _Legory_? Kanda was ready to dig his heels as deeply into the earth as possible. Because there was no way that he would give that man an apology – not when the pompous jerk had made Alma so _miserable_.  
  
Before he could argue, his attention shifted. Legory had also stood and was walking over – right to where Kanda and Anita were. Internally, Kanda cursed.  
  
Legory stopped just before them. His light brown eyes glanced between the two, his gaze turning icy as he looked at Kanda from behind his glasses.   
  
Anita spoke up. “Duke Legory.” She glanced toward Kanda, sparing her nephew a warning glance. “We wanted to apologize for how the tone in the meeting shifted – this topic is something of a sensitive one.”  
  
Legory nodded, though his attention once more lingered to Kanda, the faintest hint of something unpleasant swimming inside. “I didn’t realize this was such a delicate topic in your kingdom,” he stated, words calm yet holding a twinge of disapproval. He made eye contact with Kanda directly. “Nor did I expect such a strong aversion to it.”  
  
Kanda glared. “I don’t believe in punishing people for what they didn’t do,” he spoke, words low.  
  
Legory frowned. “And what sort of punishment would this be? As I explained before, it’s to ensure we don’t deplete resources and people are aware of the terms.”  
  
Kanda’s eyes hardened, and he was tempted to snap. _‘Alma wasn’t aware,’_ he wanted to shout. _‘Alma didn’t get a_ choice _.’_  
  
However, Kanda caught a glimpse of Anita in his peripheral, her gaze warning.   
  
Shackling his anger, Kanda forced himself to bite his tongue. He needed to calm down and to cool off – he needed to walk away. He was too angry and he couldn’t stop thinking about Alma. He couldn’t think _rationally_.  
  
“I have to go somewhere,” Kanda finally spoke, the lie pushed through his lips. “Excuse me.”  
  
He didn’t take any chances and left after that, exiting the meeting hall. He didn’t stop walking until he was well down the corridor, a safe distance away everyone. Once he turned the corner, he leaned against a marble pillar for relief, a heavy breath escaping him. He ran his hands through his hair. _‘Fuck…’_  
  
He lowered his hand as it slipped into his pocket. Inside, he fingered a thin chain – Alma’s bracelet. Without pulling it out, he felt the smooth, moonstone lotus charm and rubbed his fingers over it, a small bit of relief befalling him. Relief and longing.  
  
A moment passed and Kanda pushed himself off the pillar. He caught sight of a north-facing window and approached it, glancing outside. Guards were stationed near the front and Kanda caught sight of Marie and Tiedoll speaking to several of the guards.   
  
Kanda frowned. He realized they were probably going on a patrol soon – one that he wouldn’t be allowed on. The knowledge left a bitter taste in his mouth; even with this being his new “normal”, Kanda harbored a visceral dislike toward it. Being stuck in a stuffy meeting room most of the day while something strange was happening with the akuma…  
  
 _“This reminds me of what happened with Izo…”_  
  
Memories from the previous night slipped into his thoughts, a frown tugging at Kanda’s lips. During the meeting, he had forgotten about the conversation he had overheard between Anita and Mahoja – the one regarding his father. At first, Kanda thought it may have just been more of his aunt’s fretting. But, something that Mahoja had said lingered in his thoughts.  
  
 _“We still don’t know if it’s the same situation.”_  
  
His brow furrowed, scowl deepening. What had Mahoja meant? His father had been killed by an akuma – one that had killed another exorcist that same night. It had been a horrific event, but as far as Kanda had known there had never been any other information on what happened.   
  
So, why would Mahoja have said that?  
  
Restlessness twitched in Kanda’s veins. He wasn’t sure what it was – if he were merely looking for a reason to stay involved in exorcism or if it were something else. But something dark loomed in the back of his mind – something that wouldn’t let him rest.  
  
Turning from the window, Kanda left to find the other exorcists.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Guards monitored the gatehouse, several stationed in various spaces. More traffic passed through than normal; horse-drawn carts pulled through with different goods and supplies from vendors, all of which needed to be inspected before being brought to the castle. While it was usually for deliveries to be made, the amount had increased. With the Midsummer Celebration approaching, additional items would be needed in preparation for the event.  
  
Tiedoll glanced toward the gatehouse, taking note of another arrival – a merchant delivering some fabrics and textiles. A group of guards intercepted the merchant before directing him where to go.  
  
Marie walked up to Tiedoll as they remained outside of the steps that led into the castle. “It’s busy today,” Marie noted. “I haven’t heard this much traffic since the examination.”  
  
“It looks like they’re moving forward with the Midsummer Celebration. I wasn’t sure if they would – Queen Anita had been debating it.” Tiedoll turned back to Marie. “But, I think she doesn’t want the people to worry. Canceling it would probably cause unease.”  
  
Marie nodded in understanding. “It makes sense,” he said. “The horses are being readied now – we should be able to leave in a few minutes.”  
  
“Good. Allen should be joining us soon.”  
  
A curious look flickered across Marie’s expression. “He’s still coming?”  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “While he’s here, Allen offered to accompany us on patrols. He may not be a part of our unit, but he is a skilled exorcist – it certainly won’t hurt to have the extra backup.”  
  
“That’s true.” Marie paused somewhat thoughtfully. “We’ll be going further into the woods today?”  
  
“We will – the last few outings we haven’t found any signs of akuma activity.” A small sigh escaped Tiedoll, his gaze turning pensive. “Honestly, I can’t help but feel a bit worried…I’d like to believe it’s a good sign, but-“  
  
The exorcist general stopped speaking. In his peripheral, he saw someone exit the front doors of the castle – Kanda. He was dressed somewhat a bit more finely than normal; Kanda often preferred plainer clothing to train in. But Tiedoll recalled that the prince was becoming more involved in things and was likely being nudged to dress more the part.  
  
Tiedoll could only imagine Kanda hated it – Kanda had hated dressing nicely ever since he was a child.  
  
Marie turned as he heard Kanda approach. “Kanda?”  
  
Kanda frowned, crossing his arms. “Why do you sound so surprised?”  
  
“We were under the impression you were in a meeting,” Tiedoll answered. He looked at Kanda somewhat curiously. “Did it go well?”  
  
Kanda stiffened slightly. A look of unease flashed across his expression, though he swiftly repressed it as he broke eye contact. A stormy look brewed in his eyes as he answered. “It was fine,” he spoke, words low and terse. “Just another pointless meeting.”  
  
Tiedoll paused. Based off Kanda’s response and nonverbal cues, he was inclined to believe that the meeting had gone poorly. Asking at such a time wouldn’t have been appropriate, though – Kanda wouldn’t dare to open up about what had happened in such a public space, especially with the meeting so fresh in his memory.  
  
“I see.” Tiedoll kept his tone neutral, not pushing the topic any further. “Marie and I were just getting ready to go out on a patrol – Allen will be coming with us.”  
  
Hearing this, Kanda looked up. A scowl was on his face. “You’re taking the beansprout?”  
  
Tiedoll clicked his tongue as he heard the disapproval in the prince’s tone. “Now, Kanda, he has a name – and he’s very skilled. I heard he was even a challenge for you in training.”  
  
Kanda’s ears burned, the memory of losing to Allen in their first spar still a sting to his ego. He looked away and sneered. “I was tired – that was right before the examination.”  
  
 _‘Right before…’  
  
_ Abruptly, Kanda thought more about that day – the day he had gone into the city with Alma. He quickly swallowed the sharp pain in his chest and focused on the conversation at present.  
  
Tiedoll smiled gently. “I’m sure that’s what it was.”  
  
Kanda glanced at Tiedoll. As he did, he recalled what he had overheard Anita and Mahoja discussing the previous night. Like a freshly watered weed, his curiosity rooted itself a bit deeper into his mind; he wanted to ask Tiedoll if he knew anything. If he might have suspected anything-  
  
Before he could vocalize such, someone else started down the castle steps. Kanda fell silent.  
  
Tiedoll looked behind Kanda and smiled. “Allen – it’s good to see you.”   
  
Kanda looked back. Allen had just walked over, cloaked and ready to leave, his white hair pulled back at the nape of his neck. He smiled politely. “Thanks – I’m glad to be coming along.”  
  
Kanda eyed Allen for a second. As he did, he took note of the odd scar that stretched down the left side of his face – glaringly red and unnatural. He had never seen anything like it and had initially wondered if it were the result of Allen’s innocence. Kanda had never asked, though.  
  
“We’ll be going a bit farther into the woods today, so it’s appreciated,” Tiedoll said. “I’m not certain if we’ll come across anything, but you can never be too sure.”  
  
Kanda turned back to Tiedoll and Marie. “How much farther are you going?”  
  
Marie paused and angled his face toward Tiedoll. “What were you thinking?”  
  
“It depends.” Tiedoll’s expression grew contemplative as he brought his fingers to his chin. “If we come across a trail of any kind, we can follow that. It’s been quiet, but it’s worrisome that akuma is still out there.”  
  
Allen’s gaze turned serious. “Something is out there,” he said. “Before it attacked, we saw something up ahead – it looked like someone. But they were cloaked and it was difficult to see.”  
  
Marie hummed. “I remember you saying this before – but couldn’t it have been an akuma? They have the potential to shapeshift.”  
  
“I don’t know,” Allen admitted, his voice growing wary and uncertain. “It…I’m not sure if it was. The akuma came from somewhere else while the figure was in sight – until the smoke blocked everything.”  
  
As Allen spoke, Kanda turned to him sharply. A frown tugged at his lips – he had heard some details of the attack. That the group had seen a figure before an akuma appeared. Kanda had assumed that the figure and the akuma had been the same, but the possibility of there being someone else – _something else_ – involved? Why hadn’t he heard this sooner?  
  
 _‘Did they take Alma?’_  
  
The thought slipped into his mind, Kanda’s pulse quickening. God, he hated not knowing.  
  
The air grew tense. Neither Tiedoll nor Marie spoke, both also reflecting on Allen’s suggestion. Tiedoll in particular seemed wary, as he glanced toward Kanda and noted the prince’s interest.  
  
Looking back between Allen and Marie, Tiedoll spoke. “Unfortunately, we can’t be certain of what happened – which is why we’ll be going further into the woods today.”  
  
Allen and Marie nodded.  
  
They didn’t get a chance to converse any longer, as three horses were brought out. The grooms handed them off as Tiedoll, Marie, and Allen took the reins of their designated horses.  
  
Kanda intercepted Tiedoll before he could mount his horse. “Tiedoll.”  
  
The general stopped. He turned back to Kanda, gaze somewhat inquisitive. “Yes?”  
  
Kanda hesitated. His throat felt as though it had suddenly closed up and he took a small breath. He reminded himself of the conversation he had overheard. “Last night I heard something,” he said, keeping his voice lower so no one else would hear. “About my father.”  
  
Tiedoll blinked, for a moment appearing taken aback. He quickly caught himself, though, and collected himself.  
  
Kanda hadn’t missed the change. “Do you know if anything unusual happened during the attack that killed him?” he asked, never once breaking eye contact. “You were there – did you see anything?”  
  
Tiedoll didn’t speak at first. His gaze had turned pensive, expression oddly distant. He hummed. “May I ask what spurned this on?”  
  
Kanda frowned, a muscle twitching at the response. “That’s not an answer.”  
  
Tiedoll sighed. “No – no, it isn’t.” He glanced toward the others before he returned his focus to Kanda, voice growing quiet. “But you must be wary of how much you’re investing yourself in this. You know you’re no longer acting as an active exorcist.”  
  
His tone carried a warning edge, causing Kanda’s agitation to fester. Tiedoll was being frustratingly enigmatic, which was unlike him; why couldn’t he just give a straight answer? Kanda’s impatience showed, his eyes burning with agitation. “Tiedoll, if you _know_ something-“  
  
“Kanda.” Tiedoll’s tone was hushed, causing the prince to stop. Nearby, Allen and Marie waited, both saddled on their horses as they looked over questioningly.   
  
Tiedoll ignored them as he focused on Kanda. “The archives contain documentation of all past attacks,” he whispered, words sounding more serious. “Don’t let anyone know I reminded you.”  
  
Kanda stared, perplexed at first. The exorcist general gave him a strangely knowing look though before he mounted his horse, cueing it as he took leave. The other exorcists followed suit, though Allen paused, just as he glanced back at Kanda.   
  
“If we find anything, we’ll let you know,” he offered.  
  
Kanda sneered. “ _If_ you find anything…”  
  
Allen didn’t speak. His gaze rested on Kanda a moment longer before he turned, quickly catching up with Tiedoll and Marie as they left through the gates.  
  
Kanda watched as they rode out of sight, his mind lingering on what Tiedoll had told him. _‘The archives…’_  
  
Something rippled down his spine. Kanda wasn’t sure what it was – he had known there were archives, but had never thought to look through them in depth. Maybe because he had always assumed he had been told everything he needed to know about what had happened. His father. Akuma. He had been instructed on it all from a young age, but with how Tiedoll had spoken…  
  
Turning, Kanda went back inside.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
The horses trotted through the forest, their gait even and steady. The air was cool and smelled of moss, a dampness lingering in the air despite the fact that it hadn’t rained for several days. Clouds spotted the sky overhead as they periodically broke apart the sunlight, the lush leaves on tree branches providing additional shade.  
  
Allen looked around, his silver eyes scanning their surroundings. The group had stuck to the main road as they wandered into the forest. An unsettling tingle of familiarity grazed against Allen as they moved on – the main road was the very one he and the rest of the Lioreans had used only days ago. The very one that led to the site of the attack. Allen hadn’t been on the road this since then.  
  
Tiedoll and Marie rode a bit ahead, while Allen was just behind them.   
  
Marie turned his face as he spoke to Tiedoll. “Did you have somewhere specific you wanted to scout in mind?”  
  
Tiedoll hummed. “I wanted to go back to the site of the attack – it’s been a few days, so I think it’d be wise to check if anything has changed. After that, we can work out way back to scouting the forest outskirts where it breaks off into the fields.”  
  
“Has anyone reported any sightings or activity?” Allen asked.  
  
“No, but I’d rather not wait until something is reported to find it,” Tiedoll explained.   
  
Allen nodded.   
  
Tiedoll glanced back toward Allen. “How is it in Liorea? I only ever had the pleasure of visiting once years ago, but it’s been some time.”  
  
Allen offered a small smile. “I’m not sure how much has changed since then, but it’s alright,” he answered. “In terms of safety, it’s been well-off. The wall helps to keep any akuma out.”  
  
“Ah, that’s right. Kanda had brought that up with us not too long ago when discussing security measures.”  
  
“He seems really invested in making sure Ilveria is protected.” Allen’s observation was given in thought as he pondered his own interactions with the prince. While he was brusque and at times what many would have considered impolite, he did appear to have a strong resolve in actively ensuring the kingdom was safe. “He’s really no longer active as an exorcist, though?”  
  
Tiedoll paused. “Not for the time being. Whether that changes will depend on how things progress.”  
  
Allen’s lips pressed together. The response had been a little vague, but it wasn’t his place to press; he understood well enough that a lot of the decision had to do with Kanda’s safety. Lavi had explained that much to Allen and it made sense. Kanda was the only heir – and the kingdom couldn’t afford to lose their future ruler.  
  
 _‘But also…’_ A small frown tugged at Allen’s mouth. He recalled that terrible day when the attack had taken place – something that now felt like a surreal and distant memory. Allen remembered the Ilverians arriving after the akuma disappeared. He remembered Kanda being with them and running off into the woods without warning and calling Alma’s name.  
  
Allen clung to the reins of his horse, gaze deeply contemplative. He hadn’t known that Kanda had crossed paths with Alma, but thinking back on how Alma had acted during and following the examination…  
  
Something had happened. Allen wasn’t sure what – he hadn’t brought this up to Lavi, not sure if it even would have been worth discussing. Following the events, Kanda had been scarce and Allen hadn’t really seen him around. Not to mention, they didn’t really speak to begin with. _‘He really seems like he cared about Alma.’_  
  
Allen shook the thoughts from his head, trying to discard them. He needed to focus.  
  
“We’re getting close,” Marie said, breaking the silence. “The site of the attack is just up ahead.”  
  
Growing alert, Allen looked up. He took note of their surroundings and realized that Marie was right – just up ahead, he saw the echoes of the recent attack. A few tree branches pushed off to the side of the road, the ground somewhat uneven where several attacks had impacted. It was eerily familiar, yet strikingly different; the sunlight spilled through the foliage overhead, the air still. Allen felt as though he were gazing at a falsified impression, the sight strange to behold.  
  
They slowed to a stop, Marie and Tiedoll getting off their horses first. Marie turned to the exorcist general. “Should we stay together?”  
  
Tiedoll thought as he scanned the area. “We can split up – as long as we’re within earshot of one another, we should be alright.” He turned toward Allen, a thought striking him. “Actually, why don’t you come with me, Allen? We can cover the west side of the road while Marie covers the east.”  
  
Allen blinked, a little surprised. “Alright,” he said, offering a polite smile.   
  
As Allen slid off his horse, Marie started off in one direction. Tiedoll waited for Allen before the Liorean was ready, the two of them walking toward the thick of the forest. Their steps were quiet as they left the main road, the grass soft as it flattened beneath their feet, the forest otherwise quiet.  
  
Allen didn’t say anything at first. He hadn’t actually interacted with Tiedoll too much on his own, though the general seemed kind and good-natured. Still, Allen hadn’t been sure what to expect when Tiedoll asked if he would be willing to ride out with them – it has surprised him, but at the same time, offered some relief. If anything, the patrol would provide Allen a good distraction.  
  
“Thank you for coming out again,” Tiedoll spoke, breaking the silence. “It helps to have some backup.”  
  
Allen smiled. “Of course – honestly, I was a little relieved. It’ll give me something to do.”  
  
Tiedoll chuckled, though the sound was soft and measured. “I’m glad. I know your travels here haven’t exactly gone as planned.” A slight weight clung to his words as he spoke, an almost solemn ring seeping through. However, Tiedoll didn’t linger on the topic as his gaze shifted to Allen inquisitively. “I had been meaning to ask…that marking on your left eye is an aftereffect of your innocence, is it not?”  
  
The question, though asked in polite caution, caused Allen to pause. He blinked, his silvery eyes landing on Tiedoll as he tried to think of a response – but his words momentarily failed him as he recalled the marking on his face.   
  
Tiedoll spoke up again, not having missed Allen’s reservation. “I apologize for my forwardness,” he offered. “It was something I noticed early on.”  
  
Allen shook his head. “No, it’s alright.” He smiled reassuringly. “I don’t get asked about it too often – people usually stare, so I think they’re afraid to ask. I’d rather people be forward about it.”  
  
“They’re probably not sure how to,” Tiedoll offered. “Anything with magic, innocence – it’s still something that is at times very foreign to most people. They see it from afar, but close up it can be jarring.”  
  
“Right.” Allen brushed his bangs aside as they walked a bit farther through the trees. The earth smelled damp, rich green moss climbing the thick trees. As they moved along, Allen couldn’t help but think the forest almost seemed peaceful – or at least it would have, had it not harbored the threat of akuma.  
  
Finally, Allen continued. “It was a side effect – after my innocence was activated,” he explained quietly. “It happened a long time ago, right when Cross found me. I’ve been able to pick up on akumas ever since.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “Your innocence is a parasitic type – it makes sense that it would alter something such as your sight,” he observed. “We haven’t seen too many of those in Ilveria.”  
  
Allen looked back at Tiedoll, gaze somewhat questioning. “Has your unit only ever had equipment types?”  
  
“No – we had one accommodator who was parasitic in the past.” Tiedoll’s tone grew somewhat distant and weary, an almost far-off look blossoming in his eyes. “He was killed the same night as King Izo. After that, it was only Marie and I for some time before we realized Kanda was also an accommodator. Daisya we recruited a few years after.”  
  
Allen nodded. He was a bit curious to hear more about the unit and opened his mouth to speak, but stopped. Just up ahead, something moved – or at least, Allen _thought_ he saw something move. It had been so quick and fleeting-  
  
His eye activated, red and black blossoming into his eye like a drop of blood spreading into water.   
  
Tiedoll noticed immediately. “What is it?”  
  
Allen wavered. He scanned the area with his activated eye, not entirely certain as to what had triggered it. “I’m not sure,” Allen said, a frown on his face. His brow knit together as he looked in another direction. “Something’s nearby-”  
  
Something moved up ahead, Allen turning sharply. “There!”  
  
Tiedoll turned, activating his anti-akuma weapon, rod and cross in hand. His gaze followed Allen’s line of sight before he too saw it: a figure, a silhouette.  
  
In the blink of an eye it was gone.  
  
Tiedoll looked back at Allen. “Find Marie-“  
  
A loud screech cut him off as something flew overhead. Wind blustered over the exorcists, the branches swaying and snapping as the sound of large wings beating filled the air. Allen had to shut his eyes as dirt and debris swirled up, his arm raised as he shielded his face. Carefully, he tried to blink his eyes open as he looked up.  
  
It was fast. The akuma swooped above them at an alarming speed, with Allen just barely able to make out the details of its appearance. It was eerily humanoid, the body almost the same as a person; its arms were abnormally long and knobby, skin dark and colorless like ash. It had a long tail and strangely colored markings on its body, while its face was an echo of a person’s – eyes freakishly glowing red and teeth sharp, green hair pulled to the side as feathery wings burst from its shoulder blades.  
  
Allen recognized the akuma. “That’s the one that attacked us!”  
  
Tiedoll didn’t get a chance to respond. The akuma flew overhead once more, dipping low; it didn’t attack, though, instead nearly knocking the exorcists down with the force of its wings.  
  
A string of melodies broke the air, several threads cutting into the sky. They sliced against one of the akuma’s arms and caught its wrist, the creature hissing as it faltered in its movement.   
  
Allen turned back as he saw Marie, having activated his innocence. Threads extended from the rings as he tried to hold the akuma still-  
  
The akuma ripped its arm back, the string having cut into its wrist. A wound remained before it took its other hand, a collection of dark red energy festering in its palm.   
  
Realizing it was about to attack, Tiedoll slammed his anti-akuma weapon into the ground, the cross and rod glowing as an ivory shield erupted from the earth. “Get behind me!”  
  
Allen and Marie complied, just as the akuma launched its attack. The blast hit them, the shield holding strong as it deflected the impact.  
  
Almost immediately, the air turned silent.  
  
Tiedoll’s gaze turned wary as he kept the shield up a moment longer. “Ready your weapons,” he instructed quietly, before he discarded the shield, the ivory vines unwinding as they sunk back into the earth.  
  
Allen stood up, his innocence having been activated in his left arm. He looked around and blinked.  
  
The akuma was gone.  
  
Marie took a step forward, a frown on his face. He adjusted his earphones as he tried to listen for it.   
  
“Do you hear anything?” Tiedoll asked.  
  
Marie’s frown remained in place. “It’s gone completely quiet. But it couldn’t have just disappeared.”  
  
Allen’s brow furrowed. He glanced around the forest, the trees still and soundless. His left eye remained activated, red and black bleeding into one another as he tried to detect where the akuma may have gone to-  
  
Something flew out of the trees before anyone could blink. Allen didn’t even get a chance to react before the akuma slammed into him, his back skidding across the ground. He grimaced as his body ached and burned from the impact, but tried to focus; in the distance, he heard Tiedoll and Marie shouting his name.  
  
A clawed hand gripped his neck, and Allen grimaced. He opened his eyes just as he came face to face with the akuma, the wretched creature staring him down with those inhumanly red eyes.  
  
Allen stared. He was unable to look away from the akuma’s eyes, which were piercingly scalding to behold. The akuma had an animalistic look; its fangs were bared and its expression twisted into something almost _agonizing_.   
  
Allen wanted to look away, but his left eye glowed, his attention glued to the akuma before he saw something shift-  
  
A person. For a fleeting second, Allen thought it was a person – a translucent mirage of a young man, face wrought with pain. His eyes remained red, though the rest of his appearance was painfully human, clothing oddly familiar. Allen tried to take in as many details as possible, though his focus centered on one thing in particular – two red dots on the man’s forehead.  
  
In the blink of an eye, the image disappeared – just as the akuma shoved itself off of Allen, its large wings beating as it took flight.  
  
“Allen!”  
  
Allen got up quickly as Marie and Tiedoll ran to him. His attention shifted to the sky, just as the akuma flew out of sight.  
  
“Are you alright?” Marie asked.  
  
Allen nodded, though he eyed where the akuma had disappeared to. “Yeah, it…it didn’t do anything to me.” Confusion swarmed in his head as he tried to grapple with what had just happened. The akuma had pinned him to the ground and could have snapped his neck easily – yet it hadn’t done so. “It just…pulled back for no reason.”  
  
“We’re very lucky that’s all it did,” Tiedoll said, voice serious. He turned to Marie. “Can you hear where it went?”  
  
Marie shook his head. “It went northwest, but it’s flown from earshot – it seems like it retreated.”  
  
Allen frowned. An akuma retreating was rare; they often became more agitated and aggressive when faced with innocence. The fact that this akuma had retreated so suddenly didn’t make sense, either. Something wasn’t adding up.  
  
“We should turn back,” Tiedoll said. He looked at Allen, concern in his eyes. “Even if you have no visible injuries, we should make sure there’s no internal damage – that was a brutal impact.”  
  
Allen nodded. He felt fine, but understood the concern.  
  
Marie turned to them. “Let’s start back, then – the horses were tied up, but they’ll be agitated from the attack.”  
  
They nodded in agreement, heading back to the main road. However, Allen paused one last time as he glanced back in the direction that the akuma had flown off in.  
  
Allen forced himself to keep walking, but couldn’t shake the image of the man from his memory.   
  
  


* * *

  
  
There weren’t too many people in the library when Kanda arrived. The head librarian was preoccupied, assisting one of the scholars and too busy to notice the prince’s arrival. Kanda took the opportunity to slip in quietly, making his way back through some of the stacks as he began to glance at the different books. Texts of all sorts lined the shelves, sorted by topic and then by author.   
  
Kanda paused as he looked at one shelf. He glanced at a few titles – all focusing on geography and the terrains of the three kingdoms. Kanda scrunched his nose up in annoyance; he needed to find the section where the archives were kept. He quickly racked his brain as he tried to think of where they would be, but recalled the back portion of the second level – right by the study in the backroom the Bookmen had been using.   
  
Someone came around the corner, causing Kanda to turn. The head librarian had just entered into the aisle; he was an older man with long, white hair that was thinning on his scalp and a slightly unkept beard. He wore light-colored robes and held a focused look, but paused in surprise as he noticed Kanda.   
  
“Oh – Your Highness, I didn’t realize you were here,” the head librarian said. “Were you looking for something?”  
  
“Are the records of past akuma attacks in the archives?” Kanda asked.  
  
The head librarian blinked in surprise. “Oh, yes – it’s kept with all records on innocence. We usually keep it locked up on the second floor and confidential. But the visiting Bookmen were permitted access by the queen regent and I think they were going through those materials-“  
  
“Got it.” Kanda didn’t bother to look back as he turned, leaving the aisle as he navigated his way to the iron staircase that spiraled up to the second level. He climbed it quickly, the second level of the library even quieter than the first. Not a person was in sight, though Kanda imagined that Lavi or Bookman had to have been nearby. Knowing them, they may have already pulled any archival documentation.  
  
He didn’t waste his time wandering the second floor. Kanda knew that Lavi or Bookman (potentially both) would be in the backroom, which had become a second home to them. Kanda admittedly wasn’t even sure how they did it; slaving away over gruelingly dull texts sounded like a hellish fate to suffer through.   
  
The door to the backroom was closed when Kanda found it. He knocked at the door in the chance that Lavi or Bookman were in the midst of something, though no one answered. Frowning, he waited a beat of a second before he opened it, the door clicking heavily as he pushed it aside.  
  
Kanda glimpsed around. The room was a complete disaster. Papers were stacked upon one another haphazardly, books were piled. Several partially lit candles had been blown out as daylight spilled in through the fogged window up above, dust and grime clinging to the ledge.  
  
His nose crinkled in disgust. How could anyone get any work done in such a place? Kanda noticed that Lavi and Bookman weren’t in the room, but he spied a half-finished cup of what seemed to be old coffee on Lavi’s desk.  
  
“Tch.” Kanda grumbled under his breath as he glanced around. He picked up one of the texts on Lavi’s desk and flipped through it, blue eyes scanning the contents. He recognized some of the sketched-in illustrations and quickly realized that it appeared to be a log of innocence – of all the anti-akuma weapons that had been located in Ilveria. Tiedoll’s, Marie’s, Daisya’s…  
  
He paused. He had just come across a page on Mugen, the sword sketched out with copious notes scrawled around the faded illustration. Kanda’s eyes naturally gravitated toward the words as he skimmed the reading. Much of what was written wasn’t necessarily surprising – some attacks were listed, along with some properties. Mugen was discovered in the form of a sword, it was an equipment type…  
  
 _‘Crystal?’_ Kanda did a double take. The word was scrawled under the illustration, but no other explanation was given.  
  
The door opened suddenly, causing Kanda to look up. Lavi just walked in balancing what looked like a fresh cup of coffee and a few journals, his steps clumsy as he maneuvered his way into the study. His emerald eye immediately took note of Kanda, surprise coloring his expression. “Kanda? What are you doing here?”  
  
“Looking for you. Where the hell were you?” He nodded toward the room, disgust lingering in his eyes. “What’s with this room? You guys have it looking like a pigsty.”  
  
“Hey, _hey_.” Lavi put his cup down onto the edge of his desk before setting the journals aside. “It wasn’t exactly clean when we got here, so it’s not entirely our fault if it’s a mess.”  
  
Kanda huffed. He didn’t entirely buy the excuse, but had more important things to focus on. “Do you have the journals on past akuma attacks?” he asked, glancing back to the page on Mugen. He was still holding the log and his attention kept shifting to that word – what the hell was “crystal” supposed to mean?  
  
Lavi paused. He stared as Kanda appeared distracted by the journal, the Bookman attempting to collect himself. “Um, Gramps and I have been going through things,” he said, fighting a hint of wariness that threatened to slip into his tone. “Why?”  
  
“I need to look at something.” Kanda paused, as he noted another illustration following Mugen’s – two crosses in red. A strange nudge of familiarity tugged at Kanda’s memory, but he closed the journal and set it down. “Where did you put it?”  
  
“What’s with the sudden interest? You’ve never cared much for history before,” Lavi said, as he leaned back against the doorframe. He crossed his arms. “Anyways, aren’t you supposed to be focusing on other things right now? Like running the kingdom and navigating politics?”  
  
Kanda’s scowl deepened. “Do you fucking know where it is or _not_?” he questioned, tone turning impatient.   
  
Lavi blinked, somewhat taken aback. “Geez, calm down.” His lighthearted demeanor slowly evaporated as he looked at Kanda somewhat seriously. “I’m only asking because I thought you weren’t supposed to be getting too tangled up in anything involving akuma right now. But let me see if it’s with Gramps’ things.”  
  
Kanda exhaled heavily as Lavi walked across the study. He shuffled through what Kanda assumed was Bookman’s workspace, working his way through the mounds of papers and texts. Staring at it alone was enough to give Kanda a headache.  
  
As Lavi sifted through the items, Kanda’s attention wandered back to the journal he still held. The red crosses seemed so oddly familiar – Kanda knew he had seen them somewhere before, but where?  
  
Lavi stopped looking, having taken a dense journal. He turned back to Kanda, green eye gleaming with an edge of caution. “Here,” he said, as he handed the journal over. “That’s a log of all the attacks – it’s chronologically ordered.”  
  
Kanda took the journal. He flipped it open, not bothering to sit down as he leaned back against the desk, gaze intensely focused as he tore through the entries. He jumped ahead, the documentation going back for years. Attacks, disappearances. Over the years, they were sporadic, though Kanda soon came to the entry that he had been looking for.  
  
Lavi leaned against Bookman’s desk. He eyed Kanda, expression neutral. “What were you looking for?”  
  
Kanda didn’t answer. He was too busy reading through the entry, the account more detailed than he had anticipated. His dark blue eyes scanned the words as he read them quickly, before he finally came across one startling detail.  
  
It felt as though the wind had been knocked from his, his blood turning cold as he sucked in a breath. Kanda’s thoughts had momentarily drawn to a halt, the world turning still as he struggled to process what he had just read.   
  
Lavi hadn’t missed it – he hadn’t missed the look of what could have only been described as _shock_ as it befell the prince. Still clinging to caution, he kept his tone even. “Kanda?”  
  
Kanda snapped from his shock, closing the journal. He said nothing as he gripped it tightly, knuckles white, expression stormy and eyes dark.  
  
Abruptly, Kanda slammed the journal onto the desk, not even bothering to utter a sound as he turned to leave.  
  
Lavi took a step forward. “Kanda-“  
  
The door slammed in his face, Lavi grimacing at the sound. His shoulders turned lax as he exhaled, his hand reaching back as he scratched the back of his head. “Damn…”  
  
Lavi could only imagine how angry Kanda was now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize I’m a little late updating this, but hopefully it was worth it! This chapter ended up being much longer than I thought it would, so. XD 
> 
> That being said, a lot happened here. There’s the question of what the Noah’s endgame is with what assignments they’re sending Tokusa on (and what that eventually will mean for Alma) and the attack that took place with the exorcists. Allen being more involved will definitely add something, especially with his eye, but there will be more on that next chapter. :3
> 
> There’s also Kanda who’s starting to dig up some things that have been hidden from him for some time now. Which, a lot of it is things he hasn’t questioned because...well, he always just assumed he was being told what he needed to know (especially regarding the attack that took place in the prologue). I can’t blame Kanda for poking around, though - he is making an effort to focus on more “princely” things, but he still hasn’t gotten over Alma’s disappearance and is struggling with how useless he feels. A part of what’s driving him is the need to do something, and being idle just doesn’t suit him.
> 
> (On another note, I also think it was about time he snapped at Legory. I know several people have mentioned they hope Kanda will just punch him, but I can’t have Kanda starting a war with Liorea. XD Having him go off was pretty satisfying to write, though.)
> 
> I don’t have too many more notes to add, but the next chapters will be a lot of buildup. So get ready for things to ramp up. >:3
> 
> In the meantime, I’m still aiming for the 2 week update schedule. It may be a bit wonky at times or there may be periods where I’m slower, mostly because I had the (not so bright) idea to take two graduate classes while working full-time, so I am....very, very sleepy. XD (Thankfully, this story is fully drafted so it just needs some heavy editing is all.)
> 
> I hope everyone is doing well, and has survived the first month of 2021 okay. As always, any thoughts/comments/kudos are appreciated! <3


	17. Revelations and Illusions

Kanda was livid.  
  
He stalked through the corridors, pace brisk; a stormy look brewed in his eyes, gaze clouded with ire. He hadn’t been able to calm down since going through the archives of past akuma attacks – after he had read about what had actually happened ten years ago. The mere thought was enough to send Kanda into a fury. All these years, and he had never _known_?  
  
He passed several servants, though they steered clear of Kanda immediately. No one dared to get in the prince’s way, his foul mood apparent. Even without understanding what had caused the prince to fall into such a state, they knew better than to get into the line of fire.  
  
Kanda didn’t spare any of the servants a second glance. He rounded the corner as he approached the throne room, though the doors were shut as two guards remained stationed out front.  
  
The guards took notice of Kanda immediately, as well as his current demeanor. One actually looked somewhat nervous as he spoke. “Um, is something wrong, Your Highness-?”  
  
“Is my aunt in there?” Kanda demanded.  
  
The guards exchanged uneasy glances, before the first one spoke up again. “She is, but she was speaking with Bookman and some advisors-“  
  
Kanda didn’t give the guard a chance to finish. He pulled one of the doors open, the weight heavy beneath his grip. He barely gave it a second glance as he stormed into the throne room, the door falling shut behind him with an alarming force.  
  
Anita looked up in surprise. She was seated on the throne, speaking to both Bookman and Mahoja. Two advisors were present along with one of the head guards, though Kanda didn’t even spare the energy to entertain what they might have been meeting about. He was too riled up, his composure dangerously close to collapsing.  
  
Anita stood, expression turning to concern when she noticed how distraught Kanda looked. “Yuu-“  
  
“I need to talk to you,” Kanda snapped.  
  
Mahoja scowled. She stepped forward, the rest of the occupants in the room too caught off guard to react properly. “You can’t just barge in here and interrupt a meeting-“  
  
“Mahoja.” Anita shook her head and turned to the rest of the attendees. “Everyone – please let us have a moment. I apologize for the interruption.”  
  
The advisors exchanged uneasy glances, but swiftly departed with the head guard. Bookman appeared somewhat warier as he offered a shrewd look in Kanda’s direction. The old man said nothing as he too departed.  
  
Mahoja was the last to leave. She seemed inclined to linger, though she didn’t dare disregard Anita’s request. Somewhat begrudgingly, she took her leave, though she spared Kanda a glance. “Watch that tone of yours,” she warned quietly.  
  
Kanda sneered under his breath as he heard Mahoja exit the throne room. As if he needed a lecture from _her_.  
  
Once the doors shut, the room grew heavy with silence. Anita placed her full focus on Kanda. “Yuu, what is it?” she asked. “You left so suddenly earlier and we never got a chance to really discuss what happened-“  
  
“Did you know?” Kanda interrupted Anita, not giving a damn if it were disrespectful. He needed answers and he needed them right then and there.  
  
Anita blinked, genuinely perplexed by the accusation. “Yuu, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said. “Please, try to calm yourself.“  
  
“Did you know it was the same kind of akuma?” Kanda’s eyes flashed, dark blue more scathing than normal. “I fucking read the description of the attack in the archives – the akuma that killed my father was the same type that spoke!”  
  
The explanation stunned Anita – so much that she couldn’t speak at first. She swiftly tried to collect herself, though even she struggled . “Yuu, this is something that’s still being looked into-“  
  
“Why didn’t you fucking _tell me_?” Kanda snapped. “I’ve been walking around thinking this is the first of its kind to show up and there was _another one_!?”  
  
“We don’t know if they’re connected,” Anita explained. “We don’t even know enough about akuma to know if this could be more common than we realize and I didn’t want to upset you.”  
  
“That’s such crap!” Kanda knew he was flying off the handle, but he’d lost control. All of these years thinking it had just been some regular akuma attack gone wrong and now there might have been some connection? “Exorcists and CROWs have gone missing and these winged monsters are showing up? That’s not a fucking coincidence!”  
  
Anita sucked in a breath. She brought her slim fingers to her forehead as she tried to keep herself calm, her nephew’s anger blustering against her like a tumultuous summer storm. “I understand you’re upset – this isn’t something I had intended to keep from you for long.” She looked up, meeting Kanda’s gaze directly. Her expression turned firm. “But, you can see why I didn’t tell you – just look at how you’re acting now. I know it’s upsetting, but you have no control and this isn’t something you can involve yourself in right now.”  
  
Although her words were spoken calmly, they were grating against Kanda’s ears. His chest tightened at the accusation about control in particular – of course, he had never been the most in control of his emotions. He was snappish and aggressive, with hardly any patience. But could he really be blamed in this situation? And the fact that Anita hadn’t told him so he wouldn’t try to involve himself further…  
  
He sucked in a breath, blood hot as it coursed through his veins. “So, that’s what this is about?” he asked, words growing cold. “That you’re worried I’ll go back to exorcism over this? Well, I’m not going to fucking sit around here all day.”  
  
“Yuu, you _can’t_ ,” Anita argued. “This isn’t even up for debate – we don’t know enough about this situation and you cannot allow yourself to be put at risk!”  
  
“This is the same type of thing that killed my _father_! The same type of thing that took _Alma_!” Kanda broke, before he even realized what he was shouting. His words struck him a moment later, the wind knocked from his lungs as a sudden wave of _exhaustion_ befell him. It was as though a heavy curtain had been shrouded over his body, his shoulders weighed down and chained to the earth.  
  
He just felt powerless. He felt tired and he felt _powerless_.  
  
He broke eye contact with Anita, almost too depleted to argue further. He didn’t even know how to describe how he felt at the moment – angry? Bitter? Hurt? Kanda didn’t know. He wasn’t good at putting a name to those things – he never had been.  
  
Anita’s expression softened as she watched Kanda come down from his explosive outburst. Taking a step forward, she reached up, her hand taking hold of Kanda’s cheek. Her touch was gossamer-light as she turned his face, her gaze wrought with concern.  
  
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” Anita apologized, words heartfelt and soft. A small frown tugged at her lips, her thin brow pinched. “Was Alma...?”  
  
Kanda tensed. He took a step back as he averted his gaze once more. No – no, he couldn’t talk about Alma right now. Not after losing so much control already. If Kanda started to talk about Alma to his aunt…  
  
_‘You’re so fucking_ weak, _’_ Kanda silently hissed at himself. _‘You haven’t been able to keep it together since…’_  
  
A heavy knock pounded on the doors, distracting Anita. She spared one glance for Kanda as though to check on him before speaking; when she saw he seemed to be a bit calmer, she turned back to the doors. “Please enter.”  
  
The tall, ivory doors pushed open as one of the guards entered. “Forgive the intrusion,” he offered, as he made a small bow of respect. “The exorcist general just returned. An akuma was spotted.”  
  
Kanda looked over, the words causing him to sober. He chanced a glance toward his aunt and saw that her expression also had shifted, a serious gleam in her eyes.  
  
“Was anyone injured?” she asked.  
  
The guard shook his head. “No – all exorcists returned unharmed. Shall I have them report to you here?  
  
Anita nodded. “Please – have Mahoja return with them.”  
  
The guard nodded before stepping out of the throne room.  
  
Kanda looked at Anita briefly before turning away. His words remained cool as he spoke, the faintest tinge of bitterness lingering on his tongue. “Do you want me dismissed for this?”  
  
Anita exhaled. She hesitated a moment as she thought. “No – you may stay,” she said, before looking at Kanda warily. “But, please…remember your place right now.”  
  
The reminder was unpleasant, but Kanda didn’t respond. If anything, he realized he was technically lucky – after how he had just exploded, it was something of a miracle that his aunt was even allowing him to remain.  
  
It wasn’t long before the doors of the throne room opened once again. A guard walked in with Mahoja – Tiedoll, Marie, and Allen in tow. Upon a first glance, they all looked fine; no one sustained any injuries as the guard had stated, aside from some wear. But upon closer inspection, Allen was noticeably a bit more scuffed up. Dirt smeared onto his clothes and his hair was a bit more unkempt – Kanda wondered if he might have been the first to have come across the akuma.  
  
Anita dismissed the guard as everyone else remained. She immediately took note of Allen’s disheveled appearance, concern blossoming in her eyes. “I was told no one was harmed,” she said, before speaking to Allen directly. “Are you alright?”  
  
Allen offered a small smile and nodded politely. “I am – I just got knocked down a bit.”  
  
“Allen was attacked by the akuma,” Tiedoll explained. “However, it didn’t do anything to him once it trapped him – instead, it pulled back and retreated.”  
  
Surprise flickered across both Kanda and Anita’s expressions, before the prince’s face shifted into a scowl. “What happened?” he asked.  
  
The exorcist all exchanged glances, expressions turning somber. Tiedoll was the first to answer. “We’re not sure. Allen and I had split from Marie when the akuma attacked us – another winged one.” He paused, before looking at Allen warily. “According to Allen, it was the same one that attacked the Lioreans.”  
  
Kanda tensed, eyes filling with shock. The same akuma? The same akuma that had taken…?  
  
“Are you sure?” Mahoja spoke up, tone holding an edge of skepticism. “What if it’s just a similar one?”  
  
Allen shook his head, expression pensive. “I’m sure of it,” he insisted. “I had caught a glimpse of it before and everything down from the markings to its hair were identical.”  
  
“And you let it _get away_?” Kanda snapped.  
  
Anita’s gaze shifted as she gave her nephew a warning glance, tone firm. “Yuu.”  
  
Kanda clamped his mouth shut. He recalled the interaction that had just taken place before and remembered he was still only present because of his aunt’s mercy, though showing any restraint was grueling. After all, this was the akuma that had attacked the Lioreans. This was the akuma that had taken _Alma._  
  
His fist balled. The thought of the creature having escaped sent Kanda’s blood boiling. The monster didn’t _deserve_ to see another day.  
  
Tiedoll hadn’t missed the subtle exchange between the two, as he looked between Anita and Kanda with a cautionary gaze. He took a breath before continuing. “It disappeared suddenly. With how it had pinned Allen down, we weren’t sure what it was going to do – but it let him go before flying off.”  
  
Anita frowned pensively. “It didn’t try to kill any of you?”  
  
“We don’t understand it either,” Marie said, finally speaking up. “It was…odd. At first, I thought it was waiting to attack, but when I listened for it, the creature had disappeared altogether.”  
  
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Mahoja said as she crossed her arms. “You’re all exorcists and have innocence. That alone would attract any akuma and cause some visceral response from it.”  
  
“That’s what we thought, but apparently not.” Tiedoll’s words were even as he made eye contact with Anita directly. “It seems it didn’t have an interest in any of us.”  
  
Anita tensed. Her gaze flickered to Kanda before she tried to contain herself, expression calm as she nodded her head. “I see.”  
  
Kanda’s focus shifted to his aunt. It only took him a moment to register the exchange between her and Tiedoll and the implications of the general’s words. Like water from a dam breaking, his earlier revelation came flooding back to him – the one about his father. When he thought about that and the last few attacks…  
  
Someone from a royal family had always been present.  
  
It only made sense for the attacks in Ilveria, he realized. Kanda wasn’t sure what the situation was in Othelion, but what he knew was that the last few attacks involving akuma had taken place when he was out – him or Duke Legory. Kanda hadn’t forgotten that he was related to the royal family in Liorea, but could akuma have been that strategic?  
  
“We have to lure it back out,” Kanda finally said. His words were surprisingly even despite his earlier upset, but a level of heated determination lingered in the undercurrent of his speech. “It wants something, and until we deal with it, that akuma is just going to stay out there and hurt other people.”  
  
No one said anything, the atmosphere tense. Anita appeared as though she wanted to counter Kanda’s words, but didn’t get a chance to before Mahoja spoke up. “We don’t know what it wants. Even Bookman and his apprentice aren’t certain – how would we know how to lure it out?”  
  
Kanda fought the urge to sneer at the comment – he knew it was faulty and suspected that Bookman probably knew more than he was letting onto. After learning what he had come across in the archives, Kanda wasn’t inclined to believe anything less. “We go back to the same place tomorrow – except this time I’ll go, too.”  
  
The throne room fell silent, everyone stunned by the idea. However, the silence was quickly shattered, first by Mahoja. “Have you lost your _mind_? This isn’t the time for you to try to be some hero!”  
  
“Kanda, Mahoja is right,” Tiedoll said. His tone was serious, expression grave. “This is a very dangerous situation and you’re not in a position to be going out-“  
  
“Why? Because you think there’s some connection?” Kanda turned to Anita, gaze accusatory. “That’s what you’re worried about, isn’t it? That these things could be targeting nobility?”  
  
Anita met Kanda’s gaze. The air remained tense, though she didn’t speak; she merely looked back at him, tired, weary.  
  
She didn’t know what to do.  
  
Tension thick, Marie spoke up. His voice remained calm despite the mounting unease in the room. “Whatever happens, we need to track this akuma. We’re not sure how dangerous it is.” He paused thoughtfully, mouth pressing into a thin, worried line. “The Midsummer Celebration is just over a week away. If we can, we should try to locate it before then.”  
  
Anita nodded. “I understand it’s a risk, but please do another patrol tomorrow – take additional guards.” She turned back to Kanda, tone firming. “I’m sorry, but you will have to stay – I cannot allow you to accompany them and put yourself in harm’s way.”  
  
Kanda looked at his aunt, heated displeasure in his eyes. He was compelled to argue and to push back against Anita’s resolve.  
  
Tiedoll interrupted, stifling any further discord. “We will go back out tomorrow. We have an idea of what area to scout now.”  
  
Anita nodded. “Thank you. Please, get rest – all of you.”  
  
The exorcists nodded, before turning to leave. Allen hesitated; he glanced back at Kanda, the tiniest hint of a frown on his lips. It was as though an unspoken thought lingered on his tongue, keeping his feet cemented to the ground as he wavered.  
  
However, Allen turned and departed.  
  
Once the exorcists left, Kanda looked back at Anita. His gaze simultaneously hot and cold, a tumultuous storm brewing behind his eyes. The prince forced himself to bite his tongue, though – as infuriating as it was, he knew it was a lost battle. He knew his aunt wouldn’t be swayed. That he was powerless in the situation.  
  
There was no point in arguing anymore.  
  
Without saying anything, Kanda left. Neither Anita nor Mahoja tried to stop him.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Allen was exhausted. Patrolling had taken more out of him than he had anticipated, the attack leaving him worn. He wasn’t even sure what it was; he had fought akuma before, often even of a more brutal nature. Considering how this attack had gone, Allen was lucky that worse hadn’t happened – lucky that he only came out of it a little dirty and scuffed up.  
  
He exhaled heavily as he leaned against the door to his room. He wanted to go to sleep, but was also famished. Maybe he would change into clean clothes and get food. Something.  
  
Allen opened the door as he went inside. He removed his cloak, the fabric dusted with dirt as he threw it over the back of a chair. Pausing, Allen took note of his appearance in the mirror hanging on the wall; his hair was in a mess, falling loose from its ponytail, and scratches were visible on his pallid skin. As he moved, Allen’s back felt particularly sore – there was probably a bruise beginning to form.  
  
_‘It did throw me pretty hard,’_ Allen thought.  
  
Wings fluttering, Allen turned as the gentle noise reached his ears. He smiled as he caught sight of Timcanpy, the golden golem having flown into the room.  
  
“Hey,” Allen greeted, the golem landing on his shoulder. “I was wondering where you were – did you end up keeping Lavi company?”  
  
Not a moment after he had spoken, Allen heard someone hurriedly approach the room. Looking over, he saw Lavi, hand on the doorframe. The Bookman looked a bit out of breath, almost as though he had run – however, he fought to keep himself composed.  
  
“Just heard you made it back,” Lavi said. Despite his attempt to remain calm and neutral, a hint of worry lingered in his one visible eye. “I heard there was an akuma – you okay? Gramps said it attacked you directly.”  
  
Allen smiled. He hadn’t missed the concern that trickled into his voice and was quick to ease it. “Yeah – I promise I don’t feel as terrible as I probably look.”  
  
Relief visibly washed over Lavi and he exhaled. “Good. I mean, I know you’re good at holding your own. But…” He trailed off, words turning a bit awkward. He rubbed the back of his neck as he broke eye contact. “You just never know with these things.”  
  
Allen laughed gently. “No, you don’t. But really – I am okay,” he reassured. “It just knocked me down. It didn’t even really attack me when it had the chance.”  
  
Lavi blinked. “What? Like it just…pushed you down and moved on?”  
  
Allen paused, expression turning pensive. “Well, it did attack us at first. But, it wasn’t exactly direct? It felt pretty evasive and then disappeared.” He quieted as he recalled the attack, the details feeling oddly surreal as he replayed them in his memory. “It pinned me down, so I thought it was going to be an ambush. Until it let me go.”  
  
“Huh.” Lavi crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall, expression also turning contemplative. “But…you guys all had innocence. And even that wasn’t enough to warrant it to stay?”  
  
Allen shook his head. “Guess not.” He walked over to the edge of the bed and sat down, taking a moment to rest his legs. “The queen regent asked us to go out on a patrol again tomorrow – we’re going to try to see if we can track it.”  
  
Lavi’s frown deepened. “Will that even work? Sounds like this akuma is being pretty elusive,” he murmured. “And like it wants something specific…”  
  
Allen’s silvery eyes flashed over to Lavi. Although Lavi’s additional comment had been added quietly, he hadn’t missed it. “That’s what Kanda thinks,” he said. “He was in the throne room when we all reported to the queen regent. His speculation is that the akuma could be trying to attack anyone of royal blood.”  
  
He paused, the theory sticking with him. Before, Allen hadn’t really taken such a notion into consideration – he had thought that the akuma were naturally attracted to innocence. Up until this most recent encounter, it made sense; mostly exorcists had gone missing, though CROWs had started to disappear as well. But, if royals were being targeted…  
  
“He wanted to go on the next patrol with us, I think to try to lure out any akuma. But, as far as I know that won’t be happening,” Allen explained.  
  
Lavi didn’t say anything. He wasn’t that surprised. After his earlier encounter with Kanda, it only made sense he would have come to that conclusion – and that he would have wanted to go back out onto the field. “Yeah, Kanda won’t want to sit back if he thinks he can do something about it. Can’t exactly be putting himself at risk, though.”  
  
Allen’s lips pressed together. Timcanpy flew off his shoulder, nestling onto the pillow of the bed.  
  
“Hey, Lavi – I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” Allen’s voice was somewhat soft and almost cautious, a curious look gleaming in his eyes. He met Lavi’s gaze. “Did Kanda ever say anything to you about Alma?”  
  
The question visibly took Lavi by surprise – before a dash of something uneasy danced across his expression. Swiftly, he forced himself to look neutral, a mask of confusion befalling his face. “About Alma?”  
  
“Yeah.” Allen eyed Lavi, gaze astute. He glanced off to the side. “I noticed how he acted when we couldn’t find him…and when we initially left, Alma was upset about something. But he never told me what.”  
  
Lavi paused, wavering on how to answer. He suspected that Allen wouldn’t question him further if he brushed off the topic, but something in Lavi’s chest didn’t sit right. He didn’t like keeping things from Allen.  
  
Tiredly, a sigh escaped him. “I don’t know all that happened between them,” he finally admitted. “Something did, but it wasn’t really my place to ask and I don’t know if it matters anymore.”  
  
There was a heaviness that clung to his words and a gravity that pulled at them. Lavi’s tone remained firm as his attention shifted to Allen, an almost warning look in his expression. “I wouldn’t ask Kanda about it. I don’t think it’s something he’d be willing to talk about.”  
  
Allen nodded. He understood that it wouldn’t be his place to ask – he didn’t know the prince on a personal level by any means and he wasn’t normally one to pry. He could imagine that it was for the same reason that Lavi likely hadn’t said anything before.  
  
Looking up, Allen met Lavi’s gaze. “Thanks for telling me. It just had been on my mind.”  
  
Lavi remained quiet, as he directly made eye contact with Allen. Their gazes locked for a fleeting second. Immediately, Lavi took note of the tiredness that lined Allen’s eyes – a look that promised restless nights and wear.  
  
A knotted feeling tugged in his chest and Lavi broke eye contact. “How are you doing?” he asked, tone shifting.  
  
Allen blinked. He hadn’t missed the shift, the Lavi’s voice turning almost gentle. His gaze turned perplexed as he looked at Lavi somewhat curiously.  
  
When Allen didn’t answer right away, Lavi chanced a look back. He took note of the exorcist’s flummoxed expression. “I mean…I know the last few days have been rough. With everything that’s happened.”  
  
As he spoke, Lavi’s words grew a bit distant. He knew Allen well enough to know that the exorcist cared incredibly deeply about the welfare of others – especially those he called his friends. After what had happened to Alma, Lavi had known the events had taken a toll on Allen – but as to how severe that toll had been Lavi wasn’t even certain. While he liked to pride himself on his skill for reading others, Allen was still at times a mystery – a puzzle that Lavi sometimes couldn’t quite figure out. And the fact that Lavi could only catch glimpses of how Allen was being impacted…  
  
It worried him.  
  
The room was still quiet. Lavi shifted a bit awkwardly, suddenly unsure of how to handle the silence. He shifted his feet around, his gaze glued to the ground. “Um. I just wanted to say if you need anything to…let me know.” His face felt a bit unusually hot and Lavi silently prayed his freckled skin wasn’t red.  
  
Allen watched Lavi, taking in the offer. After a few more seconds a slow, small smile stretched across his face, appreciation in his eyes. “Thanks,” he said, words warm and genuine. “That means a lot.”  
  
He stood up, walking over to Lavi. When Allen looked, he noticed a tiny tinge of color on the Bookman’s cheeks – something that brought an amused glint into Allen’s eyes. Although he was tempted, he refrained from bringing it up, though, not wanting to embarrass Lavi further.  
  
“If you want, you can come get some food with me,” Allen suggested, tone lightening a bit. “I’m starving after being out all day and I wouldn’t mind the company. I’m sure you could use a break, too.”  
  
Lavi paused. Allen’s words had been simultaneously teasing and genuine, once more catching the Bookman a bit off guard. However, he fought to keep his composure in place despite the way his nerves threatened to crumble – he didn’t understand how Allen always made it so difficult for him.  
  
“Yeah.” Lavi managed a smile, his languid demeanor gradually returning. “Sure – I could use a break.”  
  
Allen smiled. “Good.” He tugged on Lavi’s sleeve, the gesture holding a touch of playfulness. “Come on.”  
  
Lavi’s heart skipped at the lightness of the touch, but complied. He didn’t want to draw attention to the effect that small bit of contact had had on him – he didn’t want to even pay it a second thought.  
  
Quietly, he pushed them aside as he left with Allen. He needed a reprieve from work, so maybe his head would clear after. Maybe he was just thinking too much.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma slept poorly. He was exhausted, but the brightness of day threatened to creep into the ruins. It nudged him into consciousness periodically, his body too used to working beneath the sunlight. Wear tugged at his eyelids, body heavy and weak – he was tempted to wake up, but every time he shifted his body ached, muscles still sore and tender. He was depleted to the point of incoherency and couldn’t even recall where he was or what had happened.  
  
Despite his lack of coherency, Alma always fell back asleep. Somehow, on an intuitive level, he knew he didn’t want to wake up.  
  
He wasn’t sure how long he attempted to be still for. The ground was hard and damp, uncomfortable and rough against his bones. Alma wasn’t used to having a luxurious place to sleep by any means, but even hay or straw would have been preferable – anything to break up the impact of sleeping on cold stone.  
  
Eventually, the brightness that trickled into the ruins faded, the air turning cooler. Alma shivered, the change in temperature finally forcing him awake. Vision hazed with sleep, he blinked his eyes open, surroundings blurring into focus. The ruins were dark and Alma realized it must have just been sundown; through some of the cracks into the ceiling, he saw stars glittering above, the sky a deep purple toward the west.  
  
At first, Alma couldn’t remember why he was there. He was in a daze, memories blurred like a painting that had been splashed with water. He felt something was wrong, a deep ache having nestled itself into his heart – however, his mind threatened to shut down as he attempted to recall what had happened, insides knotting up with dread.  
  
His tail twitched behind him and suddenly Alma remembered.  
  
He flinched, disgust crawling through his veins. He tried not to look at his tail or hands, though his gaze inevitably traveled downward. Although Alma remembered that the blue appendages were attached to his palm, he tugged at them, silently wishing they would come off. They didn’t.  
  
Alma bit his lip. He looked around, remembering that Tokusa had been in the ruins when he had fallen asleep. Tokusa was nowhere in sight, though, the akuma-man having disappeared.  
  
Unease coursed through Alma. He momentarily feared that he was alone, or worse – that one of the Noah were nearby. Since he had awoken as a monster, he hadn’t seen any of them and had no idea where they were. For a fleeting second, Alma thought of trying to run away.  
  
_‘And where would you go?’_ a small, quiet voice asked him. _‘You’re not even_ human _anymore.’_  
  
Alma sucked in a breath. His heart dropped into his stomach, a wave of loss befalling him.  
  
Without thinking, he pulled the hood of his cloak over his head. Even if he was alone, he didn’t want to risk being seen as he was. Alma stood up, his blue eyes scanning the inside of the ruins. When he was certain there was no one hiding in any of the shadows, he quietly walked to the exit, steps gentle as he went outside.  
  
The air was cool and fresh – better than the damp and musty air within the ruins. Alma inhaled, the scent of wildflowers filling his lungs. For a moment, he almost felt okay. Not great by any means, but okay.  
  
_‘It actually is pretty here,’_ Alma thought, unable to deny the beauty of the scenery. The forest itself was lovely, the wildflowers sweet and fragrant. Fleetingly, Alma recalled how mesmerized he had been when he first crossed Ilveria’s borders, the nature as entrancing as a fairy’s realm. Looking ahead, the lake shimmered beneath the starlight and the thin sliver of a crescent moon, several swans once more swimming in the distance, feathers pearly white and pristine.  
  
A wistful, envious nudge tugged at Alma’s heart. He wished, if anything, that he had been turned into a swan or some kind of bird. At least then, he could have flown away. Just flown away and hid from everything.  
  
Nearby, something moved in his peripheral. Alma turned, alarmed – had he not been alone after all? He panicked, fearing it may have been a stranger, but soon recognized the figure crouched near the edge of the lake.  
  
Alma’s shoulders relaxed as he breathed a sigh of relief. He started over. “Tokusa?”  
  
Tokusa turned. He had been kneeling by the edge of the water, appearing to be cleaning his wrist. He carefully kept it concealed though as he stood. “So, you finally woke up?”  
  
Alma bit his lip. Because of how Tokusa sounded, he worried he may have slept for longer than usual. The last time he had fallen unconscious, several days had passed. “How long was I asleep for?”  
  
“Just the day.” Tokusa released his wrist. “Don’t worry – it’s been quiet here and you haven’t missed anything.”  
  
Alma nodded. His gaze flickered down to Tokusa’s wrist, taking note of the inhuman ways his joints connected – until he noticed something else.  
  
Eyes widening, Alma looked back at Tokusa with concern. “Tokusa, what happened to your wrist?”  
  
Tokusa shifted his posture, placing his left wrist from view. “It’s nothing-“  
  
Alma didn’t listen. He reached over, taking Tokusa’s wrist. Gently, Alma ran his fingers over it; across the ashen skin, there was a charred gash. It was deep and thin, which made Alma wonder if the wound had come from some sort of wire.  
  
“What happened?” Worry lingered in Alma’s voice as he met Tokusa’s gaze questioningly. “You should at least cover it up so it doesn’t get infected. Maybe I can make a bandage-“  
  
Unexpectedly, Tokusa laughed. The sound was dry and without a trace of mirth. “You’re that worried? Don’t be.” His red eyes gleamed in the darkness, as he pulled his wrist back from Alma. “It’ll heal in time. It just may take a bit.”  
  
Alma frowned. “But-“  
  
“Come on. Do you think it’s going to get infected as though I were a normal human? It won’t.”  
  
Alma clamped his mouth shut. He averted his gaze, suddenly feeling very foolish for how he had sounded. But, Tokusa was right – he wasn’t human. Just like Alma wasn’t.  
  
_‘That wound looks so bad, though,’_ Alma thought as he chanced one last glance at Tokusa’s wrist. He wondered how it had even happened. After all, if they had dark matter in their blood, did they get hurt the same way as normal people? Or had something else happened?  
  
Alma didn’t get a chance to ask before Tokusa spoke. He glanced back toward the lake, the moon steadily rising. “It’s good you woke up now. I still need to show you how to shift,” he said, turning back to Alma. “It’ll make dealing with this all a bit easier.”  
  
Alma blinked. He recalled Tokusa mentioning “shifting” the previous night, but he still didn’t understand what he meant by that.  
  
Tokusa motioned for Alma to follow before walking back to the edge of the lake. Alma complied, watching curiously as Tokusa pulled something out – a rectangular, golden strip of paper that bore several red markings.  
  
“What’s that?” Alma eyed the strip questioningly. He couldn’t help but feel that he had seen something similar before, though at the moment he was drawing a blank.  
  
Tokusa paused. “It’s a spell strip. They can be crafted for different spells,” he explained. “One is illusion.”  
  
Alma’s gaze turned thoughtful. “Spell strips…” he murmured, the name striking a chord. He had heard the term before back in Liorea. He had heard it when several CROWs were discussing it before going out…  
  
Alma’s gaze widened as he made the connection. “Like the ones CROWs use?” His mind raced, the pieces falling into place. The spell strips, the red dots on Tokusa’s forehead – he had seen a blonde CROW with a similar marking before.  
  
“Is that what you were before?” Alma asked, unable to stop himself. “Did you used to be a CROW?”  
  
“Used to be.” Tokusa’s words were cool as he brushed off Alma’s excitement. Taking out a second strip that was blank, he knelt down by the water. “Get down.”  
  
Alma wavered. He didn’t want to get too close to the water, mostly out of fear for seeing his own reflection. Swallowing, he did as instructed, careful not to glimpse at the smooth surface.  
  
Tokusa’s gaze shifted to Alma before he focused back on the strips. Taking the blank one, he held it over the water, the moonlight silvery as it befell the gold. To Alma’s amazement, the strip illuminated, a gentle glow overtaking it as several red characters appeared.  
  
Tokusa handed the strip to Alma. “Here – I activated it for you. Even if you’ve never messed with magic before, it should work with no problem.”  
  
Alma looked at the stripped, expression flummoxed. “What…what am I supposed to do with it?” He fingered the strip, the paper’s texture smooth like silk. “I’ve never even seen these used before…”  
  
“Like this.” Tokusa took the strip and touched it to the water, the paper somehow not soaking. To Alma’s surprise, the strip illuminated, the water around it taking on a slightly golden glow as well.  
  
Quickly, Tokusa removed the strip. The small patch of water remained gold before he cupped some with his hand and splashed it onto his face.  
  
Alma watched. His confusion lingered as he saw a luminous glow appear before it faded, Tokusa lowering his hands from his face.  
  
He looked human.  
  
Alma stared, completely in shock. He had all but blinked during the process, the change happened so suddenly that Alma had nearly missed it. When he looked, Tokusa no longer had any strange markings on his face, save for the two red dots. His skin was normal, his joints no longer knobby and mechanical. The protrusions from his shoulders were gone and even his _tail_ was absent.  
  
“H-How did you _do_ that?” Alma’s shock remained, completely stunned. It was possible for Tokusa to shift? To look _normal_ again?  
  
“Just put the strip onto the surface of the water. Once the moon is high enough, the moonlight charges the lake water. It works best for casting illusions. Since that strip has been activated, you just have to use it then splash your face with the water it touches.” Tokusa looked at Alma, a small frown tugging at his lips. “It only works when the moon is out, though, and it has to be this lake. The strip can only be used for the same area.”  
  
Alma nodded. He glanced back at the strip, a nervous tremor in his hand. He had never touched magic, with such things always being reserved for CROWs and exorcists – maybe a few scholars and skilled soldiers, if trusted enough.  
  
Silently, Alma feared that the spell strip may not work for him.  
  
Taking a quiet breath, Alma mimicked Tokusa’s actions. He somewhat shakily placed the strip onto the surface of the water, the same golden glow appearing around it on the lake’s surface. Carefully, Alma removed it, the water illuminating slightly – though he hesitated as soon as he caught a glimpse of his reflection.  
  
Forcing himself to ignore it, Alma splashed his face with the lake water.  
  
He immediately felt something warm wash over his body. It was soothing and strangely protective, almost as though a gossamer veil had been shrouded over his body. Alma hesitated to open his eyes, fresh droplets of water lingering on his cheek.  
  
_‘What if it doesn’t work?’_  
  
Again, the question silently posed itself, making Alma uneasy. If it didn’t work, he wasn’t sure how he’d handle the disappointment. He didn’t want to look back at his reflection and see something grotesque staring back.  
  
Tokusa didn’t miss Alma’s discomfort. “Come on,” he urged. “Open your eyes.”  
  
Alma bit on his lip. Very tentatively, he moved his hands from his face, blinking as he looked at them first.  
  
They looked normal.  
  
Alma stared. He blinked several more times, at first wondering if he was seeing things. However, the inhuman blue appendages were gone and his skin was no longer ashen – it was normal and warm and peachy, flesh-colored and _human._ Disbelief in his eyes, Alma brought his hands to his ears. They were no longer pointed.  
  
“I’m-“ Alma rolled up his sleeves, checking his joins and skin. Normal. Everything was normal. Amazed, he reached behind him-  
  
His tail was gone.  
  
Relief swelled in Alma’s heart, his eyes turning bright. For the first time in days, a smile stretched across his face as he stood up. “I’m _normal_ again!” he exclaimed, excitement bubbling over. “I can’t believe it!”  
  
Tokusa watched Alma warily, gaze serious despite Alma’s elation. He also stood. “Don’t get ahead of yourself,” he warned. “It’s an illusion spell – you’re still part akuma.”  
  
“But, I don’t _look_ like it anymore!” Alma turned back to Tokusa, ideas already spiraling. “Tokusa, we could leave now – if we’re careful, maybe we could get back to the capital city in Ilveria! We could get _help_!“  
  
Tokusa was caught off guard, Alma’s rambling stunning him for a moment. His expression shifted into a scowl as he scoffed. “We can’t. I already told you neither of us can leave-“  
  
“But why not?” Alma argued. His words were almost desperate, the thought of getting away far too tempting to ignore. “I know it’s a risk, but…but I think my friend, Allen, is still there. So are some Bookmen and…”  
  
He trailed off. Alma thought of Kanda, the prince’s face flashing in his mind.  
  
Alma took a breath. “I don’t want to stay here. And I don’t think you do, either.” He looked at Tokusa, gaze pleading. “ _Please_ , Tokusa? If we go now, maybe no one will notice - ah!”  
  
He yelped as Tokusa grabbed his wrist, yanking him away from the edge of the lake. Alma stumbled over his feet as he tried to keep his balance; Tokusa roughly pulled him forward, expression twisted into frustration.  
  
“Be _quiet_ ,” Tokusa hissed, his voice low. “You don’t get it – we can’t leave and you can’t say things like that. Not when _they_ could be listening-“  
  
“He’s right – we _could_ be listening.”  
  
The silvery, bell-like voice cut through their exchange, both Alma and Tokusa falling silent. Alma turned, looking back toward the ruins, his stomach dropping as he saw, Road standing just a short distance away as Tyki remained beside her. Even from a distance, their amber eyes all but glowed in the darkness, inhumanly bright light blazing embers.  
  
Alma realized with dread he didn’t know how long they had been there before. He hadn’t heard them approach and Tokusa evidently hadn’t either. Fear gripped his heart and he took a step back.  
  
Road’s attention gravitated to Alma for a moment before she smiled. “Aw. Not happy to see us? You’re going to hurt my feelings.”  
  
Alma didn’t get a chance to react. Within the blink of an eye, Tyki moved swiftly – suddenly in front of Alma and Tokusa as though he had appeared out of thin air. His expression held a hint of intrigue as he grabbed Alma’s wrist, yanking him forward.  
  
Alma’s eyes widened as he struggled. “L-let me go!”  
  
Tyki eyed Alma’s appearance, ignoring his pleas. “Another illusion spell, huh?” He smirked, sounding more amused than anything else. He chuckled lowly as he roughly released Alma from his grip. “You two really are desperate. Using some secondhand magic for a temporary fix.”  
  
Alma blinked, completely flummoxed. He looked at Tokusa, not understanding what Tyki meant. But when he turned, he noticed Tokusa’s expression: dark, stormy. The lines in his face were hard as he glowered at Tyki scathingly.  
  
Road giggled as she walked over. She wrapped her arms around Tyki’s waist as he held onto him dotingly, her head tilting to the side teasingly. “I don’t think he knows. You didn’t tell him, Tokusa?”  
  
Alma’s attention lingered on Tokusa. What had Tokusa not told him? He had explained it was an illusion spell to change their appearance and activated with moonlight and lake water. Was there something else to it?  
  
When Tokusa didn’t say anything, Tyki crossed his arms. He turned to Alma. “It’s like a bandage – it doesn’t actually do anything and it’s weak magic. It only works when the moonlight touches the water.” His smirk deepened as he met Alma’s gaze directly. “As soon as the sun rises, it’ll wear off. Doesn’t matter where you are.”  
  
Alma remained silent. He felt paralyzed as though he were staring into the eyes of a basilisk, unable to tear himself away from Tyki’s gaze. Slowly, the words sunk in.  
  
Just as swiftly as Alma’s relief at being normal had come, it was gone. His heart sank as he realized the reason Tokusa had insisted they couldn’t leave was simple – the spell would wear off come dawn. And the spell strip Alma had been given was only good if used in the same lake…  
  
_‘I…can’t leave,’_ Alma realized, the weight of the realization threatening to collapse onto him.  
  
Tyki’s lips curled. He took a step forward, unexpectedly bringing a hand to Alma’s face. Alma looked in alarm, taken aback, but was once more paralyzed as Tyki caught his gaze.  
  
“Even if you did get far enough to find ‘help’, it wouldn’t make a difference,” he spoke, voice low as he rubbed his thumb over Alma’s cheek. “Not when we can snap our fingers and remove it whenever we want.”  
  
As he said this, the skin on Alma’s cheek turned ashen, skin cracking as it grew hard and scaly as the akuma markings appeared beneath his eyes. The touch burned, Alma crying out as he pulled back, clutching the side of his face. “ _Don’t_!”  
  
Tyki allowed Alma to stumble back, the stable boy clutching his face as he fell to his knees. The section of his face that had changed stung as though it had been scraped raw and scalded, his breaths shallow. Slowly, the rough, ashen flesh shifted back, Alma’s face returning to normal as the effects of Tyki’s touch wore off.  
  
Tokusa watched, worry flashing in his eyes. He turned back to Tyki and Road, eyes narrowing. “What did you two come out here for? Did you actually want something or just to torment us?”  
  
Road hummed somewhat thoughtfully. “Finally eager to do something? Good.” She placed her hands behind her back as she looked at Tokusa, specifically addressing him. “You did a nice job, earlier – those exorcists will be sure to return soon. However, I don’t want you to do anything to them yet.”  
  
Alma looked up. His face still stung, but the pain had dissipated enough that he was finally able to focus on the conversation. _‘Exorcists?’_  
  
Tokusa sucked in a breath. His muscles had gone rigid, posture stiff as his words remained oddly even – almost mechanical. “What do you want me to do?”  
  
“Wait until I give you a signal – when I do, you’ll know when to attack.” Road smiled, her canines particularly sharp and glinting in the darkness of the night. “I already told you who your priority is. We want to make sure _he’s_ with them before we do anything else.”  
  
Alma frowned. Who were they talking about? Despite the wobbliness in his legs, Alma forced himself to stand. “What are you talking about?” he asked, voice shaking somewhat nervously.  
  
Tyki looked at Alma. “Oh, don’t worry – you’ll know what you need to soon enough,” he said. “I have to admit – I’m excited to see what you’ll be capable of. Considering how intense your first attack was I’m sure you’ll be useful as an akuma.”  
  
Alma sucked in a breath, recalling what Tyki was referring to. The attack. The attack he had somehow caused when he woke up and was alarmed about the dark matter. How did Tyki know about it, though?  
  
Tyki exhaled. “Well, there isn’t much left for me to do here. Unless you want to do anything, Road?”  
  
Road hummed. “Mmm. No. Not really.” She smiled at Tokusa and Alma. “But, remember – don’t leave. Or else the consequences could be very unpleasant. And we’re _always_ listening.”  
  
The words sent a chill down Alma’s spine, a shudder threatening to ripple through his body. Whatever the consequences were, he was afraid to find out.  
  
Both Road and Tyki turned. “Later,” Tyki said, as he offered a wave. Within the blink of an eye, they were gone.  
  
Alma looked around, perplexed by the sudden disappearance. “Where…where did they go?” he asked. “Tokusa-“  
  
He cut off as Tokusa turned to him, the motion sharp. To Alma’s surprise, Tokusa glared at him, gaze simultaneously hot and cold. “Don’t make any more suggestions,” he warned. “And do exactly as they say, got it?”  
  
Alma’s eyes widened, lips parting as a stunned look lingered on his face. “But…” He wavered, confusion festering in his thoughts. “Tokusa, I don’t understand – who were they talking about? They mentioned exorcists earlier, but did you see them?”  
  
Tokusa remained silent, gaze stony. He broke eye contact as he looked off to the side.  
  
Alma bit his lip. Slowly, he drew a conclusion – one that had already nestled itself into his imagination, despite his desire to ignore it. “Tokusa…you didn’t…you didn’t hurt anyone, did you…?”  
  
The silence loomed heavily, causing Alma’s unease to spread throughout his bones. Why would Tokusa answer him? Why wouldn’t he _look_ at him?  
  
Finally, Tokusa exhaled. “Just do whatever they tell you to do,” he mumbled, before walking away.  
  
Alma stared. He watched as Tokusa walked back toward the ruins. Alma was tempted to follow, but thought better of it; he could feel the dark cloud that loomed over Tokusa’s head, his insides churning from discomfort.  
  
Rubbing his wrist, Alma turned back toward the lake. Somehow, despite all that had happened, it remained calm. The surface remained glass smooth, the moonlight silvery as it shimmered upon the surface. In the distance, Alma saw a few more swans.  
  
Eventually, they flew away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine’s Day! (Or early Valentine’s Day - it’s technically still February 13th where I am XD).
> 
> I’ve been excited to post this chapter. There’s a lot with Kanda confronting Anita about what she’s been keeping about Izo’s death, as well as the mounting unease with what is going on with the akuma. Kanda might have gotten pushed back in this chapter, but he definitely isn’t about to give up anytime soon - so more on that will be on the way.
> 
> I also wanted to include another moment between Lavi and Allen. They’re both piecing together things, both with the akuma and themselves. Both are also semi-disasters when it comes to admitting how they feel, but I hope the interaction between them feels genuine.
> 
> The biggest thing about this chapter is probably the last scene with Alma and learning how to use the spell strip. I spent a while trying to figure this out, since it’s a key element of Swan Lake with Odette being able to turn back into a human when the moonlight touches the water. The spell strip made the most sense, especially with Tokusa being a former CROW - I couldn’t imagine any of the Noah giving that ability to them willingly. So, this was my way around it. :3
> 
> Chapters 18 and 19 will definitely pick up, so be ready for that! ;3 As always, comments and kudos are greatly appreciated - thank you for reading! <3


	18. The Attack in the Forest

The sun loomed in the east, dawn stretching across the sky as it melted away the darkness of night. The capital city of Ilveria was quiet, the last remnants of sleep clinging to its citizens. In the distance, the castle turrets gleamed with an almost ethereal sheen, the golden hour casting a stunning effect upon its architecture.  
  
Wisely watched it. He was carefully hidden away at the edge of the forest, the darkness of the shadows concealing him easily. Leaning against the tree trunk, he crossed his arms as a small frown tugged at his lips, eyes gleaming with annoyance.  
  
Leaves rustled from behind him. Without turning, Wisely spoke. “Do you think he’ll come today? If it’s the same group of exorcists, I’m going to throw something.”  
  
Tyki chuckled. He stopped beside Wisely, the hood of his white cloak pulled over his head. Face partially shadowed, he glanced at Wisely with a smirk. “Getting impatient again? I’d have thought if anyone was skilled at that, it would be you. You’re always complaining that everyone else rushes too much.”  
  
Wisely’s nose crinkled irritably. He sighed. “I don’t mind waiting if it’s for something _worth it_ ,” he pointedly clarified, finally tuning back. “I feel like I’m _wasting away_ – I’m much too talented to be kept here like this. Anyways, why are you always the one who gets to go into the city?”  
  
“Because you get distracted.” If anything, Tyki felt that Wisely was being overdramatic and brushed off the grievances. “Besides, you know why Lord Millennium wanted you here – to help monitor the new akuma hybrids while Fiidora handles the ones in Othelion.”  
  
Wisely huffed. “I suppose.”  
  
Tyki turned, slouching against a nearby tree trunk. He looked at Wisely curiously. “So,” he started. “What have you found out about the new one? Have you gone through his head and found his trigger yet?”  
  
An audible scoff fell from Wisely’s lips. “A little – but he’s got so many rushing thoughts that it gives me a migraine whenever I poke around in there.” He paused somewhat thoughtfully. “He’s done a good job at burying his emotions. There’s a lot of pain and hatred in his heart toward some of the noble class, but I’m still not sure what exactly will be the thing to set him off.”  
  
Wisely paused again, words turning a bit more thoughtful. He looked at Tyki curiously. “He did know the prince. He thinks of him quite often.”  
  
Tyki raised an eyebrow. He already knew that Alma had some connection to the prince – he had seen them out together in the city. However, hearing Wisely’s input was intriguing.  
  
“Hm. Well, maybe that’ll be useful,” Tyki said, tone turning a bit more serious. “Whether it’s that or something else, we’ll still have to find his tipping point – we’ll need to know it if we want to fully utilize him. The CROW was easy enough to figure out so the boy shouldn’t be too hard.”  
  
Wisely’s lips pursed, gaze turning contemplative. “You know,” he started. “We could just activate that dark matter fully – rather than waiting to do so indirectly. It isn’t as though we haven’t done it before.”  
  
Tyki exhaled. “You know we were instructed not to do that anymore.” His voice was almost tired, the conversation having been one that they had previously engaged in. “It’s like Lord Millennium said – when we activate the hybrids to their full potential immediately, they become unstable. That small bit of humanity left in there makes them too unpredictable.”  
  
Pausing, Tyki looked back at Wisely. He smiled. “It’ll be worth it, though – if we play our cards right, we won’t have to be here much longer. We just need to remove enough exorcists to break down their defenses.”  
  
Wisely hummed. The third, metallic eye on his forehead gleamed, his platinum hair bright against the darkness of his skin. “Right. Break down their defenses,” he repeated, his gaze shifting back toward the kingdom. “Break down their defenses and throw them into chaos…”  
  
Tyki grinned. “It’ll be easy.” He also turned, eying the city. “Ilveria isn’t as strong as the other kingdoms and there’s only one heir left in the royal family. Once he’s taken care of, it’ll fall into place from there.”  
  
“Hmph.” Wisely’s gaze remained skeptical as he looked forward, the sun steadily rising in the east.  
  
“It better,” Wisely said, voice soft. His tone turned dark, turning nearly inaudible as his eyes grew distant. “I’m so sick of how we’ve had to hide this way…”  
  
Tyki remained quiet. His expression had also shifted, amber eyes strangely cool and the lines on his face hard. Stony and unmoving.  
  
“Don’t worry,” Tyki said, voice gently as he broke the silence. “They’ll pay for what they did.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Five days had passed since the last akuma attack, and nothing had been found since.  
  
It was aggravating. Kanda had watched as the other exorcists repeatedly went out on patrols, day after day. Each time they ventured out determined to find something, whether it be a trail to follow or a hint – any clue to pinpoint the location of the most recently seen akuma. Every time they returned, they were empty-handed; no traces of the akuma could be found, the creature seemingly having vanished.  
  
Kanda exhaled, leaning against one of the marble pillars of the castle’s northwest portico. Frustration simmered in his chest as he ran his hand over his face, his words terse and worn with impatience. “You didn’t find _anything_?”  
  
Daisya crossed his arms. He leaned back against the opposite marble column, the hood of his cloak still pulled over his head. “Nope. Nothing.” He frowned as he looked off to the side, some servants exiting the doors not too far off. “It was just as dead as it’s been the last few times we’ve been out there. Allen’s weird eye couldn’t detect anything, either.”  
  
Kanda’s jaw tightened. The beansprout had been accompanying the Ilverian exorcists while the Lioreans stayed at the castle, which Kanda had hoped would have warranted _something_ more to show for. Even if Allen was at times annoying, his skills were useful – but it wouldn’t make a difference if no one could find anything.  
  
Irritably, Kanda sneered under his breath. “That damn thing is still out there,” he grumbled. “It couldn’t have just disappeared – it’s _somewhere_.”  
  
Daisya’s dark eyes flickered to Kanda. For once, his expression was oddly serious. “Yeah. But, right now we’re not finding anything. It’s doing a pretty good job at hiding,” he said. “The times Marie has gone out, he’s tried to listen for it – but it’s silent out there. We haven’t even come across any lower level akumas.”  
  
Kanda’s lips pressed together. In any other situation, the lack of akuma activity would have been a good thing; it would have been one less thing to worry about. However, Kanda knew better. Even if things were seemingly quiet now, something was going on.  
  
Something was going on, as it had been for years.  
  
It angered Kanda to think about. He still had not let go of the revelation he had experienced surrounding his father’s death – how it had been one of these strange, winged akumas that had killed him. His aunt could plead an excuse all she wanted, but it was definitely no coincidence. Anita’s resistance to allowing Kanda to partake in any exorcist duties only verified that, as far as he was concerned.  
  
But, could that really have been it? Could the akumas have somehow been targeting royals? Kanda hadn’t thought so at first, given CROWs and exorcists had gone missing. That and…  
  
Alma. Alma had gone missing, too.  
  
His heart dropped, the mere image of Alma’s face still too devastating for him to recall. Kanda tried to push any memories of him aside, his heart aching painfully. “This is stupid. If we don’t find it, who knows what it’ll fucking do next?”  
  
“Hey, believe me – we’re all worried about it. Tiedoll especially.” Daisya crossed his arms as he looked at Kanda curiously. “I get it, though. I’d be stir-crazy too having to sit on the sidelines.”  
  
Kanda scoffed in annoyance. “It’s ridiculous. I’d be a lot more helpful actually going out there.”  
  
“Yeah, but you know why you can’t. I know I joke a lot about it, but we don’t know what this akuma wants – and we don’t know if it could be trying to target royals. I mean, it’s attacked other people.” Daisya paused as he met Kanda’s gaze. “And if it _is_ trying to get royals, I don’t know if you should risk it – you _are_ the only heir here. It’s not like your aunt has any children or anyone else around who could inherit the throne.”  
  
Kanda sighed heavily. He loathed the rationale, but knew that Daisya was right. Kanda had been the only child born to his parents, his mother having died giving birth to him. And his father had never remarried, meaning that Kanda and Anita were the only ones left in the family line.  
  
If anything, it only added the pressure Kanda felt.  
  
“What the hell are we supposed to do?” Kanda asked, frustration returning. “Wait until Legory tries to go back to Liorea? It’s not like he’ll want to be put at risk.”  
  
Daisya snorted. “I don’t think he’s ever even touched a sword. But really, what would you have us do? Take you out as bait?”  
  
Kanda turned, as he glared at Daisya. “How else would you fucking lure it out? At least test the theory that way!”  
  
Despite the topic, Daisya laughed. “Shit, you are desperate to get out,” he said. “Good luck getting your aunt to okay that plan. Tiedoll won’t be so keen on it, either.”  
  
“Tch.” Kanda looked away in annoyance. He knew it was rash, but the searching was becoming exhaustive – his suggestion was risky to the point of being absurd, but if there was a chance of luring out the akuma, surely that was justifiable, wasn’t it?  
  
Daisya tilted his head to the side, arms crossing. “Come on. I know it sucks, but it can’t be that miserable being stuck here? It sounded to me like you at least made some headway with the idea regarding the seals.”  
  
Kanda released a breath. Since he had been unable to go out on any patrols, Kanda had tried to be vigilant in at least looking into security measures and pushing through the idea of using seals. It had taken a few days of some back and forth and Bookman had needed to get involved, but they had finally come to a solution.  
  
“We’re going to use talismans,” Kanda said. “They can be implanted into the ground and won’t erode like most natural materials – they should be able to keep out any akuma.”  
  
“Sounds like a win if you ask me.” Daisya flashed a smile, dark eyes bright beneath the shadow of his hood. “You should pat yourself on the back for that. It may not feel like it, but that’s something you’ve done that’ll be pretty helpful.”  
  
The comment caused Kanda’s ears to burn and he scoffed irritably. Despite Daisya’s optimism, it hardly felt like enough.  
  
“So,” Daisya started, his posture slouched against the column. He glanced over at the servants, several of them taking flower arrangements inside. “You guys implementing them soon? The Midsummer Celebration is just a few days away, isn’t it?”  
  
Kanda fought a cringe. The Midsummer Celebration had somehow crept up. Preparations were well underway for the event and Anita attempted to get the prince more involved. Kanda had desperately tried to avoid it, focusing on things like security measures and more meetings with the advisors. Anything to put the event out of his mind a little longer.  
  
Begrudgingly, he answered. “Yeah…”  
  
Daisya’s eyebrow rose. “What? You’re dreading it that much?”  
  
Kanda scowled, gaze flashing back to Daisya. “It’s going to be fucking aggravating. I don’t see the point of going to a ball when there are more important things to do.”  
  
Daisya shrugged. “Try to lighten up – it won’t be bad to let loose for a night,” he said. Somewhat knowingly, he looked at Kanda as a slight smirk tugged at his lips. “Besides – you’re supposed to chat up the ladies, aren’t you? I bet you’ll be basking in the limelight.”  
  
Kanda glared, practically seething at the comment. “That’s not _fucking funny_ ,” he hissed.  
  
“What? Seriously, how bad can it be?” Daisya shook his head, a teasing gleam lingering in his eyes. “Do you even know how you sound right now? ‘Oh, _woe is me_ , I have all these gorgeous noblewomen throwing themselves at me – whatever will I do?’”  
  
Kanda glowered. He looked as though he were about to strangle Daisya with his own two hands. “I fucking _swear_ -“  
  
“Okay, okay – I’ll lay off,” Daisya said, not foolish enough to miss the dangerous way Kanda was staring him down. “I mean, I guess I get it. You’re probably going to get an avalanche of attention if the word is out you’re looking for a courtship. You already attract enough stares from all the women in the city whenever we’ve ridden through.”  
  
“Tch. It’s not happening,” Kanda grumbled.  
  
“What, you’re not getting into a courtship?” Daisya asked. “I thought your aunt wanted you to consider one.”  
  
“Yeah and _it’s not happening_.” Kanda’s words turned cold, heart tight in his chest as he spoke. “I don’t care what she wants and I don’t care about what the advisors expect. I’m _not_ getting involved with anyone.”  
  
His voice was steely, resolve unyielding. Kanda knew where he stood. Even though his aunt was hoping he would engage with some prospects, there was no way he could do such a thing. The thought of a courtship alone was too much to bear, to open up and be so intimate with some _stranger_. Kanda just couldn’t imagine how he’d even pretend to be interested, when all he could think about was…  
  
Kanda’s stomach knotted. Thinking of being with anyone else other than Alma made him sick.  
  
Daisya watched Kanda. Despite his teasing nature, he hadn’t missed the strange shift in Kanda’s expression or the ways his eyes suddenly grew distant. He almost appeared as though he had gotten lost in a far-off memory, unreachable as something painful lingered in his gaze.  
  
Daisya uncrossed his arms, standing up a bit straighter. “Well, hopefully no one is expecting anything anytime soon, then.” He glanced toward the entrance of the castle. “I should get going – Bookman said earlier he wanted to meet with all the exorcists about something. And the queen regent. You should probably come, too – to see what’s going on.”  
  
Kanda’s lips pursed. He had already heard about this, though he wasn’t certain as to what Bookman wanted to share with them. Kanda certainly wasn’t about to miss out, though.  
  
Pushing himself off the pillar, Kanda nodded. “Let’s go.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
By the time Lavi made it to the meeting hall, Bookman was already there. Rather than meeting in the throne room, they had opted for a more enclosed space, but large enough for all parties to meet comfortably. The rectangular table was long and wide, the mahogany color smooth and glossy. Sunlight spilled in through the tall windows, the curtains pulled aside.  
  
The doors to the hall had been propped open with two attendants on either side, and Lavi entered. Bookman stood near the end of the table, as well as Anita and Mahoja. Lavi had caught the tail end of their conversation, the queen regent’s expression holding a hint of unease.  
  
Bookman turned to Lavi, his gaze locking on the redhead. “Did you bring what I asked?”  
  
Lavi nodded. “Yeah, right here.” He held up a journal, leather-bound and aged with wear.  
  
Anita looked over, taking note of the journal. “This was what was found in the archives?”  
  
Bookman nodded. “Yes – it’s similar to the sigils used by the CROWs and we believe they can formulate defensive charms in the meantime. The CROWs will be able to enhance them whenever they arrive.”  
  
Lavi blinked. He looked over at Bookman curiously. “That should be soon, shouldn’t it? Didn’t the duke say he had sent word to request them?”  
  
“He did, but they haven’t arrived yet,” Anita answered. As she spoke, a hint of nervousness prickled in her chest. “We’re hopeful that they’ll make it without any trouble, but we have yet to hear anything.”  
  
“We can only hope.” Bookman’s expression remained serious as he addressed Anita directly. “The rest of the other exorcists are on their way, correct?”  
  
Anita didn’t get a chance to respond before Tiedoll and Marie walked in through the doors, drawing everyone’s attention. Along with them was Allen, Timcanpy flying just behind him.  
  
Lavi grinned as soon as he saw them. “Speak of the devils.”  
  
Bookman turned to Tiedoll. “Is Daisya coming?”  
  
“He is – I think he was speaking to Kanda outside a bit earlier.” The general looked between Bookman and Anita, a concerned look on his face. “I understand you wanted to speak with all of us?”  
  
“Yes – let’s all sit down,” Anita suggested. “We can keep the doors open until Daisya arrives.”  
  
Everyone obliged, taking a seat at the mahogany table. Anita sat at the head with Mahoja to her left, the other exorcists sitting across from one another.  
  
Allen took a seat next to Lavi, Timcanpy perching on his shoulder. He looked over at the redhead curiously. “What’s this about?” he asked, keeping his voice quiet.  
  
Lavi opened his mouth to answer but paused as he saw Bookman across the table, his darkly rimmed eyes meeting Lavi’s sharply.  
  
Lavi caught himself. He shifted in his seat as he carefully brushed off Allen’s inquiry. “You’ll see.”  
  
Allen raised an eyebrow. Lavi was being oddly evasive, but he didn’t pry further. He would find out soon enough.  
  
Footsteps were heard from outside, brisk and hurried. Everyone’s attention shifted when Daisya stopped just in the doorway, along with Kanda.  
  
“Wow, didn’t realize we were holding everyone up,” Daisya said as they walked inside.  
  
“Shut the doors,” Bookman instructed.  
  
Kanda turned to the attendants and nodded to them to do so, the heavy wooden doors shutting behind him. Quickly, he found a seat to the right of his aunt – the one he usually took during meetings. He caught sight of her in his peripheral, though Anita didn’t say anything about his attendance.  
  
With everyone situated, Anita spoke. “Thank you all for coming. I understand the last few days have been quite tedious.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “What was it you wanted to speak to us about?”  
  
Anita exchanged a glance with Bookman, wariness returning to her eyes. “A few things, though it was Bookman who proposed this. As you all know, he and Lavi have been extensively looking into these attacks and what could be the driving force between them.” She glanced around the table, expression more severe. “I understand this speculation has already been going around, but we’re moving forward in sending the suggestion to Liorea that royals are distinctly being targeted.”  
  
Everyone exchanged glances before Tiedoll spoke first. He looked at Anita curiously. “Have you spoken with Duke Legory about this yet?”  
  
“No, not yet,” Anita answered. “I’m not sure where Legory will stand on this. It may mean he’ll need to stay here for longer until we can ensure there is added protection for him to take when returning to Liorea.”  
  
Kanda frowned, his dark blue eyes shifting to his aunt. Admittedly, he wasn’t surprised by this news – he had been vocal about this theory already, though if his aunt were moving forward with reaching out to Liorea about it, then that meant the issue was becoming severe. Such suggestions weren’t made unless there was absolute certainty, either.  
  
Silently, Kanda wondered if something had happened to make his aunt act on this.  
  
“Truthfully, I don’t think this will necessarily come as a shock to those in Liorea,” Bookman said. “They’ve already been steadily increasing security for the noble class, but if the akuma are beginning to attack nobles then the implication is what will be alarming: that these akuma attacks are being coordinated by someone else.”  
  
The air grew tense, Bookman’s suggestion seeping into the atmosphere like a breath of winter. More glances were exchanged, the realization striking everyone like an icy blow.  
  
“Wait.” Daisya shifted in his seat, completely thrown off by how the conversation had turned. He looked around between everyone else questioningly. “I don’t get it – I thought akuma couldn’t be easily controlled? Is that even possible? We can’t even contain a low-level one for too long before it goes berserk.”  
  
“It’s not possible for ordinary people to control them, no.” Lavi spoke up, leaning back in his seat. His expression had turned oddly serious as he spoke. “But, there have been practitioners of magic who could.”  
  
Bookman stepped in, speaking up. “Some of you may recall the incident that took place around a little over a century ago involving a family of practitioners – skilled sorcerers who served the royal families.”  
  
Allen was the first to draw the connection. “The Noah Family…”  
  
The description and name immediately caught Kanda’s attention. Within seconds, he recalled this particular family, though he hadn’t heard their name mentioned in years. Even in his history studies, the Noah had been barely spoken of, their actions having been deemed treacherous. Kanda could still recall the way the tutors always skittered around speaking their names aloud, disgust in their eyes – even his aloofness had not allowed him to miss those details.  
  
Yet, now they were being brought up – though Kanda didn’t entirely understand why.  
  
“The Noah...” Daisya leaned onto the table as he looked at Marie and Tiedoll questioningly. “I’m confused – who were these guys?”  
  
Tiedoll answered. “The Noah were a family of sorcerers who assisted and advised all three royal families. Several of them dwelled within each kingdom and they helped to control any akuma activity with protective spells.” He paused, words growing heavy as he continued. “It was during this time that innocence was first discovered.”  
  
Bookman elaborated. “The Noah all advised against the use of innocence, initially instructing the royal families as to how dangerous it was. However, it was eventually discovered that the Noah were the ones controlling the akuma to begin with – and manipulating those in the royal families. They were dealt with soon after.”  
  
“So, what about them?” Kanda crossed his arms, expression somewhat scrutinous. “They were all dealt with, weren’t they? That was over a hundred years ago, so it’s not like they’d be around.”  
  
Bookman’s eyes flashed to Kanda. “We don’t know for certain. It’s unlikely, since they were all supposedly killed – but that doesn’t mean they didn’t somehow save their lineage. We can’t be sure.”  
  
“King Lvellie isn’t going to be too thrilled to hear this suggestion,” Mahoja murmured.  
  
Tiedoll looked back at Anita. “Is there anything you want us to change regarding our patrols over this?”  
  
Anita nodded. “We still would like for you to scout the forest for any akuma sightings, but please be wary of any unusual activity – even in the city. While we could be mistaken in this, we don’t want to overlook anything.”  
  
As Anita said this, Kanda abruptly recalled his outing in the city with Alma – just as the face of that stranger flashed through his mind. Immediately, he shook the thought from his head. He wasn’t sure why he had thought of that man. Even if he was a creep, he probably hadn’t been anything more than that.  
  
“In the meantime, Lavi and I have worked to create a new set of sigils,” Bookman said as he nodded toward the journal Lavi had brought. “We’ve based them off some sigils recorded that we found in the archives – a bit similar to what CROWs periodically use. These should be able to be applied to your anti-akuma weapons, ensuring both yourselves and your innocence are protected.”  
  
“For real?” Daisya grinned, excited by the news. “That’s great – it’s like armor.”  
  
“As long as it works.” Lavi looked a bit warily at the others. “It’s not like we have an akuma to test it on, but it should be okay – just make sure the sigil doesn’t get destroyed.”  
  
Tiedoll nodded as he looked at Bookman appreciatively. “Thank you – it will be useful to use these on our next patrol.”  
  
“Yes, thank you both,” Anita said, addressing Bookman and Lavi. “I plan to meet with Legory later today to explain to him our position on this. I don’t like the idea of alarming him, but I don’t see how it can be avoided.”  
  
Kanda scowled. “We should make sure that the attacks are being directed at royals,” he said, before looking at Anita specifically. “You’re always saying we can’t cause a panic without undue cause – shouldn’t we at least test this before sending word to Liorea?”  
  
Mahoja frowned, speaking up before Anita. “How would you suggest we do that?”  
  
Kanda inhaled. He knew he was possibly going to run into a dead end with this argument, but his stubbornness wouldn’t allow him to back down. “If I go out on a patrol-“ He paused, when he saw the resistance already forming in his aunt’s expression. “ _One_ patrol. We could see if any akuma show up. There haven't been any sightings in five days now. That’d tell us if the akuma are attacking royals are not.”  
  
Tiedoll sighed. “Kanda, you know that’s too much of a risk-“  
  
“So, what the hell are we going to do? Wait until Legory tries to go back to Liorea?” Kanda’s eyes flashed agitatedly as he crossed his arms. “He’s not a trained fighter – _I_ am. If there’s an attack, I can at least defend myself. Waiting until he or another royal travels will only endanger them until we know what we’re dealing with.”  
  
No one said anything at first, tension seeping back into the air. At first, Kanda wondered if someone would push back since that had been what repeatedly had happened the last few times he breached the topic. But to his surprise, no one did so. And in fact, some even appeared contemplative.  
  
Finally, Daisya spoke. “He kind of has a point…”  
  
“Daisya,” Marie warned, voice low.  
  
Tiedoll’s expression remained pensive. He posed a cautionary glance in Anita’s direction, before speaking carefully. “At some point, the duke will need to return to Liorea. In a way, it would be wise to know what sort of attacks we may need to anticipate – if another attack occurs at all.”  
  
Anita’s lips pressed together. She didn’t look comfortable with the idea, expression lined in unease.  
  
Bookman frowned. “This is a very dangerous idea. You should all be aware that these sigils can be damaged when out,” he advised. “That means any extra protection could be stripped quickly.”  
  
Allen shifted in his seat. He had remained fairly quiet, his silver eyes thoughtfully as the conversation unfolded. He took a breath. “What if we retreat? If the attack becomes too much, we leave the area.” Allen glanced between everyone at the table. “I know our goal was to kill the akuma, but for this time we could prioritize getting back to safety before anything happens. This way, we’ll at least know.”  
  
Kanda’s attention shifted to Allen, lips twitching into a frown. He didn’t like the idea of retreating.  
  
Surprisingly, Anita nodded. “I see,” she said, her voice holding the faintest hint of nervousness. She took a breath, turning her attention to Tiedoll. “This one time I’ll permit Yuu to go on patrol – on the condition that his safety comes first. If any akumas are sighted, please have him retreat immediately.”  
  
Kanda turned back to Anita, completely taken by surprise. Normally, such a condition would have incensed him – after all, he wasn’t weak or delicate. However, he couldn’t even focus on that detail as one thing stood out above all else: she was going to let him act as an exorcist again.  
  
Tiedoll nodded. “Understood.”  
  
Marie turned to Tiedoll. “You already were out on one patrol this morning – did you want to go on a second today?”  
  
Tiedoll paused. He glanced at Kanda before nodding. “Yes, I think going out a second time today would be good. It’s early enough the sun will be out for a while.” The general looked back at Bookman. “How long will it take to prepare those sigils?”  
  
Bookman hummed. “Not long – maybe an hour or so. Lavi and I can have them ready then.”  
  
Anita nodded. “Very well. Please have them ready,” she said, voice heavy. She turned to Kanda, gaze imploring. “Please do exactly as General Tiedoll instructs you – I don’t want anything to happen to you.”  
  
Kanda made eye contact with his aunt and immediately wavered. For a moment, things almost didn’t feel real; he had become so used to getting shut down about taking back on any exorcist duties that he almost couldn’t believe Anita was even allowing it. However, the look in her eyes was enough to remind him that it very much was real.  
  
He nodded. “Don’t worry,” Kanda said. “Nothing will.”  
  
  


* * *

  
  
During the last few days, Alma had started to sleep less.  
  
At first, he hadn’t thought much of it. Alma had been so distraught that he had assumed he had been too stressed to catch a wink of slumber. He still hadn’t become used to what he now was, his akuma form strange and uncomfortable. Night was the only time he ever felt at ease, when he could use the illusion spell that Tokusa had given him, restoring his body to normal and allowing him the fantasy of pretending to be human – but Alma didn’t want to sleep during that time. He didn’t want to sleep when he could finally feel normal.  
  
When the sun rose, he wasn’t allowed the mercy of sleep. After a few days, Alma had asked Tokusa about it, to which he only laughed dryly. _“The longer you’re an akuma, the less you’ll need it,”_ he had said.  
  
If anything, it only emphasized the permanence of Alma’s situation.  
  
Alma sat back against the stone wall, hidden away in the shadows of the ruins. Near the exit, he saw the golden glow of light spill through, the sun still high in the sky. A part of Alma longed to go out and bask in its warmth, but he was still too nervous. Though no one had come to the ruins since Alma had first awoken there, he still feared that someone may see him.  
  
He sighed. Night – he would wait until night.  
  
His tail twitched a bit behind him and Alma tugged at his cloak, pulling the hood over his head further. Whenever in his akuma form, his clothing felt uncomfortable; his shirt was loose enough the protrusions on his shoulders weren’t too bothersome, but several times Alma had thought of removing it. Or cutting off the sleeves.  
  
_‘Then you’ll be cold tonight,’_ a voice warned him. _‘You always get cold at night.’_  
  
Alma exhaled. He wished he could fall asleep.  
  
His attention broke as the sound of footsteps reached his ears. Looking up, he saw Tokusa walking back into the ruins.  
  
Alma brushed his bangs aside. “Did you go for a walk?”  
  
Tokusa shrugged. “Just to the water. You know, you can technically go outside as long as you don’t get too far.”  
  
Alma bit his lip, averting his gaze. “What if someone sees us?”  
  
“We’ll probably sense them before they get too close.” Tokusa crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall opposite of Alma. “Just wanted to remind you. You may go stir-crazy staying in here all day.”  
  
Alma rubbed his wrist, still somewhat avoidant of making eye contact. He couldn’t deny that staying in was maddening; Alma was used to being busy constantly, having lived a life of continuous labor. Before, he would have been hard at work, managing the stables and tending to the horses. Making sure they were fed, saddling them for any nobles or soldiers.  
  
Alma’s heart panged. His life may not have been perfect, but he missed working with the horses. He missed working with them, just like he missed Allen and…  
  
_‘Don’t,’_ Alma told himself, his thoughts jerking at the memories that threatened to bubble in his chest. _‘Don’t think about him…’_  
  
His efforts were in vain. All too easily, Alma recalled Kanda: his face, his voice. It was terribly painful, the memory of the prince practically torture. Alma had tried so hard not to think about Kanda ever since the exorcist examination, but who was he fooling? He had already fallen too hard, knee-deep into something that he could never have. Alma had doomed himself to a fate of longing for someone he could never be with.  
  
If it hadn’t been apparent before, it most certainly was now.  
  
A fresh wave of sadness overcame Alma, his heart sinking as though it had been dropped into quicksand. He sucked in a breath, slightly shallow and uneven as he brought his knees up to his chest, his tail wrapping around them in an almost comforting motion.  
  
Tokusa eyed Alma, not having missed the shift in his demeanor. A hint of sympathy flickered in his red eyes, his expression momentarily softening. “Hey…”  
  
Alma blinked, looking up at Tokusa.  
  
Before Tokusa could say anything more, someone else entered through the doorway. The steps were nearly inaudible, but both Alma and Tokusa turned, still alerted.  
  
Wisely walked inside. His golden eyes scanned the interior of the ruins before his attention swiftly landed on Tokusa. “You – Road needs you.”  
  
Tokusa’s expression hardened, his red eyes narrowing as he met Wisely’ piercing stare. “What for? Kind of a vague command to give.”  
  
For a second, Wisely’s gaze darkened, gold turning to ice as he stared down Tokusa. A strangely focused look appeared in his eyes before his lips twitched, a slow, gentle smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. “Should you be talking back after what happened last time? You know better than anyone how we feel about insolence.”  
  
To this, Tokusa snapped his mouth shut. The fire in his eyes simmered, anger silent as he forced himself to hold his tongue.  
  
Wisely crossed his arms over his chest, his attention lingering on Tokusa. “It looks like our patience has finally paid off. Road will be waiting for you. Go find her,” he said.  
  
Tokusa sucked in a breath. “You’re not going to tell me what I’m supposed to do?”  
  
Wisely scoffed. “Do you need a reminder? We’ve already told you.” He sighed somewhat exasperatedly. “Road will give you more specific instructions when you find her. There will only be one target for you, so don’t fail. If you die, that’ll be on you.”  
  
Alma looked between them, alarm coloring his face. “Wait, what’s going on-?” he started to ask.  
  
Wisely turned to Alma, tone turning sharp. “You’re not needed, so this doesn’t concern you.” He looked back at Tokusa, tone turning impatient. “Don’t just stand there – get a move on.”

  
Tokusa gritted his teeth, his tail swishing behind him agitatedly. However, he said nothing as his fists balled; he stole one last look at Alma. “Don’t do anything stupid while I’m gone.”  
  
Alma frowned as he saw Tokusa start off. Standing up, he looked back at Wisely. “Where is he going?” he asked, confusion brimming in his eyes. Despite the days that had passed, Alma was still just as in the dark as he had been before. He didn’t understand what strange and twisted plan the Noah were using him and Tokusa for. All Alma knew was that it involved the exorcists and attacking them…  
  
Alma’s insides coiled. Several days ago, he had been able to put together enough to know that something had happened – that Tokusa had had some sort of encounter with the exorcists. But no one had been hurt then, so what of this time?  
  
As Alma’s thoughts turned, Wisely looked back at him. A small frown tugged at his lips as he eyed Alma pensively. “Ugh. You’re so annoying with how much you worry,” he grumbled. “But, fine – since you want to know so badly I might as well tell you. Especially since Tokusa may or may not come back.”  
  
Blood turning cold, Alma swallowed. “What do you mean?”  
  
Wisely shrugged. “Regardless of whether we’re successful in killing our target doesn’t guarantee Tokusa will return alive. One of the other exorcists may very well kill him.” His eyes gleamed as he looked at Alma, lips stretching into a smile. “For that reason, you’re backup.”  
  
Alma stared. He was unable to break eye contact at first, Wisely gaze was eerily hypnotic; in many ways, Alma felt as though he had been tied down, his mind slowly being chipped at as he was stripped of all his defenses, open and vulnerable as something cold and slimy slithered up his spine.  
  
Sucking in a sharp breath, Alma looked away. “Tokusa will come back,” he said. “He won’t hurt anyone-“  
  
Wisely snorted. “Are you that in denial? Of course he would. After all, he was the one who attacked _your_ traveling party.”  
  
Alma stiffened. He turned back to Wisely, mouth agape, almost too stunned to speak as the words sank in.  
  
That day. That day some monstrous akuma had attacked them. Some winged creature that was horrific and grotesque…  
  
“That…” Alma shook his head, as he recalled the memory. It was muddled and terrifying, a blurred vision of a nightmare that had scarred his psyche before falling unconscious. “That wasn’t Tokusa – that akuma was completely different! And even if it was, he wouldn’t!”  
  
Wisely raised an eyebrow, somewhat intrigued. “You really never realized? Interesting. I would have thought by now you’d have caught on. I guess I’ll have to spell it out for you.”  
  
Wisely took a step closer and Alma instinctively backed up. However, the stone wall was right behind him, cold and hard as it prevented him from moving.  
  
Wisely smirked. Even though he was a slightly smaller stature than Alma, the air about him remained imposing and ominous, like a poisonous viper ready to strike. “We’ve already told you what we’re making you into – newly created akumas, made from life rather than death. Emotions are so much rawer that way.” He tilted his head to the side, amber eyes luminous and mesmerizing. “We move the process along slowly since it’s easier to control you this way, but if we really want to, we can expedite the process. And the end result is really quite terrifying.”  
  
Alma shuddered. This part wasn’t new to him – Tokusa had explained this much when he first woke up, body distorted and changed beyond recognition. He took a small, shallow breath, heart palpitating in his chest.  
  
Detecting Alma’s unease, Wisely continued – almost as though he were taking pleasure in the whole experience. “We occasionally need akuma like you and Tokusa to complete specific assignments. The form you’re in now isn’t even close to what your actual akuma form will be – just like Tokusa’s.” He grinned. “Road will be sure to push him into his full form soon, with just enough of his consciousness left so he doesn’t go _completely_ insane. Eventually, the same will be done to you.”  
  
The words felt like ice-encrusted needles sticking into Alma’s chest, his breaths turning straining. Slowly, panic mounted in his core.  
  
He swallowed. “What…” Alma tried to keep his words from shaking, his vocal cords trembling like a brittle leaf. “I don’t understand…what do you want us to _do_? What does _Tokusa_ have to do?”  
  
“We just want you to help us.” Wisely met Alma’s gaze, as he smiled. “Today, he’ll start by killing that prince.”  
  
Alma’s thoughts skidded to a halt.  
  
The prince. There was only one prince that Alma knew of nearby and that was…  
  
“Y-Yuu?” The name barely slipped from Alma’s lips in a whisper, his mind still reeling.  
  
Kanda. They were talking about killing _Kanda_ -  
  
Wisely blinked, expression turning slightly perplexed as he placed a hand on his hip. “Oh, that’s right – you knew him.” He brought his fingers to his chin, gaze thoughtful. “Just what were you to him? One of his servants? Or something else? I suppose if Tokusa fails you could be useful for finishing the job. A familiar face could be just the thing to lower his guard down.”  
  
Alma stared, completely horrified. He almost couldn’t even fathom what Wisely had just said, the reality of the situation once more collapsing onto him like an avalanche.  
  
Kanda. They wanted him to kill Kanda if Tokusa failed.  
  
_‘Tokusa.’_  
  
Something snapped in Alma. Without thinking, he moved, shoving Wisely out of the way as his hands sparked with ultraviolet light, splinters of electricity manifesting as a blast of energy exploded from his palms.  
  
Wisely screamed, clutching his face as the attack seared his cheek. “ _Damn it_!” he hissed.  
  
Alma took his chance, breaking into a run. He hurried out of the ruins, looking around frantically. Tokusa was nowhere to be seen, and Alma realized he had no idea where he had gone off to-  
  
Something caught his attention. Alma turned, though he wasn’t sure what it was; it was almost as though something were instinctually pulling him in a direction, his sense prickling as he looked southeast.  
  
Before Wisely could catch up to him, Alma ran.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
It felt strangely surreal to be back in the woods. Kanda looked around, taking in his surroundings; the trees were just as lush as he remembered, the scent of wildflowers thick and fragrant. Cool, damp moss clung to trees, the grass soft beneath the hoofbeats of the horses.  
  
All of the exorcists had ridden out, with the exception of Marie. Tiedoll rode just ahead while Kanda and Allen kept just behind them; tailing them at the end was Daisya, while two additional guards remained in tow.  
  
Kanda tried not to think about the guards too much. It was a bit annoying to think that extra soldiers had been pulled onto the patrol because of him, but it couldn’t be helped; Kanda knew that if he wanted to be out, he was going to have to compromise.  
  
“How much farther are we heading?” Kanda asked.  
  
Tiedoll hummed. “Just a bit up ahead – we’ll be going to the same area we went to earlier today. It’ll be slightly off the main road.”  
  
Kanda nodded.  
  
As they rode on, Allen glanced over, Timcanpy flapping just behind him. Since leaving, he hadn’t said much to anyone, let alone Kanda. They weren’t close by any means, but Allen was unable to keep his distance for long.  
  
Cueing his horse, Allen moved a bit closer to the prince. “Hey.”  
  
Kanda turned. He looked a bit surprised, not having expected Allen to speak to him, but scowled nevertheless. “What?”  
  
The response was terse, though Allen hadn’t expected much; Kanda had never been too friendly with him before. However, he wasn’t deterred. “I never got a chance to ask how you knew Alma.”  
  
The exorcist’s words took Kanda aback, completely catching him off guard. Allen all but could have thrusted a sword into Kanda’s chest and the reaction would have been the same: his heart constricted painfully at the mere mention of Alma’s name.  
  
Inhaling sharply, Kanda broke eye contact. He glowered. “Tch. Did fucking Lavi run his mouth to you?”  
  
Allen frowned. “No – in fact, he told me not to bring it up.”  
  
“Then why the hell didn’t you listen to him?” Kanda’s gaze flashed as he glared at Allen icily, his words coming out in a low hiss. “It’s not like it’s any of your fucking business.”  
  
“You’re right – it’s not,” Allen conceded, words simultaneously firm and soft. He met Kanda’s gaze directly. “But, Alma was one of my best friends…I cared about him, too.”  
  
Despite the way his heart ached, Allen’s words caused Kanda to waver. He averted his gaze once more, his grip on the reins of his horse tight.  
  
“Did he ever say anything to you?” Kanda asked, his words barely audible.  
  
Allen blinked. He hadn’t expected such a question but pondered it before shaking his head. “If you mean about you or when we left, then no,” he said, before adding after a pause, “He was upset about something, but he wouldn’t tell me what it was.”  
  
Kanda’s shoulders slumped. Even without any additional context, he knew what it was that had upset Alma. He had been the one to cause it. Yet despite this, Alma hadn’t uttered a word about it to Allen…  
  
Kanda exhaled. Even when hurt, Alma had been terribly thoughtful. He had been far too good for Kanda.  
  
Tiedoll slowed the pace of his horse, tugged the reins as he looked back. “Everyone, keep your guard up – we’ll be heading off the path soon. Make sure your sigils are activated.”  
  
Everyone nodded. Kanda reached over as he fingered the hilt of his sword, a golden spell strip having been wrapped around the handle.  
  
Silently, Kanda tried to push any thoughts of Alma aside.  
  
  


* * *

  
  
Alma couldn’t stop running.  
  
He moved fast – faster than he had thought possible. Alma hadn’t taken into consideration how the dark matter might have affected his strength or stamina, but it clearly had some effect; the trees blurred together in a mesh of colors, Alma dodging through the woods at an unnatural speed. He paused only momentarily to look around, pointed ears twitching as listened for any signs or Tokusa – or any signs of the exorcists.  
  
Silence filled the air, Alma’s heart racing in his chest. He didn’t know what he was even going to do, but he had to do something – he had to find Tokusa before he hurt anyone and before he hurt _Kanda_.  
  
_‘I have to hurry before Wisely finds me,’_ Alma thought, his unease bundling into a tight ball. He hadn’t forgotten how he had attacked Wisely and could only imagine how the Noah would react once they caught him.  
  
Alma shook his head and tried to focus. He couldn’t worry about that now – he had to concentrate.  
  
Again, something instinctive pulled his attention. Alma still wasn’t sure what it was, but it coursed through his body like an alarm. It was almost as though something magnetic were tugging him, urging him with a silent call as it beckoned him onward.  
  
Unable to ignore it, Alma followed. He ran once more, darting through the trees like a flash.  
  
Hurry. He had to _hurry_ -  
  
The sound of voices reached his ears, Alma stopping abruptly. He glanced around, swiftly detecting the direction of the noise. His heart thudded in his chest aggressively, an icy wave of unease suddenly washing over him.  
  
People.  
  
Alma clutched at the clasp of his cloak. He had kept it on and tugged at his hood, pulling it over his head as far as possible. Cautiously, Alma took a few steps forward, wary as he peered through the trees where the main road came into view.  
  
Alma didn’t dare go any farther, clinging to the shadows of the trees as though they were a safety net. Gripping onto the trunk of a tree, Alma hid behind it, his body still as he peeked out.  
  
When he looked, he saw a group of people riding – the Ilverian exorcists and a few guards. Allen was with them, with Timcanpy fluttering just behind him, and beside Allen…  
  
Alma’s attention gravitated to Kanda immediately.  
  
His heart lurched. Automatically, Alma’s eyes stung, his emotions unexpectedly threatening to break like a dam. It was difficult enough seeing his best friend so close by, but to see Kanda as well was almost too much; more than anything, Alma wanted to run out and shout. To call for them and to scream. To run into Kanda’s arms and _beg_ him to take him back to Ilveria, away from that forest.  
  
Biting his lip, Alma almost took a step forward-  
  
Allen stopped, pulling the reins of his horse. He frowned, looking around as his eye activated.  
  
Alma tensed. Instinctively, he shrank back behind the tree.  
  
The rest of the party stopped, the exorcist general turning back to Allen. “Is something wrong?”  
  
Allen continued to look around warily. “My eye just activated on its own – something must be close.”  
  
Alma’s lungs stilled, his breath hitching in his throat. Had…had Allen’s eye activated because of him? Dread filled Alma’s veins as he suddenly questioned his actions – had he made a mistake?  
  
_‘You’re an akuma now – of course it’d detect you,’_ a voice snidely chided Alma. _‘What did you_ think _would happen? You’re such an idiot…’_  
  
Alma bit his lip. Suddenly, he felt powerless – he wasn’t sure what he’d actually be able to do in the state he was in-  
  
He gasped as a hand roughly grabbed him from behind. Before he could utter any other sound, his mouth was covered by his assailant’s other hand, Alma’s eyes wide with shock.  
  
“Sneaking out here? That’s a bold move,” Tyki whispered, voice low. “You’re supposed to be back by the lake with Wisely.”  
  
Alma kept still. His blue eyes flashed back toward the road, where he could see the other exorcists.  
  
Tyki smirked. He hadn’t missed where Alma’s attention shifted toward, his gaze lingering on the prince in particular. Tyki chuckled lowly. “That’s right – I remember you two were together in the city that one day, weren’t you? Figured you were just one of his servants at the time, but now I’m really curious. I’d even be willing to take a shot in the dark and say you like him.”  
  
Alma’s muscles turned rigid, the accusation cutting. Tyki’s hand was still clasped over his mouth, leaving him with no choice but to keep silent.  
  
Tyki leaned forward. His breath was warm against Alma’s ear, causing him to shudder. “Is that why you ran out here so quickly? Because you wanted to _protect_ him? That’s almost romantic.” Tyki’s grip loosened over Alma’s mouth, though his words remained low, ominous. “You know you can’t go out there – not with what you are now. After all, do you _really_ want your prince to see you like this? He’ll only have to kill you if he sees you.”  
  
Alma’s throat tightened, unable to speak despite Tyki having removed his hand from his mouth. The words were cruel and taunting – merciless. Pathetically, Alma’s response came out in a quiet tremble. “Please don’t…don’t hurt him.”  
  
“Sorry – no can do.” Tyki refused to let Alma go, keeping him in place. His face loomed close to Alma’s – so much that their cheeks nearly brushed against one another. “Don’t worry. Road instructed Tokusa to be quick with him.”  
  
Alma yanked his face away from Tyki. His attention once more shifted to the party of exorcists, everyone having demounted their horses as they scanned the area.  
  
Alma stilled when he saw something.  
  
He blinked. He hadn’t noticed it at first – a dark silhouette crouched above high in one of the trees across the main road. Alma wasn’t certain as to what it was; it almost looked like some short of large bird, but none like he had ever seen. The wings encompassed it, shielding it from view, its body still as a statue.  
  
Alma stared, completely transfixed. He noticed with shock a rim of violet light around its body – an aura. Confused, he looked back at the rest of the exorcists. None of them noticed it.  
  
Tyki grinned. “See that?” he asked, referring to the silhouette. “It’s the perk of being an akuma – you can detect others of your kind when humans can’t. Even that cursed eye the Liorean exorcist has won’t see it right away.”  
  
Alma stared. He watched as the silhouette finally shifted, its wings moving in the branches.  
  
A few horses whinnied, one of the exorcists trying to calm them. “Something’s freaking out the horses!”  
  
Alma’s gaze moved. Like a magnet being tugged, his attention landed on Kanda, the prince appearing as though he were about to draw his sword.  
  
Alma’s thoughts raced. Tyki had grabbed him from behind, keeping a hold onto his shoulder. But, he had left Alma’s hands free, likely having thought Alma would have been too frightened to do anything.  
  
Tyki was about to be _severely_ mistaken.  
  
Quickly, Alma yanked himself from Tyki’s grasp. He elbowed the Noah’s core with all his strength, momentarily stunning Tyki. Without even thinking, Alma’s hands sparked before he threw a blast of ultraviolet energy, aiming for where the silhouette was as he shouted, _“It’s a trap!”_  
  
Chaos ensued. The impact of the explosion had been more than Alma had anticipated, smoke and debris clouding the air. The horses shrieked, kicking up their hind legs as the exorcists activated their weapons, guards drawing their swords.  
  
The sound of wings beating through the air filled Alma’s ears – just as he saw the aura of the akuma diving through the smoke.  
  
Tyki pulled Alma back roughly, his arm twisting back as Tyki shoved him against a tree. Alma cried out, his focus shattered as the sound of the exorcists shouting filled his ears.  
  
“Oh, you _really_ are a handful, aren’t you?” Tyki’s amusement had dissolved, his words far icier than normal. “Guess it serves me right for letting my guard down – I may have underestimated how much trouble you could be.”  
  
Alma’s jaw clenched, the bark of the tree rough against his skin. “I’m not helping you!” he shouted. “I don’t care what you do to me! I’m not helping you hurt _anyone-_!”  
  
He cut off as a searing pain flared through his body, Alma’s vision turning white. Had Tyki not been holding him up, he would have collapsed; it felt as though his body was on fire, muscles feeling as though they were being shredded. Faintly, Alma heard something _sizzle_ before he realized what it was: his skin.  
  
It was his arm – his whole sight side. His skin darkened to charcoal, skin turning hard and cracking apart like dried lava. Alma squirmed from the pain, his vision spinning.  
  
“Keep talking,” Tyki warned. “And I’ll turn you fully – I’ll make it so you’re the one to kill that prince.”  
  
Alma blinked his eyes open, the whites having turned red. Blearily, he looked back toward the attack, the sound of several blasts being made. The smoke was too thick, and Alma couldn’t see anyone clearly – until he saw a familiar silhouette.  
  
“Yuu!” Alma called, before raising his voice as loud as he could. “ _Yuu-_!”  
  
“That’s _enough_ ,” Tyki hissed. He gripped Alma’s wrists, his nails sharp as they dug into Alma’s flesh. “Now, you’re just started to get annoying-“  
  
Tyki stopped talking, as another explosion took place – this time, one of golden light. It held a strong enough impact that the earth trembled beneath their feet, Tyki’s eyes flashing as he looked through the smoke. “ _Damn it.”_  
  
He gripped Alma, pulling him back. “Guess you and I are retreating – damn CROWs,” he seethed.  
  
Alma turned back, eyes wide. He tried to look through the smoke, but didn’t get a good view before Tyki dragged him back, Alma’s body too weak from the pain to fight back. _‘Yuu…’_  
  
Alma didn’t have it in him to scream anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday! (Or Monday, since it’s probably already the beginning of the week in other timezones XD)
> 
> A lot happens in this chapter, and it’s really where things start ramping up. After what has felt like forever, Kanda finally gets to go out an act as an exorcist - which was sort of a relief for me to write. He’s not a character who likes to be idle and writing him go stir-crazy was making me stir-crazy. XD (And while Anita told him this would be his one time out, it definitely won’t be the case - not after how this chapter ends.)
> 
> And of course, there’s Alma - who finally has figured out a huge part of the Noah’s plan (and it involves - _surprise_ \- an assassination attempt on the prince’s life *gasp*). Even with all he’s going through, he’s not about to give in that easily - not when Kanda is involved. Regardless of his situation, I think Alma’s prone to having a protective personality, to the point of almost revealing himself as an akuma. It honestly killed me a little to have Alma get so close to doing so that he could _see_ Kanda, but not all is lost yet for a reunion. :3 
> 
> I realize that with the last scene, a lot of the action is obscured. That will all be revisited in the next chapter though, looking at the fight from Kanda’s POV. 
> 
> That’s all the notes I really have for now. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. ^^ As always, kudos and comments are appreciated!


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